


Rule Number Five

by Reithel



Category: Frozen (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Best Friends, Childhood Friends, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Little brother Olaf, Roommates, Slow Burn, long time crush, non incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-21 16:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 90,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11948010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reithel/pseuds/Reithel
Summary: Don't fall in love. It was the only rule that Elsa implemented; the only reason why she accepted. Anna laughed because, really, how can she fall for her best friend who she basically grew up with?





	1. Best Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Disney owns Frozen, and other characters and places to be mentioned. Whatever software, apps, websites, products, brands, and anything that is copyrighted that I might use does NOT belong to me. I own nothing but the plot.

One... two... three... fou— _just how many did she drink?_

Elsa frowned as she stared at a certain redhead completely wasted and sprawled unceremoniously on the fine marble flooring of the living room. Every exposed freckled skin was flushed, and her nose wrinkled upon catching a waft of alcohol. If only her professor on that one research subject didn't run late today, maybe she would've gotten home earlier and prevented this rather unfortunate scene.

"Anna." Elsa shook the girl gently, earning a groan and incoherent mumbling.

Sighing, Elsa placed her papers and folders on top of the coffee table and removed her bag before lifting Anna up to take her to her own room. She silently thanked her usual visits to the gym and Anna's petite stature for this task to not be so difficult.

Save for the irregular beating inside her chest.

Truth be told, Elsa didn't want to go home for the night. While waiting for her professor a few hours earlier, Anna sent a message saying something about a breakup with her most recent boyfriend. Elsa knew that her best friend needed someone to talk to, someone who would undoubtedly listen to her rants, but hearing the girl ramble about how painful it was hurt Elsa too.

She'd been in love with Anna for a long time.

In her mind, she knew how wrong it was. They were both girls, but that was the least of her problems. Anna was her best friend. Had been for more than a decade now. Their families had been friends since forever and they were practically sisters, often having sleepovers until high school ended. Once they were both in universities, they started living in the same apartment miles away from home.

Elsa's parents didn't mind, but Anna's only agreed because Elsa was with her. The blonde had always been the responsible one. They knew that their daughter was in safe hands and really didn't have any problem with that arrangement. But for Elsa, it was a huge catastrophe and a test to see if she was strong enough to cast away her feelings for her best friend.

It was difficult.

How can she move on when they live under the same roof?

Relief pooled in Elsa's chest, and she couldn't stop herself from releasing a lengthy sigh. Mercifully, Anna was already wearing house clothes. It saved her the need to worry about changing her outfit. It was already one thing that they live together, but Elsa didn't know if she could take undressing the unconscious and currently vulnerable redhead.

Shaking away the thoughts, Elsa went back to the living room to fix the mess. There was a slight pang in her chest the moment she saw a lot of crumpled tissue paper around the bottles of alcohol. Images of a crying Anna invaded her mind, strengthening her guilt for choosing to go home late just because she couldn't take listening to the girl's broken-heartedness. Though the blonde knew this had always been the routine every time Anna would break up with a boyfriend, she couldn't lie and say she wasn't hurt when seeing the girl of her affections cry.

Regardless of whether the break up was because of true love or not.

* * *

The world was spinning, and even though it was dark, Anna felt like throwing up. She felt like shit. She couldn't remember the last time she had drunk so much. Elsa would always stop her when she took too much of the offending liquid, but last night, the blonde wasn't there.

"Morning."

Anna didn't need to open her eyes to know who that voice belonged to, knowing full well who it was after hearing how it changed over the course of time. Groaning because of a terrible headache, she tried to push herself off the bed.

Elsa picked up on the girl's problem and chuckled lightly. "Here," she offered, reaching Anna's side and helping the girl up. "Drink this."

Not hesitating to drink whatever pill it was Elsa placed in her hand, Anna drank it because she knew it would help ease the throbbing sensation inside her head. Elsa was a magician that way, always managing to make everything better.

Feeling something cold touch her lips, Anna reflexively held on to the stuff, not caring that Elsa's hand was being trapped between her own. "Ugh," Anna groaned after drinking a full glass of water.

After the redhead drank everything, Elsa placed the glass on top of the nightstand and patiently waited until Anna could open her eyes. It took all she had to act nonchalant because she knew that once her headache was gone, a series of rants and complains would come her way.

"I'll be in the kitchen. Come out if you feel like eating." Elsa suggested and left the room, leaving the redhead who was still rubbing her temples.

One... two... three... Anna wasn't sure how many minutes passed but soon, her headache became manageable. She opened one eye just to test the waters.  _Yep! All better!_  Puffing out a harsh breath, she stood and blinked a few times before letting her feet guide her where her nose and stomach was asking her to be.

Elsa smirked when she saw the redhead's unruly mane. "That was fast."

"Shush!" Anna raised a finger, demanding her to keep quiet. "You owe me a feast today!"

"Oh? And why, exactly, do I owe you?"

"You weren't here last night! How come you left me alone to drink all of tho- Where are the bottles?!" Anna turned her head from side to side, wondering if she threw the bottles out before she passed out in the living room.

"I threw them away. It reeked in here last night." Elsa crossed her arms. "Shouldn't you have better control than that? I still don't get why you keep drinking when you're such a lightweight."

"It helps me forget the pain." Anna flopped down on one of the stools, ignoring the blonde's inquisitive eyes. "It's not like I always do it. Only when things get a little too much," she mumbled under her breath.

As soft as it was spoken, Elsa heard it and inwardly rolling her eyes. If she shared the same attitude, maybe she'd be a drunkard. Being with Anna every day, living under the same roof, was more than just a little too much. But no. Elsa knew better than to depend on alcohol.

"So why did you break up with Jack?" Elsa decided to jump straight to the issue, but Anna simply glared at her. "Sorry, was it Elias? Terrence? Sled? Oh wait, that was the third, I think? Let's see..."

"Hans!" Anna growled.

"Oh, yes! That one!" Elsa snapped her fingers and laughed when Anna's face turned pink. "So what makes him different from the last four guys you've been with this year?"

Hearing Anna ramble about her most recent Mr. Perfect wasn't the best thing Elsa wanted to talk about, but she knew that Anna needed to vent. Whatever it was that Hans did, it created quite the impression. After all, it was the first time this year that Anna was hurt enough to drink.

"I really thought he was the one! He's handsome, smart, athletic and a gentleman!" Anna crossed her arms petulantly and frowned. "But he was just waiting until he can get inside my pants!"

"What?!"

"Oh, come on, Elsa! I didn't agree!"

Elsa's mind short-circuited at the information spilling out of her best friend's lips. She didn't know how to react or what to say. She wanted to run after that Hans or whoever it was and kick him where it hurts until he was no longer capable of bearing any child in the future. The thought was very tempting, but Elsa wasn't the violent type. She  _has_  to be reasonable.

"Okaaaay?" Elsa raised a skeptical brow.

Anna groaned and took one of the glasses on the table that Elsa prepared earlier and poured herself some water. Because of her mushy mind, the water spilled out of the glass. Elsa made a mental note to wipe the kitchen island later.

"I really hate his guts! He said he wants me to avoid you and move in with him! Like, he's telling me to totally ignore you!"

"So why didn't you?" Elsa grabbed a towel from the kitchen counter.

"Are you serious?! There's no way I'll ignore you, Elsa! You're my best friend and I've known you far longer than he did!" Anna whined and the side of Elsa's lips twitched, threatening to curl into a smile. "If he really loves me, he'll accept my friends and won't ask me to avoid them!"

Elsa fought back the heat that was slowly creeping up her cheeks and went back to the kitchen island to wipe the water that spilled out of Anna's glass. She wasn't sure what to say. She knew that if Anna moved out, it would be easier to move on, but the idea of Anna moving in with some guy who was trying to get inside her pants didn't sound too appealing either.

"Sooooo... you don't 'love' him anymore?" Elsa asked while quoting with her fingers.

"Of course not!" Anna answered immediately, making Elsa smile quite sadly.

That had always been the routine for them. Anna would have a boyfriend, break up after a few weeks, cry herself out and suddenly, she was no longer in love. Elsa was happy to know that Anna didn't love any of those guys, but she was also skeptical. What if one day, Anna actually fell in love? Would the redhead really leave her?

"Alright... Well, we're still in the middle of the year. There are many guys out there." Elsa snorted when Anna shot her a glare. "What? No more? That's new. Usually, when you break up and move on, you'll search for another guy."

"Very funny." Anna rolled her eyes. "It's not my fault they looked so sincere! Besides, I can't turn them down! That will probably hurt them!"

 _If I asked you out, will you also agree because you don't want to hurt me?_  Elsa took big gulps from her glass of water to push away such thoughts.  _Conceal, don't feel_ , she repeated to herself. It was taking everything that she had to make sure nothing will ever slip out of her mouth. The last thing she wanted was to confess her feelings to this hopeless romantic friend of hers.

"I'm through with relationships," Anna said suddenly.

"Oh?"

"I'm serious!"

"You say that every time you deal with a breakup, Anna. Once you go out there and see another guy who fits the description of 'Prince Charming', you forget about it." Elsa pointed out a little dryly.

"I'm serious this time! From now on, no more prince charming. If you ever see me with another guy again, I give you permission to drag me away like you own me!"

"Are you sure? People will see you being dragged away by the collar." Elsa smirked.

"Okay." Anna's face scrunched up. "Maybe be gentle?"

Elsa hid her giggles behind her feminine hands and delighted at the way Anna pouted like a child.  _Look away_ , she chided herself. She was conscious of staring at the redhead for too long. It helped that Anna was a total airhead and oblivious to her feelings, but she didn't want to take chances.

"How about you? Any girlfriend yet?" Anna started laughing and slamming the table on pure bliss when Elsa choked on her drink.

Anna knew that Elsa wasn't straight. She knew because Elsa told her before and she noticed it herself. They were best friends, after all. Anna didn't mind because to her, it doesn't change the fact that Elsa was still the same girl she grew up with. To her, it doesn't matter that Elsa was gay.

"Still nothing? What about the brunette I saw with you once?" Anna asked after getting herself together. "Bianca? Betty? B... Bella?"

"Belle," Elsa corrected. "There is nothing going on between me and Belle, Anna. We're just acquaintances studying the same course."

"And you just so happen to be members of the same gym." Anna wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Come on, Elsa! It could work! She looks pretty and kind!"

"I'm not looking for love, Anna. It comes naturally." Elsa gently lifted her glass to take subtle sips of it.

"I didn't know you were romantic."

"I'm not." Elsa denied as she settled her glass on top of the kitchen island. "I just don't want to waste my time on someone who won't stay in my life. I've seen you miserable countless times because of 'love', thank you very much."

When Anna didn't say anything, Elsa started feeling uneasy. She knew that look on the redhead's bright and beautiful turquoises. It wasn't hurt that flashed in it but plain mischievousness. Anna was thinking about something that could probably drag Elsa into another one of her shenanigans. Elsa braced herself by drinking another glass of water while desperately hoping the ground would swallow her whole.

After a few agonizing seconds, a huge grin stretched across Anna's face. She crossed her arms and settled them on top of the kitchen island while staring intently at Elsa. The blonde didn't know what to do with herself and was afraid to hear what Anna has to say.  _It's not going to be good_ , she thought.

She was proven right when she heard Anna's next words.

"Make me your girlfriend, Elsa."


	2. Persuasion

Water trickled down Elsa's forehead as she continuously punched the innocent bag in front of her, imagining it was her own reflection. She was a regular in the gym and, combined with the pent-up frustrations, she didn't want to stop. Belle, a fellow member of the gym who trained under the same coach, was exhausted and was left breathless, simply watching her beat up the poor bag.

A few weeks after she and Anna moved in the big city, Elsa came to the realization that she had to do something to sort her thoughts accordingly in order to not look at Anna romantically. She decided to go to the gym and exhaust herself by exercising. Her mind would probably protest and say it was unhealthy to think about the bag as herself, but it didn't matter. As long as it would relax her for an ample amount of time, it was alright.

The last couple of days were more stressful than the others. Right after Anna mentioned something about being her girlfriend, Elsa's mind worked in overdrive. Anna tried to explain, but she was already too far gone to listen. She knew that Anna was as straight as a ruler and that she falls in and out of love easily. Elsa might be hopelessly in love, but she didn't want to be another one of the redhead's flings, and she most certainly didn't want to be an experiment.

"Elsieeeeee."

_Oh God._

Punching the bag with more force than she did all day, Elsa braced herself for what was to come. She let her hand linger for a moment and gathered herself together before looking at the awkward girl standing by the door. Anna wore a smile that Elsa knew was crooked and forced. She had never been one for the gym, and that was fine because she never followed Elsa there... until now.

Sighing, Elsa wiped her forehead with the back of her hand and walked towards the redhead. As much as she didn't want to face her right now, she was also unsure where this situation could lead them. Anna was already uncomfortable enough; Belle's glare wasn't welcomed.

"What are you doing here?" Elsa shrieked when Anna jumped and gave her a hug. "A-Anna! I'm sweaty!"

"Yeah." Anna agreed and pulled away to search for something inside her bag. Before Elsa knew it, her forehead was already being wiped with a sweet-scented towel. "You should really wipe your sweat from time to time. You'll get sick."

"I'm in a gym, Anna." Elsa rolled her eyes, a fond grin splitting across her face. "I think it's normal for people to get sweaty here."

"Well..." Anna leaned closer and took a sniff around Elsa's neck. "I still think you smell nice, unlike other people's sweat."

Elsa blushed. She cleared her throat and grabbed the towel from Anna. "I didn't know you go around sniffing people out."

"I don't! They just have a strong body odor!"

"Riiight." Elsa let the towel hang on her shoulder. "So, why are you here?"

"You know why I'm here,  _Elsie._ " Anna playfully winked.

Ever since Anna made that crazy suggestion, she had been calling her 'Elsie.' It was her childhood nickname, but the redhead and most of the people stopped calling her that way since high school. She wasn't entirely certain how to interpret that form of endearment: nice or torture.

"Anna, I said no," Elsa repeated for the nth time since then.

"But why not?" Anna's eyes snapped somewhere behind Elsa before quickly looking at the blonde again. "Are you finally going out with Belle?"

"For the last time, Anna, I'm not interested." Elsa stepped out of the room and made her way to the locker room.

"Come on, Elsie! You said you don't want to waste time with people who won't stay in your life, but I'm pretty much stuck with you forever!" Anna slammed Elsa's locker and looked at her pointedly.

"I still don't get  _why_ I should make you my girlfriend."

"Well, that's because you ran away from me before I explained!" Anna crossed her arms and puffed out her chest, trying to look intimidating. Elsa raised an eyebrow as an invitation for her to continue. "You know, I just think you're not sure how to pick up a girl."

"What?!"

"You're clueless about love life, and I think you're afraid because you don't know what should and should not be done."

Sometimes, Elsa couldn't keep up with the way Anna's mind worked. Coming up with a weird and ridiculous explanation just to explain Elsa's behavior was something only Anna was capable of. Not once had she ever thought that the only reason why Elsa didn't have a girlfriend was that she already had someone special.

"What does that have to do with us pretending to be lovers?" It was a miracle Elsa didn't stutter.

" _I'm_ going to teach you how to be sweet to a girl!" Anna patted her chest with pride. "I'm going to show you how lovers interact until you're confident enough!"

"What?!" Elsa sputtered. "T-That's- I'm no—"

"I really don't get why you're nervous about dating. I mean if I were you, I can get anyone I want! You're smart, beautiful, gorgeous and totally hot! Not to mention, really kind and caring."

 _She called me beautiful, gorgeous, and hot. Ohgodohgodohgod!_ Elsa's heart rate picked up such a dramatic speed. She wasn't oblivious. She knew she wasn't ugly. But to hear Anna compliment her in such a way made her feel slightly nauseous. Thank god for the locker, she was able to support herself.

"I am _not_  nervous about dating!" Elsa denied. "I told you, I'm not interested. Besides, aren't you straight?! Why are you willing to pretend to be m-my g-g-girlfriend?!"

"Because you're my best friend." Anna simply answered, stretching out her hands and gesturing to her for emphasis. "I don't want you to miss out on a lot of things, Elsa. I know I've been broken a lot because of love, but I was also happy. I want you to experience the same thing."

Elsa remained silent. She knew that Anna's previous relationships weren't built on love, it was probably because of her ideals. If a guy looked good or was kind to her just once, Anna automatically thought that he was the right guy. It was not about love. She wouldn't be able to move on easily if it was. If Anna knew how painful love really was, Elsa doubted she'd ever want to fall.

Anna's reasons right now were absurd, but Elsa also knew that it was only her way of showing concern. Touched as she was for the thought, this wasn't the right way to do it. Without even going through with it, Elsa knew there was nothing good that will come out of this. If worse comes to worst, her feelings for Anna will forever be imprinted in her heart with absolutely no way of being erased. Pretending to be Anna's lover will only make her feel...  _urgh_.

"I told you that love comes naturally, Anna. I'll experience that someday. I don't think this is something we should do," Elsa rejected once more.

"It's not going to be forever. Maybe until you can find a girl you really like."

"W-What about if you find another prince charming?!"

Anna knew that she only needed to push a few more buttons until Elsa would agree. If she can ease all of Elsa's worries, she was sure that the blonde would think it through. Anna was simply worried about her best friend's love life. They were already young adults and not once had Elsa ever been in a relationship. Elsa was way too serious and already wasted her teenage years!

"You always worry about my love life, Elsa. Let me worry about yours now," Anna insisted. "Maybe a prince charming will come, but I did tell you to drag me away if I ever fall under the same spell, right?"

"That's- Anna, that's just weird!"

"Oh come on, Elsa, it's just me! We're just going to pretend! You know, until you get better or something? No feelings attached!"

It felt like a strike of lightning. A lance, a knife, or pretty much anything sharp. It was a twist in the gut, and Elsa's world practically crushed. She knew Anna could never see her that way, but not hearing any hint of hesitation when those words were spoken?

"Anna." Elsa inhaled sharply, the adrenaline rushing out of her body. "If you're only curious about how two girls date, do that experiment with someone else. I don't have time for useless escapades."

"It's not about that." Anna frowned, eyes glinting with hurt. "Do I look like someone who'd fool around when it comes to relationships?" Elsa raised an eyebrow, and Anna rolled her eyes. "Okay, I  _am_ curious. But I won't go around actually involving myself in one out of curiosity. What if the girl is serious about me and ended up getting hurt because I was just curious? I don't want that!"

Elsa wanted to scream, to tell Anna her real reason why she was against this. Anna was hurting her without even knowing.

"Look." Anna's frown softened and morphed into a gentle smile. "I just really want to help you. You sell yourself short, Elsa. You are the most amazing person I've ever known, and I don't understand how you can't see that."

"Like I said, I'm no—"

"I don't have any ill intentions. I know I'm loud and reckless, and I agree to go out with just about any guy who asked, but I'm not going to fool around when it comes to you. You're more than just any of those guys, and I won't trade you for anything in the world."

There was a painful warmth that spread across Elsa's chest. If only Anna knew what she was doing to her right now, would she stop saying these things?

"Come on, Elsa. Let me help. I promise we'll stop once you find someone you really like."

Elsa wanted to pull her own hair and ask how someone could be so dense and oblivious. She was thankful that Anna didn't know about her feelings, but these words coming out of her mouth hurt like no other. Elsa knew that she was worried, but still, Anna's suggestion was way too absurd.  _I already have someone I like and it's you_ , she inwardly groaned.

"Just think about it, okay?" Anna stepped closer to Elsa's personal space, and time seemed to stand still when a pair of soft lips touched the blonde's cheek. "See you later, Elsie." Anna winked playfully and excused herself, leaving Elsa standing still like a statue inside the locker room.

Elsa's cheeks tingled, stubbornly remembering the feel of those lips. It wasn't like Anna had never kissed her cheek before, but this kiss took the cake. Maybe it was because Anna practically suggested they pretend to be lovers just to 'help' her be more confident.

"Back again?" Belle asked, voice amused.

"Yeah." Elsa sighed and decided to busy herself with one of the punching bags again.

_What have I gotten myself into?_


	3. Heart Insurance

Elsa was sitting on one chair around the dining table, filling out a research paper that needed to be submitted by the end of the week while taking a sip of her coffee. She was confident that she could finish on time, but the redhead sitting across kept being a distraction.

"What?" Elsa finally asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You look so serious. Is that important?" Anna leaned closer to the table and eyed Elsa's papers suspiciously. She cringed. " _Ugh._  Too many words."

"It  _is_ a research paper." Elsa flipped through the pages again.

"Just draw something! A picture will always be worth more than a thousand words!"

"Not everyone is an artist like you, Anna. We don't do things the same way you do," Elsa explained while scribbling on her notes.

"How long are you going to do that?" Anna asked, ignoring Elsa's words.

"I don't know. I need to submit it by the end of this week."

Multitasking wasn't as difficult as it used to be, considering how long Elsa had known Anna. The redhead would always talk to her whether they were doing something or not; it wasn't something new. Growing up with Anna was enough to train her how to do multiple things at once.

"Don't you have other things to do?" Elsa asked when she noticed that Anna was just staring at her.

"I'm done." Anna shrugged and Elsa's jaw dropped. "It was just a one-minute animation, and you know how I'm used to drawing. I finished it yesterday."

"I see." Elsa nodded, impressed.

"Sooooo..." Anna bit her lower lip.

"What?"

"I was wondering if you thought about what I said."

"About what?"

"About dating," Anna bluntly stated. Elsa's hand stiffened, and she did her best not to run. Anna didn't ask her about it for a few days and honestly thought the girl already forgot about it.  _Guess not_ , she sighed inwardly.

Anna noticed how Elsa pressed her lips together. Throughout the years of being friends, she knew that it was a habit of the blonde whenever she would think about something  _really_ deep or stop herself from saying something. Based on the situation right now, it could be any of those two. Maybe even both. She couldn't understand why it was such a big deal. They were practically sisters; there was no need to be shy about each other!

"Here. I made a list of do's and don'ts when it comes to us dating... if you ever agree." Anna picked the paper she settled on the chair beside her and placed it in front of the blonde.

This picked Elsa's curiosity. It wasn't always that Anna planned things ahead. Preparing a list proved that she must have seriously thought this over. Although Elsa was still against the idea, she couldn't deny that this was definitely something new. For her, Anna had always been a 'go with the flow' kind of girl. She wasn't one for writing rules, let alone following them.

"Do... pet names?" Elsa felt her eyebrows twitched after reading the first rule.

"When you're in a relationship, the first thing to change is the way you call each other." Anna raised her index finger for emphasis. "It gives people the idea that you're officially together with someone and that you're off limits. It also gives your partner this special feeling of sweet possessiveness."

"But isn't that uncomfortable? If you're not used to being called something else aside from your name, wouldn't that be awkward?"

"True, but you'll get used to it over time. Besides, wouldn't you want to flaunt your girl to everyone? If you love her, you shouldn't be ashamed of her!"

It was taking every molecule of Elsa's being not to say anything. She wasn't ashamed of Anna at all. If only she could call the redhead hers officially in front of everyone, she'd do it. But if that was ever going to happen, she wanted it to be a real relationship, not some pretend.

"Don't... flirt with someone else." Elsa gave an affirmative sound because that was definitely something people shouldn't do while in a relationship. "How exactly am I going to be confident - as you'd like to put it - if I don't?"

"That's what you have  _me_ for! You're going to practice on me. I know you, Elsa. You can barely talk to strangers, let alone flirt with them!"

"So I'm going to flirt with you," Elsa said flatly.

"Yup! If you can't do it with me, you can't do it with someone else!"

If only she was  _just_ a friend, maybe it could work. The problem was that flirting with her was one of Elsa's biggest fantasies, but she never imagined it to happen because of something like this! She was almost sure she had a bigger chance when flirting with a stranger than with the love of her life!

"B-But, Anna! Flirting with you... I-It's weird?"

"Excuse me?!" Anna's eyes widened, pressing a hand against her chest in mock hurt. "Well, I'm sorry if I don't fit your ideal woman!"

"T-That's not it! I mean, w-we grew up together, Anna! That will be weird!"

"How come? Many childhood friends flirt with each other because they're that close. I know some who even became couples." Anna cocked her head. "It's not weird."

Elsa's breath caught on the back of her throat.  _She's talking about straight couples_ , she repeated inside her head. Deciding to give herself a break from the embarrassing topic, Elsa looked at the paper again. "Don't talk back because your partner is always right."

This had Elsa raising an eyebrow.

"A woman doesn't like it when they're being talked back on. When in a heated argument, they like it when their partner listens and don't fight back," Anna explained.

"What if she's wrong?"

"Elsa, women are  _always_ right."

"Maybe you forgot, but I'm a woman too. If by any chance, my partner is wrong and is trying to say that she's right,—"  _like what you're doing now._ "—naturally, I want to correct her."

"A lot of girls prefer it if you don't. At least not when they're angry." Anna shrugged. "You can try to talk, but if she's mad, don't ever try to explain anything. She. Won't. Listen."

 _Don't I know it_ , Elsa shot back in her head. Anna had never listened to anyone when she was angry. Although it was rare for the redhead to get mad at her, it wasn't ideal when it did happen. It was actually because of an argument that Elsa realized her feelings for the girl.

"Do... k-kiss... often..." Heat slowly crept up Elsa's cheeks as images of her and Anna kissing flashed before her eyes.

"I think that's self-explanatory. If we're going out, we have to kiss, right?"

"Anna! You're basically asking  _me_ to kiss  _you_! US! KISSING!"

"I'm aware, Elsa. I wrote that."

"T-That's... You  _have_ to be kidding me! How can you write something like this?!" Elsa gestured to the paper and stared at it in horror.

"You can't flirt, so that means you can't kiss too, right? I was the one who suggested this, and I'm well aware of it. The more realistic we act, the more you'll get used to it and get more confident over time." Anna settled her arms on top of the table with a huge grin on her face, satisfied with her own explanation.

Elsa was rendered speechless not by Anna's words but basically because she was still thinking about kissing Anna. Though, she was also aware of her own... inexperience when it came to kissing. She has no idea what to do or  _how_ to kiss someone. Every time she tried to imagine, it was always Anna with her inside her mind. Elsa couldn't finish the fantasy before dissolving into a pile of mush.

"Besides, you can't kiss someone unless you're comfortable around that person." Anna pointed out gently, the wide grin from before reducing into a gentle smile. "You  _are_ comfortable around me, right?"

"Y-Yeah." It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't completely true either. Elsa was comfortable around Anna when they weren't talking about love life. If the conversation led to that direction...

"If you're still worried, you can change any of those or add your own rule."

The last thing Anna wanted to do was to make Elsa feel uncomfortable around her. She admitted that kissing Elsa would definitely be out of the ordinary, but she wouldn't go as far as to call it weird. She preferred the term 'different' because, for her, Elsa wasn't weird. Besides, she was already comfortable around Elsa. Kissing her wouldn't be a problem. Not at all.

"But once you do..." Anna started carefully and waited until Elsa's eyes looked directly at her again. "It means you agree to all this. Us. Dating."

A lump lodged in Elsa's throat. It was a miracle that her body wasn't trembling when she can feel her nerves going haywire. Even though she hadn't been in any relationship before, she wouldn't deny that these were things that could  _possibly_ be real. Still, the idea of dating Anna because the redhead thought she was afraid of dating was absurd. She knew that whatever excuse she would come up with, Anna would simply ignore them. Even if she admitted that she had someone she liked, Anna would ask about said girl and will even go so far as to be a bridge for them.

Unless Elsa admitted that she was in love with her.

Swallowing thickly, Elsa picked up her pen and scanned the paper again. The side of Anna's lips twitched. That very action alone was enough to tell her that Elsa agreed. The only thing left was for Elsa to write the corrections or write a new rule. A subtle blush appeared on Elsa's apple cheeks and it was the most wonderful shade of pink she had ever seen by far.

After a few minutes of Elsa having a serious staring contest with what she wrote on the paper, she reluctantly offered it back to Anna. Anna slowly and carefully took the paper back and immediately looked for any corrections. There was none.

But there was one additional rule.

Rule #5: Don't fall in love.

Anna couldn't understand how to react. Elsa was blushing in front of her with her face screaming worried. Not to mention, this rule. Anna couldn't fight back her own giggle fits, feeling her heart swell when Elsa's cheeks reddened in a significant shade. This particular Elsa was simply adorable that she couldn't help adoring her.

"I don't think you have to worry about that," Anna promised.

The thought of her falling for Elsa was ridiculous. She admitted that Elsa was beautiful and the most wonderful person she'd ever met, but she had never thought of falling in love with her. That would be a huge struggle. Falling for her best friend and living under the same roof?  _Unless Elsa would fall for me too, that just sounds like pure torture_ , she thought to herself.


	4. Movie Date

Why did she agree to this? Was it because Anna wouldn't give up easily? Or because she wanted to know what it feels like to date her, even if pretended?

Elsa sighed.

"First things first." Anna slipped her hand on Elsa's, smoothly intertwining their fingers. "Elsie, you should hold me too!"

"W-What?"

"Your hand." Anna lifted their hands. "I can't be the only one holding you. You should hold me back."

Elsa couldn't say anything, her energy focused on not swooning because of the way Anna's soft hand fit perfectly on hers. She prayed to every God out there to make Anna oblivious to her sweaty palms when she obliged. It wasn't that they'd never held hands before. It only felt different now because they were on a date. A date which seemed... ordinary. They were in a movie theater, and, to be frank, they'd been to countless movie theaters before.

"Elsie, your hand is sweaty. You're too nervous," Anna giggled.

The movie was something Anna suggested, wanting to watch it with Elsa ever since the announcement months ago. Elsa had been busy lately and Anna didn't want to watch it with someone else. Besides, it was the perfect idea for a first date. Looking at the blonde beside her getting nervous, Anna tried her best to lessen the jitters and convince herself that if Elsa couldn't get comfortable around her, she was pretty much done when with the girl she liked.

Elsa's jaw dropped once she saw the poster that Anna was pointing at. "We're going to watch a cartoon?"

"It's an anime, Elsie, not a cartoon! And you're still calling me 'Anna'!"

"T-That's... But anime? Really?"

"It's a romantic-comedy and qualifies for a date, right?" Anna hummed while Elsa kept staring at the poster.

True to Anna's words, it did look like a love story... of a straight couple. It qualified as a date... for a straight couple.

"Fine." Elsa sighed and walked towards the ticket booth with Anna in tow.

Anna noticed how Elsa's mood changed, still looking uneasy but for a different reason. She didn't know that Elsa was trying to ignore the slight pang of hurt that lit up her veins. Elsa knew that Anna was straight and had always been one for being a hopeless romantic, hoping and dreaming for Mr. Prince Charming to arrive and sweep her off her feet.

"There's also  _yuri_  in this movie, you know?" Anna informed.

"What?" Elsa wasn't knowledgeable when it came to Anime. The fancy term Anna had uttered was lost to her.

"Nothing." Anna sing-sung and dragged Elsa to the confections. "Popcorn,  _love_?" she asked mischievously and noted how Elsa went as stiff as a board. "Elsa? Elsa!" Anna shook the blonde frantically.

"W-What?" Elsa stuttered.

" _Whew!_  I thought I lost you back there!" Anna glared with a pout. Elsa just stared at her like an idiot, incapable of being functional at the moment. Somehow, the sight had Anna breaking out into a laughing fit.

"What?" Elsa asked for the third time in a row.

It was difficult to get herself under control. It was ridiculously cute how Elsa could be shocked by simply being called 'love'. Anna didn't mean to be rude, but she wanted Elsa to get used to calling someone with a term of endearment and vice versa. If Elsa almost fainted while standing up, that just meant she needed more training than Anna had previously thought. Still, it was simply adorable.

"Okay, that's it. Call me something personal, Elsie," Anna demanded, feeling giddy when red bloomed from Elsa's cheeks.

"D-Do I have to?"

"We're dating now. Rule number one." Anna raised a finger with her free hand to remind Elsa of the rules they came up with. Elsa's throat bobbed up and down slowly, and Anna couldn't bite back a grin because she knew that the blonde was thinking of something.

"B-Ba...  _Babe_ ," Elsa said softly, Anna almost missed it.

It was Anna's turn to stiffen. Of all the pet names Elsa could come up with, it had to be 'babe'! This just sent both of them confused and incredibly awkward. Still, Anna couldn't stop herself from laughing again, only making the taller girl blush further.

"You know what, forget it." Elsa covered her face with her free hand.

"No, no! I just... wasn't expecting that from  _you_! I was just surprised! It's a good surprise!"

"Really?" Elsa asked sardonically.

"Mhm. I like it." Anna said more calmly this time. The confession made Elsa feel nervous once more. Slowly, she lowered her hand enough to see Anna's smiling face and—  _Is that a blush?!_

Elsa could feel the heat growing on her cheeks at the sight of a blushing Anna. The blonde swore that her own face could be beyond the shade of Anna's hair by now - the shorter girl  _had_ to see it. "I think I-I'll stick with your n-name."

"Nah-uh! Rule number one, Elsie! You agreed!" Anna pouted and jumped to where Elsa was looking at, purposely putting herself in Elsa's view. Elsa avoided her by looking somewhere below, but the redhead knelt in front of her. The blonde looked to her left and Anna stood there again. Their game of 'catch her eyes' went for a few minutes until Elsa finally sighed and looked at the redhead.

"Feistypants." Elsa huffed, making Anna blink.

A slight disappointment passed through the redhead when Elsa decided to change her pet name. She loved it when the blonde called her 'babe'. It made her feel special. Not that this new one doesn't, but there was something about the first one that felt... nice.

"Fair enough." Anna shrugged and pushed down whatever disappointment it was she felt. If Elsa was comfortable with the new one, so be it. 'Feistypants' could still pass as a term of endearment, right? No one had ever called her that but Elsa. In a way, it was also special.

* * *

Elsa couldn't understand what was interesting about watching romantic films. To her, it was cliché and unrealistic. The main characters were sweet and there was nothing going on. Either the guy was a jerk then turned into a good guy because of the girl, or the girl was shy and suddenly there was mister good guy to protect her. Sometimes she had to wonder if there was ever something original about these things.

"Anna, would you mind letting go?" Elsa's palms were sweaty because Anna had never let go since they started holding hands.

"Sorry, no can do. It's essential for couples to hold hands when in a theatre." Anna chewed on the popcorn she was eating.

"Is it? I think that's just clinginess. How on earth am I going to eat?" For Elsa, holding hands all the time was impractical. Maybe she really wasn't cut out for a relationship.

"Like this!" Anna grabbed around four pieces of popcorn and placed them in front of Elsa's lips. "Say aaaaah."

"I d-don't think tha- ngrh!" Elsa was cut off when Anna shoved the pieces of popcorn into her mouth.

 _Soft_ , Anna thought when her fingers lightly touched Elsa's lips. The shorter girl frowned, unable to understand what that sudden bolt of electricity was. "Delicious, right?" Anna asked, deciding to ignore the odd sensation.

"I think I have better chances eating with my own hand. If I let you feed me, I'll only end up eating around twenty pieces of that huge bucket of popcorn."

It wouldn't be much of a problem if only Anna would let go of her hand. Elsa couldn't use her right hand because she was holding her own drink. The hole in the arm of her chair was small to a point she couldn't settle the massive cup inside it. Of course, there was always the choice of placing the cup between her legs, but that doesn't sound too appealing.

"It's not my fault you ordered the biggest cup!" Anna giggled and took around five pieces again, offering it to Elsa once more. "And you're calling me 'Anna' again."

"I don't think we need to call each other pet names  _all_ the time." Elsa awkwardly took the popcorn into her mouth. This time, she didn't bother fighting back because she'd rather be the one to eat it than have Anna shove it in her mouth again.

"True. But knowing you, you'll never call me anything else but my name. We're dating, Elsie. You accepted."

Elsa blushed and thanked the theater for the dim lighting. She was sure that Anna couldn't see her face. It still hasn't sunk in that they were now dating. Sort of. She had mixed feelings about the entire thing, dating the girl she had been in love with since forever purely because Anna was 'helping' her become more confident.

On the other hand, Anna had been through a lot of relationships, but unbeknownst to Elsa, she was also feeling awkward about their arrangement. This was the first time she ever went out with a girl, and it had to be her best friend. Much like Elsa, she was completely clueless. All she knew was that girls wanted to be treated right, and she was confident that Elsa could do it. It was just that Elsa was totally shy and easily embarrassed.

"Elsie?" Anna coaxed and Elsa let out a soft 'hm' sound. "Did you remove your shoes or something?"

"What?" Elsa snapped her head to Anna in confusion.

"You totally did!" Anna accused.

Elsa was confused.  _What is she talking about? Remove my shoes? Why will I remove my shoes while I'm outside?_ Elsa was totally caught off guard, she couldn't even confirm nor deny Anna's accusations. It was a stupid idea. Removing her shoes while in a public place sounded absurd, unless there was a valid reason why.

"You shouldn't do that while inside the theater! It's carpeted here! I got a static earlier when I touched you." Anna sighed and grabbed a fistful of popcorn, shoving it all in her mouth. Meanwhile, Elsa just stared at her, shocked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rubbing the carpet with your feet while wearing socks may or may not build up an electric charge which can give you that satisfying 'zap' to shock someone with a static electricity. But the shock will only happen when done immediately! And you can't touch any metal or you won't be able to shock someone! Aside from yourself, that is. Anna thought that the electricity she felt when her fingers touched Elsa's lips while feeding her with popcorn was only because of that.


	5. What's The Difference?

Elsa was staring at Anna's hair that wasn't tied in twin braids. Anna's eyes were twinkling like stars, a hint of expectation written on her face. Elsa could feel like there was something about the particular change of look, and she absolutely knew what it was.

Anna had her hair trimmed.

She didn't want to comment because she didn't want to come off as creepy for noticing something small. However, the huge toothy grin and playful innocence radiating from Anna were enough to tell her  _that_ was exactly what the girl wanted her to notice.

"Not tied in braids today?" Elsa feigned ignorance.

"Obviously." Anna rolled her eyes before fixing Elsa with another hard stare.

"Why?"

" _Ugh!_ Is that all you noticed?!"

"Is there something else?"

"I had my hair trimmed!"

That was the cue. Elsa walked closer to the pouting girl and examined her hair. "Riiiight. How was I supposed to notice that?"

"A lot of girls love it when their lover notice  _any_ subtle change. You're smart and observant, Elsie. I can't believe you didn't notice my hair," Anna huffed.

"For one, those twin braids stand out. It's the most obvious change. Naturally, that's what I'll notice first." Elsa shrugged and went back to the sofa. "And I also noticed you became rounder."

"What?!" Anna squeaked.

Anna immediately looked at herself and shook her arm to see if they jiggle. The sight alone made Elsa laugh boisterously. Anna knew that if Elsa was laughing without hiding it behind her hand, it was really funny. The redhead frowned and rubbed her temples in frustration.

"That's  _not_ something you should comment on! Never! Ever! Tell a girl that she's getting fat!" Anna hissed through gritted teeth, but with how Elsa laughed, it told her she wasn't getting through. The blonde clenched her sides and slammed the sofa with her free hand in pure elation.

Anna couldn't understand why she couldn't get angry at this woman. It wasn't always that Elsa would laugh so much that she forgot her own composure.

"You... you-  _ugh!_  Why are you so sexy?!" Anna growled. "You should seriously stop that gym! I can't tell you that you're getting fat!"

Elsa stopped laughing, her face heating up upon hearing the casual way Anna called her 'sexy'. In reality, Elsa didn't need the exercise to maintain her figure because she already had a good metabolism and also eats healthy. That gym was only because she needed to vent. To think that Anna would like her figure to a point she'd call her  _sexy_...

"Well, maybe you should exercise too." Elsa forced out through her dry throat.

"Maybe I should," Anna agreed. "If I go with you, maybe I can observe Belle. I should take notes on what she likes on a girl! Actually, I think she already likes you. Maybe we should make her jealous?" She picked up Elsa's pen on top of the coffee table and grabbed one paper to jot things down.

"What?" Elsa asked, astonished. "No, no, no! I told you I'm not interested in her! It doesn't matter if you think she likes me, I don't like her!"

"Really? Why not? She looks pretty—"  _But you're beautiful._ "—and kind."  _You're gentle,_  Elsa shot back in her head. "You could be a good match."

"Anna, we've already talked about this. I don't look for love; it finds me." Elsa pinched the bridge of her nose. "It's true I prefer girls, but it doesn't mean I like just  _any_ girl."

"If you say so." Anna tapped Elsa's pen on her chin. "What do you look for in a girl anyway? Maybe I could introduce you to someone."

"Sometimes, who you fall for isn't the one you asked for. It doesn't matter if she doesn't fit my preferences, as long as I love her, that's all that matters."

There was something about the way Elsa said it that Anna couldn't quite decipher. She doesn't know why, but her lips curved into a tiny smile. Knowing that her best friend wasn't the type to judge anybody, it made her feel warm and fuzzy all over. Indeed, whoever Elsa fell in love with was the luckiest girl on earth.

If only no such girl existed...

Anna's eyes widened at her own thoughts.  _No, no, no! Bad, Anna! Bad!_ The redhead clutched Elsa's pen tightly as she tried to understand where such thoughts came from. It was unacceptable to not wish her best friend a good love life. That was unfair. Maybe she was just worried? She was probably just afraid that no girl would take Elsa seriously. Yeah, that was probably it!

In that case, she has to make Elsa irresistible. That way, no one will be able to let her go. Elsa was already a perfect person, but was she a perfect girlfriend? Anna wasn't sure. They only went on a date once and even  _that_  was as if they were just friends. How can she make Elsa good in relationships?

Anna looked at Elsa who was now confused at the sudden attention. There was something whirling inside the redhead's stomach that made her uneasy. They were in a pseudo-relationship, but what was the difference between girl friends and girlfriends? Clinging on to each other was considered normal for girls, so what made them different? What was the distinguishing line between girl friends and girl lovers?

Simple.

Mustering all courage she had, Anna stood and walked towards the blonde. She stretched her arms and gently placed her hands on the sofa, practically locking Elsa in between. She stared intently at the blonde's eyes, later on snapping them to Elsa's red lips.

Elsa's breath caught on the back of her throat. Unintelligent things ran inside her head. Anna was close. So close. Anna smelled like pine and strawberries. Elsa never said it before, but she absolutely loved it when the shorter girl's hair wasn't tied in braids, and that was exactly how Anna's hair was at that very moment. Her childhood friend, best friend, and pseudo-girlfriend.  _Ohgod_.

"Elsie... Let's kiss."

* * *

Anna was nervous. She never thought that the idea of kissing someone could be that unnerving for Elsa. So much so that she fainted. Like,  _really_ fainted. Anna wasn't as strong as Elsa so she settled with carefully laying the blonde on the sofa and placing a blanket she took from her room over her.

As Anna waited for Elsa to come back to her senses, she took the time to draw her favorite model: Elsa.

Anna knew that the blonde wasn't used to being drawn or have someone taking a picture of her. However, she also knew Elsa like she knew herself. Elsa's hair, eyes, nose, lips - she memorized it all. Still, drawing Elsa while she was in front of her took the prize. It wasn't always she was allowed to do it. Elsa would always freak out whenever she tried.

"You're really beautiful," Anna whispered, knowing full well that her words went unheard.

The silence in the room made Anna wonder about the previous thought she had. She couldn't understand why she acted like a possessive friend. She was aware that Elsa was an amazing girl and that people deserved to know about it, but somehow, it made her feel bad.  _Stupid, stop it!_ Anna shook her head frantically to rid herself of such thoughts.

Anna placed the sketchpad and pencil down when she saw Elsa move a little. Worrying for the blonde, she knelt down beside her and waited until those pale eyelids flutter open, revealing a wonderful pair of icy blue eyes. "You okay?" Anna asked.

"Y-Yeah." Elsa stuttered, and then she cleared her throat before hoisting herself up into a sitting position. "Sorry, what happened?"

"I want to ask the same thing! You fainted!"

"Oh. S-Sorry, must've been tired." Elsa rubbed her temples.

"Let me." Anna sat beside the blonde and removed Elsa's hands on her forehead, replacing it with her own.

"Anna, I can do it." Elsa tried to remove Anna's hands but ended up sitting like a meek potato when Anna glared at her.

Satisfied, Anna continued. "You should take a rest once in a while, you know? You're too busy with school and you even exercise during your free time. You're tired."

"I'm used to it."

"Maybe, but I still worry about you," Anna insisted. "Do you really have to continue that gym? You can just stretch around here, right? Yoga?"

Elsa wanted to say it. To tell Anna that staying at home was difficult, but she couldn't. She knew that Anna would get hurt. But if she admitted her feelings, it could change their relationship forever. That gym was the only place where she couldn't see Anna. Sort of. There was no memory of Anna there save for that time when the shorter girl visited her.

"I... might take a break for a while... from the gym," Elsa muttered. Anna beamed and immediately tackled her into a huge bone-crushing hug, sending them both lying down on the sofa with Anna on top of her.

_Ohmygod! Anna is on top of me! She's so soft and small and soft and soft a- calm down, Elsa!_

But she can't.

Anna's fragrance captivated her, and the way she felt soft and just the right weight sent Elsa's heart flying in sky high. She gripped the cover of the sofa and tried to convince herself not to let go because she was sure she'd wrap Anna inside her arms.

Meanwhile, Anna was also in her own little world. Elsa's body felt impossibly soft and hard at the same time. It was perfectly toned, it felt nice. Her sweet and incredibly exquisite scent of mint and vanilla was one of the many things Anna loved about her. Not even her own mother's fragrance could calm her down like Elsa's does.

"Good," Anna managed to say out loud.

"O-Okay! Anna, get off! I know I'm exercising, but you're heavy!"

"Hey!" Anna pushed herself up but didn't let go of their positions, skillfully locking Elsa in between her legs. "I told you never tell a girl that she's fat or heavy! Aren't you a girl too? You should know that!"

"I get it! J-Just... I-I need water!" Elsa squeaked and tried to wiggle so Anna would get off, but no. Anna rendered her unable to move.

"Ask me properly..." Anna leaned closer to Elsa's ear. "... _babe_."

Elsa's heart burst at the contact of Anna's lips on her ear.  _Oh god! That was... wow._ She couldn't even find any word to describe it. Anna called her 'babe', and she loved it. It was enough to create this fluttery feeling inside her chest, along with the heat accumulating inside her stomach.

Anna wasn't any different. Calling Elsa 'babe' felt wonderful. She absolutely loved it when she felt an intense heat radiating from Elsa's face. Admittedly, she never called anyone 'babe' before. She had lots of boyfriends, but none of them were ever called that. She had no idea it would roll out of her tongue easily.

"A-Anna," Elsa whispered. Anna let out a soft 'hm' sound, pushing herself off just a little bit, enough so their faces were just an inch apart.

If Elsa decided to get this over with, to kiss Anna, she could simply push her head up a little. If Anna decided to get this 'practice' kissing off the way, she can just lean down a tiny bit. It would be too easy.

But no one dared move. There was a tension in the air that neither of them could understand. For Elsa, it was because the girl she was in love with was on top of her. For Anna, she really doesn't know. In fact, she has no idea what she was doing or where the hell that confidence from earlier came from.

"I... I want to drink some water, b-ba-babe," Elsa whispered, and if Anna wasn't mistaken, she swore she saw those pupils dilate.

"Y-Yeah, sure." Anna removed herself from on top of Elsa and watched as the girl stood up too, her face as red as a tomato. It made Anna's stomach whirling. "You know, I think I'm hungry too." She shrugged and sauntered to the kitchen.


	6. Sweet Talk

They were having a comfortable afternoon, watching a movie in their living room with huge mugs of hot chocolate and biscuits on top of the coffee table, when Anna popped a random question.

"Am I really getting fat?"

"What?" If Elsa was drinking her hot chocolate, she could've spurted it out when she saw Anna jiggling her arms again.

"You said I was heavy. Am I really getting fat?" Anna disliked the idea of exercising, but she most definitely didn't want to be fat. She was a lazy bum, but she cared about her figure.

"You're still thinking about that?"

"If there's someone I trust to be honest with me, it's you. You said I was heavy. Were you serious?" Anna bit her lower lip, almost looking like she didn't want to hear the blunt response.

Elsa couldn't find the right words to say. It was true that Anna gained weight, but it only made her figure better. A skinny Anna was nice, but this particular Anna was better. Not to mention, Elsa made careful precautions in regards to what they eat. She knew that Anna wasn't a huge fan of exercise, and that was why she cooked balanced meals every day.

"Yes, but you look good. Better than skinny you."

"B-But my weight!" Anna pinched her body, looking for any kind of excess skin. "I don't want to get fat!"

"You're not."

"You just said I got fat!" Anna pointed out, and Elsa knew then that they would only run around in circles. "What am I going to do? What if I become as huge as that old man living by the end of the street? People will make fun of me!"

"Anna, you're exaggerating." Elsa raised both hands to placate the redhead. "I said you became rounder, but it doesn't mean you're huge. You were skinny when we moved in, and you gaining weight is a good thing."

A subtle blush bloomed on Anna's cheeks. Worry was evident on her face and Elsa couldn't understand why. To her, there wasn't any need to worry because Anna was perfect the way she was. There was no need to panic over gaining little weight.  _Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned anything about it_ , she sighed inwardly.

"Will you still love me even if I get chubby? If I get as huge as that old man, will you still love me, Elsie?"

"Where is this coming from?" Elsa raised a curious brow. Of course, she would still love Anna no matter how fat she was. She couldn't just say it, though. Mostly because her love was different from the one Anna has for her.

"Because if you can't accept me, no one else will," Anna whined before settling herself on top of Elsa's lap. "Am I heavy?"

"Wh-Wha- Anna, you're sitting. On me."

"I know. I'm asking if I feel heavy to you." Anna explained, oblivious of the worry spinning in Elsa's head. She turned her head and shot adorable puppy eyes at the blonde. "Well? Do I?"

Elsa's heart started flopping around like a fish. Anna was sitting on her lap, and it was absolutely perfect. She wasn't light, but she wasn't heavy either. For Elsa, she was just the right weight. It was definitely better than the time she had carried Anna to her own room after her breakup with Hans.

"We have a weighing scale," Elsa deadpanned.

"I know, but I want to know if I feel heavy to  _you_ ," Anna repeated, voice mildly irritated.

If Elsa said that she was, Anna would make it her life mission to lose some added weight. She didn't want Elsa to think that she was munching on snacks, even if it was true. She had been eating quite a lot recently, but that was also Elsa's fault! She kept cooking delicious food and even buying chocolates! How can she not get fat?

"Just a little, but it's fine. I don't mind." Elsa tried her best to focus on the movie she had no idea what about was anymore. She was too distracted by the girl sitting on her lap to think about anything else.

Then, Anna leaned all her weight on her. Strawberry blonde hair tickled her neck, but she couldn't bring herself to laugh. She was having a hard time believing what was going on, especially when Anna guided one of her hands and placed it on top of her belly.

"What are you...?" Elsa stuttered. It wasn't a complete sentence, but that was the best she could do.

"Elsie, you feel comfortable!" Anna giggled and with the position they have, Elsa could see a subtle blush on the redhead's ears. "Thank you," Anna whispered, and something about her tone snapped Elsa back to reality.

"F-For what?" Elsa asked, worried about the sudden change of the mood.

"For calling me fat and saying that you don't mind." Anna tilted her head upwards to look at Elsa's eyes, proving that her cheeks were indeed red. "I don't know why, but if it's you saying it... I just know you're telling the truth. That you really won't mind even if I get chubbier."

Elsa was having a hard time fighting back her blush. It was already one thing that they were in this position, but to hear Anna say these things? Elsa was used to Anna being blunt, but it always managed to catch her off guard. Why was it that Anna can say her feelings easily? If only Elsa could be just as honest. At that moment though, all words left her and she couldn't say anything but a soft 'hm'. Anna didn't seem to mind because she just settled her head on Elsa's neck again, quietly watching the movie.

At least that was what Elsa thought.

Anna couldn't concentrate. For some reason, seeing Elsa's blushing face made her mind spin around in circles. Especially like this, where Elsa's soft hand was settled on top of her belly. Even if it was her who forced it, she still felt protected. It was odd because Elsa wasn't doing anything to make her feel that way. She was just there, letting her do whatever she wanted with her hand.

"So... When will you jump on me?"

Elsa's eyes almost popped out of their sockets upon hearing Anna's question. "What?!"

"When will you initiate contact with me?" Anna tilted her head upwards to meet Elsa's frantic eyes with her own piercing ones. She knew that Elsa was awkward about flirting, but she had to be blunt. If she didn't, they wouldn't get anywhere. "When will you hug me? Feed me? When will you... kiss me?"

Elsa stopped breathing. She didn't expect Anna to ask about that. It didn't help much that the girl was sitting on her lap, practically locking her in place.  _Did she do it on purpose?_ If it was Anna, it was highly possible.

"T-That's... one step at a time, Anna."

"Problem is that you're not taking any step," Anna pointed out, tightening her hold on Elsa's hand. "You get so nervous and I feel like I should push you to take that first step."

 _You're doing a good job_ , Elsa admitted inwardly. "I'm not used to it, Anna, you know that," she said. "A-And kissing is... That's not something childhood friends normally do! D-Do we really have to do that? Isn't that going too far?"

"Yes, we have to," Anna stated firmly. "It's one of the rules you agreed to, but because I love you, I'm willing to put the kiss on the lips on hold for now."

"For now?"

"For now," Anna repeated before the side of her lips curled upwards. "But only the one on the lips. It might be too much since you're not used to it so I have an idea!"

Elsa didn't want to ask because she knew that it was going to be something ridiculous. When Anna comes up with an idea, it always meant trouble for her.

"Ugh. Come on, Elsie! Ask me!" Anna pouted. Elsa pursed her lips tight, set on not asking. She knew Anna wanted her to, but she absolutely refused to do it. At least until Anna decided to shoot puppy eyes at her. With that, Elsa felt her determination crumble to dust.

Sighing in defeat, Elsa relented. "What is it?"

Elsa was expecting the redhead to say something, but she didn't. Not yet. Instead, she adjusted on Elsa's lap and wrapped her loving arms around her neck, turquoise eyes locking on to icy blues. They were so close and Elsa was having a hard time looking away. The heat radiating from Anna, her captivating scent, mesmerizing eyes, and the intimacy they have at that moment... She didn't want to break it.

"Kiss me anywhere you want."

They were so close, almost like that time when Anna first asked her to kiss. Elsa admitted that with the way Anna was acting, she was slowly getting tempted. But no. Even when Anna was giving her permission, she didn't want to do it simply because she loved her. She didn't want to enjoy kissing and touching Anna when she knew that the redhead was genuinely trying to 'help' her out. To her, it felt like she was taking advantage of the situation.

"You're being reckless, Anna." Elsa sighed. "How can you just ask me something like that? Do you go around telling all your previous lovers that?"

"I don't." Anna frowned. "I don't go around seducing people, okay? Even  _I_ am not that desperate! I'm only like this with you because I'm comfortable. If I come off as desperate, then fine, I'll stop." She stood up and took the place beside the blonde.

Elsa immediately regretted her statement, not only because she missed the contact and the proximity, but because Anna looked genuinely hurt. She didn't mean to be rude. She knew that Anna wasn't that kind of girl, but she couldn't help it. She didn't know how Anna acted with her previous boyfriends. With the way Anna was acting as a girlfriend to her, Elsa had the wildest guesses ever. It was unsettling to think that Anna could have asked the same things from those guys.

Maybe it was because she had hurt Anna, but Elsa found herself adjusting on her seat. She didn't know what kind of courage shot through her, but contrary to how much she was against the idea before, she cupped Anna's cheeks and placed a soft, gentle kiss on her forehead.

"I'm sorry," Elsa whispered and pressed their foreheads together. "I... I'm sorry."

"I'm hurt, Elsie," Anna whimpered, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "You should know me better than that."

"I know," Elsa admitted apologetically and pulled Anna closer for a hug, placing another kiss on her forehead. "I'm sorry."

Anna hated how Elsa assumed she had asked that from her exes. She couldn't even imagine sleeping with any of them, let alone tell them to kiss her anywhere they want. She knew it was a reckless statement, but she also knew that Elsa wouldn't do anything rash. She trusted Elsa, and it hurt to hear those words from her. But with every apology and kisses, Anna could feel her anger and pain slowly fade away. Elsa's comforting actions were all sincere that it just made her want to... melt?


	7. Crazy Rush

Elsa let her eyes roam over the body of the bubbly and cheerful girl standing in their living room. "You're going to jog?"

"Mhm." Anna nodded. "I know you said you don't mind, but I still think I could use to lose some extra weight. I don't know..." she said, poking her fingers together.

Anna didn't exactly know why she wanted to jog around. It was as if the idea randomly popped into her head, and that was how most of her ideas happen anyway. Only this time, even she was shocked that her mind decided to give her the urge to exercise. She tried to convince herself that she didn't need it because Elsa said she looked fine, but, oddly enough, she couldn't do it. She knew she was going to eat tons again, and the idea of getting chubbier than now sent a despicable shock to her entire being.

"You're not heavy, Anna," Elsa repeated, feeling conflicted. She should be happy that Anna wanted to live healthily, but her reasons weren't right.

"I know. It's just... I get the urge to? Like my mind just said 'go and exercise' or something!"

"Just like that?"

"Just like that." Anna nodded in affirmative. "But I don't want to do it in a gym! That place is secluded and it smells like sweat!"

"So you're going to jog outside..."

"Yup! I'm going to try it outside. And since I was the one who stopped you from going to the gym, I want you to come with me!"

Of course, Elsa wouldn't mind joining, but she was worried about the redhead's state of mind. Being too conscious of one's body couldn't be healthy. She didn't know why Anna was worried. It was true that she would complain about her figure before, but she didn't do anything about it. She didn't have the urge to try and do something about it.

"I don't mind, but are you sure? You might get tired easily."

"I won't know until I try. I've never tried it before, so we wouldn't know, right? What if I don't get tired? Come on, Elsie, let's go! I wanna talk while jogging!"

 _You'll get tired_ , Elsa sighed inwardly. Anna had never exercised before and she was willing to bet that in less than ten minutes, the girl would already whine about her legs turning into jelly. Elsa crossed her arms and smirked. "I'm not sure if talking and jogging go hand in hand for a beginner."

"Are you mocking me? " Anna gasped. "Fine! I'll go jog by myself! If I don't come back, just know that you carry me in your conscience! Forever!"

Instead of panicking, Elsa could only smile. Despite everything that she said, Anna only stood there pouting like a child. It was funny and adorable at the same time. She knew that Anna was only trying to guilt trip her into coming along and that she wasn't really angry.

"Okay, sure. I'll see you later." Elsa shrugged.

"Elsie!" Anna quickly hooked her arms around Elsa's. "Come on! Pleaaaaase? Don't you miss jogging? You do that on a treadmill, right? Don't you want to try it outside with Mother Nature? With me?"

Elsa couldn't suppress a huge toothy grin. Maybe she was spoiling Anna too much, but who could blame her? "Fine," Elsa sighed, trying to sound like she was forced to do it and ruffled Anna's hair, purposely treating her like a child. "I'll just get changed. Wait for me." She left the girl in the living room.

Anna's face scrunched up. Elsa ruffled her hair and she should be angry for being treated like a child, but she wasn't. There was just this fluttery feeling inside her entire being that she couldn't recognize. It was... new and overwhelming. She wasn't sure, but there was one thing clear.

Her face grew hotter the longer she waited for Elsa to come back.

* * *

Anna was short on breath and was already wobbling on her legs. Still, she couldn't stop. Having Elsa jog in front of her stirred her inner competitive nature, and she didn't want to lose. It was a ridiculous thought because Elsa was way more in shape than she was, but the sight of Elsa's slender figure, wearing a tank top and short shorts which shape her beautiful bu–  _I did not think of Elsa's butt!_  Anna blinked and tried to jog faster.

Elsa turned around and skillfully jogged backward. "You're so slow!"

All too suddenly, Anna's heart skipped for a different reason than exhaustion. She knew it wasn't because of that since it only happened when Elsa turned around. Why? She didn't know, but it sure was happening a lot lately: skipping heartbeats.

"I'm not a health lunatic like you!" Anna managed to say in between gasps. "And you're going too fast! I said I want to jog with you, but you're way too ahead!"  _Not that I didn't have a nice view o– wait, what?!_  Okay, maybe she was starting to hallucinate.

Elsa noticed how Anna would often shake her head, and it made her wonder if it was because Anna's vision was getting blurry. "Let's take a break over there." Elsa pointed to one of the benches and Anna responded with a sigh. She was red in the face and looked extremely tired, but, to Elsa's surprise, she wasn't complaining. Maybe she was really serious about staying fit?

When Elsa jogged her way towards the bench, Anna locked her eyes on that body again. Specifically, at Elsa's legs. They seem to go on and on and were so white and flawless. She wasn't a stranger to the reality that some guys and even girls would turn their heads to her best friend, and it made her blood boil just thinking about it. She knew that Elsa was beautiful, but she didn't like it when people ogled her.

Not that she wasn't.

Elsa had the height and the body. Even the beauty and brains! She was also kind and gentle and sweet and- How can someone be so perfect? It wasn't like Anna was jealous. If anything, she was glad that they weren't alike. At least they got to experience new things together. She loved sharing a lot of her firsts with Elsa, and she absolutely loved it when she was also Elsa's first in many things.

 _Why am I thinking about this anyway?_  Anna snorted and forced her way to the bench where Elsa was waiting, feeling a sense of pride when she noticed some of the people shooting daggers at her when Elsa offered a bottle of water.

"Are you okay?" Elsa chuckled lightly as Anna took big gulps from the bottle. A part of her was worried about how sweaty and red the girl was, but she was also impressed. It was the first time she had seen Anna not give up halfway when it came to exercise.

"FWUAAAH!" Anna gasped. "Ugh. So tired."

"You actually did great. You didn't even stop for a bit."

"I had a motivation," Anna waved a hand and noticed that Elsa wasn't drinking anything. She frowned and shove the bottle to the blonde. "You're not drinking!"

"It's fine. I'm not tired." Elsa waved a hand, but Anna insisted. "Anna, I'm alright."

"You have to drink! What's the break for if you don't?" Anna opened the bottle. "Come on, Elsie. I can't be the only one drinking! I know you're more in shape than I am, but you also sweated a lot."

Elsa darted her eyes between the bottle and Anna. She admits that she needed to drink, but sharing it with a beautifully flushed redhead made her hesitate. She had seen Anna flushed before, but this was one shade that always made her heart race faster than the other times. This time, Anna was sweating and breathing heavi–  _Wait! No, no, no! Stop that!_

With a silent inhale, Elsa took the bottle from Anna and instantly felt pressure on her shoulders when Anna watched her every move.  _Do it naturally_ , she told herself. She swallowed once and raised the bottle up to her lips. She hated to admit it, but her thoughts were unbecoming of a woman. Knowing that she was now drinking from the bottle that Anna had drunk from earlier... Was she a high school boy or what?!

But it wasn't only her.

Watching Elsa drink from the same bottle made something in Anna snap. Especially when that long white flawless skin of a neck kept bobbing up and down slowly with each gulp. There was something about it that Anna couldn't put her finger on.

"You're so hot..."

It was a random comment that made Elsa spurt out the water she was drinking. She was already having a hard time ridding herself of such thoughts - Anna just had to say something like that! Her face grew hotter and hotter as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

"W-What?!"

"Oh." Anna blinked and tapped her chin with her index finger. "Did I say that out loud?"

Elsa could only stare at her with her mouth hanging agape. She knew that Anna had a bad habit of blurting things out, but what shocked her more was that Anna was actually thinking about something along those lines. Anna had called her 'hot' casually before, but to say it without adding anything to it? What was she thinking?!

"Yes. Yes, you did," Elsa assured and closed the water bottle.

"I see." Anna sighed while stretching her limbs. "Well, it's true anyway. Might as well just let you know."

"Y-Y-You... you just called me 'hot'."

"I know right?"

Why on earth was Anna thinking about her being hot? What triggered it? And to blurt it out? That just meant that Anna was deep in thought! Thoughts about...  _me?_  Elsa's heart skipped a beat at the possibility of that. She knew it could be a far-fetched dream of hers, but she also knew Anna. She would only blurt things out when she was thinking hard about something, her emotions couldn't keep up.

"I think a lot of people think the same. I mean, lots of them keep staring at you."

"T-That's... That's unsettling. N-Not you, but them." Elsa cringed because she wasn't oblivious to the fact that people would look at her. She decided to ignore it, but to hear it from Anna just made it even more real. "You know I don't like it when people stare."

"But it's alright if I do?"

"As if you would stop if I told you not to," Elsa pointed out with a short breathy chuckle. She was used to Anna staring at her and stopped minding years ago. That was just how Anna was.

"Touché." Anna giggled before leaning her head on Elsa's shoulder. "I'm tired, Elsie."

"Rest. I'll stay with you." Elsa leaned her head on Anna's. "But you'll probably be sore if you fall asleep now. If not, then you will be tomorrow."

"Ugh. And here I thought you're starting to be romantic." Anna playfully swatted Elsa's tummy, earning a giggle. "But seriously, my poor legs are tired."

"Do you want to go home?"

"I don't think I can move another step. Maybe sitting down wasn't a good idea." Anna sat straight and that was when Elsa noticed that her braids were getting loose. She watched as the girl tried to stand on shaky legs. "Yup... bad idea," Anna groaned and sat on the bench again.

Elsa felt something warm spread from within her. She had seen Anna try many things before and even enjoyed them all, but the redhead was never excited about the idea of exercising. Seeing Anna try to do something she hated and didn't give up halfway was new and unfamiliar. Almost as if she was seeing a side of the girl that she hadn't seen before.  _Maybe this isn't so bad_ , she thought to herself.

Elsa stood from the bench and knelt in front of Anna, prodding her to ride on her back. "Get on."

"W-What?!"

"I'm carrying you home. We jogged all the way from the apartment."

"I-I know that! But why are you carrying me?" Anna asked with a lump in her throat. Out of nowhere, her mind started formulating images of her riding on Elsa's back. It was appealing as it was embarrassing.

"You can barely stand, Anna. Come on, I'll carry you."

"B-But I'm heavy!" Anna shrieked and covered her mouth when people looked at her. Her face blew up into a furious blush at the admission and embarrassment, but mostly because the images inside her head kept piling up one after another.

"I told you, I don't mind." Elsa stood up, and Anna was about to sigh in relief, but then Elsa placed a hand on her back and the other on her legs.

"W-Wait! Wait! Stop!" Anna pleaded. "T-There's no need to carry me. I-I mean that's... You carrying me back- Aren't you embarrassed to be seen like that?"

Elsa's heart swelled at Anna's consideration. It might be embarrassing, but she didn't care. People might start looking at them weird and maybe someone would take a picture, but it doesn't matter. She only cared about how exhausted Anna was to walk.

"I wouldn't offer my help if it was embarrassing, Anna," Elsa pointed out gently. "Now if you're embarrassed about riding on my back, I'd carry you like this. It's your choice."

Imagining Elsa carrying her bridal style made Anna a blubbering mess. She was conscious of her weight, but at that moment, she was more worried that it was Elsa who would carry her. She was conscious about it... and she didn't know why.

"B-Back," Anna weakly demanded.

Elsa smiled and knelt down in front of Anna again, prodding her to ride on her back once more. With a trembling body, Anna leaned down and pressed herself against Elsa's back. Just when she thought that her heart couldn't race any faster, it did. It was vastly new and scary; she didn't know what to do with herself. Elsa was already carrying her and she couldn't really run away.

"I-I'm not heavy, am I?"

"No. You're fine, Anna."


	8. Beside You

Elsa settled her phone on top of the dining table, glad that she had everything arranged. She doesn't usually take a day off from school, but today was an exemption. She was right regarding Anna becoming sore. The usually bright and cheerful redhead was now gloomy and apathetic. Anna had tried to convince her not to skip school, but that was never an option when Anna was sick.

"Elsieeeeee."

Elsa's head snapped to the side to see Anna leaning on the wall. "Wha- Why are you up?" Elsa ran towards Anna fast enough to be able to catch her in time when she nearly fell over. "I told you to stay in bed."

"I know, but I can't just let you skip school," Anna insisted, frowning halfheartedly. "It's just fatigue! Okay, and maybe I do have a mild fever, but it's not life threatening! You didn't have to stay."

"I can't just leave you alone when you can barely stand. How can you eat? What if you want to get something far from your room? If you crave for something? Do you seriously think you can walk around in that state?"

Anna cringed at every question that was uttered, knowing how right Elsa was. "I'm touched. My girlfriend took a day off from school because I can't move." Anna wiped away invisible tears. "Maybe I should've tried jogging way earlier than yesterday," she mumbled under her breath.

"Anna," Elsa warned.

Anna could only shoot a small smile. Even when she tried to be comical about it, she was honestly thankful that Elsa stayed. But she also felt guilty. She was just exhausted, but the blonde was making a big deal out of it! If they were still in high school, one day off from school wouldn't be a huge loss, but college was different!

"Come on. Let's get you to bed." Elsa held Anna's arm and was about to carry her when the girl raised her free hand as a sign to stop.

"It's okay, I can stand," Anna promised.

Elsa, still feeling skeptical, guided Anna up and tried her best to support her. She fought the urge to carry the girl back to her own room, knowing full well that Anna had to at least try to walk around on her own to relax the muscles.  _I knew I should've let her rest after ten minutes_ , she mentally berated herself.

"Thanks," Anna sighed as soon as Elsa helped her lie down on her bed.

"Tell me if you need anything, okay?" Elsa placed a blanket on top of her.

"I still think you should go."

"Well," Elsa drawled, lightly moving a stray hair from Anna's face and pushing it back to her ear. "Isn't it normal for me to worry about my girl?"

It was supposed to be a friendly teasing remark. Something to say as a response to Anna's earlier statement. It was an innocent question, but it sent a bolt of electricity through both of them. For Elsa, it was because she had always longed to call Anna hers. She had always fantasized about it, but admittedly, she never did anything for it to happen. She was afraid to even try. As for Anna, she couldn't understand why, but hearing it from Elsa made her heart race the same way it did when Elsa carried her back to their apartment.

Elsa's girl.

Anna was thankful that her hands were underneath the blanket. At least it went unnoticed when she gripped her sheets for dear life as she engaged herself in a staring contest with Elsa. There was a subtle blush on the blonde's cheeks and, for some reason, it made her feel nervous. Why was she nervous? This woman in front of her was Elsa. There was no need to be nervous, but she was.

" _Now_  you're acting like one." Anna broke out into a giant grin and was surprised that her voice didn't crack despite the way her heart threatened to burst out of her ribs.

"Was that good?" Elsa broke out into a tiny lopsided smile. That moment of silence between them took a huge toll on her. She was afraid that Anna would react violently, but to her delight and relief, Anna only complimented her.

"Maybe. Caring girlfriend? Sounds nice." Anna tightened her hold on her sheets. "I feel lucky."

Elsa's heart swelled at the way Anna just said it. She kept reminding herself that this wasn't real, but her emotions betrayed her mind. The way Anna would look at her with that subtle blush, smile, and even the look in her eyes.  _I'm the one who feels lucky_ , she thought.

"Elsie?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you lay down with me?" Anna asked, pinkish cheeks darkening crimson. "I... I feel comfortable when I'm with you... b-but maybe it's not a good idea? I-I do have a mild fever and you might get sick..."

"I exercise on a regular basis. I don't get sick easily," Elsa gently informed. "I don't mind, but are you sure?" Anna's grip tightened on her sheets and she couldn't bring herself to speak. All she could do was purse her lips tight and nod once. "Okay," Elsa said with a gentle smile.

Anna doesn't get it. Whatever was going on inside her, it was overwhelming and she couldn't speak. She used to be frank all the time, especially with Elsa. She would always ramble nonstop, but she couldn't do it now. It felt like words left her, and the only thing she could do was smile and release her grip on the sheets when Elsa gently lay down the bed, facing her.

"Hi," Anna whispered.

"Hi," Elsa said with a tiny smile. Now that she was lying down beside Anna on the redhead's bed, her mind was slowly being turned to mush. Everything in this room belonged to Anna.  _She_  belonged to Anna even if the redhead doesn't know about it.  _I'm doomed_ , she mentally noted.

It was too much. Staring at Elsa's icy blue eyes was too much, and it was weird. Anna always loved looking at those eyes, but now it was a little unsettling. She couldn't understand why she was feeling something stirring inside her stomach. It kept intensifying the longer she looked at Elsa's oceanic orbs. It was frightening... but she couldn't look away.

"Thank you," Anna said softly, as though she was afraid to break the comfortable silence. Maybe she was going crazy. Unsettling nerves and fluttery feelings that were unrecognizable, but she still found the situation comfortable.

"Rest, Anna. I'll be here," Elsa replied in equal hushed tone.

The silence in Anna's room was deafening, but hearing Elsa's voice sounding almost like a whisper... It was enough to ring inside her ears repeatedly. There were faint sounds of jingling bells, which was odd. She didn't have any bells in her room. Still. Elsa's voice and the way the blonde looked at her, Anna couldn't explain it, but she felt... lucky.

* * *

Yawning, Anna rubbed her still-sleepy eyes. Her body was still sore, but at least she could get herself to move. It wasn't as bad as the previous day, which was good. Even her mild fever died down.  _I had a good nurse_ , she mentally noted as she looked around her room. A pang of disappointment shot through her the moment she saw the other side of her bed unoccupied. She touched the place where Elsa had slept the previous night and noticed that it was already cold.

Elsa had been up for a while.

Anna gripped the sheets on Elsa's side. Just a few minutes or maybe even hours ago, Elsa was there sleeping beside her. It was peaceful, and the warmth that the blonde radiated soothed her. Anna loved it, and she was able to sleep rather well despite her fatigue and mild headache. But she couldn't understand it. There was definitely something going on that she couldn't explain. Something about Elsa was different, and it infuriated her to no end because she couldn't figure out what it was.

"Nice hair," Elsa giggled when Anna popped out of the hallway. When the redhead didn't respond, her eyebrows furrowed in concern. "What's wrong?"

"You're not going again?"

It wasn't the question Anna wanted to ask, but she also didn't know what it was she wanted to ask either. If only she could explain what she was feeling, maybe Elsa would understand. The blonde was smart and analytical. Maybe if Anna could put her thoughts and feelings into words, Elsa could tell her what it meant. She couldn't go out into a rambling spree about these 'lub-dub-dub-lub' and 'boom-boom-badum' and 'ba-dum-tsh' and that her feelings went 'thud-thud' and 'plop-plop' every time she looked at Elsa, right? It doesn't explain anything!

"Belle just sent a message. Her friend had a class before ours but we have the same professor. He wasn't in," Elsa informed as she prepared the food for the two of them.

"You're close now?" Anna sat on one of the stools, eyes not once leaving Elsa's apron-clad self. She felt another one of those 'thud-thud', but then it went 'plop-plop' when an image of Elsa and Belle being close popped into her head.

"If you mean exchanging a few greetings, yes. She's the only girl in the same course that goes to the same gym." Elsa placed a plate in front of Anna.

"Did you tell her why you stopped going?"

"To the gym?" Elsa asked and Anna nodded once. "I just said I wanted to take a break. Wouldn't want  _someone_ getting angry when I faint again, right?"

All too suddenly, those weird and fancy descriptions from earlier happened at once. One side of Elsa's lips curled upwards and Anna didn't know what to do. Elsa was obviously teasing her and she didn't know how to react. She just went as stiff as a board, stuck with looking deep into Elsa's eyes.

It didn't go unnoticed by the blonde either. Elsa started feeling anxious because what if Anna noticed her feelings? Was there something about her words that made her realize it? What would happen now? Will Anna call the deal off? Will she get disgusted? Will she ha—

"Good." Anna began eating the food that Elsa had prepared for her, trying to act normal despite having a hard time concentrating. She couldn't get Belle off her mind. "Wha—?" Anna blinked when something soft touched the side of her lips. Her head snapped to the side to see Elsa holding a fork with some sausage on it. "What are you...?"

"You're sulking." Elsa gave a sad smile.

"I'm not!" Anna frowned but found herself having a hard time suppressing a blush.

"Come on. It tastes better when it's still hot." Elsa poked Anna's lips with the sausage again.

"I-I can eat, you know?"

"I know," Elsa admitted and it was then that Anna noticed the subtle blush on her cheeks. "But you said to initiate contact. Is this wrong?" she asked with a shaky voice, making the redhead's face burn brighter than her hair.

 _Why am I getting so nervous?! This isn't even the first time Elsa fed me_ , Anna tried to reason with herself. "N-No, no. It's... fine," Anna promised a little hesitantly, not knowing what to do when Elsa smiled and offered the sausage again.  _Just eat it, Anna! She's not used to this_ , she mentally berated herself. Anna balled her hand into a fist and took a bite, delighting at the way Elsa's blush deepened.

It was positively different. Anna was going crazier by the second and she was desperate to find the words that can make her explain what she was feeling. She needed help from someone really smart, but she had to be sensible enough when explaining. She was sure that people would only look at her weird if she tried to explain it the way her mind was telling her to. Who wouldn't?


	9. When Jealousy Strikes

Life could be cruel sometimes.

About a week ago, Anna was thinking about Belle and how there was this annoying twist inside her gut that wouldn't go away every time she'd picture Elsa and the brunette together. It was already annoying to the imagination, but now, she had to experience it firsthand. The irritating feeling wouldn't go away no matter how hard she tried, only intensifying after hearing Elsa's innocent statement.

Anna's hand stopped drawing as she looked at Elsa and her visitor who had intruded into the solitude of her and Elsa's home. "Stay over?"

"Yeah." Elsa flipped through the papers she was holding. "We need to critique each other's papers and submit it tomorrow."

"What kind of professor would make a student read hundreds of pages and expect them to submit it the next day?!" Anna huffed, not bothering to mask her irritation.

"Ours, that's who. And it doesn't even reach one hundred pages, Anna." Elsa placed the papers on top of the dining table. "Sit down," she said to her guest.

Anna watched Belle sit beside Elsa. She had been busy drawing on top of their dining table when Elsa arrived with the brunette. That 'urgh' feeling from way back when came crashing down on her like a ton of bricks. She was glad that Elsa decided to do the critiquing in their apartment. At least then, she could keep an eye on Belle. But then, seeing them together also made her stomach churn in the wrong places.

"What are you critiquing anyway?" Anna wondered.

"Just... stuff." Elsa shrugged and offered a paper to Belle.

The side of Anna's lips twitched for being ignored. Well, maybe not totally ignored. She just hated how Elsa didn't really explain anything! Granted, she wasn't  _that_ interested. She just wanted to break their composure and all that stuff. Okay, maybe that wasn't really nice. Still. She was always talking when Elsa would do a research anyway! Okay, that wasn't nice too.  _Ugh_.

"I don't think this part is necessary. There's already an explanation on this one," Belle said quietly while pointing on something on Elsa's paper. Anna frowned when Elsa leaned closer and looked at the corrections the brunette was talking about.

Soon, the two started talking about technical stuff and whatnot - things that Anna had no care about. She most especially didn't like how Elsa would keep smiling and talking to the brunette with this sweet tone she only ever does to her! Was she always like this to Belle?!

"Anna, sorry. Can you pick that up?" Elsa asked when their apartment phone rang.

Instead of saying anything, Anna slammed the table and stood up. The abruptness took Elsa and Belle off guard, but before any of them could speak, she walked to their living room to answer the damn phone. Was Elsa so busy with Belle that she couldn't even pick it up?!  _Papers your fa– whoa! Chill out,_ Anna mentally berated herself. She knew that they really do need some time, but she couldn't help it.

Anna knew that Belle was into Elsa after all.

No, Belle didn't say it. Even Elsa was denying it. But Anna had been at the brunt of the brunette's glare ever since they'd met. Why else would someone glare at her so much? She didn't do anything to make her angry! They barely even talked!

"What?!" Anna answered, not bothering to be kind. The poor person on the other line gasped, but Anna could care less. At least until the person spoke.

" **Well, hello to you too,** " said a chilly feminine voice.

"M-Mom!" Anna shrieked. "Sorry! I'm sorry! I was ju—"

" **Save your excuses some other time.** " It was easy for Anna to imagine her mother rubbing the bridge of her nose. " **I take it; you're not in the mood. Maybe we can just talk when yo—** "

"No, no, no! It's good! I have time! In fact, I welcome it!" A wicked smirk grew on Anna's lips. This could be a nice distraction from Elsa and Belle... and the other way around. _Let's see if you can still ignore me_ , Anna thought mischievously.

Meanwhile, Elsa noticed how Belle looked a little uneasy.  _Guess she's not used to someone talking so much while working_ , she noted inwardly. She looked at Anna who was now sitting on the sofa, hugging her knees and talking louder than necessary. When their eyes met, Elsa frowned and tried to warn the girl with a look alone, but Anna snapped her eyes away.

"Sorry about her." Elsa smiled apologetically at the brunette.

"No, it's alright." Belle raised a hand for emphasis. "It's better than the loud drilling noises outside my apartment. I'm pretty sure we can't do any work done there."

"True, but she's being louder than usual." Elsa frowned and shot a warning look at the girl again, only to have her heart skip a beat when Anna stuck out her tongue. "I think she's doing it on purpose."

"Oh?"

"She always does it when she wants to talk or spend time together. Sometimes, she'd just sit and stare." Elsa shrugged and picked up a paper and tried to read.

"You don't get distracted?"

"I'm used to it." Elsa flipped through Belle's papers and corrected some lines while trying to ignore Anna's loud conversation with her mother. Usually, she would listen and be a part of the conversation, but right now, she has a visitor and she had to be twice as hospitable knowing that Anna wouldn't be.

"She's an artist?" Belle asked while looking at Anna's papers.

"Mhm. She's studying at C.U.," Elsa informed, pride blooming in her chest.

"Corona University?" When Elsa nodded, Belle looked at Anna's papers in amusement.

It was an understatement to say that Elsa was proud of Anna. Anna wasn't academically inclined, but because of her talent and skills in drawing, she was able to enter the prestigious Corona University: a school that specialized in Arts and Design. There were many courses connected to arts there, but because of an animation they watched as kids, Anna made it her life mission to become an animator. But of course, even without the achievement, Elsa was still proud. It was Anna after all.

" **—letter, okay?** " Anna tightened her hold on the phone, eyes unable to leave Elsa and Belle. Her heart clenched at the way Elsa would giggle beside the brunette. She was thankful that Elsa was hiding her laughter behind her hand, but seeing her giggle because of someone else made Anna's stomach flip.

"Yes, mom," Anna agreed, not remembering what they were talking about.

" **What did I say?** " Bulda asked on the other line.

"You said to ignore the letter." The other line went silent, and for a moment, Anna had to wonder if the call ended. She looked at the screen of the telephone to make sure.  _Still running_ , she frowned. "Hello?"

 **"Hon, I need you to go to the doctor and get your ears checked.** " Before Anna could ask what she was talking about, Bulda spoke again. " **What do you mean 'ignore'?! I was telling you to design invitation letters for your little brother's birthday!** " she spat angrily and Anna had to pull the phone away.

" _Sheesh_." Anna rubbed her ears before putting the phone back. "Chill out, mom! I was only testing you out! I know. Yeah, yeah, sure. Invitation for Olaf's birthday. But... Why do we need an invitation?"

" **It's his request. Something about wanting his friends to come but he wasn't sure if their parents would allow them.** "

"It's a children's party that won't happen in about two months, mom. Don't you know, like, most of the people there? Just invite them!" Anna huffed because she wasn't sure if she had the time to design an invitation.

" **Come on, Anna. Consider this your gift to him.** "

"Yeah, as if he'll accept this as a gift." Anna rolled her eyes. "For sure, he'll be asking me for another one of those robot fighters of that show he's been watching lately."

" **Do I have to remind you who introduced that anime to him?** "

"No need, mom. Okay, fine, I get it." Anna groaned and rubbed one side of her head. "Do I get money for this?"

" **Do you want me to reduce your allowance?** "

"You're a monster!"

" **And you're the monster's child,** " Bulda snorted. " **You can come home, right? Olaf really misses you. He's been playing with all those robots you bought for him during your last visit.** "

"Yeah, I think so." Anna grabbed the calendar on top of the coffee table. "Yeah, I think I can manage. I get off on the sixteenth."

" **What about Elsie? She will come with you, right?** " Bulda asked, expectation evident in her tone.

Elsa had always been close to Anna's parents. So much so that it was almost as if Elsa was the daughter instead of her. Heck, they only ever agreed to let her live away from them solely because Elsa was with her!

"I'll ask. Our university breaks don't match up," Anna noted, barely able to keep the bitterness away from her voice. When her eyes met Elsa's again, she quickly looked at the calendar instead. "Uhm... Mom?"

* * *

"Your room?"

"Yes," Elsa confirmed while compiling the papers. "She's my guest. We still have a long way to go and might not sleep. We don't want to distract you."

"You're not going to sleep? Elsie, you'll get sick! You're not overworking yourself, are you?"

When Belle went to their bathroom, Elsa dropped the bomb. Elsa already mentioned that Belle would be staying over, but it still surprised Anna to hear that the brunette would be staying in Elsa's room. She didn't like the idea of them sharing the same room.

"I'm fine, Anna. It's just for one night."

"It's not  _just_ one night, Elsie! It's one night!"

"It depends if we can finish early or not. We might take a nap from time to time, but, hopefully, we can get it done and rest."

Anna wanted to say something about Elsa always refusing to sleep beside someone else but her. That she wouldn't let anyone inside her room aside from Anna. She knew that Elsa and Belle were really busy with this research. Elsa said so herself, and the blonde doesn't lie to her. She knew, but she didn't like it. She didn't want Elsa to share the same things with other people when she would only do those things with her before.

_Am I... jealous?_

For Elsa though, she was clueless about the other turmoil inside Anna. She only thought that the girl was worried about her. Anna had been causing quite the scene ever since she fainted. Back then though, it wasn't only the stress and everything but also because Anna asked for a kiss. Maybe that was the final blow to finally pass out. Sometimes, Elsa had to wonder what could've happened if she didn't faint.

"B-But..." Anna paused, finding it hard to come up with some sort of excuse. There wasn't really any other excuse but jealousy and worry. She can try to push the worry part, but she also knew that Elsa can be stubborn when it came to academics. "A-At least take a nap... please."

Elsa's heart skipped a couple of beats at the way Anna just said it. It sounded soft, gentle, and weak. Almost like she was afraid to say it. "I will," Elsa promised. She looked at the digital clock before giving Anna her full attention. "You should rest. It's getting late." When Anna didn't move or say anything, Elsa sighed. "Anna, I'll be fi—"

All words remained unspoken when Anna placed a soft lingering kiss on her cheek. The worst (or good?) part was that Anna didn't pull away immediately. Everything was frozen at that moment, and Elsa's thoughts refused to form. Once the redhead pulled away, Elsa stared completely breathless at the way her face sported a rosy hue.

"G-Goodnight, Elsie," Anna stuttered and bolted off to her room.


	10. Why?

"Thank you."

Elsa smiled and took a seat at one of the chairs while Belle took a sip from her hot chocolate. They barely caught sleep because of the research. For the blonde, she wasn't able to concentrate because of that kiss Anna gave her. It wasn't even the first time the redhead did that, but she had to wonder why that kiss felt... different from the others.

"Anna's not up yet?"

"She doesn't have a class today."

The previous night tested Elsa's resolve. She wanted to ask about that kiss, but then it would look odd. Anna would always kiss her anyway. Suddenly asking about it would be weird. She wasn't supposed to mind, but the way Anna's face went bright red after giving that particular kiss made her think otherwise. It was the first time Anna blushed after kissing her. Why?

"So... You and Anna are going out?"

"W-What?"

"You're not the only one observant, Elsa. It comes with the career choice. We  _have_ to be observant," Belle pointed out. "She was blushing when I bumped into her last night. What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything! A-And we're... not..." Elsa paused. "We're... uhm... complicated?"

Now that Elsa thought about it, Anna didn't say anything about telling other people what they were. Was it alright to tell someone else about them? What were they anyway? Were they still in the 'best friend' stage or was Anna her... girlfriend? They weren't official, but they did go on multiple dates while acting as lovers. Introducing Anna as her fake girlfriend didn't sound right but so does introducing her as a best friend.

"Complicated? Doesn't seem complicated to me." Belle took a bite off a hotdog. "It looked like she really wanted to get your attention yesterday. Was she jealous of me?"

Jealous? Anna? Why would she be jealous? Elsa and Belle were dating. They didn't do anything wrong either, so why get jealous? Besides, they were official either.  _There's no way she was jealous_ , she thought and ignored the slight pang of hurt she imprinted on herself.

"I told you she always does that. We didn't do anything wrong anyway."

"Elsa, right or wrong has no meaning when it comes to jealousy." Belle pointed at her with a fork. "If you like the person, you get jealous when they get close to someone else, right?"

 _I know that more than anyone_ , she admitted inside her head. She had been jealous countless times before. Every time Anna would have a new boyfriend, it killed her. One, two, three... She couldn't remember how many boyfriends Anna had. It wasn't only the five guys this year either. Ever since they started living alone, Anna had different boyfriends. It didn't matter that there were no feelings involved in Anna's side; it still hurt Elsa every time.

After all, those guys were able to officially call Anna theirs at some point.

Elsa was also aware of everything that went on in every relationship. Anna wasn't secretive when it comes to her. She knew everything that went on her dates. She also knew how the redhead's first kiss happened. That one killed her. She knew it was normal for a couple, but she dreaded the time it was finally brought up to her knowledge.

"Morning."

Elsa's head snapped to the side to see Anna completely dressed up and wearing a tiny smile. "Morning," Elsa managed to say with a smile despite the nervousness she felt when Anna looked at Belle.  _Great, now I'm getting ideas._ That odd feeling from the previous night combined with Belle's statement a few minutes ago made her mind a jumble of a mess.

"How's the critiquing?" Anna asked as she looked at the blonde again. "Were you able to finish? Did you get any sleep?"

"Mhm. We're done." Elsa decided to leave the part where she was only able to sleep for a few minutes knowing that Anna would only get angry. The girl had always been strict when it came to her sleeping habits.  _I can't blame her though_ , she sighed inwardly.

"Elsa's bed was so soft and comfortable!" Belle said and Elsa was somehow able to fight the urge to widen her eyes.

"I know," Anna said, making Elsa look at her again.

Anna was still smiling, but there was something off about it. Elsa's hunch only grew the moment she saw how the redhead's hands were balled into fists. She watched as Anna broke their eye contact and opted to walk towards the refrigerator.

"What are you looking for?" Elsa wondered when Anna only sat in front of an open fridge.

"Sandwich."

"I cooked."

"Not hungry."

"Why? Did you eat something?"

Anna closed the fridge and stood, a box of chocolate milk on hand. Their eyes locked again, and if Elsa wasn't mistaken, Anna's eyes were a little... red. Why? It couldn't be just after waking up since the girl already took a bath. Actually, even  _that_ was already questionable in itself. Why was she up early on her day off?

"Upset stomach." Anna popped the straw on the juice.

"And you're going to drink that?" Elsa raised an eyebrow suspiciously. When Anna darted her eyes between the blonde and the chocolate juice, she knew she made her point. "Eat," she demanded, pointing to the table.

"I'm good! I love chocolate, and no upset stomach will stop me!" Anna broke out into a giant toothy grin that definitely didn't work on Elsa.

"Anna," Elsa warned. Anna's grin softened into a small smile as she took a sip of the juice. Elsa frowned and tried to warn the redhead with a look again, to no avail.

A second later, Anna clenched the box and threw it in the nearby trash bin. She stretched her arms and made her way out of the kitchen, leaving Elsa completely baffled.  _What was that?_ Elsa was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard a loud slurping noise. When she looked at the source, she was greeted with the sight of Belle nudging her head to the side, prodding her to go after the redhead.

"Where are you going?" Elsa watched Anna wearing her shoes.

"Mall." Anna adjusted her bag with her back facing Elsa. "Don't know how long. Buying gift for Olaf." She grabbed her keys and opened the door.

Elsa half expected Anna to say 'goodbye' or 'see you later', but it never came. She only closed the door without even looking back. It served to make Elsa even more uneasy.  _Okay, that's definitely off_. Frowning, Elsa opened the door to see Anna still a few ways down the hall.

"I'LL PICK YOU UP!" Elsa yelled to make sure Anna would hear her, not caring whether or not she disturbed the people next door. She was sure that Anna definitely heard it because her voice reverberated around the hall, so why didn't she look back or wave a hand just to acknowledge it?

When Elsa saw a subtle movement from the corner of her eyes, she looked to see a playful smile on Belle's lips. Even without saying anything, the blonde knew what was running inside her head. Elsa inhaled sharply as she looked at the now-empty hallway, her thoughts a whirlwind of a mess. But despite all that, only one question stood out.

_Why?_

* * *

Anna glared at the inanimate robot. She didn't need to buy something for Olaf this early since his birthday wouldn't be in a couple of months, but because she couldn't get any sleep the previous night, she had surfed the internet and found out about a sale going on about his favorite mecha anime. Hours of walking around until the mall opened, and once it did, she decided to walk around some more before looking for a gift. She had to do it until she could get her emotions under control as much as her sleepless state would allow it.

"Yes, Maam? Is there something specific you're looking for?" asked one of the salesladies.

"Peace and silence," Anna huffed and bolted somewhere else inside the shop.

Anna resigned herself to the idea that she really was jealous, but it was normal. She had always been Elsa's number one! That was why it came as a shock when Elsa nonchalantly let Belle in her room. In a way, she was glad that Elsa said she was able to sleep, but did they really have to sleep together?

 _Self-righteous brat_ , Anna mentally cursed herself. She had no idea she'd become such a monster when she became jealous. Not once did she ever felt such a combination of ugly emotions before. Not even to her previous relationships. Does that mean she never got jealous?

No matter how many times she tried to get herself together, she couldn't get Belle off her mind. Specifically, how Elsa treated her. Why did Elsa let her in her room? Why did Elsa let her sleep in her bed? Why did Elsa let her use her mug? Why did Elsa cook for her? Anna was aware that some of her questions were absurd, but she couldn't help it. She needed some time to herself. To think things through.

"You're not a real girlfriend," Anna warned herself and picked up two boxes of robot toys. She went to the cashier and stood in line for who-knows-how-long. After paying, she went out of the shop and walked aimlessly around the mall.

She tried to distract herself with anything; ranging from the funny looking poster, the seasonal decorations, and the kid running around with her friends. She really tried, but everything reminded her of Elsa. How the blonde laughed when Anna created her very first poster which ended up quite hideous, how she and Elsa would decorate their apartment together, and how they would usually play around as children.

If Elsa did find someone she liked and if it ended up to be Belle, will it hurt more than this? Anna didn't want to think about it, but the possibility was always there. She had promised Elsa that they would stop this bogus of a relationship once she found someone she liked.  _I don't want her to_ , Anna admitted to herself. She knew it was selfish even for a friend, but she didn't like the idea of Elsa being sweet to any other girl but her. The question was: why?

"Anna?"

Anna halted on her steps upon hearing a familiar manly voice. Swallowing thickly, she slowly shifted her gaze away from the children to look at the guy who was only a few feet away from her. Her heart hammered in her chest, but it wasn't the wonderful kind. It wasn't the same kind of scary but soothing feeling she always had when looking at Elsa. This time, she only felt nervous and awkward at the sight of her most recent ex.

"Hans."


	11. Was It Clear?

Anna awkwardly sipped on her iced tea while sitting across Hans. Mercifully, his friends went somewhere else to give them privacy. If they were going to talk about something, she would prefer it if no one else was in the picture.

"How are you?" Hans asked.

"Great," Anna shrugged, nonchalant despite the continuous fiddling of her fingers on top of her lap. What was she supposed to say to an ex? If it was some other guy, maybe she would be fine. But this was Hans. He wasn't just  _any_ guy.

Hans smirked. "How're things with Elsa?"

There it was. The question she knew would inevitably come out of his mouth. She knew, but it still pissed her off when she heard it. Why was it that everyone would think that Elsa would jump on her? Just because Elsa was gay didn't mean it was natural for her to fall for Anna! _God knows how much I want her to– ugh!_

"Look, Hans. I was the one who rejected you, okay? There's no need to drag Elsa into this again."

"Why are you being defensive? I was only asking how things are with her," Hans chuckled. "Did you tell her yet? Or are you going to wait until she falls for someone else?"

"Are you going to push this? Because I really don't need this right now." Anna rubbed her temples. "What are you expecting me to tell her anyway? That we broke up because you wanted me to avoid her? I already said it, if that's what you're wondering about."

Hans frowned and looked at her like she was the most despicable being on earth. But of course, since the despicable one was him, Anna gave him an equally intense glare. She absolutely hated how he would constantly push on the topic. Out of all her exes, Hans was the only one persistent enough to push this issue with Elsa.

Sighing, Hans leaned back in his chair. "You really don't get it, do you?"

"Get what?" Anna spat angrily.

Today was definitely not her day. Pulling an all-nighter and hearing how Belle slept in Elsa's bed, how Belle used Elsa's mug, how Belle ate Elsa's cooking... and now, this?  _Just hurry up and shower me with bad lucks_ , she huffed inwardly. Seriously, if this was just the beginning, she could hardly wait for it to end.

"I feel sorry for Elsa."

"Would you please stop pushing it?!" Anna hissed. "You won't get anything out of this, Hans. I won't sleep with you no matter how much you try and piss me off into it."

"I know, and I'm not going to beg." Hans shrugged. "I thought you finally figured it out after that time I asked for sex. Judging by your words and actions now, I think not."

"Figure  _what_  out?" Anna asked, irritated.

This seemingly perfect guy that she once thought to be her prince charming was now pushing all her buttons the wrong way. What happened to them? They were good friends, but when they started going out, he started convincing her to avoid Elsa.

"Nevermind." Hans waved the topic off. "So what's eating you today? You looked grumpier than usual."

"What's it to you?"

"Can't I worry about a friend? We got along well before we dated, Anna. Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Hans looked genuinely hurt, and for a moment, Anna felt guilty. But then again, that was one of the reasons why she would always get fooled into a relationship.

"It's none of your business." Anna took another a sip of her iced tea.

"Is there a new girl in Elsa's life?" Anna stilled as those words left her ex's lips. " _Bingo_ ," Hans chuckled.

"There's no one," Anna hissed, but somewhere inside her mind, she knew she could be wrong. Belle was in the picture. Can she be considered as Elsa's girl?  _I hope not_ , she thought grimly.

"Sometimes, I had to wonder why I still love you," Hans said suddenly that Anna could do nothing but stare at the subtle blush that appeared on his face. "Keep that up and I'll seriously force myself on you, Anna."

"W-What? I'm not going out with you again!" Anna scoffed.

"Not that. I'm not going to ask that because clearly, you don't feel the same," Hans assured. "Anna, why didn't you sleep with me? You said you loved me. You kept telling me you do, but why didn't you move in with me?"

"You're asking me to avoid Elsa, Hans! Do you honestly think I'll do that? Do you think I'll sleep with you knowing that you can't accept my best friend?"

"If I didn't tell you to avoid her, would you sleep with me?"

For some reason, she felt terrible hearing the gentle way he asked. It wasn't only the pained look on his face, but the words that fell out of his mouth. If he didn't ask her to avoid Elsa, would she sleep with him? If she was being honest, she never imagined sleeping with any of her previous boyfriends. There were times she was curious and wondered what it felt like, but she didn't dare ask nor do something about it.

It wasn't as if she didn't want to imagine.

She couldn't.

Every time she would try, her mind would get dizzy, but it wasn't the wonderful kind. It twisted her stomach and the very idea that some guy would pin her down repulsed her like no other. It didn't matter if it was Hans or any of her exes; she couldn't imagine sleeping with any... guy?

"I asked you a question before, Anna, and your answer was clear to me," Hans prodded gently, "but was it clear to you?"

* * *

" **—her, okay?** "

Elsa gripped her phone in place, heart unable to decide if it wanted to swell or to clench at the trust placed upon her. She knew that even without them telling her about it, she would undoubtedly do it anyway. Okay, maybe  _that_ was the reason why.

"Yes, Mommy," Elsa promised. "I'm about to pick her up. She's buying a gift for Olaf." Looking at the entrance to the parking lot, she cringed when she noticed how crowded it was.

" **Pick her up? You didn't go together?** "

"I had to submit something to my professor. She went ahead." Elsa decided to leave the information about Anna practically bolting out of the apartment. She made a mental note of having a clear discussion about it once they meet up.

" **I see. Alright, well, have fun!** "

"Yes, Mommy. Take care," Elsa sighed and ended the call.

In her wasted and sleepy stated, it was a miracle that Elsa was able to get to the mall safely. Maybe a nap wouldn't be so bad? She couldn't deny that the idea was tempting, but she would rather do it in the apartment. She didn't have any class for the rest of the day. A few more hours awake and spent with Anna wouldn't be so bad.

Grabbing her things, Elsa forced herself out of the car before checking her phone again to see if Anna responded to any of her messages. She didn't.  _Guess I'll just have to look around_ , she thought disappointedly. She knew that if Anna went home, she would've at least messaged back. They weren't fighting, were they? Surely, Anna had cooled off by now.

_She did, right?_

Elsa shook the thoughts away and focused on the task at hand. What were the places Anna would usually go to when in a mall? Did she already buy her gift for Olaf? If it was her little brother, maybe it would be another one of those robots. Elsa remembered one of those shops. She went with Anna to buy some of those before, after all. It had been hours since the redhead left, though. Where could she be?

"Wha...!" Elsa jumped when she felt her phone vibrate. Quickly, she fiddled with her bag in search of her phone, and once she found it, a weight was lifted off her shoulders.

 **From:** Anna  
 **To:** Elsa  
Where are you? I'm on the sides of the ice rink! Skaters are really good! \\(^o^)/ – Anna

"Ice..." Elsa trailed off, feeling panic slowly rise within her.

Elsa ran towards the ominous rink, desperate to reach Anna as soon as possible. Never in her entire life had she ever been proud to be so fit than at that moment. The temperature started to drop and her breaths coming out in puffs of white the closer she was to the ice rink. As soon as she reached the sides, she searched desperately for that familiar shade of strawberry blonde hair.

"ELSIE!" A girl was waving her arm frantically, the voice telling Elsa who it was. "Did you see that?! They were ama—"

"What are you doing?!" Elsa asked as soon as she was in front of Anna. "You- You're not wearing a jacket or a scarf or anything to keep you warm!"

"Wait, what?"

"This place is cold! Ice! The air conditioner is on full blast too!" When Anna only looked at her with a blank stare, Elsa pinched the bridge of her nose. "You'll get sick."

"Oh." Anna blinked. "Wait, wait! Calm down! It's not snowing! It's a different kind of cold from winter!"

The moment Elsa only frowned, Anna's face heated up. She felt akin to a child being scolded by her mother. Only, the one scolding her was Elsa. That was to say, she was shocked and touched when the blonde mentioned something about it. She admits that Elsa could get extreme with her protectiveness at times, but she appreciated everything. After all, Elsa remembered that she was sensitive to the cold.

"Your eyes," Anna said instead, not wanting to make a big deal out of the winter issue when she wasn't even feeling cold at the moment. "You... You didn't really sleep last night, did you?"

"I did." Elsa shuffled uncomfortably when Anna narrowed her eyes. "I took a nap."

"I... I'll drive us home," Anna offered. "Sleep in the car, Elsie. It's just for a few minutes, but it might help. You look tired."

"I'm not sure if I can sleep with you driving," Elsa teased.

"We got our license together, Elsie. I just don't have my own car."

"Right." Elsa was honestly surprised that Anna was calm about it. "W-Were you able to buy a gift for Olaf?"

"Mhm." Anna lifted a paper bag. "I also bought  _your_ gift to him because I know you suck at choosing robots. You owe me."

"I... I guess I do."

"Let's go?" Anna tilted her head to the side and looked at Elsa with a look that the blonde can only explain as... nevermind. She couldn't even explain it. There was just something...

"Now?" Elsa's eyebrows shot up to her hairline. "Didn't you want to watch the skaters?" She pointed to the rink and looked inside herself, her world stilling when she saw a familiar auburn haired man skating around inside.

There wasn't a professional ice skating competition going on. Instead, there was a group of friends showing off in the middle of the rink. Elsa recognized one of those people, and it made her feel awkward. What was she supposed to do in a situation like this? Should she ask, or pretend that she didn't see?

"He got better at skating," Anna noted. "I bumped into them earlier and they asked me to watch."

"Oh." Elsa managed to say out loud. "You're okay with him now?" she asked nervously, still remembering how the guy asked to sleep with Anna.

"Mhm. We talked it out." Anna waved at her ex's friends when they did.

"Do you...?" Elsa trailed off, afraid to ask if Anna still liked the guy. 'Talked it out' could mean anything, and she feared that the two decided to come back together.

Anna knew it too. She knew that Elsa would ask about it if ever something like this happened. She knew, and it only made her heart clenched painfully tight. After that long conversation with Hans, she was even more terrified of the growing feelings inside her. His words left quite the impression both then and now. Maybe because their situation  _could_ be similar. Was this what he felt when they were in a relationship?

"I don't." Anna balled her hands into fists the moment Hans turned to look at her and Elsa. He smiled knowingly and went back to skating with his friends. "I didn't love him either."


	12. Confusion and Denial

Elsa failed to concentrate on the rest of her papers as Anna's confession of not loving Hans refused to leave her head. Elsa knew. She knew that Anna never loved any of her exes in a lover kind of way, but still it troubled her. Why would Anna mention it now? Anna's actions the last few days had been odd. There was that random form of jealousy with Belle, and now this thing with Hans.

"Elsie?"

"Yeah?"

"How did you realize you were into girls?"

Pen stopping in midair, Elsa lifted her gaze to see a tensed look on Anna's face. "I don't know," Elsa admitted, weighing her answers carefully. "I was never attracted to men."

"I see," Anna muttered, returning back to sketching.

Not wanting to think too much about the question that undoubtedly raised a flag, Elsa tried to focus on her papers again. If she didn't get herself together fast, she'd definitely take more hours doing it than necessary.

"I want to visit a gay club."

Elsa choked on her own spit, eyes instantly widening as she looked at Anna's decisive face. The only thing running inside her head then was  _why_. She was aware that Anna's mind sometimes - maybe even always - worked wonders and that she was really impulsive. Most of the time, Elsa would play along. But... a gay club?

"Why?"

"I'm just interested... to see what it's like in there." Anna propped an elbow up on the table, placing her chin on her palm. "Maybe I can understand why some people fall for the same gender."

"Wha- Why are you curious about that?"

"I want to understand why you're into girls."

"Anna, there's no explanation for that," Elsa tried. "And a gay club? Do I look like I go to a gay club? How can you understand me if I don't even go there?"

"Well, where else do I go to check girls out?"

"Y-Y-You're going to check girls out?" Elsa sputtered.

"Want to come with me?" Anna asked with a wink.

"What? No! I don't do clubbing, Anna. You know that." Elsa took a few deep breaths to calm down before gesturing to her notes. "And I have to finish this by tonight."

"Alright then." Anna stood up. "See you later, Elsie!"

Elsa was left stupefied and completely baffled. There was absolutely no way Anna would go to a gay club and check girls out, right? She was straight and, for sure, just curious. She said so herself: she wanted to see what it was like in there and to understand why... Elsa was into... girls?

"Are you serious?" Elsa wondered when Anna came back to the living room all dressed up and on her way to the front door.

"Yup! I'll see what it looks like and maybe drink some booze or whatever." Elsa frowned, and Anna giggled. "I'm not going to get drunk, Elsie. I'm not broken-hearted."

"B-But I told you there's no explanation for me liking girls."

"There's always an explanation for everything!" Anna patted her chest twice for emphasis. "And I'm going to look for an answer! You said you didn't know, but I want to understand! Why are you into girls?"

"It's just like you getting attracted to guys," Elsa pointed out, trying to keep the desperation out of her voice. "Only, I feel it to a girl. It's- Look, Anna, there's no need to go so far just to understand me better."

"Why not? What's wrong with wanting to understand you better? I'm curious because it involves  _you_. I want to understand why you like them."

Never in her life did Elsa ever thought she'd have to explain this kind of thing to Anna. That was to say, she didn't exactly have any explanation for it. It was like trying to explain why people have to breathe or why the sun rose every morning. It was... natural.

"Do you see sparkles when you look at them? Do you hear jingling bells when you look at them? When you look at a girl's eyes, do you get that feeling like you want to just melt and get lost in there?"

"I..." Elsa paused. "I do."

"Then I really want to go! I want to know how it works! Why you can feel those because I—!" Anna stopped and bit her lower lip. "I just want to understand!"

"Anna, you won't be able to get it unless yo—"

"Let me see for myself, Elsie. Please." Anna's head lowered. "I-I just want to understand..."

See for herself? Of course. Anna had always been a curious child. Once it hit her, she would do everything she could to understand something. This time though, Elsa knew that the redhead wouldn't get it. She wouldn't get it unless she fell for a girl.

"B-But... you're going to visit a gay club... in those clothes." Elsa looked at Anna from head to toe, resigning herself to the fact that the girl wouldn't let this go.

Relief flooded Anna's veins when Elsa diverted the topic. She was afraid that her excuse wouldn't work. In truth, she was totally bothered about her own possessiveness the last few days. Even the conversation with Hans made her feel more terrified. The realization that hit her that day frightened her. If she couldn't imagine sleeping with a guy, was there a chance that she was gay too? It didn't matter, but the idea that it  _could_ be Elsa who made her confused was scary.

"Yeah, why not?"

"Just... wait here." Elsa walked towards her room, having an internal debate with herself. It was one thing that Anna would go to a gay club because of curiosity, but knowing that a bunch of strangers could see her in such... teasing clothes was another thing. "Here." Elsa covered Anna with a trench coat long enough to reach her knees.

The action alone spread a warmth in Anna's chest. A part of her already knew what it was, but she didn't want to acknowledge it.  _Not my best friend_ , she pleaded to no one in particular. Maybe she told it to herself. She wouldn't mind being gay. She can fall for anyone, but not her best friend. Not the girl she grew up with, not the girl who only treated her as a sister, not the girl she couldn't bear to lose, and not to Elsa who was the most important person to her.

"T-Thanks," Anna stuttered.

"Are you... are you really going? It could be uncomfortable."

"Why?"

"W-Well... s-someone might hit on you. It's a club and..."

"I'm used to getting hit on," Anna blurted. "But it doesn't mean I let them get their way. Besides, I doubt I'll notice it if a girl flirts with me."

"That's..." Elsa paused. "Do you have to go?"

Once again, those loud ringing and jingling bells rang inside Anna's ears. The way Elsa looked a little tense in front of her made her uneasy, but there was also something about it that felt soothing somehow. It scared the shit out of her.

"Yes, Elsie," Anna stated firmly, determined to figure out the truth behind her sexuality. She knew that Elsa was worried, but she didn't want to admit that she could be gay when she herself wasn't sure.

"T-Then... at least let me take you there. I-I could join you if you want..." Elsa bit her lower lip and toyed with the tip of her braids.

Anna's heart skipped a beat after hearing Elsa's offer even if she was busy. If they didn't have that conversation, maybe she wouldn't mind. But at that moment, she was positively sure that she wouldn't want Elsa to be there. After all, she was confused because of her.

Elsa wasn't any different.

In truth, the blonde didn't want to go either. She was never much for clubbing, dancing and partying. But the thought that some random girl might come and pick Anna up had set her nerves on edge. She felt uneasy and was absolutely tempted to join the girl to make sure no one would hit on her, but she was exhausted and wanted to finish her research fast.

"I'll be fine, Elsie. You need to finish your research. I promise I won't take long." The gentle smile that graced Anna's lips calmed Elsa's state of mind by a bit, enough for her to relent. Albeit, reluctantly.


	13. Beautiful Nightmare

Anna didn't have any idea what she would do if she did end up being gay, but she would worry about that some other time. The only thing that mattered at the moment was how it was Elsa who made her question her sexuality. The idea that she was romantically attached to her best friend scared Anna big time. She hoped in all hopes out there that if she really did turn out to be gay, she would be gay for everyone... not just Elsa.

Unfortunately, life was a cruel mistress.

Even when she was already surrounded by girls who were dancing and pumping and grinding with each other, Anna couldn't find anyone who could trigger such effects. Her heart pounded loud and fast, sure. She felt gassy and elated. Excited, even. But no girl had the same effect on her. Was she just hallucinating? Unless she was high on some drug, she doubted it was just a dream. This thing with Elsa had been going on for a while now. Surely not?

"What can I do for you, lady?" asked the gorgeous bartender around her late-twenties. For a moment, Anna wondered what she was talking about, but then it hit her that she was in a bar and she has to order a drink.

"Uhm... Margarita, please." The lady nodded and did her thing, later on settling her drink in front of her. "Thanks." Anna took the glass and looked at the offending liquid for no real reason.

She wasn't in the mood to drink. She only wanted to sit and look around, observing people. But that wouldn't exactly help her know her own sexuality, right? Maybe one glass of anything wouldn't be too bad. Should she try and pick up girls or wait until someone picked her up? How does it work for two girls, anyway? Then again, this was a bar. Maybe coming up to someone could already pass as flirting? Should she just wait until a girl decided to shine in front of her?

"You look bothered." The bartender held a warm gentle smile.

"Was I that obvious?" Anna snorted, discreetly looking around the bar.

"Heartbreak?"

"Nope. Just curious about the place." Anna took a sip of her drink.

"First time in a lesbian bar?"

"Yup." An idea popped into her head. "Say, how do these girls know that they're... you know? I'm a little... confused."

"Oh." The lady's eyes sparkled. "Well, it differs for each girl. Some just know, while others realize it later in life."

"Yes, but  _how_  can they tell?"

"When you start questioning your own sexuality, there's a high possibility that you are gay. But just because you think that a girl is hot or gorgeous doesn't make you gay either. Honestly, you can't really... figure it out. More like, you just feel it."

 _That doesn't make sense_ , Anna thought in disappointment. It wasn't like she ever thought she was gay just because she could tell who was gorgeous and who was not. She never questioned her sexuality before, but now it was different... all because of Elsa.

"Hey there."

The bartender and Anna looked at the new girl who wore a charming smile. It was a cute blonde who was a bit taller than Anna, but not as tall as Elsa. Her blonde was honey blonde, but it didn't look as magical as Elsa's. Her eyes were of bright green, but it wasn't as bright as Elsa's icy blues. Her lips were red, but it was definitely because of lipstick, unlike Elsa's natural lip color. Overall, she was pretty, but not as gorgeous as Elsa.

"Hi." Anna smiled because Elsa always told her to be polite.

"Are you alone?" The blonde asked and the bartender left them alone.

 _Is she hitting on me?_ "Mhm. Just... curious about stuff." Anna shrugged and took another sip of her drink.

"Oh?" The blonde discreetly sat beside her.

"Wondering if I like girls," Anna bluntly stated, pulling an amused smirk from the blonde.

"And...? Do you?"

"No idea."

"Have you ever kissed a girl before?"

"Just on the cheek." Anna smiled fondly when she remembered Elsa fainting that time when she asked for a kiss.

"Well..." The blonde started slowly. "We could try and kiss. You know, so you can be sure?" she offered, eyes glinting with mirth.  _She's totally hitting on me_ , Anna thought.

Kissing a stranger didn't sit right with her, but it could be a chance to have an answer to her own questions. It would be better if it was with Elsa because she was more comfortable with her than with a stranger, but Elsa was against the idea. Not to mention, she was the reason why Anna was confused. As crazy as it sounded like, maybe kissing a girl aside from her best friend would help her understand herself better.

Anna adjusted on her seat to face the other girl directly. Surprise flashed across the pretty face before smirking, and she stood from her stool before cupping Anna's cheek with one hand. A second later, she leaned closer.

Three inches apart and the blonde closed her eyes.

Anna couldn't do it because she was studying the girl's face. She admitted that the girl was beautiful and looked sexually attractive, but Anna couldn't distinguish whether what she felt was admiration or attraction.

Two inches apart and Anna's heart started pounding loud and fast.

She was starting to notice how the girl's hand was very soft and how her eyelashes were quite long. Regardless of the fact that they were just in front of the bar, Anna could still smell a sweet fragrance radiating from the woman. It was oddly satisfying, but it felt wrong. She was attracted, but she felt disgusted too.

One inch apart and Anna folded her hands on top of her lap. There were butterflies inside her stomach, but it wasn't the wonderful and bubbly kind. She was confused, and then it happened.

Elsa's face flashed in her head.

It felt wrong.

Kissing this gorgeous woman in front of her felt wrong even if she was slightly turned on. Maybe it was the drink, or maybe it was because she was a woman, but it felt wrong. Anna tried to convince herself that what she could feel for Elsa could somehow be felt with this woman too, but it was futile. This woman wasn't Elsa, and it made her feel disgusted. She lifted her hands to push the blonde away before their lips  _really_ touched. She was honestly about to... until someone else did.

"Wha—?!"

Anna's breath caught upon catching a familiar minty scent. She was as stunned as the girl she was about to kiss a few seconds ago. Fear rushed inside her being. Fear of feeling relieved. "E-Elsa..."

As a pale hand grabbed her wrist harshly, Anna gasped. Elsa placed the payment for her drink without saying anything and dragged her away from the place, annoyed.

"E-Elsa, I—" Elsa didn't give her a chance to explain, and instead shove her inside the front seat of her car. Before Anna could speak again, the blonde shut the door and walked furiously to the driver seat. "Els—"

"Not now, Anna," Elsa dismissed abruptly that Anna had no choice but to shut up.

As soon as they reached their apartment, Anna tried to speak again. Elsa had been silent the entire ride and not once did she ever looked at her since the club. It made Anna's chest tighter, making it hard to breathe. Everything felt heavy at once and she felt like crying. She could handle anyone ignoring her, but she couldn't handle it when Elsa did.

"Le—"

All words and thoughts remained unspoken when she was forcefully pushed on the wall. It was then that those loud ringing and uncontrollable beats went out of whack. Only this time, fear was included. She was afraid because she was trapped between Elsa and the wall, long slender arms on both sides of her head. Normally, she wouldn't mind. This time, she did because Elsa was obviously enraged.

"What were you doing?!" Elsa hissed through gritted teeth.

Contrary to the time she wanted to explain, Anna couldn't bring herself to speak now. A huge lump lodged in her throat, and she felt akin to a mouse being cornered by a hungry cat. She felt a combination of good and bad jitters like she was happy that Elsa cared, but also afraid because Elsa was angry.

"Do you know that woman?!" Elsa whispered harshly, and the only thing Anna could do was shake her head. "How can you let her kiss you?! You said you don't let people get their way with you! Then, what was that?!"

"T-That's... I..." There were no excuses. Elsa was right, like always. It was a stupid thing to do. "I'm sorry."

The next happened so fast that Anna squeezed her eyes shut, afraid that Elsa finally snapped when she moved. It felt like she stopped breathing as she helplessly waited for the angry actions of Elsa… but it never came.

"You'd let a stranger kiss you..."

Elsa's voice sounded strained, causing Anna to open her eyes again and was met with a dark pool of oceanic orbs. The usually kind and gentle blues were now cold and mysterious. It was unsettling because, for the first time in her life, she couldn't tell what Elsa was thinking.

"...but you flinched when I tried."

In an instant, those bells, random noises, sparkles and flowers disappeared, replaced with fear, nervousness, and anxiety. Strange. It was already one thing that Anna was afraid because Elsa was mad at her. Being afraid of her own feelings was another thing. It was devastating.

"Rule number two, Anna.  _Don't flirt with someone else_." Elsa pulled her hands back, freeing Anna from her imprisonment, before leaving her alone to dwell on her own horrific thoughts.

Once the door to Elsa's room shut, Anna's legs gave up on her. Her face blew into a furious blush when the events that happened finally sunk in, she had to bite her lower lip hard until she tasted something metallic. Reaching up to clench on her shirt just right above her left chest, Anna whimpered. It wouldn't settle down. Even the tears she desperately held back finally fell freely.


	14. What Hurts The Most

How long had her eyes been reading the same line over and over again? It seemed like it had been such a long time, but there she was, still hoping that it would disappear or change. But even when her glare was so heated that it could drill holes on the paper, the rule didn't disappear.

Rule #5: Don't fall in love.

It was the only rule that Elsa implemented; the only reason why she accepted.

Elsa was already against the idea of dating, repeatedly saying how it was weird for best friends to pretend to be lovers. It was already one thing that Anna realized she was gay or bi, but to fall for her own best friend? Of all the girls to fall in love with, it just had to be Elsa! Why?! And now, she  _has_  to act normal because they were still in a pseudo-relationship. She couldn't let Elsa notice her feelings, especially when the blonde warned her about this beforehand!

Absolutely not! NO! WAY!

Then, there was also Elsa being distant ever since that night in the club. They would talk, but not a conversation as long as what they used to have. Of course, if Anna was being normal, she would've already busted her way through. But no. She wasn't the past her anymore. This time, she acknowledged her own feelings... and it only made things complicated.

"E-Elsa?"

Anna shuffled uncomfortably around the corner, knowing full well that she did something reckless and has to explain herself. It was harder than anything she had ever done before simply because she couldn't get Elsa's words off her head: how Anna would let that stranger kiss her but flinched away when she tried. Knowing Elsa, she was probably trying to make her realize how reckless she was that night.

 _I realized it_ , alright.

Anna could try and explain, but the only explanation was that she couldn't kiss her best friend, especially when there were feelings involved.

Elsa wasn't any better herself. She respected Anna and couldn't stop berating herself for almost forcing a kiss on the girl solely because of jealousy. If it wasn't for Anna flinching away from her, she would've done it. But still, that didn't mean it didn't hurt to see Anna look afraid of her, and how it was her who made Anna uneasy. Elsa was glad she was able to stop herself in time, but she hated how she was only able to do it because of Anna.

"Yeah?" Elsa asked without looking back.

"A-About the n-night in the c-club," Anna began, failing to notice the way Elsa stiffened. They hadn't talked about that yet. There were times when Anna tried to open the topic, but Elsa would always shrug it off.

"Let's no—"

"That girl and I didn't kiss," Anna promised. Of all things, she didn't want Elsa to misunderstand her proximity with the other blonde. Especially not when it was Elsa running inside her head the entire time.

However, Elsa only felt conflicted. To hear Anna admit that she and that girl didn't kiss was good news, but, nonetheless, they were close enough to do it. If she hadn't arrived, they would've done it. More importantly, why did Anna let a random girl get close to her that way? Was she  _that_  curious about how homosexuality worked? Didn't it matter if she kissed a guy or a girl?

Elsa didn't know what hurts the most: Anna letting another woman kiss her, Anna flinching away from her when she initiated a kiss, Anna with a guy, or Anna with a girl who wasn't her? Everything was confusing, and Elsa didn't know how to deal with it. Because this time, she was jealous of a girl.

"Anna." Elsa adjusted on her seat, finally looking at a fidgety redhead. For a moment, she hesitated. "Are you  _that_  curious? You'd let a stranger kiss you because you want to understand?"

Hearing it explained that way made Anna feel twice as stupid. So her actions were impulsive, but she was desperate then. Regardless of how strong those feelings were slowly becoming, she didn't want to believe that she was looking at her best friend romantically.

"I'm sorry."

"Were you able to get it?" Elsa asked, clutching her knees. "You said you wanted to understand why I'm into girls. Well? Were you able to do it?"

"I," Anna paused. "Elsa, I'm sorry. I was... I don't know what came over me a-and... I was under the influence of... alcohol."

Maybe that lady bartender was right. Being gay wasn't something she can just figure out. It was something that has to be 'felt'. Even Elsa said so. It was only like falling for a guy. Those nonsensical words from them, it made sense now. It did, but Anna couldn't understand why she had to experience it with Elsa. Of all people, why did it have to be with Elsa?

"It's fine." Elsa sighed and looked at her papers again. "It already happened. Let's just forget about it."

"B-But y-you're angry."

"I'm not. I just need to finish these."

"O-Okay... I'll... be in my room."

Anna didn't know what to do with herself. She wanted to hug Elsa and assure her that nothing happened between her and the girl in the bar, but at the same time, she was reluctant. They weren't real girlfriends. It was all fake and there weren't supposed to be any feelings attached. Besides, this was Elsa. She knew that the blonde was only angry because she was careless with her decisions again.  _Maybe it's for the best_ , she thought as she walked back to her room.

As soon as her door shut, she leaned on her back and slowly slid down to the floor. She was trembling and feeling so cold. Finally acknowledging that she was in love with Elsa and suddenly, the same woman was being distant to her? Her eyes burned and, this time, she couldn't stop it. She hugged her knees and bit her lower lip to try and stifle her own cries.

There was no way she would let Elsa hear that she was crying.

Meanwhile, Elsa couldn't concentrate on her papers anymore. Her elbows were propped up on the table as she rubbed her temples in an attempt to calm down. She knew she was being cold. But knowing that some other girl almost kissed Anna... It was nerve-wracking.

* * *

The longer she couldn't get herself together, the more chances there were for Elsa to think that something was up. Anna knew that for a fact, and she was slowly getting irritated at herself. Usually, she would sit in front of the blonde no matter how busy she was while doing some research. Marveling at Elsa's beauty had always been one of her favorite pastimes. This time though, it only made her heart feel conscious.

"Anna?"

The breath caught on the back of Anna's throat the moment she caught a rhythmical knock on her door. Usually, hearing that would make her beam in delight, but this time, it made her alert. "Y-Yes?!" Anna shrieked, coughing a few times to straighten her voice. She stood from her chair and hastily opened the door. "H-Hi!"

"Hi." Elsa dipped her head and bit her lower lip, seemingly unsure of what to say. "I was... wondering if you're free."

"Now?"

"Yeah."

"Uhm..." Anna swallowed once and looked inside her room, pretending to think about something. "Yeah! Yeah, I'm... free."

"Can I ask you out?"

"D-D-Date?"

"I guess?" Elsa answered uncertainly. "I was thinking... Maybe you want to hang out together? It can be a friendly date or girlfriend date... if you want."

"S-Sure! Uhm... where?" Anna mentally went through her closet; she had to know what to wear. She didn't want to look ridiculous beside Elsa - and she never even cared about that before. Before, she wouldn't mind, but now she wanted to make sure she looked presentable.

"Amusement park... maybe?"

A beaming smile lit up Anna's face at the suggestion, excitement taking over her that she ended up tackling Elsa into a huge bone-crushing hug. She realized a little too late what she just did, and now it would be awkward if she let go.

 _Act normal_ , she reminded herself.

But Elsa was so soft that if Anna wasn't careful, she surely wouldn't be able to let go, especially when she felt a pair of arms wrapped around her protectively. Now that Elsa was hugging her back and seemed like the anger had passed, Anna had to wonder when she started falling. Was that the reason why she would always choose the blonde over someone else? Why she always loved it when Elsa hugged her? When the blonde kissed her on the forehead? Why she hated it when Elsa's attention wasn't on hers?  _She's my best friend_ , she thought.

"I'm sorry," Anna whispered.

"For what?" Elsa asked in an equal hush tone.

"For being reckless. I-I swear nothing happened with that girl." Anna squeezed Elsa once and was rewarded with a soft caress at the back of her head.  _I could get used to this_ , she guiltily noted.

"Just... don't do that again, Anna. I know you get curious easily, but you have to think before you act," Elsa gently admonished. "I'm not mad at you. I'm angry at what you  _did_."

"Sorry..."

"Hey." Elsa pulled back, greeting Anna with a warm and gentle smile. "I'll be fine as long as you don't do anything rash again. Besides, I went a little far too. I mean I tried to... kiss you." Her statement was accompanied by a light blush on her cheeks.

"T-That's," Anna sputtered. "Y-You were just trying to knock some sense into me and... w-were you really about to...?"  _Way to be obvious_ , Anna mentally berated herself.

No matter how many times Elsa tried to prepare herself for that question, it still made her panic the moment it was voiced out. There were no other excuses because she really was about to kiss the redhead that time. If Anna didn't flinch, she could've done it. But she couldn't just say that, right?

"What about it?" Elsa asked instead. Maybe it was the coward's way out, but at least she could hear a response from Anna without revealing anything from her side.

"S-Sorry for... a-avoiding? I was... shocked and y-you looked angry so I thought... but I swear I wasn't going to let that girl kiss me! I was about to push her away but you did it before I can! I-I can't really kiss any other girl but you anyway! I-I mean we're... well, I-I'm comfortable with you a-and... n-nevermind."

Elsa watched as Anna's face turned cherry red, feeling her own face heat up.  _I wonder if you can still say the same thing if I told you how I feel_ , she thought. "I'm flattered, but I still think we should hold that kiss for now."

"A-Anyway! Don't you dare leave without me!"

Elsa giggled as Anna closed the door and shuffled into her room, happy that the girl was slowly going back to normal. She was glad that they had that talked out. It was her who started acting cold anyway; it was only fair for her to take the first step of making up. Elsa sighed and walked back to the living room, waiting for a certain redhead to come out.


	15. Merry-Go-Round

"Elsa, there's a chocolate shop!" Anna pointed excitedly to said shop.

Elsa chuckled, shaking her head fondly as she followed after the enthusiastic girl. Even without going in, she knew that the chocolates were surely sweet and delicious. At least that was what Belle told her. The door and windows were see-through and the designs of each chocolate were intricate, it was almost a waste to actually eat them.

" _Mmm_!" Anna hummed as she ate some free samples offered to her by the girl behind the counter. "Elsa, these are so sweet! I love it!"

Seeing Anna act like usual, Elsa was glad for mustering the courage to ask her out. "Save some for me."

"You're just slow," Anna snorted and took the last piece of chocolate bar, biting on the other edge.

The side of Elsa's lips twitched, threatening to form a scowl. Anna really did take all of it. Sort of. Elsa was tempted to take the chocolate bar that the redhead was munching on.

"Here." Anna offered the piece she took a bite from. "I wasn't planning to eat it all, you know?"

Anna expected Elsa to take the chocolate bar, but she, instead, bit on the other end of it. Like this, with her looking like she was feeding Elsa, Anna's thoughts screeched to a halt. She didn't know what was better: if she didn't accept these more-than-friendly feelings and continuously lived in ignorance, or to accept it and continuously live in fear.

Fear of possibly breaking what they already have.

"Wha—!" Elsa gasped, thanking her reflexes for catching the chocolate. "W-Why did you let go? I was only going to take a bite."

"I-It's fine! I ate almost everything anyway! Y-You..." Anna twiddled with her thumbs. "That's the last piece so... it's yours."

Elsa blinked and watched Anna's fingers do the work.  _She's still uneasy_ , she thought. It was true that she herself still felt bad about that night in the bar, but she asked Anna out to clear the air between them. Was biting the chocolate too fast? It wasn't something new between them. Anna would shove popcorn inside her mouth, for Pete's sake! Besides, Anna thought she was angry. What better way to prove that she wasn't than to act like she normally did?

"You're right. It's sweet." Elsa ate the rest of the chocolate bar.  _Maybe a bunch of chocolates will cheer her up_ , she thought. "I'll go look around. I think I want to buy something." She excused herself and went to check on the other sweets.

Anna watched Elsa disappear behind a shelf. Her entire body was on fire and she was desperate to drink or eat something  _really_ cold, but this was a chocolate shop with nothing but solid chocolates around. The only thing she could do was stand in front of the air conditioner and wonder what to do with herself.

How can this woman whom she had known since forever make her heart race so much? They'd seen each other in their most embarrassing state. Why was she nervous? Where did her confidence go when she needed it the most? Just pretend that nothing was up, how hard can that be?!

 _Get it together_ , she repeated inside her head.

She couldn't risk telling Elsa the truth. Not when the girl clearly stated how they weren't allowed to fall in love. She had never been one to follow the rules, but Elsa was different. That was why even without confessing, she already knew that her feelings wouldn't be returned.

* * *

"No."

"Please?"

"No, Anna."

"You were the one who suggested the theme park!"

Elsa gulped and narrowed her eyes at the monstrosity her best friend liked to call a ride. It was way higher and far more complicated than any kind of roller coaster they had ridden before. Anna had been asking her to ride it together but to no avail.

"You've done it lots of times before!" Anna pointed out, whining.

"Those roller coasters weren't as... high and crazy as this one!" Elsa gestured to the ride. "What if we get stuck on top of that loop?! Or a screw was loose?!"

"They won't open it to the public if it wasn't safe," Anna promised.

"No." Elsa crossed her arms to appear more intimidating. She knew that her riding the roller coaster could help hasten the process of Anna cheering up, but there was absolutely no way she would ride this particular version of it.

Huffing, Anna relented. "Fine. Where do you want to ride?"

Glad that Anna didn't push, Elsa thought it over. They'd been to everything but three. The roller coaster was out of the option, and so she chose to go with one of the two. "That." Elsa pointed to one ride.

"What?!" Anna's jaw dropped. "Elsa, I'd hardly call that a ride!"

"It  _is_ a ride. You asked where I want to ride, and my answer is the carousel."

Anna's face screamed disgust, but Elsa didn't change her mind. She knew that the shorter girl was fine with anything but the carousel. Still. She couldn't resist the urge to tease. Anna had always been forcing her to extreme rides, and though Elsa wasn't exactly planning to ride the carousel, it was fun seeing Anna have an internal debate with herself.

"Okay."

Elsa blinked. "What?"

"You want the carousel? Let's go ride the carousel!" Anna pumped her fist in the air and walked towards the boring ride.

Jaw slackening, Elsa remained implanted on the ground until Anna was close enough to the gate of the merry-go-round. "A-Anna, we don't have to!" Elsa bellowed out as she ran towards the girl, halting Anna in the process.

"Why not? You said you want to."

"That's... But you don't like carousels."

"Do you want to ride it or not?"

When Elsa didn't say anything, a gentle smile graced Anna's lips before she grabbed Elsa's hand and dragged her to the ride. There was a familiar static that shocked her nerves, but this time she knew what it was. It wasn't because of some carpeted flooring or because she was hungry. It was because she was holding Elsa. It was almost strange and laughable in a way. She was teaching Elsa how to treat a girl right, but now, she was starting to think that was wrong. She wanted Elsa to  _be_  treated right. It was Elsa who deserved every love, every touch, every caress, and all the sweetness in the world.

"Why am I the one sitting here?" Elsa held on to the edge of the seat as Anna placed her on the coach-looking chair befitting for a princess.

"Because the other horses are occupied."

"You're riding on one," Elsa deadpanned.

"I want to ride this because it's the only one that moves!" Anna swayed her legs back and forth, eyes focused on Elsa alone. Seriously. How can admitting to herself that she was in love with Elsa make the blonde a thousand times more beautiful than before?

Elsa, on the other hand, was doing her best not to shuffle on her seat. It was a boring ride, but the way Anna gazed at her with  _that_ look sent her mind in its own merry-go-round. In her mind, she wanted to see the redhead sitting in this very chair. She was certain that the girl would fit perfectly because she was cuter and far more charming. Surely, she'd fit the role of a princess more than Elsa would.

"And here I thought you were conscious about everything that involves sports or exercise," Elsa giggled.

"Oh shush! This isn't a real horse and this entire thing goes around so slow, I can barely sweat. I'd hardly call this exercise."

"Riiiight."

Hearing the playful lilt on Elsa's voice, Anna adjusted on the horse and looked straight ahead, unable to look at Elsa.  _What am I going to do_ , she asked herself. She knew she had to stop these feelings, but she couldn't. It was wrong, but it felt so right. It was unsettling, but she liked it.

"By the way," Elsa began. "Why are you calling me 'Elsa'?"

"W-What?" Anna stuttered, inwardly cursing at Elsa's amazing observational skills. "You said we don't have to call each other pet names all the time!"

"Ever since that night?" Elsa wondered. "You stopped calling me 'Elsie' when I dragged you out of that club. Does it have something to do with...?"

"N-No, no!" Anna finally looked at her reluctantly. The truth was that she didn't want to call Elsa by her nickname anymore solely because it reminded her of the fact that they were best friends. "I mean I did something... bad, but it wasn't because of that. I just missed calling you by your real name, that's all."

"Oh," Elsa breathed. Silence settled between them as they simply stared at each other. "Okay, uhm... I see."

"R-Right."

Tearing her gaze away, Anna decided to focus at an empty spot in front of her. Elsa didn't, though. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something off. Her heart swelled at the fact that the girl missed saying her real name, but there was something odd about the excuse. Two reasons, actually. For one, Anna stuttered while explaining something simple. Two, Anna's face was beet red.

"I didn't realize you love my name so much," Elsa blurted, highly amused when the beet red turned a darker shade of crimson.

"W-What?!" Anna spluttered. "That's... yeah! Yeah, I do!" she agreed, and it was Elsa's turn to blush.  _Well, that quickly backfired on me_ , she thought. "Have you listened to your name at all?! It's the most beautiful and unique name ever! I don't know any other Elsa, and I'm going to keep calling you that because it sounds nice and comfortable when it rolls off my tongue!"

Elsa's mouth slightly parted, her eyes settling on Anna who was now breathing heavily. She was only vaguely aware of how the other people were now looking at them. The usual accompany of uneasiness when strangers looked at her was gone. It didn't matter that they now knew her name because, at that moment, she could only see and focus on was Anna.

"T-Thank you?" The answer came out as a question because Elsa wasn't sure what was going on.

Anna blinked a few times, almost surprised by the sudden outburst herself. She looked around the place to see how the people were looking at them. Then, if possible, her face blew up some more along with her ears and neck.

Deciding to give the girl a break, Elsa spoke. "I like 'Anna' too. It's simple and easy to remember, but it's also very beautiful. It doesn't stand out like the other names, but I'd pick it any day."

"Wha...?" Anna blinked, twice. "Y-You're just lazy to remember other names!"

"I'm serious." Elsa grinned. "I think 'Anna' is a beautiful name. Even more than 'Elsa'." Wherever the burst of confidence for compliments came from, Elsa didn't know. But with Anna nearly dissolving into a blubbering mess, she couldn't stop.

For about two minutes.

"I love my name too." Anna grinned and jumped off the horse. She held on to the chair that Elsa was sitting on and leaned closer, looking at her dead in the eye. "But I love it even more when  _you're_ the one saying it." She winked playfully, and then she made a beeline to the gates of the now-steady carousel, leaving a frozen Elsa behind.


	16. Good To You

"Someone's hungry," Elsa noted, the huge grin on her face couldn't be wiped off even if she tried. Anna might not be saying anything but her stomach began growling nonstop the moment she started cooking.

"Am not," Anna grumbled.

"Riiiight." Elsa turned the stove off. "I'm just glad you're not bolting away. You're not going to skip breakfast  _again_ , Anna. I won't let you."

"I wanted to try cooking!"

"Some other time. You already wasted a tray of eggs for your first try," Elsa said, looking sadly at the burned eggs on the side. "I hope you woke me up to ask for help. We could've saved those eggs."

Anna groaned and frowned at the eggs in question. Waking up early in the morning could be the reason for those, but Anna's mind was wandering somewhere else when she was trying. Thinking hard wasn't the best thing to do while cooking, and she had to learn it the hard way.

Her mind kept replaying those stupid and idiotic words she uttered back in the theme park. If her words weren't painfully obvious words of attraction, then she had no idea what was. Saying something like loving how Elsa would call her name looked too obvious, and Anna's hands kept shaking at the very fact that she just dropped a massive hint of her blooming affections for her best friend. Thanks to her internal panic, the poor eggs paid the price.

"Fine," Anna relented. "At least let me prepare those for us. You already did the cooking, and you're probably tired."

"I'm used to cooking, Anna. I'm not tired." The smile that curl on Elsa's lips betrayed her refusal.

It came as a surprise when Elsa woke up with the smell of burning eggs, but what shocked her the most was that Anna was actually trying to cook. It was the first time the girl offered help with kitchen duties.

"Let me," Anna insisted. "I... I think it's about time I learn how to do this, right?"

"Oh?" Elsa tilted her head to the side, suddenly worrying. "Are you alright? You're not sick, are you?"

"I'm not, Elsa, I just want to help," Anna huffed.

"If you say so."

Elsa let Anna take the plates from her and watched every movement, trying to come up with a reason for the sudden change of pace. It was endearing to see Anna do something she wasn't used to, but almost unsettling for Elsa because this wasn't something  _she_  was used to.

"So..." Elsa began to fill in the silence. "Anna, are you okay?"

"Hmm?" Anna's hand hang in midair. "Me? Yeah, I'm good." She bit on the slice of omelet before asking, "Why?"

"You're not saying anything," Elsa said. "If it's about the eggs, I can teach you how to do them someday. Maybe tomorrow."

"No, no. It's just... You're always exhausted. I thought, maybe I should try learning housework so you can... I don't know, relax even for a bit?"

To say that Elsa was shocked would be an understatement, but then her heart suddenly felt too big for her chest. They'd been living together for a long time now and this was the first time Anna mentioned something about helping out. Elsa didn't mind doing everything, but she couldn't deny that if there was a helping hand, it would make things easier around the place.

"Are you sure you're not sick?" Elsa tried to reach out to Anna's forehead, but before she could, the redhead swatted her hands away with a pout. "Okay, okay. But what's with the sudden urge? You never really liked kitchen duties."

"I was just thinking. I mean it's not like I'm good at it anyway." Anna raised a hand to stop Elsa from saying anything more. "I was just feeling guilty. I feel like I wasn't doing anything to help you. Like I'm only being a burden."

"You're not," Elsa promised. "You're never a burden to me, Anna. I do those things because I want to, and you're already helping me more than you know."

"How?"

Something about Anna's tone made Elsa stop chewing on her meal. Did Anna seriously think that she was being a burden? Did Elsa do something that could make her think that way? Well, aside from the issue with drinking too much after her breakup with Hans and that time in the bar. The last thing Elsa would want was to make Anna think that she was worthless.

Especially when that was very far from the truth.

"By just being you," Elsa answered carefully. "Maybe you  _are_ careless and reckless, but you're the only one who can actually make me rest, you know? Whenever I feel like I can still do something, you always notice when I'm pushing myself. It's true, you force your way with me... but it's effective and it does help a lot."

"T-That's..." Anna sputtered, a blush pooling on her cheeks. "Was that supposed to be a compliment?"

"It is. You're fine just the way you are, Anna," Elsa shrugged and took another bite of her meal.

Was she really? Anna decided to drink water and swallow the question along with it. She wanted to force her ideas again because she wasn't convinced. Even if Elsa said that she was fine, Anna couldn't help worrying. If she could do more inside their apartment, Elsa's workload would lessen, giving her more time to rest.

 _I want to help you out as much as I can until you can find someone who can care for you better_ , Anna thought. Maybe she really did have insecurity issues, but she was also aware that she wasn't the best girlfriend material either. None of her previous relationships worked out, after all.

She could be sweet and be caring if she wanted to, but she couldn't do anything for herself. That was why she knew that there were other people out there who would fit Elsa more than her. Someone who was smarter, not impulsive, and more responsible than someone who would forcefully drag Elsa into a fake dating relationship, someone who jumped from one relationship to another, as if the word 'loyal' wasn't a part of her dictionary.

She knew, but it still hurt.

The idea that Elsa would one day be smiling some kind of lovestruck grin while looking deep into another girl's eyes made Anna's stomach twist. If she ever tried to imagine Elsa saying those three words to someone else, she had to fight the prick on the side of her eyes. When she thought of the possibility of Elsa's lips kissing lovingly to someone else's, it made her want to run away.

She wanted to be that woman, but it was impossible. There was always the choice of confessing, but she was afraid of the result. She was afraid to lose what she and Elsa already have.

Anna didn't want to call the fake dating off because to her, it was no longer a pretend. That even if it started out as a way to shape Elsa into the perfect girlfriend, Anna knew that once the deal was cut off, she would end up crying. Probably even more than when she broke up with Hans. But then, staying in the relationship also hurt. It hurts for the same reason. She wasn't pretending anymore... but she knew that Elsa still was.

* * *

Anna suppressed a wince as she cleaned her cut because of her recent attempt at making dinner.  _I guess people don't become chefs instantly just because they fell in love_. If things worked that way, it wouldn't be this hard. Maybe she should've listened to her mother back when she was a child. Choosing to drag Elsa away to take in the sight of cute little ducklings over her mother's cooking lessons was... worth it.

Now that she thought about it, she would always run to Elsa whenever her mother would try to drill some feminine 'responsibilities' inside her head. She didn't regret it so much because a time spent with Elsa was always worth it, but it was also because of that that she ended up being completely worthle—

"Anna?"

Anna stopped reminiscing the moment she heard the familiar voice, and she turned around to see Elsa looking around the kitchen in confusion. The action made her blush because, admittedly, she had no idea what she was doing.

"You're cooking again?" Elsa asked as she scanned the counter.

"Trying to." Anna rinsed off some residue left from the soap. Thank goodness she was used to having cuts and bruises as a child. At least she wasn't shocked when she sliced herself with a knife.

Elsa couldn't decide if she wanted to swoon or to stay awake to continuously gawk at Anna who was currently wearing an apron. It was the first time she ever saw the redhead wear it, and it was one of her guilty imaginations. She had always fantasized the girl wearing an apron, cooking for her, and she would have only stared if the way Anna washed her hands didn't snap her back to reality.

Feeling protective, Elsa ran to Anna's side. "You cut yourself?"

"Don't remind me," Anna groaned. "I'm really not cut out for this, am I?"

"Not if you give up easily," Elsa chided. "Anna, if you're only doing this to help out, I'm telling you it wasn't a burden to me. I like doing it for both of us."

"I know. But I also want to do it... for you. A-And besides, it could help if I get hungry, right? I can't always depend on you!"

 _I don't mind if you depend on me_. Elsa bit her lip to stop herself from saying it out loud, knowing it was impractical. Anna was right; she couldn't depend on Elsa forever. Even if Elsa wouldn't mind, being independent was good. It would help her feel more at ease whenever she'd go home late and knew that Anna could whip up a meal that was homemade. It was much healthier than eating outside food.

"You could've waited for me," Elsa pointed out.

"I know, I know. But you might say something about me not needing to do it. You know, like what you just did?" Anna poked her fingers to see if there was still blood. "I was... I was actually hoping to come up with something before you come home."

"Oh? Do you want me to go out again? I can pretend that I didn't see anything." She giggled when Anna shot her a glare.

"Very funny."

"For the record," Elsa began, "when I first tried cooking, I cut myself five times in the first minute."

Anna stared dumbly for a second. "You're pulling my leg."

"Am I? Remember that time my hand was covered in bandages?" Elsa tilted her head to the side and grinned when Anna's eyebrows shot up to her hairline. "That was the end result of trying to cook for the first time. You can ask mama if you want."

Anna only gazed at her in mild disbelief, while Elsa didn't bother averting her gaze. If this happened weeks ago, she would've already snapped her eyes elsewhere. But there was this feeling in her chest right now that was telling her not to. Almost as if she was... allowed to stare.

"You can laugh," Elsa promised with a smile when she noticed Anna's lips quivering a little. Not a moment later, the redhead did end up laughing.

The sound and sight made Elsa feel embarrassed, but she couldn't bring herself to shy away. Anna had been way too tensed lately and she wanted her to lighten up. If sharing a stupid experience from the past would make her feel completely comfortable again, Elsa wouldn't mind looking like an idiot.

"What were you planning to make? I'll help you." Elsa grabbed another chopping board and knife from the drawer and placed it on top of the kitchen counter. Before Anna could retort, she raised the knife to stop her. "Just this once, for you to learn the basics. I still expect you to cook for me someday, though."

"T-That's... Fine. J-Just don't laugh or say anything mean. I might not be the best student when it comes to cooking."

"Do you honestly think I don't have the patience for you? Besides, everyone was born an amateur. I wasn't good at cooking too, okay? That's why we learn."

Anna's heart threatened to break her ribs the more she looked at Elsa grinning. It wasn't even the first time she ever saw that bright smile and was helped out. Heck, Elsa was the one who helped her learn a lot of things. It was just embarrassing because Anna was truly planning to cook for her. Knowing that Elsa was now expecting it too...

"F-Fine."


	17. Stutter

With a finger tapping on top of the dining table, Elsa tried to come up with something as Anna hugged her knees and desperately wanted to curl herself into a ball on their couch, embarrassed about the result of her very first meal. No matter how many times Elsa comforted her, it did little to cheer her up.

It only made her more depressed.

Sighing, Elsa stepped into the kitchen and made hot chocolates for both of them. It always cheered Anna up before, and maybe it could work this time too. If not, she would have to come up with something else. What other things could make Anna calm down? Why was she embarrassed in the first place? Was she that against the idea of failing? Elsa didn't mind, but it looked like Anna did. Why? It wasn't the first time she failed to do something. What was different now?

"Hot chocolate?" Elsa offered, wearing a smile that faltered when Anna merely hugged her knees closer to her body and whimpered. Elsa settled the mugs on top of the coffee table and sat beside the sulking girl. "Anna, I told you it was fine. It's not like we wasted the food."

"It was salty," Anna said, voice muffled by her knees.

"So what? It was still edible," Elsa reasoned. "I wasn't expecting it to be perfect, you know? It's rare to do something so well on the first try. Unless you had a hidden talent for cooking, there's nothing to get embarrassed about," she promised, but Anna didn't say anything.

In all honesty, Anna was glad because even though Elsa was honest enough to admit what went wrong, she was still kind enough to eat it. But it was embarrassing because she knew her own blunder and she hated herself so much for it. She wanted to cook something delicious for Elsa but ended up serving a beef stew that was very salty, she'd rather eat a bowl of salt instead.

"Wha...!" Anna squeaked and snapped her head to the side to see a huge grin on Elsa. She frowned and tried to curl herself into a ball, only to have the blonde poke her sides again. "Elsa!" she huffed, but Elsa's eyes simply glinted mischievously. "Don't you da- EEK!"

It took all of Anna's strength not to laugh. She tried to swat Elsa's hands away but failed miserably, ending up laughing uncontrollably as Elsa mercilessly tickled her.

"E-Elsa! S-Stop! Please!" Anna managed in between laughs. She was already lying down on the sofa with her face extremely red; a mixture of laughing so much and the embarrassment that it was Elsa doing the tickling.

Mercifully, Elsa stopped her ministrations and Anna gasped for air. She took a few deep breaths to calm down, barely able to make out that Elsa was on top of her.  _Give me a break_ , she groaned while still trying to get herself together.

"Anna." Once she had calm down, Anna slowly opened her eyes to meet Elsa's. "Don't worry so much about it. It wasn't perfect, but it wasn't terrible either. I really appreciate it, you know?"

Anna snapped her eyes to the side again. "You're just saying that."

"Am I?" Elsa smiled when Anna looked at her with worried eyes. "I'm serious, Anna. I mean it."

Anna closed her eyes and inhaled sharply. "That's so unfair. It's just... I really want to help... in a way I  _know_ I'm helping. I thought I can do something about cooking, but I failed and you had to make do with something so salty even when you're already exhausted from school."

"You didn't fail, Anna. Knowing that you're trying to do something you're not used to just to help me is more than I could ever ask for."

"I... I promise I'll... I'll cook something better for you. B-But it might take a while."

A warmth that she couldn't describe erupted inside Elsa's chest. This kind of insistence from Anna was  _vastly_ different from the other times she tried to do something. Usually, if Anna failed something, she'd bounce back on her own. Now, Elsa couldn't believe what she was seeing. She couldn't believe how downhearted Anna became from failing with something when she only did it once - twice if they would count the breakfast.

"I will." Elsa smiled. "I will wait for you, Anna, no matter how long."

Anna's trembling fingers stopped shaking as she took in the way Elsa was looking at her. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something about those words that made her feel... different. She would think about it more, but she couldn't concentrate much because she was suddenly hyper-aware of how Elsa was still on top of her.

"Elsa?"

"Hmm?"

"You're still sitting on me."

Elsa blinked a couple of times. The confused look on her face almost made Anna laugh, but she wanted to wear a poker face as she waited for Elsa's inevitable blushing face and spluttering reaction.

"Sorry!" Elsa squeaked, jumping off from Anna's lying body. "Oh my god! I'm sorry! I-I didn't notice!"

"It's fine." Anna lifted herself up into a sitting position. "You weren't heavy... which is a little surprising. I thought you were since you're taller than me."

"Or maybe you're getting healthier and stronger." Elsa pinched the bridge of her nose and breathed deeply for a minute. "I'm really sorry, Anna."

"Elsa, it's okay. Now, can I help you wash the dishes?"

"What?"

"I failed at cooking, but maybe I'll have better luck washing dishes. I was able to serve the plates no problem, right? Maybe I can have the same luck when it comes to cleaning them."

"You didn't fail at cooking, Anna," Elsa insisted, and Anna rolled her eyes. "We can wash the dishes together, but only if you stop calling it a failure."

"But it  _is_ a failure!" Anna flailed her arms around, but the frown on Elsa's face deepened. "Okay, so it's edible even if it's salty. Fine, fine. I can't believe I'm begging you to accept my offer of washing the dishes."

"You're not begging. I only want you to stop calling your efforts a failure, that's all," Elsa said more calmly this time, offering a hand to Anna. "Come on. Those dishes won't wash on their own."

* * *

Apparently, Anna was right regarding having better luck when dealing with the utensils. That was to say, Elsa let her handle drying them for now. It was probably unnerving for the redhead to be the one drying and not actually washing, but Elsa managed to convince her that it was just as important.

"I'm only doing this because I actually see you do it." Anna was still pouting, irritated that she didn't get the original job she wanted to do. "But next time you have to let me wash."

"I know, and I will," Elsa promised. "You've done them before, but mostly just a piece or so. You already know how to do it."

Anna smiled at the compliment that ignited something within her. She started drying the dishes with zeal while humming to a random tune. Had she known it would be fun doing these things with Elsa, she would've volunteered long ago. She only went against the idea for it because she thought it was a boring and tedious task. But when done with someone special, it could actually be entertaining and fun.

"Anna?" Elsa called after drying her hands on the towel.

"Yeah?" Anna placed the silverware and utensils in their respective places before looking at Elsa.

"Are you still worried? You did a great job helping me out today, and I'm really serious about that."

"I know," Anna agreed. "I did tell you, right? If it's you saying it, I know you're telling the truth," she giggled, and then she sighed. "It's just... you said that if I force myself on you, it worked. But I don't want to force myself on you all the time. It makes me feel like... well, like I'm just forcing you?"

"Even if I tell you that's not it?"

"I believe you, Elsa. I really do. But it's mostly just for me. I want to be able to help you without worrying you so much. Like when I burned those eggs, or when I cut my fingers. Someday, I want to be able to cook while you just sit down and watch, not nervous about the way I do it."

Anna was biting her lower lip, her cheeks glowing, her eyebrows were furrowing together, her eyes staring at her toes, and her thumbs twiddling. Elsa knew then that Anna was genuinely worried and nervous. Those were her habits whenever she would be.

"Anna..."

"A-Actually, forget it! It's probably me being curious or impulsive again!" Anna chuckled nervously, tucking an invisible hair behind her ear. "L-Let's forget about it, okay? I'm sorry, I—"

Anna stopped breathing when Elsa placed a soft and gentle kiss on her forehead.  _W-Wha-What is going on?!_ It was the only question running inside her head.

"Thank you." Elsa guided Anna's head to the crook of her neck. "I don't know why, but thank you."

"H-Hey! I also have a sweet bone in my body!" Anna explained a tad too nervously, wanting and also not wanting to push herself away. "I can do something I set my mind to!"

"I know." Elsa laughed, and then she pulled back to face Anna again. "Can I ask you something?"

"What?" Anna wondered, curious, but Elsa only stayed silent. "What is it?"

"Is it okay if we sleep together tonight?"

"What?!" Anna spluttered, the heat flooding her cheeks once more. "N-Not that I'm complaining, b-but... y-you're asking me?"

"I... can sleep well when I'm with you," Elsa explained shyly, her pale cheeks slowly turning pinkish.

Anna's mouth opened in hopes to say something, but she didn't know what. She closed it again, swallowing for the nth time to calm her nerves. Her eyes kept darting here and there, but every time they landed on Elsa, she would see the blonde still looking at her.

"A-Are you sure?" Anna asked as she started fiddling with her fingers.

"I am." Elsa smiled, but then her smile faltered a little. "But if you're not, m-maybe some other time? I mean... we haven't slept together for a while."

It wasn't always that Elsa would ask to sleep together. The one who would always be clingy was Anna, not the other way around. Not to mention, these feelings inside of her only grew stronger with each passing second. Could she catch a wink of sleep with Elsa like this? But Elsa said she could sleep well beside her. If it would only be this once, maybe it would be fine? If it could help Elsa sleep more comfortably... maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

"Okay," Anna said with a voice barely above a whisper. "I'm okay with it. I-If you want..."

For a moment, Elsa only stared. Anna tried her best not to wiggle as she was slowly drawn to Elsa's eyes. Then, there was a skip inside her chest when Elsa's lips curled into what was probably the sweetest smile she ever donned.

"I want to."


	18. Grilled Chicken

Anna narrowed her eyes at the chicken on top of the kitchen island, wondering if she could already do something like grilling it. There was such a thing as grilling it too much, after all. The last thing she wanted was to serve a pile of charcoal to the blonde. For sure, Elsa would be going home tired again, and Anna was determined to cook something perfect before she arrived.

"Come on, Anna. Stop panicking. You were born for this moment." Anna lost count of how many times she already said it.

Ever since that little episode of serving a rather salty meal, Anna became afraid of touching any ingredient again when Elsa was around. She preferred to try and cook when she was alone. Besides, she wasn't terrible enough that she'd make a water explode.

In the end, Anna ate everything she cooked because she wasn't satisfied and didn't want to make Elsa eat another one of her failures. But this time, Anna was determined. Maybe if she cooked Elsa's favorite, she'd force herself more than ever just to make sure not to fail. She had enough cuts and burns, right? Maybe some mystical being behind those scars would grace her with the skill of grilling a chicken perfectly. As long as she wouldn't fail on that, the side dishes were easy.

Anna gasped when she heard the telephone ring. For a moment, she was glad for the meddlesome soul. Maybe talking to someone would ease the jitters. She just hoped in all hopes that it wouldn't be Elsa. There was a high possibility that it wouldn't be her anyway since she would always message or call Anna's phone instead.

"Hello?" Anna asked after picking up the phone.

" **How's my little girl?** "

The term of endearment caused Anna to cringe. "I'm not a little girl, mom." Anna picked up the wireless phone and used it as she walked back to the kitchen. "What is it? Did something happen?"

" **I was just wondering how those sparkles were doing.** "

Anna blushed. It was back when Belle visited and her mother called to say something about Olaf's birthday invitation. Back then, Anna was already experiencing those weird jitters whenever Elsa was around. She couldn't remember when it started happening, but because she was curious, she told her mother about it.

Anna told her about how Elsa would continuously glow, how those loud jingling bells wouldn't go away, and she also asked what they all meant. Bulda ended up laughing and bluntly told her that she was jealous that Elsa's attention wasn't on her. Anna, at first, denied and insisted that it was only because they were friends. Clearly, her mother didn't believe her.

"It's doing fine." Anna turned the speaker on, deciding to do something about the chicken. For sure, her mother wouldn't stop anytime soon. Might as well multitask.

" **Elsie said you've been trying to cook lately?** "

"Wha—"

" **I kept asking her about you, and you know that.** " Anna could almost see her mother roll her eyes. " **I didn't tell her about your sparkles.** "

"Mom! Will you please stop it?" Anna groaned and covered her face. "And why didn't you ask me about it? There's no need to bother her!"

" **Hon, you didn't even tell me about it. Besides, it's funny hearing things from her perspective.** " Bulda laughed. " **So did you tell her yet? I'm excited to have her as an official daughter!** "

"Oh my god, mom! That's not going to happen, okay?!" Anna hissed, ignoring the way her heart throbbed at her own statement. "Elsa only sees me as a sister. That's- It's already weird enough that I... that I l-lo... It's not going to happen!"

" **How can you be so sure?** "

It took everything that Anna had not to tell Bulda about her deal with Elsa. The chances of the blonde feeling the same was close to zero. Elsa repeatedly stated how childhood friends shouldn't even kiss or that going out with Anna was weird. She had said it countless times enough to be imprinted in Anna's heart and mind. Elsa practically sees her as a sister, and there was nothing she could do about that.

"I just am." Anna knew she didn't stand a chance, but Elsa was very sweet and gentle that Anna couldn't help hoping. Even if there was even the slightest bit of chance, no matter how small, she wanted to hope that there could be more to them than just friendship. She wanted to be Elsa's  _real_ girlfriend, but...

" **I still want her for you. I was planning to talk to Gerda about your wedding. I'm sure she'll be just as excited!** " Bulda enthusiastically informed.

"What the hell, mom?! Don't tell mama!" Anna panicked. "We're not going to get married! T-That's close to impossible and Elsa- She's sweet, but there's no way she'll fall for me. We grew up together!"

" **You're a living proof that it's not impossible to fall for a childhood friend,** " her mother noted. " **And since when did the word 'impossible' enter your dictionary? You did many nearly impossible things before, Anna.** "

"And you got mad because of it."

" **True, but aren't you glad I'm not angry about this one? If you're going to be gay, I'm glad it was for Elsie. I know her like I know you, hon, and I like her for you.** "

"It doesn't matter, mom. Elsa doesn't feel the same way," Anna said softly and decided to start grilling the damn chicken. She hoped that this bitterness inside of her wouldn't spread to the meal she was about to cook for her mother's preferred daughter-in-law.

* * *

Elsa and Belle sighed. Their surprisingly calm demeanor always managed to fool the other students who study the same course.

"At least we've gotten that off the way." Belle leaned on the wall. "I can't believe I survived this semester with him as my professor."

"You sound like we're done. We still have the final papers to submit. I need to finish those."

"Elsa, those won't be submitted in a month. I know he gave it to us early in the semester, but don't tell me you've been working on it every day?"

"Nearly." Elsa shrugged, ignoring the stunned look on the brunette's face. "I want to submit it early. I was hoping to go home for the birthday of Anna's little brother."

"Speaking of Anna. Are you done with  _that_  yet?"

Sighing, Elsa looked at the paper bag she was holding, hearing the tiny jingles from within. Ever since Anna tried to cook for her, she had this urge to do something for the redhead too. Something that was a little out of her comfort zone. She was already used to doing things for Anna, but never this... stuff.

"Made five terrible attempts," Elsa bitterly admitted.

"I hope you didn't throw them away. You can still use them." Belle narrowed her eyes at the bag. "I can help you out again if you want. Show me those five pieces and I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you, but I want to do it myself."

Belle rolled her eyes. "I didn't say I'll do it. I said I'll see what I can do. By help, I mean I can give you pieces of advice and tell you what you did wrong. Unless you don't want other people seeing your mistakes, fine."

Elsa thought about the offer. She didn't have any issue with failing in front of someone, and she was the one who came up to Belle and asked if she had any idea how to make anything handmade. The girl was surprisingly artistic and was more than happy to help.

"Can you help now?" Elsa asked,

"Now? As in  _now_?" Belle wondered, and Elsa nodded. "In case you don't remember, we have ourselves some free time. You're really giving this your all, huh? Excited to give it to her?"

"I don't want to waste any more materials."

"Won't Anna get jealous? I mean it's your choice whether you want to do it in your apartment, mine, or somewhere else. We can do it in yours, but then it wouldn't surprise her anymore, right? Unless we do it in your room."

"Jealous..." Elsa repeated, still reluctant to believe it.

It was true she could notice some of Anna's actions lately, but do they mean anything? Those blushes and stuttering, those were things Anna never did around her before. Sure, it led her to think that  _maybe_ Anna could be jealous if she was with Belle, but there was also a big chance that she wasn't. What if Anna only felt embarrassed because she couldn't cook right? What if she only stuttered because she was feeling insecure about being a 'burden'?

Elsa frowned. It felt like something stabbed her when she casually made herself believe that it was the latter, but she didn't care. She disliked it when Anna would think of such absurdity. It didn't matter if she didn't feel the same way; Elsa wouldn't have any of Anna's insecurities. It was misplaced. Wrong.

"I swear if you keep being in denial, I'll shove those materials inside your mouth," Belle threatened. "I don't know what kind of excuse you'll come up with, but you have to tell her something."

Elsa pressed her lips together and, after thinking about it for some time, nervously picked up her phone and dialed Anna's number. A few rings later and there was an audible  _click_.

" **Hello?** "

Hearing Anna's voice brought a smile to Elsa's lips. "Hi."

" **Hey, what's up?** "

"Are you cooking?"

" **W-What? What kind of sorcery is this?!** "

"I don't know. I get the feeling." Elsa furrowed her brows when there were loud clattering of utensils from the other end. "You didn't cut yourself, did you?"

" **Nope. I can handle it fine now,** " Anna said with surprisingly cheerful voice. " **It didn't turn out well, though.** "

"Oh? What did you make?"

" **Charcoal.** " Anna replied, and before Elsa could ask her to elaborate, she continued, " **Anyway, they're just a pile of charcoal now. Sorry, but it looks like you need to settle on sandwiches for dinner.** "

Elsa felt a shadow looming over her. There was a side of her that wanted to go home and cheer Anna up for another failure, but then she also wanted to do something about her gift for the girl. Both choices were for Anna's sake, and she couldn't choose.

"I can come up with something." Elsa tried to remember if they had sufficient ingredients in the fridge. There was a variety of them, and she hoped that Anna didn't try to mix them all over... something she was cooking. "And I was thinking... Can Belle come over?" she asked, ignoring the surprise that appeared on Belle's face.

" **Wha...?** " Anna paused. " **Why?** "

"Our professor told us that what we submitted earlier was the last prompt report," Elsa explained in half-truth. "We could celebrate together? Or would it be better if we go somewhere else?"

The moment the words fell out of her mouth, Elsa held her breath. Anna remained silent and the suspense was killing her. She tried to listen to any subtle sound, but there was none, not even a breathing noise. She didn't know what expression Anna wore, and that set her on edge.

" **I don't think it's appropriate for me to celebrate with you, Elsa,** " Anna said after some time. " **I'm not a part of your report, plus the kitchen is a mess right now. I can come up with something to eat for myself.** "

"I can clean it up," Elsa offered.

" **I can't depend on you forever. It's a mess I made myself. I have to clean it up,** " Anna insisted. " **I can at least do this much. You should go celebrate now. Enjoy, but don't go home late, okay? You're still a girl.** "

"Okay," Elsa relented. "Don't stay up late. It's bad for the skin and you'll look like a zombie." Elsa mentally frowned. Why couldn't she just be completely honest?

" **Says the one who always stays up late.** "

"It's why I'm warning you. I know what it feels like, and it's not nice. I'll... I'll try to come home early. Don't tire yourself out, okay?"

" **Yes, mom,** " Anna said mockingly. " **Don't stay out too late. I know you have a car, but it's still not safe for two girls to roam around!** "

Elsa swore she melted after hearing the clear sound of worry and care in Anna's voice. "I know. I'll see you later... or tomorrow, in case you're sleeping when I come home."

" **Okay.** " A moment of silence fell upon them, with no one daring to end the call. The truth was that Elsa didn't want it to end. She was hoping that Anna would be the one to do it because she knew she couldn't end it. " **End the call, Elsa!** " Anna whined, giggling when they let the silence loom for longer than necessary.

"You end it. I don't want to." Elsa blushed when she saw Belle's face turning red, shoulders shaking violently as she tried to stifle her laughter.

" **You're paying for it, you know? You were the one who called.** "

Elsa cringed. Stupid bills. "Fine," Elsa sighed. "I'll... see you, Anna."

" **Later.** "

* * *

Anna's phone was still pressed against her ear, listening to nothing because the beeping sound died a few seconds (maybe even minutes) ago. She nibbled on her lower lip, trying her damnedest to convince herself that she did the right thing. That even when it freaking hurts, it was still the right thing.

"Have fun..." Anna whispered, but it sounded too loud for her liking.

Here, in the huge apartment that she and Elsa lived in, she was alone. In front of the dining table with two grilled chickens on top of it, she was alone. Maybe it wasn't a nice step to tell Elsa that she failed again, but then she was also relieved. It would be awkward for Belle to come with only two chickens in place. But now, she was alone and doomed to eat these all by herself fast enough so Elsa wouldn't see them. Maybe she should really burn them so they'd practically be charcoal like how she described it to Elsa. But of course, it was only a fleeting thought. Anna didn't have the heart to throw away good food.

Anna smiled sadly and took a slice of the chicken. She slowly, shakily closed the distance between the fork and her quivering lips. Then, as she took the meat inside her mouth, a single tear fell, followed by many others.

How can something so delicious taste so bitter now?


	19. What Of It?

Wobbling on her legs, Elsa stumbled her way to the living room. Maybe wanting to finish fast wasn't the best idea. It triggered mental stress and numb fingers, much to Belle's dismay. Thankfully, the brunette was kind enough to let her get her way, also wanting to go home fast. Only, it wasn't as fast as they initially thought.

"Talk about looking like a zombie."

Elsa stilled and saw Anna sitting in front of their coffee table. It was then that she noticed how the living room was a mess. Papers, papers, and papers everywhere. If she wasn't exhausted, she could've chided the girl. But no. At that moment, she was just glad to see Anna still awake and greeting her with a warm smile.

"You're still up." Elsa frowned halfheartedly as she walked her way to the couch.

"Couldn't sleep." Anna shrugged, half-expecting Elsa to sit on the sofa. She was pleasantly surprised when the blonde took the spot beside her and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. "You're getting used to that," Anna playfully noted, hoping that the slight waver in her voice was simply her imagination.

"I'm not allowed to?"

"It's fine." Anna decided to busy her hand with her drawings. "I was the one who told you to try and initiate contact anyway."

Sometimes, Anna couldn't help but hate her past self. If only she didn't force this deal on Elsa, maybe she wouldn't be this messed up. She could always call it off, sure, but she never goes back on her promises. Especially promises made to Elsa. It would be unfair if she ut the deal off when Elsa didn't have anyone special to her yet.

If only Elsa would just tell her that she liked Belle...

Anna didn't like it, but at least it could save her any more heartache in the future. She admitted that Elsa coming home for her sake was very tempting, but she also knew she had to give Elsa a chance to mingle with someone who wasn't her. If Elsa chose Belle to hang out with, she couldn't do anything about that, but she didn't want to see it happen in front of her. The last time they were all together, Elsa's attention was on the brunette. She didn't want a repetition of that.

"So how did it go? Did you have fun? Where did you eat?"

"Something French. I'm not sure, but it was Belle's favorite restaurant," Elsa shrugged. "It was delicious, but I think I prefer Italian."

"I see." Anna forced a tiny smile and continuously drew something.

"Did you eat?" Elsa asked. "I can try to cook something."

"No need. I managed to make something simple," Anna promised, not wanting Elsa to worry.

"I'm sorry," Elsa apologized, lowering her head in shame.

"For what?"

"I should've cooked something for you to heat up," Elsa admitted.

 _Why did you spend your time with Belle then?_ Anna cursed herself. She shouldn't be too possessive because Elsa wasn't hers. "I'm not a child anymore, Elsa. I can come up with my own dish. You said so yourself. It wasn't perfect, but at least it's edible."

Anna went back to drawing. She was glad that Elsa would worry about her even when she was already too exhausted, but it was also making her feel bad. She knew that Elsa had always been caring. She was just that kind of girl. But Anna was having a hard time dealing with her own feelings when Elsa kept acting this way.

It was almost impossible not to love her.

Back when they were in high school, Elsa would only feel at ease around her. It usually made her proud, but the display of the same act back when Belle came over made her feel terribly anxious. She couldn't get the events of that day out of her mind. Everything she thought was exclusive only to her, it was given to the brunette that day. Now, Elsa went to celebrate something ridiculous with Belle. _Just tell me you like her already_ , she pleaded inside her head.

"I still wanted to cook for you." Anna jumped when Elsa leaned her head on her shoulders. "How long are you going to draw? It's getting late."

"Five more pages," Anna managed to push past the lodge on her throat. "You should sleep, Elsa. You're tired. Again."

"I'll wait. I don't want to sleep when you're still doing that."

"I don't pull an all-nighter as much as you do." Anna tried to be comical. "We don't sleep in the same room anyway. Just go to your room, close your eyes, sleep and dream about something cool!"

"But I'm tired of dreaming..."

The statement made Anna look at Elsa as much as their position could allow it and saw how Elsa's eyes were already closed, her chest rising and falling at a slow and steady pace.  _She fell asleep_ , Anna sighed inwardly. She knew she had to wake Elsa up. She couldn't carry her because she wasn't strong enough, but knowing just how exhausted Elsa was made her hesitate.

"You don't play fair, Elsa..."

* * *

Elsa rubbed the sleep from her eyes and was unable to stifle a long yawn, snapping back to reality when she heard a light giggle. "S-Sorry. Did I sleep on you?" Elsa smiled shyly.

"Slept and drooled, yes," Anna giggled and pointed to her sleeve, effectively making Elsa blush and barely able to register that Anna wasn't wearing a camisole but a shirt.

"S-Sorry!" Elsa shrieked, heavily embarrassed.

"It's fine. If you want to drool, go ahead. I won't judge," Anna said, fixing her papers and art materials.

"I didn't do it on purpose!"

"Duh! You were sleeping, Elsa." Anna placed all her pencils inside the pencil case. "Anyway, I'm done with the drawings for now. I can't carry you to your room so I had to wake you up."

"Why didn't you wake me earlier?" Elsa asked more calmly this time.

"You looked exhausted." Anna picked up her stuff before standing. "You should go to bed. It's more comfortable there."

Elsa blinked and looked around, now fully realizing that she was still in the living room. Her mind started to show her the events of the last few... hours? How she rushed that 'celebration' with Belle in order to come home early to spend time with Anna.  _I did, but I was unconscious_ , she bitterly thought. Of all the times to fall asleep, it had to be when she was with Anna. How pathetic could she be?

"Do you..." Elsa hesitated as she pushed herself up. "D-Do you want to... to sleep together?"

Anna's heart skipped a beat at the nervous way Elsa asked to sleep together again. The last time she agreed, she wasn't able to sleep. Sleeping beside the woman she was in love with took its toll on her, but she was glad that Elsa was able to sleep well. However, at that moment, she would like to avoid it as much as she could. She was already in too deep and was afraid to fall deeper.

It was scary.

Normally, she would've jumped in without much thought. That was her way of life. But now, she didn't want to do it when Elsa was involved. These feelings inside of her grew more and more with each passing day, and if she didn't do anything about it fast, she would surely break. Maybe... Maybe she had to take matters into her own hands.

"Sorry," Anna smiled apologetically. "I want to sleep alone for now. I'm tired and I might move a lot while sleeping. I don't want to wake you."

"Oh." The hurt that glinted in Elsa's eyes nearly made Anna take it back. "O-Okay. Uhm... good night?"

"Good night, Elsa." Anna smiled and walked back to her room, trying hard not to look back and hug Elsa, tell her that it was fine to sleep together. She knew that if she did, she would be having a harder time dealing with her own feelings.

Anna had to do something about it, but it didn't have to be a confession. She knew that Elsa doesn't feel the same way. Even when the blonde would always be kind to her, Elsa's interactions with Belle was proof enough that she wasn't anyone special. Honestly, what was the difference between her and the brunette? That she knew Elsa longer? That she was the best friend? That she was the 'girlfriend'?

What of it?

Elsa wasn't much when dealing with strangers, but she was able to get comfortable around Belle in a span of a few months. That was saying something. If Elsa felt at ease with Belle, then Anna would gladly hand her over. At least she had a glimpse of what the brunette was like. Even though she didn't like how Belle would glare at her, at least she knew that Elsa was comfortable around the girl.

* * *

Elsa was staring directly at dark green orbs, her mind blanking out the moment she saw him standing with all his glory outside their unit.

"Long time no see, Elsa."

With her mind running a million thoughts at once for any possible reason why he was here, Elsa wasn't able to respond. Every single one of the reasons she could come up with led to one thought alone. He was in their apartment for one reason alone.

"Hans?!"

Elsa's head snapped to the side to see Anna wearing nothing but her camisole and short shorts. Anna's face immediately flushed, and she covered herself with both hands.

"What the hell?! You could've sent me a message!" Anna bolted off to her room, leaving Elsa to deal with... Hans.

If it wasn't for her touching the doorknob, Hans would probably notice how Elsa's hand was trembling. She didn't like it when other people see Anna in those revealing clothes. Most especially when it was a guy. A guy who used to be Anna's boyfriend.

"Come in." Elsa opened the door for the guy to enter.

Hans' lopsided smile didn't go away as he entered the unit without any reservations, sending something crawling at the back of Elsa's neck. She wanted to ask why he was here, but he wasn't her visitor. He was here for Anna. But why? The answer to that was something Elsa wanted to know but was afraid to know as well.

"Back!" Anna greeted. "So, uhm! Well, you both know each other. I'm pretty sure no more introductions needed," she laughed nervously, and both greeted each other with a simple  _hello_. "R-Right! Then... shall we?" Anna asked as she looked at Hans.

Elsa slowly,  _slowly_ looked at Hans who was still standing proudly, looking at Anna longer than deemed appropriate. Elsa could tell that look in his eyes. It wasn't predatory; it was gentle, loving and longing. He still liked Anna, that was for sure.

"Going somewhere?" Both redheads looked at Elsa when she asked.

"No, no. We're just..." Anna stopped. "We actually have a project for school. Finals. We're paired up. I thought he wouldn't come until much later."

"Yeah, about that." Hans offered a folder to the female redhead. "Ms. Mode said to give you this. I don't like carrying other people's stuff so I decided to come early. Hope you don't mind."

"Wait. Isn't this available until next week?" Anna took the envelope while raising an eyebrow.

"Second week of the month, Anna. Not two weeks before the month ends." Hans flicked the girl's forehead, earning a shriek.

The action made something in Elsa snap. Anna and Hans looked at the taller girl when they  _actually_ heard something snapped. The female redhead's eyes lowered and saw Elsa's hand which was clutching on a pen that was now split in half.

"Elsa, that was expensive!" Anna took Elsa's hand in hers to check the pen. "Isn't this your favorite pen? What happened?"

"It's fine. I have spares." Elsa took her hand back and licked her dry lips. "I'll leave you two alone. Still need to finish some papers." Without waiting for a response, Elsa went back to the dining table and forced herself to concentrate on her papers.

It was awkward enough that all three of them were in the same room, but then Hans had to be touchy-feely with Anna. She knew it wouldn't do well to think too much of it, but she couldn't help it. Out of all of Anna's exes, Hans was the only one who kept coming back into their lives, intentional or not.

"She looked angry," Hans commented, making sure that Elsa wouldn't hear.

"Well, it's you," Anna said nonchalant, and Hans chuckled. "Just don't do anything that could easily cross the line, and maybe you'd be lucky not to have your head off. She was really angry when we broke up."

"Have you told her yet?" Hans opened up his bag and pulled out his laptop.

"Are you crazy?!" Anna whispered harshly. "She's my best friend, Hans! It could ruin us forever if I did!"

Hans brought out his tablet. "What if she likes you too?"

"She only sees me as a sister." Anna sat beside Hans, making sure she can see Elsa from the dining table. "A-And I... I don't think I can take it if she rejects me."

"Have you seen the way she looked at me? It looked like she wanted to bury me alive. Sure, I did a real dick move, but you already know why I did it," Hans scoffed. "You didn't tell her you were gay?"

"I didn't get a chance to." Anna frowned and gave her USB to the guy. "Besides, she was probably just being protective. I've been with a lot of guys before, with you being the most recent, in case you forgot."

"How can I forget? It's the first time I made someone mine, but their thoughts were always of someone else." Hans laughed when Anna playfully punched him on the shoulder.

Such actions didn't go unnoticed by Elsa. The dining table was still visible from the living room, and she could also see the duo just as much as the duo could see her. Elsa couldn't hear what they were talking about, but this show of flirting was definitely making her uneasy. It took everything she had not to bolt over there and kick that guy out of their apartment.

Elsa didn't like it.

She didn't like Hans intruding in their lives again, but she also didn't like what she was slowly becoming. It was almost as if she was starting to feel like a  _real_ girlfriend, getting jealous and wanting to be possessive. She didn't want anyone to flirt with Anna, she didn't want anyone to kiss and touch Anna, and she didn't want anyone to see Anna in those revealing clothes but her.


	20. Break Up

The huge bag would undoubtedly break if Elsa wouldn't stop beating it to a pulp anytime soon. It had been a long time since she had gone to the gym, having been too busy with school and, even when she didn't want to admit it, enjoying flirting with Anna.

Elsa knew from the very beginning that their deal was bad news. Whatever made her agree, it was making her miserable now. Stupid curiosity. Stupid love. If only she had the courage and decisiveness to repeatedly tell Anna 'no' when she asked to be pseudo-girlfriends, maybe things wouldn't hurt as much. Watching Anna jumped from one guy to another sucked, but agreeing to be in a fake relationship while knowing that it was impossible for it to be real was a very stupid idea.

Elsa muttered curses under her breath. The anger and jealousy were indescribable. She didn't like the idea of Anna being with someone else anymore. She couldn't take it after experiencing having Anna in her arms.

"Elsa, anything more than that and you'll have to replace the bag," Belle wheezed through heavy pants. Elsa didn't listen. "Are you thinking about Anna?"

"What about it?" Elsa asked, not stopping on her routine.

"You look agitated. Did she reject you?" As those words were spoken, Elsa effectively stopped and looked at the brunette in horror. "Wait... She did?"

"No! I didn't confess!"

"Why not? Judging by the way you've been acting since coming back, it looked like you needed it." Belle shrugged when Elsa glared at her. "No, seriously. What happened? A week ago, you were happy. I thought you were  _finally_  getting somewhere."

"I..." Elsa began, closing her eyes to gather her thoughts. "Anna's ex visited her. They looked comfortable around each other a-and... It's been a long time since I've last seen her act that way."

"Act _what_  way?"

Elsa opened her eyes, looking at the interesting floor. "Comfortable with others," she said. "I... I thought for sure we were getting somewhere. But then, maybe it was only because I've never seen her with anyone else lately. I forgot how comfortable she gets with someone who wasn't me."

When Belle didn't say anything, Elsa touched the punching bag with her trembling hands. Now that she had voiced these things out loud, it made it all the more painful. Memories ever since they started 'dating' flooded her mind, strong enough to flood the gates of her tear ducts too.

"Why won't you confess?"

Elsa blinked. It was an absurd question that was delivered quite gently. She looked at the brunette in horror and was about to tell her off until she saw the stern look on her face. The moment she saw that, chills crawled down her spine. Her mouth shut, and she fixated her gaze for a while, lingering a few more seconds. Despite Elsa's definitely tensed face, Belle didn't look away. She was waiting... for an answer that Elsa knew.

"She's my best friend. We grew up together, and that's..." Elsa sighed and punched the bag again.

Belle's silence tensed Elsa up, and she absolutely refused to look. If she did, Belle would be able to read her like an open book. It was absurd, and she was almost confident that she could hide her feelings well, but there were times when Belle  _could_  outsmart her.

"I'm a little disappointed," Belle uttered. "Okay, you don't want to confess because you're afraid to break what you already have. What are you going to do about it?"

"I... I don't know," Elsa admitted. Belle sighed, and by the sound of it, it couldn't be good. "M-Maybe... try live with it. Try to forget."

"Okay," Belle shrugged and stood up. "Let's go look for a girl who can make you move on from Anna."

"W-What?!"

"What's wrong? You don't want to confess to her, right?" Belle asked quite rhetorically. "The only solution for a broken heart is when someone comes along and tries to mend it, Elsa."

* * *

"Bye!"

Anna waved her hand as Hans walk down the hallway after visiting for another session of drawing. It was the second time he visited because they just had  _that_  many scenes to color. Anna has an eye for detail so she had to correct some stuff in Hans' scenes. On the other hand, he was fast when it comes to base coloring, and she was a total badass when blending colors. It was pretty much balanced.

" _Ugh_." Anna groaned at the mess they had created before proceeding to fix the rough drafts they used to compare that of their final output.

It was lonely, having the apartment all to herself with Elsa nowhere to be found. Elsa had been going to the gym again, not being subtle when carrying her duffel bag and going outside wearing gym clothes.

A part of Anna was relieved because that meant she could avoid Elsa for a few hours a day, but she also felt sick because she knew that Belle was there too. She tried to convince herself that it was for the best. Belle was better than a complete stranger. Belle was smart, pretty, and someone Elsa was comfortable enough to celebrate with.

So why?

Why did it hurt just thinking about it? Was it because someday soon, Elsa would barge inside their apartment and tell her about her undying love for someone else? Was it because she would be demoted to 'best friend' again? That she would no longer be Elsa's 'girlfriend'? That she wouldn't be Elsa's number one?

Sure, that hurts, but if it meant that Elsa would be happy, it should be fine. Elsa had already done a lot for her, and the least she could do was to set her free. Whatever absurdity Hans was talking about, she tried to push it to the back of her mind. Elsa's glare and lack of hospitality to her visitor was something out of protectiveness. That was all there was to it.

Hearing the front door open and shut, Anna did her best to remain composed while fixing the papers around the floor and on the coffee table. A second later and Elsa entered the living room. "Welcome back." Anna smiled, pushing back the earlier thoughts to the deepest recesses of her mind.

"Working on another project?" Elsa took a seat on the sofa.

"Still the same project Hans and I were working on." Anna sat on the ground, her back facing Elsa.

"He came again?"

"Mhm. He bought pizza. It's on the dining table. Something about intruding."

"You get along well," Elsa noted.

"Well, he was my friend even before we started dating." Anna adjusted the papers for equal measure, and then she stood up and settled herself beside Elsa.

"He's not bothering you about... sleeping with him again, right?"

"Nope," Anna assured. "I mean, we're not dating anymore. Plus, he never really forced his way on me. He just asked something ridiculous, and that's it. Right now, he was just being sweet and friendly."

"If he asked you to date again, will you?"

"No," Anna answered instantly, not liking the way this conversation was leading them. Like Elsa didn't care whether or not she dated Hans again. "I mean, okay, he's dreamy and sweet, and he was much better now than he was back then, but I'm not going to date anyone until you find a girl you like, Elsa."

"If I did, will you?" Elsa asked. "Will you give him a chance again? Will you give it a try again?"

"What's with the questions?" Anna laughed nervously.

"Will you?"

Ignoring the fact that she was ignored, Anna locked her eyes with Elsa's. Her mind was searching desperately for something, for anything that could make her read the blonde again. Like the time when she would always notice how Elsa was nervous, unsettled, happy or just plain bored. But she couldn't.

Anna couldn't read Elsa. Not anymore.

"I don't know," Anna answered truthfully, her eyes snapping to the side. "I... know he still has feelings for me, but I don't know. I don't want to hurt him again by going out when I don't really feel anything."

"But you said he's sweet and kind and much better now. Even with that, you won't give him a chance? If he put in the effort? If he proved to you that he was sincere? That he's not just after your... your body? If he's genuinely concerned a—"

"Elsa!" Anna jumped in, cutting Elsa's barrage of reasons. "What's going on? What's with all the questions? Is there something you want to tell me?"

"I..." Elsa began reluctantly. "He's the first guy who... who always seem to get back in your life. The others... they just left, but Hans... he's always there at the most random time."

"He's different from the others," Anna admitted, feeling bitter inside. "He can be blunt, arrogant, rude, and full of himself. That's not really a secret. But he's not pretentious and fake, unlike the other guys who only ever tried to please. He's honest... sometimes for his own good."

An uncomfortable silence surrounded their living room with Anna's mind darting back to the time when she and Hans broke up. How he was so persistent and arrogant and practically made Anna choose between him and Elsa. It wasn't a forceful act, but a simple sentence. A sentence that still haunted her to this day. Up until now, she couldn't believe how Hans wa—

"I think I'm going to try and date Belle."

There was a loud ringing in Anna's ears that she couldn't quite pinpoint, as though it was shielding her from the velvety sound that was Elsa's voice. But the words were already spoken and her ears were a tad bit late to protect her.

Anna wasn't sure how to explain the feelings that rushed through her the moment Elsa's words sunk in. It was something she had never felt before, even to Hans who was the reason for her getting drunk so much she fainted. It wasn't like any cut or bruise she had ever experienced. This one was worse. Much worse.

"D-Do you... like her?" Anna hoped Elsa didn't catch on to her dour mood.

"I do," said Elsa. "You were right. Belle is pretty and she's also kind. Maybe it could work."

Anna folded her hands on top of her lap. This was it. The moment she knew would eventually come. But it didn't stop it from hurting.  _I was still trying to prepare myself for it, but..._  Elsa sure took the most random time to admit it, like how Hans would randomly pop into her life.

"I... I see," Anna managed to say, eyes burning but refusing to give in in front of Elsa, her best friend turned lover turned best friend once more.

The uncomfortable silence became too heavy, the tension in the air almost too palpable. Anna knew she had to say something. She has to cheer and congratulate Elsa, to officially end this fake dating relationship. After all, she made a promise that this would end as soon as Elsa found someone she liked.

Swallowing thickly, Anna stood up, struggling to meet Elsa's gaze with her own. "You're ready?" Anna asked for reassurance, and Elsa nodded. "I see. Then, you better not blow this up."

"I... I know."

Realizing how nervous Elsa was, Anna pushed back her own pain to comfort her. "Elsa, you'll be fine. I'm sure Belle would be happy."  _She better be because she's lucky to have you._  "But if she hurts you, you have to tell me. I don't want you getting hurt."

"She won't." The immediate response was like a stab in the chest, rendering Anna speechless. It hurt to hear Elsa say it as if she was certain Belle wouldn't hurt her.

Suddenly, there was this twisted side of Anna that hoped for that trust to be crushed. That Elsa would one day get hurt because of Belle. She knew it was selfish and almost too evil for someone as sweet as Elsa, but she was jealous. However, she also knew that if she stopped Elsa, it would only crush them both. For the blonde, it would be because she wouldn't be with the girl she liked. For Anna, it would be because she would be the one to see Elsa miserable for not being with Belle. Whichever choice she made, it was bound to hurt either way.

"You really like her," Anna stated as a fact, smiling fondly when Elsa began squirming in her seat. Anna closed her eyes and took a deep breath, preparing herself for what was to come.

Then...

Before her almost nonexistent courage left her, Anna hunched over and locked her lips with Elsa's. It wasn't forceful. It was sweet and soft and caring, giving Elsa the opportunity to push her away if she wanted to. It was probably the best lips Anna had ever kissed, but it was also the most painful.

It hurts because Elsa didn't reciprocate.

Elsa wasn't pushing her away, true, but she wasn't kissing back either. Maybe she was too shocked to move - Anna wouldn't know. But knowing that this would be her first and last kiss with her best friend, she tried to pour all her emotions into it. She wanted to kiss these lips forever if she could, but she can't. She had to let Elsa go.

So she did.

"Breakup kiss," Anna explained with a watery smile, knowing that she has to leave now.

With one last longing look, she took all her art materials and ran to her room. Not wanting to take chances, Anna locked her door because she knew she wouldn't stop anytime soon. She was shaking uncontrollably and both hands covered her mouth to muffle her cries. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks and it was much worse than any kind of break up she had ever been through. The pain she felt then was nothing compared to now, and the worst part was that it wasn't even a real relationship. To hear from Elsa herself that she liked Belle, it was just so... wow.

It hurt, and it hurt a lot.


	21. Fear of Rejection

Arms crossed on top of the table, Elsa pictured, with her eyes closed, the events that happened the day she said something about wanting to try things out with Belle. Specifically, the kiss she shared with Anna.

The thought had Elsa shivering in equal delight and confusion. Her hands tightened as she released an involuntary whimper. She couldn't put her finger on what that kiss meant, but she already missed the contact. It was the first time she felt Anna's lips on hers, and something Anna initiated herself. She was too shocked to reciprocate, but that wasn't what bothered her the most.

Why did Anna kiss her?

Was it alright to hang on to the idea that the little antics and gestures of Anna were being caused by  _her?_  That Anna was affected because of her presence? That, if she ever dared to think, Anna actually felt the same way? Elsa wasn't oblivious; she could notice when something was off, but she didn't want to jump to conclusions. It wasn't her place to assume someone else's feelings, especially when it was too risky to think about.

"Elsa?" Elsa's eyes opened, and then she lifted her head to see Anna dressed up. "Hey! Uhm, I might be out for a long time. Probably won't eat dinner here."

Elsa tried her best to fight the still-growing heat on her face when she realized she was looking at Anna's supple lips. She gulped. Anna was acting normal like the kiss didn't happen. Elsa was close to believing that it was a dream, but Anna had been spending her time outside their apartment ever since then. It couldn't be a coincidence, right?

"Where are you going?" Elsa asked.

"Hans' house." Anna gestured to her bag. "His laptop broke and can't help out if he's here. He's going to use his computer since we need to digitalize our project."

"I'll take you." Elsa stood and before she could take another step, Anna cut her off.

"No need! He's already outside."

"Oh," Elsa breathed. Then, there was a shift in the air. Elsa was having a hard time meeting Anna's turquoises again, and she settled on watching her fingers tap on top of the dining table. "What time are you... going home?"

"I'm not sure," Anna answered. "But he'll drop me off."

"I..." Elsa hesitated. "I'll take you to his car." She pressed her hand firmly on top of the table when Anna tilted her head to the side. "I want to talk to him."

"What for?"

"Just... let me." Elsa walked past a stupefied Anna and picked up her shoes to change to it before facing Anna again. "Come on. It's not nice making someone wait."

"O-Okay."

When Anna stepped forward, there was a splitting second where they just looked at each other. Then, they both averted their gazes somewhere else. Elsa fiddled with the tip of her braids as she discreetly watched Anna wear her doll shoes, knowing full well that the redhead wasn't looking at her. Then, she turned around to unlock the door when she saw Anna done.

"Anna?"

"Hm?"

Elsa curled her fingers inside the pocket of her sweater, trying to draw out some courage. There were many things she wanted to ask but wasn't brave enough to. Maybe hiding her feelings for Anna already became a habit throughout the years. Maybe that was why it was difficult for her to open up or ask something silly.

"About the kiss," Elsa began, eyes settled on the floor. She took a deep breath and looked at her side to see that Anna wasn't walking with her anymore. She turned around and saw the girl now only standing a few steps behind her. "Anna?"

"Yeah, about that!" Anna snapped her fingers, and then she started rubbing the back of her neck. "We never did that even with rule number four! Can't fulfill the deal without it, right? W-Was that a surprise?"

Elsa's lips opened and closed like a fish until she lost her nerves. "It's fine. I was surprised, but it's fine."

"Oh, good." Anna sighed, shoulders slumping. "I was afraid you'd get angry or something. I mean, I became impulsive again and kissed you, and it wasn't even romantic or anything. You would probably prefer to do it with Belle. "

"Well, I..." Elsa cringed inwardly when she tried to imagine kissing the brunette. Sure, the girl was pretty, but they were friends. Then again, Anna was also her friend. "I don't think it's wise to kiss her just like that."

"You really do like her," Anna quipped. "You respect her enough not to kiss her without her consent. Makes me feel like I actually molested you."

"You didn't," Elsa blurted. When Anna tilted her head, Elsa tore her gaze away and looked at the window. "It's not really molestation if... if I liked it," she finished awkwardly, voice getting softer and lowering in volume as it reached the end.

Elsa wasn't sure why she let herself say that, but she didn't have the heart to take it back. That was to say, she was still nervous because she didn't know how Anna would take it, and so she decided to wrap her arms around herself protectively.

"Ah!" Anna shrieked, making Elsa jump. "Shucks! Hans is still waiting downstairs! Come on, Elsa! It's not nice making other people wait!" Anna grabbed the blonde's wrist and dragged her along the hallway until they reached the ground floor.

Elsa frowned. Didn't Anna hear her? Her voice  _was_ falling the moment she admitted those, but really? It took everything she had to say those just to not be heard?

"Hans!" Anna waved and let go of Elsa's wrist. "Sorry! Sorry! We had a little emergency an—"

"Save it." Hans waved a hand. "You two need to take a breather. You're both red and look exhausted," he said, and Elsa's eyes widened a little.

Both girls looked at each other, and, indeed, their faces were flushed, but Elsa was willing to bet that it wasn't because they were tired. She opened her mouth to say something, but she frowned instead when Anna opened Hans' car to place her things inside.

"Elsa said she wanted to talk to you." Anna laughed and closed the back door.

"Oh?" Hans hummed. "What is it?"

The dryness in her throat couldn't get more uncomfortable as she gave Anna a look. Thankfully, Anna caught on to her train of thoughts and settled herself on the passenger seat. Hans watched the odd exchange of looks before facing Elsa completely.

"So...?" Hans trailed off into a question.

Elsa closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths to calm her breathing. When she opened them again, Hans took a step backward, surprised to be on the receiving end of Elsa's glare. "Anna told me you wanted to sleep with her before," Elsa said. "I want to know and hear from you. Was that true?"

"Yeah." Elsa narrowed her eyes pointedly. "When you're in a relationship, Elsa, it's normal to want some sexual contact with your significant other. She was my girlfriend then, but I didn't force myself on her. I loved her, and I didn't want to disrespect her."

"You still do." It was a fact Elsa wasn't willing to dance around in. "Anna trusts you, Hans, even after all that. She was angry, but now, she actually thinks you're a good friend and much better than before. As much as I don't want her to spend time with a guy who tried to get her in bed, I have no other choice."

"Why thank you." Hans bowed exaggeratedly, making Elsa ball her hand into a fist inside her sweater pocket. "But for your peace of mind, I'm not going to touch her. If I'm going to make her mine again, I'll do it fair and square. I'll try to get the approval of her parents and everyone close to her if I have to, and that includes  _you_."

"And if I don't?"

"Then I'd try until I get you to say yes," Hans answered without hesitation. "I won't get anywhere if I let myself get downhearted because of a rejection."

Elsa was speechless as the guy only looking at her with a smile in place. It wasn't mocking, but there was definitely something there. It almost felt the same as the smile Belle shot her when she suggested looking for another girl. It was as if... he could read her.

"What are you implying?" Elsa asked cautiously.

"I'm not implying anything. It's just the truth. You can't get anywhere if you only let your fear of rejection control you."

"Now, hold on." Elsa took her hands out of her pockets and curled them on her sides. "Are you saying you're planning to get her back?"

"What I'm saying is..." Hans started, face turning serious. "Life is too short to live with 'what ifs' or mope around something that's beyond my control. I don't want to keep wondering what could happen, Elsa. If I want something, I'm not going to wait for it. I  _will_ do something to make it happen."

Elsa's grip loosened, replaced by intensive trembling. Words wouldn't slip out of her mouth despite her thoughts running a million miles per second. She was slowly coming to the realization that even though they had met each other before, this was the first time they'd talked one on one.

"Actions," Hans began, snapping Elsa out of her reverie. "They speak louder than words."

"What are you saying?"

"You  _know_ what I mean." Hans reached out to the handle of the door on the driver's seat. "My number is still the same, in case you're curious. Knowing Anna, she forced it on you back when she was still my girlfriend," he chuckled, opening the door and sitting behind the wheel.

Anna's brows furrowed as she looked out the window and asked a silent question. Not wanting to make her feel uneasy, Elsa tried her best to smile despite the uneasiness she felt after hearing Hans' words. Reluctantly, Anna gave an apologetic smile before waving meekly.

As soon as Hans' car went off, Elsa allowed herself to dwell on her own thoughts. She was staring at the corner where his car turned, thoughts repeatedly cycling on their conversation. She wasn't stupid, and she knew that his words were bits of advice delivered quite arrogantly and a little too blunt, but one thing was clear:  _he knows_.

* * *

Anna stuffed her face with chocolate while finalizing the colors of a background, ignoring the scowl on her partner's face. It was the first time she wouldn't say anything and simply started working nonstop. The silence between her and the tall guy was odd, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

"Anna, as much as we're going to get this over with faster with what you're doing, I'm worried you might smudge chocolate on your own Cintiq pen," Hans joked, trying to lift the girl's mood.

It didn't work. Nothing could lift Anna's spirit now when seeing Elsa hurts so much. She wanted to hug Elsa because every time she would feel messed up, the blonde's presence always calmed her down. But now, it was the very reason for her heartbreak. She could only depend on chocolate - and she had been eating tons. So much so that she could almost finish all of Hans' chocolate in his humble apartment.

"You should really tell her," Hans sighed.

"What?"

"You're a mess, Anna. You have to tell Elsa."

"And risk everything?! She made it crystal clear, Hans! She's already dating that girl in the same major and gym! In fact, I'm pretty sure she's there again, getting cozy and clingy with all their sweat a—"

"At least just tell her. You can't exactly move on if you see her every day."

"I know that!"

Anna was already lucky she was able to create a poor excuse for that kiss. Her stupid self just had to move against her will, and she had seriously thought Elsa would've caught up. Maybe she did, but Anna was glad that she didn't push on the topic anymore.

But it was difficult to move on.

Seeing Elsa every day wasn't helping, and even if Elsa wasn't in sight, she was always inside her head. Everywhere she went, it was always screaming about Elsa, Elsa, and Elsa. Anna was going crazier with each passing day. She knew she couldn't avoid Elsa by leaving their apartment all the time. They still live under the same roof. She needed to think of something, anything that could help her move on because moving out of their apartment wasn't an option.

"What on earth did you two talked about anyway?" Anna asked, trying to push her agitation back.

"Nothing you should worry about," Hans said. "Just the usual. How I'm not allowed to force myself on you or anything. Nothing new."

"You didn't say anything stupid, did you?" Anna raised a skeptical brow.

"Depends on what you mean by stupid. I only said that if I'm ever going to make you mine again, I don't need to force you into it because I'll earn my way through. I don't know if she bought it, but that's none of my business."

Anna's jaw dropped at the very casual way he just told her how he was going to earn his way to her heart. It was almost unsettling, but also comforting. She didn't want to use him as a means of getting over Elsa, and she knew that Hans knew that too. They were both aware that he still felt something for her, but no one dared talk or be awkward about it. At this point in time, she was close to believing that his love was demoted to the 'crush' level.

"You, on the other hand, I think I do have a say in this." Hans sat down on the sofa and placed his elbow on his knees. "You did use me before, even if you didn't notice it yourself. How long are you going to keep it all bottled up?"

"As long as it takes." Anna's face filled with determination. "I'm not going to stoop so low anymore. I know what I feel now, and I'm going to deal with it on my own without bothering or hurting someone else."

The two redheads glared at each other, their thoughts not synchronizing. Anna knew what it was that Hans wanted. Maybe he did have the right to feel that way, but she was against the idea. It was true, she felt guilty for everything she did to him and to her previous boyfriends. They were serious about her, but her feelings weren't real for them. But out of all the guys, she felt inclined to Hans more. He was the only one brave enough to get hurt on purpose for her sake.

"Okay, you know what? You're coming with me." Hans grabbed Anna's pen and practically carried her on one shoulder.

"Wait, what?! Hans! Put me down!" Anna struggled and wiggled and swayed and moved like she didn't know how to settle down. "Let me go! Where are you taking me?!"

"To that gym that you love talking about."


	22. From The Distance

An hour after the redheads left, Elsa decided to go to the gym and clear her mind, but to no fruition. Hans' words wouldn't leave her head. Loathe as she was to admit it, he was better than any other guy who was introduced to her by Anna. Up until now, she was curious as to what really broke him and Anna apart. She wasn't convinced that he wanted Anna to avoid her anymore. If that was the only reason, Anna wouldn't keep contact with him.

"Are you okay?" Belle asked when Elsa only stood beside the punching bag.

"No," Elsa admitted, sighing.

The day Belle suggested looking for someone to help her move on, Elsa told her everything. She told her about the fake relationship, why it was difficult, and why she was bothered. Then, somewhere along the line, with Belle simply letting her speak her mind, Elsa decided to call it off. Being stuck in a pseudo-relationship made her feel like she was drowning. If she held on to that illusion, there was no way things would progress between her and Anna, if it would ever.

But she was still indecisive.

When she lied and used Belle's name to force Anna to call the deal off, this wasn't what she expected. A part of her hoped that Anna would complain or at least get jealous. The kiss was almost proof enough that she was, but then, she reasoned out a stupid rule.

Elsa didn't know what to think.

If it was Anna, it was fairly possible that it could have been the only reason. She had always been impulsive and one for jumping at random things. But if she does feel the same, why wasn't she forcing Elsa into it like she normally would? Anna wasn't the type to hold back, and that alone was reason enough for Elsa to doubt her own assumptions.

"Do you want to go ice skating?" Belle suggested.

"Now?" Upon receiving an affirmative, Elsa thought for a second. Anna said that she wouldn't be home for dinner, so it wouldn't be so bad to hang out with other people. "Yeah, okay. Sure."

"Great! Here," Belle offered a bottle of water.

"Sorry," Elsa smiled as she took the bottle from the brunette.

"Elsa, instead of apologizing, I'd rather hear you say thanks. Trust me, it'll feel better," Belle insisted. "Apologizing will only make both of us feel bad. Besides, if there's someone you should apologize to, it's yourself."

"Me?"

"Apologizing for what you willingly did is like stabbing yourself in the back," Belle pointed out while dabbing a finger on her shoulder. "If you're really sorry, do something to prove that you  _are_  instead of just saying it."

"You..." Elsa paused, and then she cleared her throat once. "R-Right."

Meanwhile, Anna was fidgeting like she was inside a freezer on her birthday suit as she stood outside the gym with Hans leaning on his car. Her hands were holding on tightly to the bottle of water she had bought earlier for Elsa. She had no idea what she'd say, but Hans waved her off by saying she should confess.

As if she could do that.

It was already torturing enough standing outside the gym. Anna decided to simply give the damn water bottle to the blonde and bolt away with a lame excuse of passing by. But to do that, she had to go inside. She couldn't do it. She didn't want to see Elsa with Belle, and she didn't want to see Elsa smiling to some other girl with the same smile she had the luxury of soloing before. Maybe even far more charming since... Elsa liked Belle.

"Anna, go!" Hans scowled.

"This is madness, Hans. Let's just go." Anna was about to go to the passenger seat when Hans blocked her way. "Hans! Seriously! Please!" She tried to move on the left, but Hans moved in the same direction.

"No, Anna. You're going in there, and you're going to tell Elsa the truth. Do you have any idea what it feels like to see you mulling over something ridiculous like breaking your friendship if you ever confessed?!" Hans whispered harshly. "Maybe I'm being selfish, but you need your own closure, Anna, and you can't do that by running away."

"I am  _not_  running away! I'm trying to protect our already delicate friendship!" Anna flailed her arms around. "We're not even sure if she's here!"

"You just said that she's probably here being cozy and clingy with whoever that girl is!"

Anna bit her lower lip and ran as fast as she could around Hans' car. Unfortunately, the guy was big; he simply grabbed her like she was nothing. She tried to wiggle her way out of this mess, but Hans held her firmly in his arms.

"Anna?"

Both the redheads' eyes widened as saucers as they looked at each other.  _Shit_. Immediately, they pulled away and looked at Elsa who was now standing outside the front door of the gym... with Belle.

Great. Just when she thought it couldn't hurt more, Anna had to see Elsa with Belle. Not to mention, there was that water bottle on Elsa's hands. What was she going to do with the bottle she just bought now?

"H-Hi!" Anna squeaked, hiding the bottle behind her. An awkward tension settled in the air, and Anna couldn't bring herself to look at Elsa's eyes. There was this tangled knot in her stomach that was making her want to throw up.

"What are you doing here?" Elsa asked.

"I-I... uhm..." Anna swallowed, silently cursing Hans. She wasn't prepared to face Elsa yet. The only thing she could do was to be amazed by her own shoes and continuously fiddle with the bottle she hid behind her.

"Anna, Elsa and I will be going ice skating tonight," Belle informed.

Anna flinched, heart clenching tighter than when she first saw them together. "A-Actually, I-I also c-came to tell E-Elsa t-that I-I'm staying over at Hans' for tonight."

Elsa's world had stopped then. She wanted to leave Anna alone, but she didn't want Anna to stay with Hans or  _anyone_  for the night either. Anything could happen between them, and simply thinking about it made her want to scream.

Elsa gripped on the straps of her duffel bag. "Why?"

"W-We didn't... uhm... w-we need to finish that project we were working on!"

"No," Elsa refused. "Do it in  _our_ apartment."

"O-Our things are in his apartment."

"Pick it up. You're doing it in our place."

Anna's jaw dropped because of seeing Elsa act so stubborn and strict. Back when she had a boyfriend, not once had she ever stayed away for a night. Was this how Elsa would react if she ever tried? It almost looked like she was... jealous.

"Look, Elsa. I told you, his laptop broke and we can't do it somewhere else," Anna explained, desperate to spend the night somewhere else before she started getting ideas.

"No, Anna," Elsa repeated. "It's his laptop that's broken, but you have your own and it's working fine. If you really need to do it together, I can take you to his place again tomorrow, but there's no way you're staying over for the night."

"B-But—"

"I can't let you sleep at a guy's place, especially when you have some kind of history," Elsa pointed out. "Your parents asked me to look after you, Anna, and allowing you to stay at his place will be the exact opposite of that."

"I'm not a kid anymore!" Anna snapped. "I've grown up, Elsa! Stop looking at me as if I'm still the same Anna!" she hissed through gritted teeth and practically slammed the door of Hans' car on their faces.

Anna hated it. She hated how Elsa dragged her parents into the conversation. She hated Elsa's reasons. It was as if she still see Anna as the same kind of little girl she used to be: someone who has poor decision-making skills, someone who continuously needed assistance and protection, and someone who'd always jump in at everything and go wherever life takes her.

_Is that all you see when you look at me, Elsa?_

Anna was lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even notice how Elsa's jaw dropped at her outburst. Much like that kiss, the blonde was too shocked to even say anything. Every fiber of her being was screaming at her to run after Anna. To talk, hug, and kiss her senseless just to prove that she didn't see her as a kid, but her legs were planted firmly on the ground, refusing to take any step.

"Elsa," Hans said, snapping Elsa out of her thoughts. "You know better than anyone that you have to be straight to the point when it comes to her."

* * *

Ice skating was something Elsa loved doing, but she couldn't find the urge to go ahead even when Belle was kind enough to invite her. She didn't have any energy to do anything after having an argument with Anna. She was shocked to hear those words from the redhead. She didn't mean to sound rude, but it looked like Anna took it the wrong way.

"You okay?" Elsa turned in time to see Belle sit beside her. She had been skating nonstop ever since they arrived. "Bothered? Hurt? Anxious?"

"Maybe everything." Elsa laughed breathlessly.

'Empty' would probably be a fitting word to describe how she felt. When was the last time she and Anna had an argument? She couldn't remember. There were times when they'd fight because Anna was being loud and reckless. Sometimes, the redhead would get drunk and Elsa would always scold her for it. They'd fight, but none of those arguments were big enough for Anna to get  _that_ angry.

"Was I wrong?" Elsa asked. "To not allow her."

"Honestly?" The answer made Elsa looked at the brunette who was smiling sympathetically. "You were worried, Elsa. Though I admit, I think I can understand where Anna was coming from."

"You do?"

"Remember, she thinks you're just friends," Belle reminded. "You're both in universities already. She's old enough to take care of herself, and that particular act of protectiveness might have come off as a bit... extreme."

"I'm not even sure how to act around her anymore." Elsa's head lowered, swaying her legs lazily on top of the ice. "I... I'm lost. I don't know what to do."

It no longer mattered who could give her an answer; Elsa was already desperate to know what she could do to bring things back to normal. She was beating herself up for not knowing what to do herself. For a long time, she was able to keep her emotions under control. But now, she couldn't even remember how to do it. She was messed up. Completely.

Like she was treading on unfamiliar territory.

A territory she had skillfully avoided for years, but because of Anna's suggestion of pretending to be lovers, she was forcefully shoved into the battlefield.  _I agreed to it_ , she reminded herself. So, really, it wasn't entirely Anna's fault.

"Just be honest with her, Elsa. She's your best friend," Belle suggested. "Tell her why you don't want her to sleep in that guy's place. That it's not only because you were asked to look after her, but because you're jealous."

"B-But she could get weirded out, Belle! I... I can't lose her! Even if we're just friends... I don't want to lose her."

"Is Anna that kind of girl? Is she the type of girl who'd condemn people who're in love with her? Did she ever turn her back on you when you told her you were gay?"

Belle's words slowly sank into her head, and somewhere deep inside of her, she knew that the girl was right. She simply couldn't bring herself to woman up. Anna once told her that she didn't want to be in a relationship if she was just 'curious' and the other party could be serious. She knew that Anna wouldn't get angry even if she held romantic feelings for her.

She was just afraid that her feelings wouldn't be returned.

* * *

"I should seriously buy a new stock of those." Hans groaned as Anna gobble up the last of his chocolate boxes. "That's a whole month of my pay from the café."

"I'll repay you! Just let me eat these!" Anna huffed, skillfully eating with one hand while holding her Cintiq pen with the other.

Technically, Anna gave a legit excuse. They needed to finish their project because the deadline for their short animation was closing in. The colorization was almost done, and animating them all would fall into Hans' hands. For them, it was a fair deal because she was the one who colored most since she was better at it.

"Why on earth didn't you admit it?"

"Hans, can you please not?! You've seen her with Belle!"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm positive they weren't acting as a couple. In fact, I think it was  _us_ who acted like one."

Anna threw a wrapper at the guy. "No need to rub it in."

"Your fault for letting it happen." Hans lined up the finished scenes on the software, deciding to keep his hands busy and try to finish early so that Anna wouldn't need to stay over.

Hans was a good friend. Selfish at times, but he could be quite selfless too. That was why Anna knew that this thing with Elsa was unsettling for him. Not only because there could still be lingering feelings for him, but because this wasn't the Anna that he knew. She was moping, and he wasn't used to that.

"Hey, red," Hans called after a moment of silence.

"You're a redhead too."

"Why exactly are you afraid to tell Elsa everything?" Hans asked, ignoring her statement.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because she's my best friend and she'll go weird on me if I ever confessed to her or something."

"Weird?"

"Elsa's paranoid. Knowing her, she'll deny my feelings and say that I'm just confused." Anna took another bite of some chocolate. "She'll keep on saying it's wrong or weird because we grew up together."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because she told me herself," Anna admitted bitterly before munching on her snacks again. "When I suggested helping her out when it comes to flirting, she went hysterical and told me it was weird. That flirting with me and pretending to be a couple is beyond ridiculous."

Hans hummed while his hands do the work. "Anna, let me just give a friendly advice."

"It's not about confessing again, is it?"

"Depends on how you take it." Hans leaned back in his chair, waiting for Anna to give him the go signal. She grunted. "Well, it's just from an outsider's point of view. I really think you're just hanging up on the idea that you know each other well."

"We grew up together, Hans. We know each other well," Anna deadpanned. Hans groaned and rubbed his face with a hand. "What? I know that she's really protective, sweet, kind and caring, which can sort of explain why she doesn't want me to stay over."

"What I'm trying to say is that Elsa's not the only one who should try to look at you. You should know that the Elsa  _now_ is different from the Elsa from your childhood days too." When Anna only stared, he sighed. "Try to look at things from a distance, Anna. You'd be surprised," he said with a lopsided smile, but Anna could only raise an eyebrow.


	23. Three Days

"You're back."

"Obviously."

"That's it? 'Obviously'?"

"Is there something else?"

"Anna, you were gone for  _three_ days," Elsa pointed out, hissing. "You said it was only for one night! Why were you gone for three days?!"

"I told you we were doing some project!" Anna explained, her voice steadily rising to match Elsa's irritated tone. "We were way behind schedule, okay? I told you where I was! Why are you angry?!"

Anna knew that staying away for three days might have been extreme. Hans tried to convince her to go home, but she couldn't find the courage to. The conversation with the guy only managed to make her reluctant to go.

"You were with a guy, Anna, and you didn't even tell me where he lives! Every time I messaged you, it's always 'Hans'! How on earth do you expect me to calm down?!"

"So what?! I've been with guys a lot of times before! You didn't even get ballistic over them! What makes Hans any different?!"

"You spent three days with a guy who wanted to take you to bed, Anna!  _That's_ the difference!"

"We didn't do anything, okay?!" Anna rubbed her temples. "You know what, I'm tired. I need to rest."

"Anna, le—"

"I'm  _tired_." Anna walked past the blonde to go to her room, desperate to get some time alone and away from Elsa.

As soon as she reached her room, Anna jumped on her bed and yelled, her screams muffled by her pillows. She thought she was already prepared to see Elsa again, but perhaps three days wouldn't be enough for that. The only reason why she forced herself to go home was that she already felt bad for using Hans' bed while he slept in his living room.

After a few minutes, the shock and adrenaline of what happened deflated. The conversation, the first meeting after three days... It all replayed inside her head. Anna groaned, realizing how rude she had been. Clearly, there was no need to get angry. She really needed to get herself together before she destroyed this remaining friendship with Elsa.

* * *

With her face flushed, throat dry, hands trembling, and heart pounding, Elsa gulped down the water on the pitcher.

 _That could have gone better_ , she thought grimly.

Of all the times to snap, it had to be when Anna came back. Could she be blamed, though? Elsa had seriously thought of having a search and rescue party. Except, Anna wasn't missing. Elsa knew she was with Hans because whenever she would text, Anna would reply with one word. It was 'Hans'. If Elsa would ask where she was, it was 'Hans'. If she'd ask who she's with, it was 'Hans'.

It was frustrating because Elsa has no idea where Hans lived!

What were they doing? Why wasn't Anna coming home? Those were the thoughts that haunted Elsa for three days. She couldn't take that Anna was alone with Hans. Seeing them together was too much to bear, but knowing that they were together and not knowing what they were doing was just pure torture.

Anna had never stayed away from their apartment for far too long. Even when she was in her previous relationships, Anna  _always_  came home. But now she had stayed away for days... because of Hans. Elsa couldn't believe that they were only doing a project. Anna was passionate about drawing and never crammed when it came to art. So why?

"This won't work," Elsa mumbled lightly, rubbing the side of her head.

This distance between her and Anna had been growing bigger by the second. Maybe it was her. She couldn't go back to being friends after experiencing being Anna's girlfriend, pretend or not. She wanted something real. Was she selfish? Was she asking for too much?

"What won't work?"

Elsa's whipped around to see Anna wearing house clothes, but she was out of her usual camisole. The sight confused Elsa again, like how she had been the last few weeks. "W-What?"

"You said something about something not working." Anna's eyes landed on the pitcher of water that Elsa was drinking from just a few minutes ago. "Were you just drinking on that?"

Elsa blushed. It wasn't always that she would do something with a lack of decency. She had always scolded Anna whenever she would try, and yet there she was doing the same thing. "I-I was about to wash it."

Anna bit on the inside of her lower lip before shrugging and walking into the kitchen, taking a glass with her. She was confused as to why Elsa drank from the pitcher regardless of the fact that she was going to wash it but decided not to ask. She was much too busy planning a speech because she knew she had to apologize. Her actions when she arrived... They weren't very nice.

Summoning her courage, Anna stood across Elsa, the kitchen island separating them. There was a subtle blush on her cheeks, but there was also determination on her face. Elsa knew from that look alone that Anna was ready to talk.

"Okay," Anna began, huffing out a breath as though it would release the tension in her body. "I get it. I was rude and childish. I'm sorry I yelled at you like that. You were just worried and yet, I..."

But even when she couldn't complete the sentence, Elsa still melted.  _I can't go back from this_ , she admitted inwardly. The way Anna was standing in front of her, obviously nervous but not running away, she felt so small. If only she had at least half of Anna's courage, maybe it would've been easier. She couldn't understand if she was glad for the island separating them or not.

"J-Just..." Elsa was surprised that her voice squeaked. She silently cleared her throat and tried her best not to avoid looking at Anna. "Were you... seriously doing a project?"

"Yes," Anna gently answered. "Coloring the scenes could take time. I... I had to push him into it because I want to go home early for Olaf's birthday."

"Why did you have to do it there? I know you said his laptop broke, but you have your own and... you can always do it here."

There it was. The question Anna knew would eventually come. She had prepared answers beforehand, but now that Elsa asked them, all preparations became useless. She couldn't remember the excuses she came up with. She knew she had to give an answer and fast.

"I don't know," Anna answered in half-truth. "At first it was only supposed to be that day, but then I yelled at you and I w-was angry and suddenly, it just felt awkward to come back."

This time, Elsa couldn't take it. At a speed that shocked both of them, she ran to Anna and hugged her impossibly tight and gentle at the same time. It sent their hearts beating wildly; both oblivious to their effects on each other. For a brief moment, Elsa wondered if this was too much for a friend to do. The thought was quickly pushed down because, admittedly, she didn't care anymore.

She just wanted Anna.

"You," Elsa choked. "If you were stressed or sad or just thinking about something, you could've told me. I don't want this awkwardness between us, Anna. Please... if we have a problem, let's talk about it."

 _We can't_ , Anna inwardly replied. She couldn't tell Elsa what the real problem was when Elsa finally found someone she was interested in. For the first time in forever, Elsa found someone she liked and Anna couldn't spoil it for her. She didn't want to add unnecessary drama to her best friend's life. She had to be the friend she had always been.

"We don't have a problem, Elsa." Anna wrapped her arms around the blonde, rubbing soothing circles with her hand. "I'm just really tired. I'm sorry for staying away. You know how I get when I'm stressed." She accompanied her statement with a snort to prove that there really wasn't anything to be worried about.

Elsa squeezed Anna lightly, not trusting her own voice. The stress from being worried for the last three days was dawning on her. She badly missed Anna, she could cry.  _Just tell her_ , she tried to convince herself,  _she won't hate you_.

"Elsa?" Anna cooed. "I'm serious, you know? We're okay!"

"Are we?" Elsa asked softly that if it wasn't for their proximity, Anna would've missed it. Elsa pulled back to meet turquoises with her own icy blues. "Are we really okay?"

Elsa didn't want to run away anymore. There was a part of her that was dying to tell Anna everything, but there was still a coward part of her somewhere. Anna, on the other hand, was starting to feel uneasy. The way Elsa looked at her, it was almost as if Elsa was trying to read her.

"Of course!" Anna said with the fakest giant toothy grin she could ever muster. "Actually, why don't we go out some time? We haven't done that in while! I think I want to go on a double date with you."

"Wha...? Double date?"

"Ahuh." Anna nodded, and then she pointed at herself. "Me and Hans... with you and Belle."

* * *

"You're kidding, right?"

Anna cringed upon hearing the disbelieving tone of Hans' voice. His eyes were as wide as saucers, threatening to pop, and she couldn't exactly blame him. She had told him about the double date she had asked of Elsa and was hoping he could understand. Unfortunately, he didn't.

"You stayed over for three days, and now you want to go on a date with me? A double date with Elsa and her date?" Hans asked, irritated. "You want me to keep watching you hurting yourself while seeing them together? I didn't peg you for a masochist!"

"I'm not a masochist, okay?! I just want to make sure that Belle was as good as Elsa made her out to be!"

"That's not the point! What the hell were you thinking?! Weren't you jealous of seeing them together?! Why did you ask for a double date?!"

As if her mood wasn't bad enough, Hans had to make it worse. In truth, Anna wasn't certain as to why she did it herself. Was she really a masochist? She knew that it would be painful to see Elsa with someone else. Did she have to go and ask that of her?

"I don't know," Anna groaned. "I guess I just... I just thought that m-maybe... maybe if I get to see that they're really happy, that Belle likes Elsa genuinely, maybe I can force myself to let go. I mean it's the first time Elsa considered being in a relationship. I just don't want her to end up with someone who wasn't serious."

"Are you an idiot or what?"

"Hey!"

"You don't want to let her go, Anna. You want her to be happy, but you don't want her to be happy with someone else. You want to  _be_  the cause of it."

Anna groaned and slammed her head on the table. "Are you trying to be a love guru now?"

"Learned from the most stubborn and oblivious redheaded girl on earth." Anna had the decency to get embarrassed. "Besides, I'm a total outsider. Hearing these things from you and seeing things from my perspective, to be honest, I'm really impressed."

"With what?" Anna tilted her head upwards to look at the guy.

"That you actually think Elsa could hate you," Hans pointed out, sighing when Anna merely frowned. "Lots of best friends are afraid when they fall for each other, Anna. No one wants to confess because the other might not reciprocate."

"Your point being?"

"Are you just going to be another one of those people? Keep it all inside because you don't want things to change for the worst? What if it changes for the better? What if Elsa feels the same way and you're both just too scared to make a move?"

Anna hoisted herself up and narrowed her eyes. "Are we talking about this again?"

Anna knew where this conversation would lead them. Hans was trying to convince her to get it over with, but she had already set her mind. She laid down everything on this double date. There were two possible outcomes from it. One, Elsa would turn out to be really happy with Belle. Anna would get hurt, but she would still give her support and be the best friend that Elsa deserved. Two, Belle would turn out to be bogus and Anna would save Elsa from the heartache, jumping in and... comfort her.

Shit.

Comforting Elsa while she was crying because of another girl? Could she do that? Suddenly, Anna wasn't sure what was more painful: seeing Elsa happy because of someone else, or seeing her cry because of someone else. Whatever the choice, both sounded incredibly agonizing.

"Come on, Anna. Don't you want to hear Elsa's answers from her? If she doesn't like you that way, at least you had closure. If she does, well... good thing you tried, right? Whereas if you just mope around, trying to be heroic by hurting yourself and covering it with sugarcoated words like you just want her to be happy, then  _you_ won't be happy."

"Look. I get it, okay? But it's not easy."

"I never said it was," Hans promised. "Loving someone is never easy, but if the person is worth it, it's worth it."

His words had Anna's resolve melting. Realizing herself how she couldn't bear to see Elsa with anyone, she was starting to consider his suggestion. It was scary because she didn't want Elsa to treat her differently. Of course, if Elsa could love her the same way she does, she wouldn't mind the change. But this was Elsa. She had always been sensible and would explain things logically. If Elsa would start getting weird around her, she didn't know how she'd feel then.

"You're still not out of the date."

"Damn. I almost got it," Hans mumbled petulantly. It was a funny sight, but Anna couldn't bring herself to laugh. She was thinking about his advice, and she knew that he was right. She needed closure.

* * *

"A double date?"

"Yeah."

Elsa and Belle were doing sit up passes suggested by their coach, and they were doing it effortlessly since they were already used to sit-ups. Passing a ball while doing it only made it more interesting. The silence between them drove Elsa to share the news with the brunette. At first, she felt guilty because if she was ever troubled, it was always Anna who would know about it first. But then, she realized she couldn't go to Anna for help about this.

"And you agreed?" Belle wondered.

"I didn't want to. It was just a spur of the moment kind of thing. She caught me off guard," Elsa admitted, feeling lame for letting Anna drag her into another one of her random plans.

"So why didn't you take it back?"

"I don't know. I-I was about to tell her everything when she said something like that out of the blue. I thou—"

"Whoa, whoa, wait!" Belle grabbed the ball and sat up, prodding Elsa to do the same. "You were about to tell her everything?"

Elsa felt her cheeks flare up, hands taking an interest in each other. "I was  _trying_ to. But then, she asked for a double date, and I just..." she trailed off with a sigh.

For a moment, Belle froze up, her eyes staring innocently at Elsa. The blonde was only feeling awkward by the second, and then the blush she had darkened at an impossible shade when the brunette started laughing. It didn't sound like a mocking laugh, but one made because of being highly amused.

"E-Elsa, you're so adorable!" Belle managed to say after getting herself together. "Okay, sorry for laughing, but that was just so cute!" Elsa simply groaned and pinch the bridge of her nose. "But seriously, what changed? Why the sudden urge to tell her? Not that I'm complaining. Just curious."

"T-That's," Elsa began. "I can't go back to being friends, Belle. I can't. I... I don't want to lose her to someone else again. We live under the same roof, but there's already a tension between us that won't go away all because I... I don't want to see her with Hans."

"I see." Belle smiled, convinced. "So what are we going to do? Do you want to cancel that double date or...?"

Elsa pursed her lips tight and tried to think it through. Why had Anna decided to call for a double date? What was she thinking? Elsa was sure she didn't say anything about officially going out with Belle, so why a date? And with Hans even! Was Anna giving him another chance? What happened to that talk about only seeing him as a friend? In a span of three days, was Hans able to convince her to go out with him again?

Face dropping, Elsa asked. "What am I going to do?"

"It's your choice, Elsa," Belle answered. "Whether or not you plan to go through with it, I'll support you. I can go with you just for show, and maybe stop you from beating somebody up," she giggled, but Elsa was already lost in her own pessimistic world again.

"B-But why is she suddenly asking for a date? With Hans?" Elsa bit her fingernails. "Are they going out again?"

"Uh... You do know that if  _you_ don't have an answer to that, there's no way I do, right?" Belle raised an eyebrow, and then her face softened when she saw the genuine panic on Elsa's face. "Elsa, relax. Just because he's her date doesn't mean they're going out. It could only be a friendly date."

"Is it?"

"How can someone so decisive just a few minutes ago become this unsure now?" Belle huffed before placing her hands on the floor, leaning all her weight on them. "Are you going to let this stop you? What happened to not wanting to lose her to someone again?"

"I..."

"Keep this up and  _I'll_ be the one telling Anna the truth," Belle threatened. "I'll tell her that you love her so much you'd run around outside, asking random people if they'd seen her when she didn't come home for days. I'll tell her you fainted once because you were stupid enough to go to the gym and exercise when you haven't even been eating regularly since she left. I have a picture of everyone panicking over your unconscious body to prove it, Elsa."

Dread filled Elsa's stomach at the very memory of that incident. If Anna found out about it, she would seriously get angry. "Wha... WHAT?! Why did you take a picture of that?!"

"Because I know I can use it at times like these," Belle admitted without a second thought.

Elsa's jaw dropped. Was she just blackmailed? Maybe, but she also knew better. Blackmail or not, she closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths to calm down and clear her thoughts.  _I can't lose her again_ , she mused,  _not without doing anything_.

"Please don't, Belle," Elsa pleaded as she opened her eyes. "If she's going to know, I want her to hear it from me," she said with a subtle smile, and then she sighed when the brunette rolled her eyes and muttered a silent 'finally'.


	24. Double Date Part 1: Courage

"You're not going to pick her up?" Anna asked while tying her hair in twin braids, looking for her phone in the living room, wanting to organize her things before leaving for the day.

"We decided to meet there," Elsa admitted, letting herself stare. The attention made Anna blush and look away, awkwardly roaming around to look for her phone.

"I see," Anna hummed, trying to seem nonchalant while equally glad and baffled upon hearing Elsa's information. Was that how it worked for the same-sex relationships? They'd just meet up at the rendezvous point? She almost regretted telling Hans to pick her up lest Elsa would offer her a ride.

"Hans will pick you up?"

"Yup." Anna beamed when she saw her phone on top of the TV stand. "He's probably close."

Elsa didn't say anything, hands clutching her knees. She wanted to tell Anna to meet with Hans in the meeting place. She wanted to be the one to take her there. She wanted to spend some more time together before she experienced a whole day of jealousy. It was Belle's idea to meet up in the theme park, giving Elsa more time to spend with Anna alone. She  _has_  to make the most of it.

"W-Why is he picking you up?" Elsa asked, mentally cursing herself for stuttering.

Anna blinked. "Because he's my date?" The answer came out as a question, unsure why it had to be explained.

"Yes, but... we're living in the same apartment. We could've gone together and... meet them there."

 _Yeah, shouldn't have asked Hans_ , Anna mentally groaned. Her eyes lingered on Elsa's fingers, wondering why she was fiddling with them. Deciding not to ask, Anna swallowed the lump in her throat and sat beside Elsa with the most grace she was ever capable of doing.

"You didn't tell me you wanted to go together." Anna made sure not to sound accusing or regretful. There they were again, sitting on the very same sofa where she called their deal off. "I thought you were going with Belle."

"He's..." Elsa balled her hands into a fist. "He's not here yet. M-Maybe you can tell him to meet us there."

Elsa inwardly cringed after hearing her own words. Was that too desperate? She didn't want to sound too clingy, but at the same time, she wanted Anna to take a hint. Only, Anna was never good at puzzles. She didn't know what to think or what to feel for that matter. Elsa's suggestion did seem reasonable because they lived under the same roof, but they were going on a double date... and they weren't each other's date.

"I can't. It would be rude to change plans at the last minute. Besides, Belle is probably waiting for you there. Shouldn't you go?"

The rejection was a blow to Elsa's little pride. Was Anna really giving Hans another chance? The thought alone made her want to run away. It was hard to forget about those three days that Anna didn't go home. Even when Anna assured her they only did a project, they were still alone.  _I'm so pathetic_ , Elsa thought.

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right." Elsa let out a breathy shaky laugh. "Okay, just... b-be careful."

"Elsa?" Anna's voice shook with uncertainty when she noticed the shift in Elsa's mood. Elsa stood up and balled her hands into fists, giving Anna a small amount of time to see if they were trembling or not.

"I'll see you later."

"O-Okay."

Elsa grabbed her keys and ran to the front door, struggling to breathe and desperate to reach the solitude of her car before breaking down.  _Cry because you're a coward_ , she reminded herself. She almost laughed at her own foolishness. If only she could laugh outside too.

"H-Hey."

Elsa's world practically crushed. The moment she opened the front door, a redheaded man stood outside. The man she had engraved in her memory, the man she was madly jealous of for being able to call Anna his, and the man who spent three whole days with Anna. Elsa felt terrible for more than just one reason, but only one reason stood out.

Her tears were streaming down her cheeks... in front of Hans.

"W-Why are yo- HEY!" Elsa ignored the way Hans called for her attention and ran away. As if she wasn't anxious enough as it is, he just had to see her cry. Of all people, it was Hans who had to see her cry!

* * *

It was hard to reign herself in as she watched Elsa and Belle share a huge cup of snow cones. Anna was jealous. It used to be her sharing those little things with Elsa, but now, Elsa was sharing that moment with someone else.

"Did you have a fight?" Hans asked.

"Huh?" Anna looked at the big guy who was taking a sip of some fruit shake that was a pale shade of orange. She couldn't understand why they were all drinking something cold when it wasn't even that hot.

"You and Elsa. Did you have a fight?"

"No. Why?"

"She was crying earlier when I came to pick you up."

Anna blinked. Elsa was crying? Why was Elsa crying? They were just having a normal conversation before leaving. If anything, they were starting to mend their awkwardness around each other. Then again, Elsa's mood dampened noticeably when she rejected her offer. Elsa cried because of that?

"Are you serious?" Anna asked, suspicious.

"Do you think I'd lie about something like that?"

"Why was she...?" Anna trailed off and looked at Elsa and Belle.

The first thing Anna noticed was that it was off. Everything about Elsa felt off. Her smile, her laugh, her posture. It wasn't a good kind of off. Almost as if... Elsa wasn't being herself. Or was that how Elsa was when with the girl she liked?

"Do they look happy?" Anna wondered.

"The truth?" Hans narrowed his eyes, observing the girls. "They look comfortable, at least. As for ha- Hey!" He scowled when Anna grabbed his drink.

"Shush!" Anna hushed and took big sips from his straw. Hans watched in horror as the shake gradually disappeared from his cup. "Ugh. How can you drink this?!"

"Says the one who drank it all."

"I need your help!" Anna blurted, ignoring his irritation.

Hans merely frowned, and then his eyes widened when Anna pointed to an ominous stall.

"FUWUAAAH!" Anna shivered and held the side of her head with one hand.

"Damn it! Did you seriously have to get the biggest bowl?!" Hans tried while holding the side of his head with both hands.

Maybe Anna's genius idea wasn't so genius after all. It certainly wasn't romantic either. She wanted to beat the way Belle and Elsa were acting happy and eating a cup of snow cones that she ended up ordering the biggest size. At first, it looked nice and appetizing. Now that they were around half of the bowl, she and Hans were close to giving up.

"Are you okay?" Belle asked from the bench next to theirs.

"Yeah, yeah! We're good! This is nothing!" Anna dismissed the worry and took another bite of the ice. "MPHHHMMMM!"

"I'm not!" Hans bitterly took another bite himself. "Mrmph?! Really, Anna?! Pickles?!" He covered his mouth and narrowed his eyes, obviously wanting to glare but couldn't because of the brain freeze.

"You were the one who told me to choose!" Anna stuck out her tongue which was starting to turn really red because of the flavor on her side of the bowl. Thankfully, it was fruit flavored. Somehow, Hans ended up with the side where she pointed randomly to the bottles of syrup.

"Remind me again why I let you talk me into this?" Hans frowned.

"I didn't. You just came along," Anna snorted and took a bite again, closing her eyes hard at the mixture of the cold and sweet taste of strawberry in her mouth.

"I dare you to eat this!" Hans gestured to the pickle flavored ice, effectively making Anna cringe. He raised a brow as the female redhead darted her eyes among the green looking ice and her prince charming of a friend. "Well?! Come on!" He took a great amount of the ice with his spoon and offered it to her.

"Hans! That's too mu- MRPH?!"

Both of Anna's hands immediately reached out to the sides of her head. Her eyes closed and lips pursed tight, praying and hoping for the damn ice to melt fast inside her mouth. Thank god she wasn't against pickles, unlike Hans who felt strongly about them. It made this thing manageable... a little.

"That was rude!" Anna scowled once she finally calmed down.

"Now you know," Hans huffed and took another bite of the pickle flavored ice which was mercifully almost finished. Anna felt the side of her lips twitched, inwardly admitting she went too far for ordering something of this size.

Resigning herself to the idea that she probably wouldn't be able to ride the roller coaster later, she lifted her spoon and decided to finish the damn bowl.  _I should've ridden it before eating_ , she sighed inwardly. Her thoughts were cut off the moment someone stole her spoon from her, only to land on a familiar pair of lips.

"Wha—?! E-Elsa, what are you doing?!" Anna stood up and stared wide-eyed at the blonde who was frowning from the mere taste of pickle flavored crushed ice.

"You shouldn't have ordered this size. It's melting." Elsa gestured to the bowl.

 _You were the one who shared with Belle first_ , Anna shot back inside her head. She knew it was only her jealousy talking, but whatever. She hated how Elsa would share a cup of snow cones with Belle when she used to only share it with her.

"That's enough." Elsa held firm. It was already one thing that Hans fed Anna with his fork, but to see her cheeks drained of all colors? Anna was never one for the cold, and Elsa was afraid she was pushing herself to her limits.

"But there's still like half of it!" Anna reasoned.

"I said, enough," Elsa repeated.

The silence that surrounded them felt like an eternity for the two. They couldn't hear or see anything else but each other. For Elsa, she was trying to show hints of her jealousy, but she was mainly just concerned for the girl's wellbeing. For Anna, it was because her heart was beating rapidly inside her chest. Much like the time outside the gym, there was something about Elsa's expression that made her feel... unsure.

"Why don't we just ride the rollercoaster?" Elsa suggested out of the blue.

The offer made Anna snap out of her worries. She had made Elsa ride roller coasters before but not in this theme park. It was the same theme park where Elsa suggested riding the carousel. If memory served her right, she didn't force Elsa to ride the roller coaster because she didn't want the blonde to feel uncomfortable. And yet, the same girl was now suggesting that very same ride.

"What?" Anna dumbly asked.

The frown on Elsa's face softened into a smile. "Rollercoaster. Do you want to?"

"But, you- Elsa, you're scared of rollercoasters! You said you don't want to give that—" Anna pointed to the roller coaster. "—a try because it looks crazier than the others!"

"Well," Elsa stopped, inwardly agreeing with Anna on that. "W-We never did ride it the last time we went here, a-and..." she trailed off, looking to Belle for some help.

Anna followed her gaze to see Belle darting her eyes between Elsa and her. If she only knew Belle like Elsa did, she would notice how much the girl was trying to fight the urge to face-palm at that moment. As it was, she didn't notice her tensed face and unfortunately came up with the wrong idea.

"I think I'll pass." Anna forced a smile. "I still need to get over the ice. I'm not sure if riding a rollercoaster now will be a good idea. Oh, but you can go together if you want!"

"Oh." Elsa looked at Anna again, surprised by the rejection of her favorite ride. "No, uhm... It's okay. I think I can only do it if we're all together."

"Oh," Anna said in a similar way Elsa did. "That's..."

"Let's ride it, then!" Hans stood abruptly, making the two girls jump. "Come on! If we're gonna get in, we need to go now. The line's really long."

"It's fine," Elsa assured when she noticed Anna hesitating. "If... Anna doesn't want to, it's fine. Why don't we... Where do you want to go?" she instead asked, looking at the female redhead again.

Everyone's attention landed on Anna who was suddenly feeling nauseous. This was the first time Elsa suggested the rollercoaster on her own, but the idea that it only happened when Belle was with them overwhelmed her. Then again, rejecting the offer for a rollercoaster will surely look suspicious coming from her.  _Come on, Anna! Elsa needs your support here! She'll get a hint if you keep this up_ , she mentally berated herself.

"Well, I..." Anna awkwardly scanned the area with her eyes. "W-We can go after I buy some chocolates!" she squeaked, and then she dragged Hans towards the familiar chocolate shop, leaving Belle shaking her head in disapproval of Elsa's tongue-tied and unclear invitation.

* * *

Anna glared at the truffles on display, no matter how appetizing they looked like. She wasn't in the mood, and an Anna who wasn't in the mood for chocolates only meant she felt absolutely crushed. To see Elsa trying to face her fears because Belle was there, she didn't like it. She didn't like how Elsa suggested something like that and looked at Belle as if she was her reason for suggesting it.

"The chocolate will melt, Anna."

"Let it."

"Okay, why don't we stop wasting our time having some serious staring contest with chocolates without a price?" Hans picked up a piece of chocolate and ate it. "You know, just go out there, ride that thing, and see if you can get her to spend more time with you?"

"I'm here to see if Belle can be trusted, okay?"

"Whatever you say, red."

"Look, I didn't reject her offer, did I? I only need to... get myself together." Anna sighed, picking up a chocolate. "She suggested something she wasn't used to all because Belle's here."

"Just because she suggested it doesn't mean she's doing it for that girl," Hans pointed out. "I don't know what the hell happened, but she did say something about you not being able to ride it the last time you were here."

A sudden throb in her chest made Anna stop for a second. His words rang in her ears, followed by Elsa's.  _She did say something like that_ , she thought. But what did it mean, exactly? Elsa trailed off while looking at Belle like that. It was almost as if there was... longing in there somewhere.

"Love troubles?"

Anna's head snapped to the door which opened behind the counter, seeing a blonde girl carrying two trays of assorted chocolates came from inside. Despite her fondness for chocolates, Anna's attention was set on the blonde.  _No way_ , she thought.

"AHHHH!" Anna yelled.

"Wha- Whoa, whoa!" The girl wiggled and swayed skillfully to balance the trays on both hands. "Oh wow! Don't scare me like that! That could've gone on my pay!" She sighed in relief and placed the trays in front of Anna and Hans.

"Y-You!" Anna stuttered.

"Hmm?" The girl blinked and looked at Anna. "Wait. Oh! It's the confused girl!"

"Conf- Please don't tell me you made that my nickname." Anna's brows furrowed in disgust.

"Not really. First time I said that." The girl snorted while lining up the chocolates. "But, wow, I can't believe we got to see each other again. Small world, huh?"

"Why are you here? You weren't here before!" Anna said harsher than intended.

"I only started this job a few days ago," the girl answered before leaning on the counter. "Wait, is it only you? That girl with you back in the bar isn't around?"

"What?"

"It looked like she wanted to kill me alive."

"Who's this?" Hans jumped in, eyeing the girl curiously.

"Rapunzel, but you can call me Zel," the girl said with a huge toothy grin. "Your friend and I might've started off on the wrong foot."

"What makes you think we're just friends?" Hans asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Because I heard your argument from behind the door? You're not exactly subtle," Rapunzel answered, making Hans snort. "Anyway, you don't have to answer my question. I was just curious. Never really had anyone glare at me so much until that night. Pretty memorable."

"Glare?" Hans asked, looking at Anna.

"Well, I..." Anna began awkwardly. "She's the girl I... met in a gay bar once."

Hans ended up grinning from ear to ear, and Anna felt her cheeks heat up because she had mentioned this woman to him before. No matter how much she tried and twisted the facts, this woman was still the reason why she couldn't deny her own feelings for Elsa.

"Right. Aaaanyway." Rapunzel giggled and took one flyer from the back desk. "Since you're here inside the shop, might as well give you one of these."

Anna took the paper from the blonde's dainty hand and eyed the designs with hearts and fluid letters. To her, it was slightly unpleasant to look at. It was cluttered with too much information for a flyer, but it could also pass as decent. It was fine, but it wasn't perfect. She decided to stop criticizing and just read what it was for.

"Promo for couples?"

Meanwhile, Elsa couldn't put her finger on it. Looking at the woman behind the counter from outside of the store, a sick feeling settled inside her stomach. She was pretty much done while thinking of riding the rollercoaster, but for some strange reason, the feeling had only gotten worse because the woman looked vaguely familiar.

"I'm pretty sure that snow cone jealousy attempt worked." Belle was cupping her chin while thinking deeply. "But you had to go and get tongue-tied at the last minute. Why did you try to take the invitation back?"

"Because she rejected?" Elsa said, though it sounded more like a question.

"Elsa, I know she's your weakness, but you have to be forceful sometimes." Belle wagged a finger in the air. "Well, there's no use crying over spilled milk. At least, in the end, she agreed to ride it. All we have to do is wait until she's done buying chocolates."

"Oh god." Elsa breathed, swallowing the lump in the back her throat. "She really did say that, didn't she? B-But I can't ride that thing!"

"Then why did you suggested it?!" Belle whisper-shouted, and then she rubbed her temples. "Okay, wait. This might actually work. Maybe if you're scared enough, you can just shout your feelings up there and get this over with." Belle laughed when the color drained from Elsa's cheeks. "You said that the guy knows about your feelings, right? Maybe he'll agree with setting you two up on one seat."

"I don't think that's going to happen. He still likes her," Elsa said, eyes looking back at the shop. "And he's her date. There's no way she'll sit with me."

"Not if I can help it," Belle smirked. "Now, why don't we get inside and keep them company? You know, before you run off to somewhere."

"I won't! I'm... I'm trying, okay?"

"Well, stop trying and just do it," Belle demanded before dragging a tensed Elsa inside the shop.

The moment they entered, three pairs of eyes landed on them. Looking at the woman behind the counter from up close, Elsa's blood boiled. The momentary jitters because of the inevitable ride were replaced with an ugly feeling of anger and jealousy. It didn't help either that they were together in one place: Anna, Hans, and the girl who almost kissed Anna.

"Wel–COME?!" The girl squeaked. "F-Feel free to look around! We also have free samples for you to try if you ever feel confused on what to buy or just want some free sweets!"

Narrowing her eyes, Elsa took pleasure in the squirming girl across the counter. Why was this same woman inside the chocolate shop?  _She wasn't here when we came before_ , she mused. Anna, on the other hand, noticed Elsa's reaction and winced inwardly. She knew that Elsa had a good memory. She was sure she'd remember Rapunzel.

"A-Anyway, what is this for?" Anna looked at the girl again.

"R-Right!" Rapunzel cleared her throat before breaking out into a huge toothy grin. "It's almost the anniversary of the theme park, and we're having some promo. For us, it's that. As long as you can prove that you're a couple, we can carve out your names or couple name and give them to you at a discounted price!"

"And... how exactly do we  _prove_  it?" Hans dared, making Anna raise an eyebrow.

"I don't know, but..." Rapunzel cupped her chin, and then she discreetly looked around the shop. "Kiss each other, maybe?" she whisper-shouted, and Anna swore her eyes would pop anytime soon.

Apparently, Elsa and Belle also had the same idea. Anna and Hans kissing? That was definitely not appealing. She was already having a hard time watching them spend time together; no way she could accept them kissing! But... they did kiss before.

"No!" Anna blurted. "Us? Kissing?! No way!"

"Oh come on! You could easily fake it! It's chocolate, and everybody loves chocolate!" the girl giggled lightly, eyes darting among the two redheads in amusement.

"Aren't you going to get in trouble with your boss for suggesting something like that?!" Anna crossed her arms and stared at the flyer in horror. "The chocolates are tempting, but no! Not a chance!"

"That's some serious rejection skills you got there, Anna." Hans snickered and Anna shot him a glare. "But, yeah. I don't think faking it will be a good idea. She's already like a sister to me."

"Sisterzoned?" the girl asked curiously.

"More like brother-zoned." Anna snorted and when Hans frowned at her, she stuck out her tongue. "You started it."

"That's too bad, then." The girl shrugged. "But there's still a month anyway. If you have your own lovers then, maybe you could come. I'd happily take you, but unfortunately, I'll be working here then." She winked.

"I appreciate the thought." Anna giggled and looked at the flyer again.

Elsa curled her fingers to ease the trembling. She had no idea what was happening, but it looked like it was safe to assume that Anna and Hans weren't going out.  _Of course_. If they were, Anna would surely tell her. But then... what was the use of this double date?

"Breathe, and do it right this time," Belle whispered. "Don't look at me for help when talking to her."

Steeling her resolve, Elsa nodded. Anna was staring intently at the flyer while Hans talked about random things with the girl behind the counter. After taking in a few deep breaths, Elsa took a step, and another one, and another one until she was walking towards Anna.  _No more running away_ , she repeated as she forcefully held on to any confidence she might possibly have.

"What's that?" Elsa leaned close to the girl.

Anna stiffened and snapped her head to the side to see Elsa's face only a few inches away from her. Their shoulders were touching and Elsa was close. So close to a point Anna could smell her natural scent of mint and vanilla.

"P-Promo... for the park's anniversary." Anna looked back to the flyer, forcing her heart to stop beating rapidly.

"For couples?"

"Yeah." Anna was shocked to hear her own voice raise a few octaves. "A-Anyway! Oh my god! Hans, you finished all the samples!" Anna accused, desperate to distance herself from the woman standing beside her.

Anna could feel the softness of Elsa's breasts on her arm. The last time they were this close was when Elsa hugged her that day she came back from Hans' apartment.  _Hold your shit together_ , she mentally cursed herself. Elsa was here on a date with Belle. She had no right to feel happy that Elsa was leaning close to her. The last thing she would want to do was to make Elsa a cheater.

"Yeah, bad idea. I think my throat's starting to act up." Hans coughed and looked at Anna with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "I'll come back in a few minutes! Need to get myself a drink!"

"Wait!" Anna's hand stopped in midair as she watched helplessly at Hans' retreating back. "That... stupid excuse of a sideburn!" She huffed and held the flyer with both hands.

"Tough luck." Rapunzel giggled.

"Right." Anna blew a frustrated huff, and then she turned to look at Rapunzel again. "So yeah, w-we can't exactly go."

"Just keep it. We're giving those away anyway," Rapunzel waved a hand.

"Fine." Anna looked sadly at the flyer.

"Y-You want one too?" Rapunzel asked Elsa, making Anna hold her breath. She couldn't deny that it could be a good chance for Elsa and Belle to be on another date, but the thought that they'd have to... kiss to prove that they were a couple?

"No," Elsa said. "Anna already have one. We're good."

A wave of emotions passed through Anna, with confusion being the prominent one. Was Elsa planning to take her flyer so she could take Belle with her? Because, honestly, Anna didn't have anyone to bring to that promo. She was single, and she already had enough of faking a relationship.

So, really, what does 'we're good' even mean?


	25. Double Date Part 2: Unheard

Elsa's heart thundered in her chest as she eyed the ominous gates to the rollercoaster.  _Why are there a lot of people lining up for something dangerous?!_ She could feel her lunch twist, turn, and threaten to burst from sheer anxiousness. She kept reminding herself that this was for Anna. That if Anna could ride the carousel for her, she could ride the rollercoaster for Anna.

"Are you sure you want to ride it?" Anna's voice snapped Elsa from her worried state. "If you're nervous, you don't have to. You're starting to look sick."

"It  _is_  scary," Elsa admitted. "B-But I think... I think I want to try. I mean, I wouldn't know if I can do it unless I try, right?"

Anna didn't say anything, just taking the moment to stare at Elsa. In truth, she wanted to run away and back out at the last minute because seeing Elsa panicking but fighting it for Belle twisted her gut. It hurt to see Elsa doing her best and facing her fears for someone else, but at the same time, she also wanted to support her. If only it wa—

"But I only want to go if you're with me."

The moment those words were spoken, everything in Anna's world stilled.  _Did I hear that right?_ She licked her dry lips and it was then that she noticed that she actually averted her gaze sometime during her deep thought. Slowly, she lifted her eyes again to see a pink hue on Elsa's cheeks. Even her eyes were averted to the side, but those words were obviously meant to her since Hans and Belle were already off to the rollercoaster. _I swear he's gonna get it from me later_ , she mentally noted.

"You... can't say that." Anna knew her words were weak, but it was enough to make Elsa look at her again. "You can't depend on me while you're with your date, Elsa. It looked like things were going well with you too."

"Well," Elsa drawled, curling her fingers to stop the trembling. "We do get along. She's a good friend of mine."

"Friend? I thought you wanted to try things out with her?"

"I didn't say we were dating."

Anna opened her mouth to say something, but words failed her. What was she supposed to say? She called the deal off because Elsa said she wanted to try things out with Belle. Now, she was telling Anna that they weren't a thing. What exactly was she supposed to think?

Anna's train of thoughts was cut off the moment she was pulled in closer. Literally. Elsa's arms were wrapped around her and she barely understood what was going on. Elsa was hugging her hard enough so she couldn't pull away, but gentle enough to not suffocate her.

It did little to make her breathe. Her heart pumped with much vigor and her mind was getting foggy. This was the closest she had been to Elsa this day, and it felt like heaven. Not that she knew what heaven felt like. She was having a hard time denying herself such happiness. She didn't want to savor the moment because she knew that Belle was still in the picture. They may not be going out, but Elsa did say she liked the girl.

"I miss you."

Elsa's voice was soft and gentle, but it cut through the muffled voices around the theme park. For a brief moment, Anna hoped that Hans and Belle would go ahead and ride the rollercoaster without them, but she knew better than to keep living the dream. It would be rude to Elsa.

"I didn't go away, though," Anna snorted, trying to alleviate the sudden tension in the air.

"I still miss you," Elsa repeated. "We barely have time alone together. I thought... I-I don't really know what I thought. It's just... I missed you."

"You were the one always going to the gym." Anna bit her lower lip, hoping Elsa didn't hear the way her voice cracked a little by the end.

Elsa nuzzled her face on the side of Anna's head. It sent shivers down the redhead's spine and it took all she had to push down the hope that was slowly being ignited by Elsa's actions. "You were the one always spending time with Hans."

What was she supposed to say? Apologize for spending time with Hans? Anna couldn't very well say that she couldn't bear being alone in their apartment with nothing but memories of Elsa. She didn't want to retort something about the blonde always being with Belle either. That would be unfair.

"I'm sorry." Anna started to debate whether she should hug Elsa back or not. "I-I know that those three days were... really bad and probably senseless, but I swear we were only doing a project."

"We're okay, right?" Elsa asked gently. "You'll always stay with me, right? You won't hate me?"

The question made Anna knit her brows. "What?! Of course, I won't hate you!" Anna tried to push herself away, wanting to see Elsa's face, but she was unable to move due to being held tight. "Elsa? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Is it weird... that I want to spend my time with you?" Elsa tightened her hold on Anna's petite body. "That I... I didn't like you staying over somewhere else? That I hated it when you didn't tell me where Hans lives? That I panicked when I didn't even know where you were, what you're eating, or if you were able to sleep well?"

Suddenly, tears pricked the side of Anna's eyes. Why was Elsa acting like this? Why was she saying these things? What was she trying to achieve? Was this only because they haven't talked for a while? It was true they haven't spent much time together, but she had never been clingy! This was Elsa, damn it!

Anna fought hard to keep the tears at bay. Her mind was telling her that this was only Elsa being protective again, but her heart was swelling big enough that it overwhelmed her. She heard Elsa take a shuddering breath and let her go, but before she could react, a loud clanking and squeaking of something metallic made her cringe. As soon as the noise dissipated, she opened her eyes to see an unusual shade of red on Elsa's face.

"S-Sorry, what?" Anna asked, trying to get ringing out of her ears. Elsa's eyebrows rise a tiny bit, but Anna could only look at her in confusion. She wasn't able to hear it, but she was certain Elsa said something before the huge drop tower did a loud ringing noise, signaling the end of the ride.

"It's nothing." Elsa shook her head with a tiny smile. "I guess I was just... worried. About you."

An awkward silence fell upon them. Anna didn't know what to do with herself, so she did what she always does when feeling awkward: twiddle with her thumbs. Back there, it looked like Elsa was trying to tell her something. Was that it? Was she badly hurt about her staying away?  _If she went missing for days, I'd probably panic too... even before I got these feelings,_ Anna mentally noted.

"I'm sorry. I'll be more careful next time. I think... I think I'll also panic if I'm the one in your position. I mean, we've always been together. I don't think it's weird."

When Elsa didn't say anything as she stared, Anna felt increasingly guilty. She had no idea that Elsa would take it this strongly if she ever left. She was happy because that meant Elsa cared deeply for her, but at the same time, she hated how she worried the blonde all because she couldn't sort her feelings out.

"Thank you," Elsa said with a gentle smile.

 _I wonder when it was... that she started having this much effect on me_ , Anna mused. When was the last time she saw that smile on Elsa's face? When was the last time her heart fluttered this much? She couldn't remember, but at the same time, everything else felt so new.

"You still up for that?" Anna pointed to the rollercoaster. She giggled when the color lightly drained from Elsa's cheeks. "You really don't have to if you can't."

Elsa's throat bobbed up and down slowly, and then she frowned. "Who says I can't?" Elsa smirked and grabbed Anna by the wrist, dragging her towards the gigantic loops. "You'll be with me. I'll be fine," she said as she focused ahead, oblivious of Anna's full-blown blush.

As soon as they reached the line, Elsa insisted they line up normally. She reasoned out how it would be rude for the other people who actually lined up after Hans and Belle, in which Anna only agreed with a hearty laugh. There weren't too many people compared to earlier, and they were all going to enter the ride at the same time anyway. She'd just make the most of this moment and enjoy what little time she had with Elsa.

... _or so I thought_.

Anna's eyes bore holes in the seat near the end of the coaster. "Wait, did they just...? Are those two actually the ones together in front?!"

"I guess so," Elsa shrugged, wondering how Belle was able to get Hans to agree.

Anna swallowed audibly, mentally cursing Hans for meddling, and then she focused on the fidgeting blonde with her. Elsa was obviously afraid despite her rather daring announcement from a few minutes ago. It made Anna feel bad, but at the same time, she couldn't stop the tiny smile that curled on her lips. It reminded her of the previous times she ever dragged Elsa on similar rides.

"Sorry, looks like you won't get to sit with Belle on this one," Anna smiled apologetically.

"What?" Elsa stuttered. "Oh. No, no. It's fine. I don't think she'll be able to handle me here, anyway."

Anna couldn't stop a frown.  _So, Belle can't handle a fidgety Elsa?_ Well, that definitely wouldn't do. Then again, what if this was only something inside Elsa's head? She wasn't prone to negative thoughts. Anna wasn't the only one who could get pessimistic at times, but Elsa too.

"Come on." Anna jumped in her seat before offering a hand. "You asked for this. Stop prolonging your own agony and sit down. I won't go anywhere."

Elsa reached for the proffered hand, and Anna nearly shrieked from how cold the touch was.  _She's really nervous_ , she thought. It was almost a nice contrast to her own clammy hands. With all her willpower, she set aside her own feelings for a while and focused on relaxing Elsa instead. She squeezed the pale hand and gently pulled her into the seat and, once they were both settled, intertwined their fingers together.

"You'll be fine, Elsa. I'm with you, and I'm used to you squeezing the life out of my hand when we do something like this," Anna assured, surprised that she didn't stutter. She broke out into a huge toothy grin when Elsa only responded with a shaky smile and subtle nod.

* * *

With a massive sigh, Anna returned her gaze to the still-closed door of the restroom, tempted to go inside and ask if Elsa was okay. She was the one keeping Elsa calm as soon as the ride ended, but when she saw Belle's worried face, she insisted that the brunette take Elsa to the restroom while giving a stupid excuse of buying water.

"They're not done yet?" Hans asked, carrying two bottles of water. "Here."

"Thanks." Anna took a bottle. "Yeah, they're still inside."

"Did you check up on them? See if Elsa's okay?" Anna shook her head in the negative. " What's wrong? I thought things were working fine with you back there."

"It was, but not the way you're hoping for." Anna leaned on one post. "We talked about the results of my impulsiveness. You know, for staying over at your place for a long time."

"Ah." Hans took big gulps from his bottle. "You were hugging and blushing, so I thought you already told her. Why didn't you?"

"She likes Belle."

"They're not going out." Anna's eyes widened in shock of how he'd known. "It's what Belle told me earlier. You two took so long and I figured I'd ask questions."

"You didn't have to go far as to isolate us."

"Actually, yes. Yes, I think I had to," Hans deadpanned. "It looked like the awkwardness around you two cleared up, but you're still running away from the real issue here."

"They're not going out, but Elsa did say she wanted to try things out with her," Anna reasoned, face dropping at the thought. "Belle looked genuinely worried for her after the ride too. It looks like they're getting along. I want... to support Elsa in this as much as I can."

"Doesn't change the fact that they're not going out."

"Maybe." Anna looked up at the sky. "But it doesn't change the fact that Elsa also said she liked her. It's the first time she ever said something like that to me, you know? We've been friends since forever, but it was the first time she told me about wanting to pursue a relationship with someone," she said with a dejected smile. "I think I'm... already okay with this. There's no need to change anything."

"You say that now because they're not a thing," Hans pointed out and took another sip of his drink.

Anna, feeling hurt from his blunt statement, fiddled with the bottle before deciding that her throat actually felt too dry. She swallowed the liquid until there was only a half left in the bottle and mentally sighed for feeling refreshed even just by a little bit. After a few minutes of standing idly outside the restroom, the two busied themselves with the crane game a few ways from it to pass the time.

"Come on, come on." Anna bit her lower lip and frowned. "Easy... eaaasy..."

"Anna, I swear if you don't shut up, I'll drop this thing."

"Don't you dare!" Anna slapped Hans' shoulder but immediately regretted it. The stuffed toy dropped.

"Damn it!"

"You suck!"

"Well, why don't you try it out, princess?" Hans dared and offered some token to her. Anna let out a loud puff of air and snatched the token from him. He grinned, stepping aside to give her some space. "After you."

Anna nibbled on her lip and tried to pick the stuffed toy she had her eye on since earlier. There were other toys which were far cuter and more adorable than that, but she didn't want any of those. It  _has_  to be that snowman toy.

"Come on, come ooooon." Anna held her breath as the crane slowly moved. She thanked the lucky stars that Hans was able to drag the toy closer and closer to the hole. She only hoped it wouldn't fall during the short distance it had to travel now.

Anna was too engrossed in the task at hand to notice Elsa and Belle coming back from their long rest. The massive headache Elsa had was now completely gone, and she couldn't help but smiled when she saw a focused redhead. It was the same face the girl always wore every time she drew something: eyebrows knitted together, a tiny pink muscle poking from inside her mouth, and a subtle blush on her freckled cheeks.

Beautiful.

So beautiful that Elsa wanted to get her attention. She knew it was asking for trouble, but she couldn't help it. That was why she leaned in quietly and waited until the toy was hanging on top of the hole before she...

"Wha—?!" Anna snapped her head to the side quite abruptly, heart stuttering when her nose lightly touched Elsa's.

Elsa did her best not to look shocked by the sudden closeness. "Hi."

"Wha...? What are you...?"

Elsa's scent was intoxicating that Anna could barely form a coherent sentence. Why did Elsa blow on her ear? Why was she so close? Why was she smiling? She wasn't even moving or leaning back. Anna felt like swooning but forced herself not to. Thankfully, she heard a loud clang of something, making her snap out of her reverie.

"Damn! You could've tried it first! We could've saved lots of tokens!" Hans sighed.

"You're the guy!" Anna snatched the stuffed toy from him. "At least try and get a romantic bone in your body!"

"Yeaaaaah, no." Hans snorted before cringing at the weird looking stuff. "Why that snowman? It was hard to get and looks... weird."

"It's not weird! It's cute!" Anna wrapped the snowman in a protective hug.

Hans raised an eyebrow. "It is?"

"Can I see?" Elsa asked, the reaction from Hans catching her interest.

"What?" There was a tiny smile on Elsa's lips that had Anna incapable of refusing. Not trusting herself to say anything more, she shyly loosened the hug and showed the snowman to Elsa.

It was hideous.

At least that was the first thought that entered Elsa's mind the moment she saw the stuffed toy. She knew that Anna had an eye for cuteness, but this particular toy was far from cute. This time, she agreed with Hans.

"That's... unique." Elsa managed to say. "The nose, i-it's, uhm... orange."

"... _forgot_." Anna muttered, but it was loud enough for Elsa to hear if only the last word. "Anyway! It's cute for me so whatever!"

Elsa's eyebrows furrowed. Did she say something wrong? What did Anna mean when she said 'forgot'? She forgot why she wanted the snowman? She forgot that it wasn't cute? Was that it? Elsa was beating herself up because she couldn't bear the fact that Anna just bolted to Hans' side again, smiling when he ruffled her hair.

"What happened?" Belle asked.

"I... I'm not sure," Elsa answered truthfully as she looked at the duo.

It was a letdown when Anna wasn't able to hear her earlier confession. If it wasn't for the loud mechanical noise from one ride, maybe things wouldn't be the same as how it was now. But what kind of change would it be? If only she had the courage to say it again, maybe she wouldn't be wondering and cowering about different possibilities until now.  _The one time I was able to say it out loud and she didn't hear me_ , she sighed inwardly.

Why couldn't things go her way for once?


	26. Double Date Part 3: Enough

Anna was adorable as she chewed on her cotton candy while hugging the snowman. It made Elsa want to drag her away. Maybe she should? But Anna looked comfortable around Hans. Then again, they weren't going out. It couldn't be that bad, right?

"So..." Belle began. "What happened to your project?"

All eyes snapped to the brunette who was also munching on her cotton candy. They had been sitting in silence for a while now and Belle was the first to have the urge to try and break the tension in the air. But Elsa wasn't sure if the chosen topic was nice, and she nudged the brunette's knee with her own as a sign to stop, only to receive a nudge back.

"What?" Anna asked, confused.

"That day Elsa and I went ice skating. You said something about working on a project?" Belle tilted her head to the side. "What were you working on?"

Anna didn't expect Belle to talk to her, let alone about that day. She knew that Belle wasn't fond of her if the way she looked at her before was any indication. "W-We're working on an animation," Anna answered, mentally cursing herself for stuttering.

"Really? Do you specialize in 2D or 3D?" Belle wondered, and even though she was smiling, it only made Anna feel bad. She hated a woman who was being kind and gentle to her at the moment.

"2D," Anna informed with a smile.

"That's amazing! I'd like to see it! I mean, if you don't mind." Belle let out a nervous giggle. "I watch animations, but it's the first time I get to know someone who can actually animate."

Anna looked at Hans for help. He seemed calmer than her, which was fairly obvious. He didn't have any qualms about the brunette. In fact, he didn't give a damn about Anna's current predicament. As much as Anna hated how composed he was, he was also her source of strength at the moment. If he wasn't with her, she could've lost it long ago.

"We're in the middle of finalizing it, but we can show it to you once we're done," Anna replied as honestly as she could. "How about you? Do you always have research papers? Because Elsa's always busy with those, and she even goes to the gym."

"It's common the closer we get to our thesis papers," Belle explained.

"I see." Anna took a small bite out of her cotton candy. "Please look after Elsa. She tends to overwork a lot." She smirked when Elsa choked on her beverage. It was a short-lived amusement because Belle started rubbing circles on the blonde's back.  _She looks after Elsa, alright_ , she mentally noted as she bit her cotton candy to stop herself from blurting it out.

Elsa, on the other hand, felt awkward. She already felt bad for dragging Belle to this date; Anna just had to say those things out loud. It was both embarrassing and horrific. Almost like Anna was handing her over to Belle. It didn't feel right. She knew she had to clear things up, especially when it was a misunderstanding she made herself, but she didn't want to say it in front of other people. If Anna was going to know, she wanted it to happen in private where she knew she could be completely honest.

"Uhm... I-I'll try?" Belle looked at Elsa for assistance but even the blonde was too lost for words. "But I think... I think I'm going to need your help on that, Anna."

Elsa couldn't understand what to feel when Anna simply smiled. A smile she had never seen before. She had seen Anna smile countless times but never like this, and an ugly feeling bubbled up inside her chest. One thing was clear: she didn't like that smile. Not at all.

"Hans?" The guy's hand stopped in midair, a cotton candy on hand. "Where do you live? I want to know."

"Uh..." Hans drawled, looking at Anna for help.

"I want to know where you live and if you live alone," Elsa stated firmly, capturing his attention again. She wanted to hear an answer from  _him_ , and not an answer he came up with solely after looking at Anna.

"Right." Hans crossed his arms on top of the table and leaned forward. "I live in Westergaard apartment with my little sister, Ariel. She's a freshman in high school."

"Was she with you when Anna stayed over?"

"Yeah."

Elsa looked at the female redhead who was too shocked at the sudden hoard of questions. "Anna?"

After snapping herself awake with the help of Hans nudging on her knees, Anna reached for her phone. She started scrolling and looking for the pictures she had with Hans' little sister. Ariel was in high school and her schedule was strict so she would only come home late in the afternoon. Once Anna found some photographs, she handed her phone to Elsa.

Relief flooded Elsa's being at the sight of a short and bubbly-looking redhead with Anna and Hans. She knew that the picture was real and that it happened during those three days simply because the things in the background were Anna's belongings, and she could make out little traits of Ariel based on Anna's stories back when she was still Hans' girlfriend.

"Good." Elsa sighed, smiling at the way Anna looked like in the picture.

 _Stop confusing me_ , Anna pleaded inside her head. The conversation they had before the ride combined with this particular action? Elsa had always been protective, and it was hard to grasp what this particular protectiveness meant. Despite her spoken words to Hans, Anna knew that she was still hoping for Elsa to feel the same way. However, sitting across her was Elsa and the girl she boldly told her about.

"Say," Anna chimed. It caught Elsa's attention and the blonde slowly offered the phone back to her. She muttered silent thanks and took it back while skillfully avoiding touching Elsa's fingers. "Is it okay if we part here? There's something I want to tell Hans."

The tension her words created went unnoticed by Anna because the only thing she could think about was running away. From Elsa, from Belle, and from the reality of what was going on. She knew that if she stayed for much longer, she might break down and cry. If Elsa would know that she was crying because of her, surely, the blonde would feel bad. She was supposed to be okay with this arrangement. It was her who suggested it, after all. She was supposed to be fine, but she wasn't.

"Alone?" Elsa asked, and Anna gave a nod. "Do you have to do it now? It's still early."

"It's not going to take long," Anna promised.

"So why can't it wait?" Elsa wondered. "What's so important that you have to tell him now and in private?"

"Well, it's..." Anna paused, noticing the hurt that glinted in Elsa's eyes. She realized that the blonde might still feel bad because of the distance between them before. "Actually, yeah. Now that I think about it, it's probably not that important."

Another silence fell upon them with Anna unable to avert her gaze from the tiny crack on the table. She didn't know what expression everybody wore, but she knew they were catching glimpses of her. It was awkward, to say the least, but this was not what she needed. Of all the days Elsa had to question something, it had to be now.

"Okay then," Elsa said after a moment of silence. The distinct sound of a chair scraping along the concrete invaded Anna's ears, along with the muffled voices of the people surrounding them. "There's something I want to talk to you about."

Anna shrieked as Elsa grabbed her wrist and drag her away from their dates. The uneasiness she felt skyrocketed; it was uncomfortable. She wanted to avoid being alone with Elsa, but there she was, being dragged away like the lovesick puppy she already was. It hurt, but she couldn't fight back.

"E-Elsa, wait! Stop!" Anna pleaded. "We left those two! T-They're... I mean, they're probably awkward a—"

"Why did you ask for this double date, Anna?" Elsa asked as she came to a halt, forcing Anna to stop too. "Back in the chocolate shop, you and Hans said... faking a date for the promo wouldn't be nice. That means you're not going out, right?"

"What?" A sudden wave of panic enveloped Anna. "That's—"

"Are you giving him a chance?" Elsa asked, stopping her from blurting out some stupid excuse. "You were gone for days, and when you came back, you suggested this date. A-Are you giving him a chance again? Is he... Is he asking you to be his girlfriend again?"

Anna's mouth opened to say something, but all she could do was breathe heavily, silently. Her hands were trembling, and she was slightly thankful that Elsa was holding her wrist, not her hand. What was she going to say? Could she pull off her usual cheeky grin and say something the past her would be able to say without any problem? Maybe she should just agree with what Elsa was saying. But... she was never a good liar. She could hide secrets, but she couldn't lie. At least not to Elsa.

"He's not," Anna admitted. "He's a really good friend, but that's all he is. He's not asking me for anything."  _Sort of_. "T-That aside! I was just really about to ask him something about... school."

"Why this date, then?" Elsa pressed as she let go of Anna's wrist and faced her completely. "Why did you ask for this date, Anna? With him? What is this for?"

Anna squeezed the snowman toy she was thankfully holding when Elsa decided to drag her away. "We haven't been spending a lot of time together, right? A-And then you said you wanted to go out with Belle, so I thought... I want to get to know her better. I mean, she's the girl you like and I'm your best friend. It's a little weird that I don't know her that much, right?"

"Then..." Elsa began, voice gentle but also equally stern. "Why didn't you just ask for the three of us to get together?"

Anna stiffened, her eyes boring holes on the floor.  _That_ was a question she most definitely didn't have an excuse to. It was as if she was trapped with absolutely no way of wiggling her way out of this.

"Why, Anna?" Elsa asked again. "I know I agreed on this too, but why did you ask for it? If that's your only reason, why did you have to invite Hans too?"

 _This is so unfair_ , Anna frowned inwardly to whomever it was that forced her into this situation. Why was it that the more she wanted to avoid something, the more life was throwing her into said something? Hans was one of the people who'd push her, but even without him, it was as if life was already playing her for some cruel prank. Why couldn't things go her way for once?

"I'm sorry."

Anna blinked. Contrary to how much she wanted to avoid Elsa's gaze, she quickly snapped her eyes to look at the girl's pained expression. There was a deep blush on her cheeks, her eyes looking downcast. If Anna was to compare her to anything, it would be that of a forlorn puppy. She knew this look well, and it was something she never appreciated.

"Back in the gym..." Elsa began, voice shaky. "I was too strict, didn't I? Maybe even more than your parents probably would. I didn't mean for you to think that I only see you as someone who always needs assistance." Elsa then lowered her head. "I-I guess you're more comfortable sharing things with him now."

Anna pulled the stuff toy closer to her chest, feeling her fingers tremble. Elsa looked like she was blaming herself, and it broke her heart. Elsa, her sweet and selfless best friend, was blaming herself for something  _she_  messed up with.

"That's not it." Whatever hold Anna had on her sensible side slowly slipped away at the sight of Elsa letting her off easy like always. "You're so unfair, Elsa," she whimpered, making the blonde look at her again.

"W-What?"

"Why is it... that even if I try to act normal, you always notice if something was off?" Anna asked, fighting back the burning sensation in her eyes. "You told me... that if we have a problem, you want to talk it out. Even when I told you we're okay, you still ask if that was true."

"An—"

"Why can't I hide anything from you? Every time I'm down, you know the right words to say. You... I don't know what to do if you keep doing that." She admitted, head lowering and arms hugging her toy for dear life.

"W-What did I do? Anna, I'm o—"

"That!" Anna cut Elsa off again. "Those things you do unconsciously! How you'd always be kind, how you always know if something's bothering me, how you'd always blame yourself for something I did, how you always cooked for me and help me out with anything and everything! How you... how you treat me..."

"Why wouldn't I treat you like that?" Elsa asked, clearly offended that Anna would think otherwise. "Why won't I know if something's bothering you? I've known you all my life. You're not making any sense, Anna. You're special to me, and there's nothing weird about that!"

"Don't say that," Anna pleaded, hot tears now rolling down her cheeks. "Don't say that I'm special because I'm not."

"You are," Elsa promised, taking a step closer to Anna, only to stop when Anna took a step back. "Anna, you're special to me. Why can't you see that?"

Anna bit her lower lip and with her eyes shut, her tears fell like a broken dam. Her current emotional state made it harder to voice out her own thoughts. It hurt because she knew that Elsa was telling her the truth, but their definition of 'special' was different.

"You're important to me, Anna," Elsa repeated, and she took another tentative step. "And this distance between us? It hurts. I don't know when it started, but I know you feel it too. It's like you're close but not entirely with me. I know I always go to the gym, but when I'm ever home, you're not there either. It feels like... like you're avoiding me."

With shaking hands, Anna pulled the toy closer to herself, feeling some slight comfort from an inanimate creature. Her lower lip was bruised because of her persistent biting, but it wasn't enough. Her heaving chest a testament to the effort she put just to not completely break down in front of Elsa.

"Maybe I am," Anna whispered, but loud enough for Elsa to hear. "Maybe because I don't want to mess with your chances with Belle... or maybe I don't want to see you two together."

"W-What?"

"Aside from me, you never let anyone else inside your room, let alone sleep beside you," Anna began, hand tightening its hold on the snowman's leg. "You don't even let me use your mug, and even  _I_ can't drag you to a simple celebration. But you did all of those with Belle," she pointed out, and then she looked at Elsa's slightly shocked and confused face. "How am I any special, Elsa? Because we grew up together?"

"No! Anna, I—"

"Tell me you love her, Elsa," Anna demanded, almost too desperate. "Tell me you want to be with her, and that she's the girl you naturally fell in love with.  _Please._ "

Elsa was shocked. Standing before her was the woman who had her affection for years, vulnerable and crying and telling her these things. She wasn't dense, and she knew where Anna was going with this. It was the very reason why she was shocked in the first place. To hear these things... from Anna, of all people.

"I won't," Elsa denied, stepping closer to the redhead. Anna only stepped back again, but this time, Elsa was determined. She walked closer until Anna hit one of the railings surrounding a ride, unable to walk back anymore. "I won't say that, Anna, because that's not how I feel."

"Stop," Anna warned, but it was weak and Elsa could see that she was trembling.

"I won't. I don't love her, Anna. Belle is ju—"

"A friend? Don't give me that, Elsa! It's not what I see! It's not what you said! You... You! Just..." Anna stopped, closing her eyes shut.

Elsa knew then that Anna's emotions were out of whack. If she was crying, face flushing, hands holding on to something so tight until her knuckles turned white, and stuttering so much to a point she couldn't complete a sentence, it meant that her feelings were overwhelming her. Simple words and promises might change meaning throughout the years, but habitual actions won't change just as easily. Anna's little gestures, no matter how small, Elsa knew them all.

"Anna, I—!" Elsa blinked and it took her a few seconds to fully understand what happened. The moment she did, she quickly turned around to see Anna bolting away from her. "Anna!" she yelled and ran, but stopped when she bumped on some large figure, sending her back by two steps.

"Hey, watch it!" said the guy.

"Sorry!" Elsa apologized in haste. The guy didn't seem satisfied, but at that moment, she didn't care and simply looked back to the place she saw Anna ran. "ANNA!"

Ignoring the curious glances from strangers, Elsa ran and ran, unsure of where her legs would take her. The place was crowded, and she could  _hear_ her heartbeat when she couldn't see that familiar shade of strawberry blonde anymore.


	27. Desperate Measures

"Elsa!" Belle was running towards her. "Have you seen her yet?"

"No." Elsa panted heavily.

Sweat glistened on both of their foreheads. They were lucky enough that the sun wasn't at its highest peak, but it didn't stop both of them from getting exhausted - and that was saying something considering how they were both regulars in the gym. They'd been running around the theme park, checked the surrounding areas, tried asking strangers, and calling Anna's phone, but there was no sign of her.

"Hey!" Both of their heads turned to see Hans running towards them. "Any luck? I didn't find her."

"No." Belle shook her head, and then she looked at Elsa's tensed face. "Elsa, maybe you should go home? You don't look too well."

"I'm fine. I have to look for her. You two can go. Thank you for helping out, but this... I have to fix this myself."

"Elsa, I think Belle's right," Hans said. "You should go home and rest."

"This is no time to be resting!" Elsa said louder than necessary, and then she ran her hands through her hair. "She's crying, Hans! I-I need to look for her! I have to see her! W-We need to talk!"

"In this messed up state?" Hans frowned. "You're panicking, Elsa, and it's not doing anyone any good! Look, I get it, okay? You had an argument, but that's exactly why you have to calm down! We're talking about Anna here! She's impulsive and quick to assume a lot of things, but that's why she needs you!"

Elsa rubbed her temples, unable to believe what had happened back there no matter how many times it replayed inside her head. The shock of hearing those things from Anna, it hasn't gone away. And Anna was definitely missing. Missing and avoiding all of her attempts when calling. In fact, her phone couldn't be reached.

"You have to calm down." Belle placed a hand on Elsa's shoulder. "I'll keep looking for her, but you have to go home and rest. Besides, what if she's already there? She doesn't have a place to stay over anyway. Unless..." she trailed off, looking at Hans.

"Hell no. I've already been dragged into this more than I've bargained for." Hans dismissed the idea with a cringe before looking at Elsa again. "Elsa, I swear if she ever comes to me, I'll bring her back to you."

"Did you know?" Elsa asked, voice barely above a whisper.

Hans blinked and, for a moment, just stared at her. After the pregnant pause, he started scratching the side of his head. There was a subtle smile on his lips, but along with it was a hint of hurt and longing. The sight made Elsa's heart clench badly, it hurts. She felt guilty, worried, and annoyed, but above all else, confusion went on top.

"Why?" Elsa asked, genuinely concerned. "Why didn't she say anything? A-All this time, I... I thought..."

"I  _did_ tell you to be straightforward, didn't I?" Hans asked with a lopsided smile.

"B-But you... She's always with you! How was I supposed to...? You said you're going to get her back!"

"Is now really the time for us to be talking about this?" Hans asked instead of answering. "Look, I know you're worried and shocked about everything that's going on. I mean, she told you something, and then she ran away crying. If you have questions about me, I can tell you what you want to know some other time. Right now, we need to know where she is."

Elsa was trembling, whether it was because of the sudden information or the adrenaline, she didn't know. She couldn't convince herself that it was real. All she had planned was to tell Anna what she felt, but it ended up happening the other way around. How? Why? She didn't know. She didn't do anything for Anna to feel the same way... so how come?

"Elsa, let's keep in touch, okay? I'll tell you if I find her," Belle said, squeezing her shoulder once.

"I'll be helping too. We can cover more ground with two people." Hans offered, and then he spoke again when Elsa opened her mouth. "No, Elsa, you're not coming with us. Like you said, I do still have feelings for Anna, and that means you're not the only one worried about her. But you have to go home! If she ever decides to come back, you don't want to miss her! You know what she's capable of doing when she's emotionally wrecked!"

Elsa paused, eyes darting between the two. She knew they were both worried about Anna. Maybe they were even worried about her too. She still had questions, but Hans was right. Now wasn't the time for it. Anna's wellbeing and whereabouts were what matter the most.

The trip back to their apartment was the longest fifteen minutes of Elsa's life. It was torture, but as soon as she reached the place, she wasted no time and immediately looked around. When she didn't see Anna in the living room, dining room, kitchen, and bathroom, she went towards the girl's room. For a moment, she stood silently in front of the door. The door that always opened for her. The door that never locked her out. Will it open for her now? Was Anna even inside?

Elsa lifted a trembling hand to knock, but then she stopped. She didn't know if the girl was inside, and if she was, would she even talk?  _I'm sure she doesn't even want to see me_ , she thought grimly. But it wasn't the best time to be hesitating, and so she took a deep breath and slowly, gently opened the door. Her eyes landed on the bed. Anna wasn't home.

Honestly, after having such a conversation, she wasn't expecting the girl to be there. Why would Anna go home to the place where she'd only see Elsa? Still, where was she? Anna was an emotional wreck when she ran away. She was crying and carrying a stuffed toy; it was practically screaming how she was vulnerable at that moment.

"Ngh." Elsa turned around to go look for Anna again, but then her breath caught the moment she heard her phone ring. Because she was so anxious and on edge, she didn't get to see who it was and quickly picked it up. "Hello?!" she asked, voice rising a few octaves.

" **Elsie?** " Elsa panicked even more when she realized who was calling. " **You sound fidgety. Are you alright?** "

"Mommy..." Elsa whispered. "I... No. Actually, I'm not."

" **What's wrong?** " Bulda asked, voice laced with worry.

Elsa hesitated. Maybe it would be better if she panicked alone? But, they deserved to know. They left Anna in her hands, and now she failed them miserably. Anna ran away from her without any hint or clue as to where she would be going.

"A-Anna left," Elsa admitted, stuttering. "W-We kind of had an argument while we were outside, and she ran away. She won't answer my calls and I... I don't know where she is."

" **Oh, so that's it.** "

The simple response caught Elsa off guard. Was that all she had to say? Shouldn't she panic along with Elsa? Anna left after an argument that wasn't even supposed to be an argument in the first place! Elsa was already a total wreck and was just about to ask for a search and rescue party!

"Mommy, I'm sorry. It's... Anna, she..." Elsa stopped, unsure of what to say.

" **It's alright, Elsie,** " Bulda assured. " **Anna's not a child anymore. We both know that she's impulsive, but she can be responsible too. Believe me, I know.** "

Elsa's chest grew tighter the more Bulda tried to console her. Of course, she also knew that Anna could be responsible. She knew, but she was worried anyway. "B-But she was crying. Mommy, I... What if she got into an accident?"

" **Elsie, listen to me. I want you to rest. Sleep or drink some hot chocolate to calm down,** " Bulda suggested. " **Anna called me earlier. She's on her way here.** "

"What?!" Elsa sputtered. "B-But why? W-What about school?! Her break! I-It's—"

" **You know how their finals are all project-based, right? She promised that she finished all of them.** "

Elsa held her breath. Anna once told her that she wanted to go home early for Olaf's birthday, but she wasn't expecting it to be  _this_ early. Granted, it didn't look planned either. She was worried about the girl's projects, but at the same time, she wasn't. Everything just happened so fast to a point she didn't even know what to worry about first.

Her thoughts were, for the first time in a long time, uncoordinated.

"W-Was she supposed to come home today?" Elsa asked, voice cracking.

" **I actually called about that,** " Bulda admitted. " **She wasn't supposed to come home until Friday. I was going to ask you if something happened, but you gave me an answer before I had the chance to.** "

Maybe it was the exhaustion finally catching up, but Elsa's knees gave up and she sat on Anna's soft bed. How long had Anna been feeling this way? Had she been jealous of Belle this whole time? Why didn't she say anything? She was supposed to be the type of girl who'd jump and force her way through! She always did it that way! So... why?!

"I'm sorry," was all Elsa could say.

" **Don't worry about it, Elsie. It's not the first time Anna's commuting. She'll be fine.** **Now, I want you to take a rest. I will tell you if she's here, okay?** "

Elsa knew that Bulda was also worried despite the rather calm mask. She was the mother of Anna, and there was no way she wouldn't worry when her daughter was traveling on her own. Elsa knew that even if she begged Bulda to scold her, the woman wouldn't do it. She was always the lenient one between her and Elsa's mother.  _I'm going to get it from mama_ , she sighed inwardly.

"P-Please."

* * *

Five hours of traveling while crying were now taking its toll on Anna as she hugged her knees closer to her chest. Her eyes were rimmed red and felt heavy, she could use some sleep. It felt like she cried gallons. One simple secret and she couldn't even keep it. She was used to bailing and coming up with excuses, but why was it that she couldn't do it to Elsa?

" _Stupid_ ," Anna hissed, hating herself more and more as the minutes went by.

There was no turning back. What will happen to them now? She couldn't go back and act like nothing happened. She already failed when it came to hiding her feelings. Even if she didn't say those exact words, the things she said already led to the same direction. She was completely convinced that Elsa would've figured it out.

"I told Elsie you're here." Bulda sat beside her on the sofa. "She's worried."

Anna leaned her head on her knees, feeling even more miserable. How could she run away from sweet Elsa? More importantly, why would Elsa continuously call and message her? Because she was concerned? As a friend? Usually, Anna would beam with delight. But this time, it only hurt.

Friend.

Could Anna even be considered a friend? She hoped that Elsa never found someone she could fall in love with. She hoped that no such 'dream girl' existed for Elsa. She became possessive of Elsa. When she had her feelings sorted out and accepted (bitterly) the possibility of Elsa loving someone else, she just had to go and get cornered by the girl herself. Then, after getting cornered, she freaking confessed her jealousy and ran away. Honestly, was she really a friend?

"Are you going to tell me what happened, or am I going to wait until you cry again?"

There were many things that Anna wanted to get off her chest, but she didn't know where to begin. Where would she start? Should she tell her mother about that stupid deal? The rules that she and Elsa came up with? That was probably a trivial matter compared to the fact that she fell in love.

"I... I think I told her." Her mother stared at her, prodding her to continue. But that was it. That was her main problem anyway. She avoided confessing her feelings, but now it was out.

When Bulda realized Anna wouldn't say anything else, she spoke, "Okay. Uhm... so you  _think_ you told her. How does that work?"

"R-Remember that girl I told you about? The one who was in our apartment when you called? I-I was jealous, and then things became awkward between us. I kind of... told her about it."

Her mother gave her a look, and it made her feel even more embarrassed. She never talked about her love life to her mother. Not even her previous boyfriends. They knew about the guys, but they would simply tell Anna to focus on her studies first.

"And...?" Bulda prodded gently, urging the girl to continue. "What did she say? You were crying. I'm guessing... it didn't go well? How did she react?"

Anna couldn't look at her mother in the eyes, and because she didn't know what to say, she poked her fingers together like the shy girl she surprisingly became to be. Her thoughts were a whirlwind of a mess even when the entire stuff happened hours ago. She couldn't settle down.

"You ran away," Bulda deadpanned and Anna released an involuntary whimper. Her mother sighed. If Anna knew her well, that was a sigh of disappointment. "Anna,  _you_ ran away. Why are you the one crying?"

"I-It's... She said she likes the girl a-and... I don't want to interfere with them or anything."

"Are they going out? Gerda would have told me if Elsie was already with someone else. Actually, I'm confident that Elsie will tell me too."

" _I'm_ the one who's always with her, mom. I know what's going on in her life," Anna pointed out, mildly irritated that people kept pushing it. "A-And... she said that going out with me was weird."

"What?" Bulda blinked and it took Anna a few seconds to realize that she just said something she had no intention of telling her mom. "She said that? Elsie?"

Anna was panicking because of her own slip-up. Should she roll with it and leave the information about their deal out? Actually, why was she panicking? Those were Elsa's words and it wouldn't change no matter how many times she panicked and sulked over it.

"Yeah." Anna hugged her knees closer to her chest, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks again. She was lost in her inner storm that she was barely able to notice how her mother enveloped her in a warm hug, rubbing soothing circles on her back. It was comforting, but it wasn't the same as Elsa's loving arms.

 _I'll never experience that again_ , she thought.


	28. Comparison and Resemblance

Going home to a huge apartment with no one there to welcome her felt surreal. It had been a couple of days since Anna left, and it was only getting lonelier by the day. Now that she thought about it, Anna would always be there for her whenever she'd come home from university. Most of her classes were set during the night. That was their routine. She would be the one to see Anna off late in the morning, and Anna would be the one to welcome her home late at night.

Strange. Elsa was an only child but not once had she ever been lonely. Anna would always be there for her even if at times, she could get out of hand.  _I didn't know it would feel like this without her_. Many times, Elsa wondered what it would feel like without the girl. If Anna left her alone, maybe she could move on. That was the thought that ran inside her head back when she was desperate to keep her feelings hidden.

But now?

Now that she was able to cool down, she started wondering about everything in a more composed way. Somewhere deep in her heart, she  _knew_ Anna's feelings. She knew, but she was afraid to bring it up. Because she didn't know if Anna's feelings for her were real.

Maybe it was a force of habit. Years of seeing Anna fall in and out of love easily, and suddenly, her feelings were returned? Elsa wasn't sure how to take it. Perhaps, she really was selfish. But now that it was Anna who went so far as to speak up...

"We have to talk," Elsa admitted as she walked to Anna's room. She settled some books on top of the study table, reminding her of the fact that she wasn't off university duties yet. Unlike Anna whose exams were always project-based, Elsa had written exams of her own.

After pulling out a chair, she sat and had a long staring contest with her books.

Living in this cold spacious apartment by herself was lonely. Spending her time in Anna's room was her only source of warmth. It brought her solace. The girl's scent still lingered and the accessories in the room were just so... Anna.

Elsa groaned, leaning her forehead on the table. She couldn't get herself to concentrate on reviewing because everything was messed up. Anna wouldn't answer her calls or texts, and even Bulda would only tell her that she was fine. It wasn't enough. She wanted to talk, to clear things up, but Anna wouldn't let her. She couldn't go home either because she was busy with her exams coming right up.

_I want to see you..._

"Ngh," Elsa whined, lifting her head up and settling her chin on the table instead. For a moment, she frowned at a blank space on the wall. She sighed, and then her eyes snapped to the collection of sketchpads placed on the corner of the study table.

The slightly protruding piece of paper between two pads caught her attention.

Maybe it was because she disliked seeing things disorganized, or maybe she was genuinely curious, but she reached out to the paper and gently pulled it out. She settled it on top of the sketchpads instead and decided to focus on studying. She honestly tried to, but the paper was right there and...

Curiosity won.

Elsa usually wouldn't do something like this, but it wasn't always she could see a strange piece of paper either. If it was Anna, it would most likely be a sketch anyway, and it had been a long time since she'd last seen any of the girl's sketches. She reached out for the paper and started unfolding it, mentally preparing herself for whatever subject it was that Anna drew... or so she thought.

Operation: Girlfriend.

It was written neatly like it was a formal agreement. The cute little letters were definitely Anna's handwriting, but what surprised Elsa the most was that it was kept in the first place. It had been more than a couple of months since their deal, and to think that Anna kept the 'contract' all this time? These absurd rules she came up with and Elsa agreed to do, they were still intact.

Save for rule number five.

Rule number five... Elsa grunted and glared at the rule. It didn't shock her, no. How can it when she was the one who came up with it? It wasn't what troubled her. What bothered her was how the rule was... scribbled on. It was crossed out, drawn on, covered in pen, and even slightly torn.

"Anna..."

It was the only word she could say, mostly because she hadn't expected Anna to take it seriously. The girl didn't care about rules, and her crossing the rule out as if she was so angry to a point it tore the paper broke Elsa's heart. It only meant that Anna was serious and that she  _tried_ to stop herself from crossing the line. If only Elsa was more honest with herself and to Anna, maybe none of this would have had happened.

Elsa swallowed the huge lump in the back of her throat and focused on the paper again. At first, she thought that Anna wrote some additional rules that she didn't know about, but what she saw next gave way to the new questions inside her head for the nth time since Anna left.

"Kristoff. Blonde, sweet, gentle," Elsa read softly.

A slight throb in her chest occurred upon reading the name of Anna's very first boyfriend, along with those descriptions. There were other names coming right after his - all of which were names of Anna's exes, each having descriptions of their own. Elsa quickly scanned through until her eyes stopped at the very last name.

_Hans._

Elsa lowered the paper on the desk. She stared a little absently at the scribbled messages and crossed out information beneath the guy's name. His was the only one with no readable description, and it made Elsa curious. Very curious.

What were these notes supposed to mean? Why did Anna write down all of her exes? Why were there descriptions all over the paper? Why was Hans' name the only one unreadable? Was there a problem with him, after all?

Elsa swallowed.

The guy admitted himself that he still had feelings for Anna. He also knew that Anna felt the same for her, too. He was obviously still smitten, so why would he push the girl he was in love with to someone else? Why did he provoke Elsa with those blunt responses? Why would he bother getting her and Anna together?

" **Glad you finally called.** " The voice on the other end was highly amused. Never in Elsa's life had she ever thought that she would someday end up calling him, but there she was. " **I was just about to die from the pressure and suspense.** "

* * *

Elsa fought the urge to leave the place. She had to keep reminding herself that this wouldn't be the first time she'd be spending some time alone with him, but her hands still trembled with uncertainty. There were many things that could happen in this little rendezvous.  _Just ask him why then walk away_ , she said to herself.

"Hey." Elsa nearly jumped out of her skin upon hearing Hans' voice. "You're here early. Weren't we supposed to meet in a few more minutes?"

"I could say the same for you."

"I don't like making people wait. Guess you're the same, huh?" Hans chuckled, bringing a light smile to Elsa's lips. "Mind if I take a seat?" He pointed to the chair across her, and she merely gestured as a silent permission.

Hans placed his drink on top of the table and sat with surprisingly relaxed yet poised demeanor. Elsa took that time to observe him. Hans was, without a doubt, the closest definition of a 'Prince Charming'. He was good-looking, confident but also relaxed, and he looked like a guy who couldn't harm someone but could still look intimidating. Despite the way his sideburns looked a little odd, it worked well with his facial features.

"I'm guessing this is about Anna," Hans stated.

Elsa's eyes lowered to her drink and her hands trembled despite them being balled into fists. This was the first time they were left alone after that day Anna first went to his apartment. Back then, they had a harsh conversation which made this more awkward.

"What do you want to know?" Hans offered. "There's no need to be sympathetic."

Elsa frowned. "So you really did know," she accused, but the lopsided smile on Hans' lips didn't waver. "Why were you... helping us out?"

Judging by his expression, Elsa could safely say that it wasn't what he was expecting. However, like the usual Hans she had heard from Anna, he was quickly able to recover and grin again. "Why do you want to know?"

"I find it weird," Elsa admitted. "It strikes me as odd. You were the one who told me that if you want to get her back, you're going to do everything you can for it to happen."

"That's true," Hans hummed, and then he shrugged. "Let's just say I probably have the same reasons you had when you let her go out with me."

"I think our reasons differ, Hans. Even without the fact that she's my best friend, I'm also a girl. Anna had always been going out with guys, and she never had any interest in girls."

"Yeah, I know," Hans assured. "What did you expect? Of course she wouldn't show any interest in other girls. Not when she's only interested in  _one_ girl."

"That's not what I'm saying. I'm talking about the past, not now." Elsa tried to ignore the growing blush on her face upon realizing that she was that 'one' girl. "I'm being serious here, Hans."

Hans' finger tapped absently on the tabletop, a smug look on his face. Despite Elsa shooting the same glare at him as the one she shot to Rapunzel in the bar, he never broke eye contact. After a few seconds, he took a deep breath and leaned closer to the table, settling his arms on top of it.

"So am I," Hans said. "I don't think you'll understand because you weren't the one in my position, but let me tell you something. You weren't the one who had to put up with Anna's rambling about  _you_."

Elsa's fingers twitched on top of her lap. He didn't look angry. He didn't even sound accusing either. If anything, it was almost as if he was simply informing her about it. How was she supposed to react?

"You know..." Hans began after a moment of silence. "One day, she sent me a message asking how to grill a chicken. It came as a surprise, and a slight bit of jealousy. She never cooked for me before. She always told me she didn't know how."

"She asked... you?"

"I told her to just search some recipe online, but she said that there was no point in doing it if I can just give her an answer." Hans snorted and took a sip of his frappucino. "Was it good?"

"W-What?"

"That grilled chicken. Was it good?" Hans asked again, his eyes downcast and finding his drink amusing.

"She didn't cook any," Elsa answered, voice unsure.

"Oh?" Hans lifted his gaze to her again, an eyebrow raised. "She said she wanted to learn how to do it because it was your favorite. She was even excited since it turned out perfect for her."

"W-When did she...?" Elsa was unable to finish the question. She couldn't remember eating a grilled chicken. It was her favorite, and if Anna was the one who made it, surely she would remember?

"About two weeks ago," Hans answered.

Elsa's memories came flooding in, a sense of guilt and horror along with it. Two weeks ago was when she asked Belle for assistance with something she was doing for Anna. If she cooked it that night, then...  _no way_. That was the only night that Elsa went home late, and it was also the night that this distance between them started growing.

"Maybe she ate it all. It's possible if it's her. If it was really delicious like she said, maybe she ate all of it," Hans chuckled.

But Elsa couldn't believe his words. She had seen how devastated Anna was the first time she tried cooking. If Hans was telling the truth, that meant that Anna was successful in one attempt at cooking. And Elsa's favorite too.  _But she said it ended up... burned. Oh god_. The more she thought about it, the more she felt like going after Anna and leaving her exams incomplete, failing along the way.

"But why would you help her?" Elsa tried to search Hans' face for an answer. "You still like her, right? Why were you pushing her to me? You had all those chances, so... why?"

Elsa shouldn't complain that someone was helping her and Anna get together. She should be thankful instead, but at the same time, she could feel a strange connection with the guy, and it drove her to ask these things. What was it, though?

"It hurts, but it's what she wants," Hans answered, his eyes lowering to his drink. "I do love her still, but I know when I already lost. I guess I just... needed my own closure."

"W-What happened to doing something to get what you want?" Elsa stuttered, heart clenching at the way she could relate to his words.  _He's just like me_ , she thought.

"I want Anna to be happy," Hans promised. "And she  _is_  with you, Elsa. She smiles and laughs genuinely when she's with you. I've never seen that kind of expression on her back when we were together. I doubt she even loved me then."

"You knew?" Elsa curled her fingers on top of her lap. "And yet, you asked her to sleep with you? You knew she didn't love you, but you still asked her to sleep with you?"

"I didn't 'ask' her," Hans corrected. "I told her to sleep with me if she wasn't in love with you."

Elsa blinked. The smile on the guy's lips was similar to the smile he wore when they were running around looking for Anna. The glint of hurt in his eyes then and the one he had the moment he entered the café became more prominent, but alongside it was a great hint of... relief.

"Anna's really dense. I'm not surprised she didn't notice her own feelings until another girl stepped into the picture." Hans leaned back in his chair. "Sometimes, even when the people around her already see everything, she still doesn't believe it. I just tried to make her understand it by force. Though, she only ended up calling me a maniac and punching me in the gut because of it."

"W-What are you saying?"

"When we were still together, she smiles and laughs, but it's never the same as how she did when she introduced you to me or when talking about you." Hans was absently tapping his finger on top of the table. "I told you, Elsa. You're not the one who has to put up with her rambling about you. You're not the one always being compared to her 'perfect best friend'."

The moment those words were spoken, Elsa's world stood still. She wasn't able to understand it immediately. Maybe because she was surprised, but she could manage if only a bit slower than usual. To drop such an information nonchalantly? It was almost scary and unnerving, but there he was, saying these things even if it was obviously hurting him too.

"B-But that means..."

"You're smart, right? I'm sure you get it." Hans said, a dejected smile on his lips. "Anna only went out with me because I'm smart and responsible.  _Like you_."


	29. Follow You Home

Anna didn't know if she wanted to laugh or feel nervous at the way Olaf's eyes were closed as he took the first bite of spaghetti. She waited in slight anticipation because it was  _her_ who made it. With a little help from their mother, of course. Just a little. And Olaf didn't know. If he did, he'd surely refuse to eat it. That was why this very first bite was crucial and important. It was one thing that her mother said it tasted alright, but this was Olaf's birthday, and Anna wanted to please her little brother since she rarely came home.

"Sweeeeeeeet! Mommy, this is yummy!" Olaf raised his fork, barely able to contain his glee. It took Anna a few seconds to fully register what he said, but once it did, she released the breath she was hyperaware she was holding.

Anna nibbled on her lip to stop herself from grinning widely as she looked at her mother who was laughing and shaking her head while giving her a look that clearly said 'I told you'. Anna ignored the look and gazed at her brother again, enjoying the way he continuously ate the spaghetti.

Ever since she went home, Anna had been spending more time with Bulda. It wasn't as if they weren't close before, but she preferred to play with Olaf and Elsa. However, this time, she felt some sort of renewed connection with her mother. Maybe it was because she already threaded on thin ice and practically told her mother her secret and problems. A mother's support was definitely different. It felt nice in its own way.

"It would've been nice if Elsie could come." Bulda had a sympathetic smile on her face - a look that made Anna feel terrible.

More than a week passed and Anna still hadn't contacted Elsa. In the end, she didn't get a chance to invite her to Olaf's birthday. She knew that she herself was being distant. She didn't reply to any of Elsa's messages, and they had stopped coming during the fifth day - which was around four days ago.  _I can't blame her_ , she sighed inwardly. Like Bulda said, she was the one who ran away.

"Maybe you should get dressed. It's almost time." Bulda placed her hand on Anna's shoulder in an attempt to cheer her up. "Don't worry about it too much, Anna. Things will get better."

"I'll go get dressed." Anna patted her mother's hand in silent thanks.

Of course, things would get better. They  _had_  to. First, she has to apologize once they see each other. Next, she has to do something about her feelings or, at least, try to learn how to act in front of Elsa. That would be a tedious task. Probably even futile. How could someone move on from their best friend? By not being best friends anymore? The thought made Anna's stomach turn. She didn't want to lose  _that_  too. It was the only connection she had left of Elsa. Even if it was damaged for now, she would do anything to mend it. To do that, she had to be fair.

She has to let go of her less than friendly feelings.

 _I wish moving on from you could be just as easy as moving on from Hans or the others_ , Anna bitterly thought. She knew it was only a false 'love'. Maybe that was the very reason why she was able to move on overnight. This thing with Elsa, it was the real deal. It was the first time she was so broken that she couldn't even get herself to drink. That, and Bulda wouldn't allow her. Besides, even though she could be reckless and irresponsible, she didn't want to be a bad influence on Olaf. The boy would always follow her example, and she wouldn't take chances.

"Anna!" Olaf ran towards his older sister who was walking down the stairs. "Daddy gave me another book!" He pouted, shoving the encyclopedia to Anna.

"Well, that's..." Anna trailed off, fighting hard not to laugh.

"I really want a robot!"

"I'm really sorry, Olaf." Anna smiled apologetically, ruffling his hair. "I promise I'm not going to forget them next time. I'll even add one more as an apology."

"Promise?" Olaf asked, face as stern as can be.

"I promise," Anna repeated, deciding to buy one more toy for him as an addition to the last two she bought during that sale.  _Serves me right for going home on impulse_ , she sighed inwardly.

"Anna, do me a favor and help us make him read those," Cliff, their father, said as he continuously placed balloons around the place.

"Dad, you can't even make  _me_  read those." Anna rolled her eyes. "Besides, robots are cool, and anime is cooler. Right?" She winked at Olaf enthusiastically agreed, much to their father's chagrin.

"Oh, but if Elsie's coming, she can bring the robots, right?" Olaf noted.

The very mention of Elsa's nickname made Anna's heart skip a beat. She tried her best to keep smiling because the last thing she ever wanted was to cry in front of her little brother. She has an image to uphold in front of him. Those little shoulders of his won't be able to handle seeing his older sister by twelve years cry in front of him. That was why even when it hurts, she smiled and ruffled his hair again.

"Maybe she will," Anna tried, voice shaking. "But if she does, it's probably going to be a late gift. She's still in school, Olaf."

"Oh," Olaf pouted, head lowering.

Anna pressed her lips tight and silently cursed herself. She didn't want to spoil Olaf too much, but at the same time, she also wanted to. She was rarely home and his robots were the only thing she could give him as a way to compensate for her long weeks and months away from him.

"Olaf!" The siblings looked at their front doors to see their very first visitors. Olaf squealed with glee as he quickly ran towards his friends, leaving Anna alone without even saying goodbye.  _Kids_ , she mused with a roll of her eyes.

A few minutes later and people came in flocks. Anna had to wonder if Bulda and Cliff invited the entire subdivision. She could see a lot of her mother's and father's colleagues - some with children and some alone. It was noisy and a little annoying with all the shouts, yells, and laughs of children, but Anna admitted that this could work as a distraction. It could help her forget about Elsa for a bit.

Or so she thought.

"Mama! Papa!" Olaf tackled a couple as old as their parents in a hug as huge as his tiny arms would allow him.

There they were, in all their glorious almost ethereal-like visages. A woman with ash blonde hair and bright green eyes, and a man with reddish-brown hair and strikingly blue eyes. They returned Olaf's greeting with equal fervor, carrying and spinning him around. Contrary to how happy and at home they looked like, Anna felt like the world was crushing on her shoulders.  _Of course they'd be here_ , she mentally berated herself for thinking otherwise. It was already an unspoken rule and she should know that by now.

When the old couple's eyes landed on her, Anna began sweating. There wasn't any hint of antagonistic vibe from them, but pure happiness and joy. The woman walked in smooth and gentle strides towards her, and the closer she get, the more Anna felt guilty.

"Anna," acknowledged the woman. Anna fought the urge to ball her hand into a fist, forcing herself to stand straight and not avoid her gaze.

"Mama." Anna smiled softly and the lady enveloped her in a hug that almost made her cry right then and there. It wasn't the same, but it was comfortable because this woman wore the same scent as Elsa.

"How are you?" Gerda asked, genuinely concerned.

 _This is so unfair_. This woman was basically her second mother. Maybe she could break out some excuse to her  _own_ mother, but she couldn't lie to another adult. Especially not to Elsa's parents. Fooling around was one thing, but lying was another. This was so unfair.

"I'm okay," Anna said with a voice barely above a whisper. With the closeness they have, Gerda was bound to hear it anyway. "I'm sorry, Mama."

"What for?" Gerda pulled back and looked at her curiously. "There's nothing wrong with wanting to spend more time with your family."

Anna couldn't understand if she wanted to be thankful or pained at the way Gerda smiled at her. It was an understanding smile, obviously trying to make things easier.  _She knows_. And though Anna was guilty, she knew that Gerda wasn't angry. If anything, she was probably just sad. Seriously, what was one supposed to say to the mother of her best friend that she grew to fall in love with?

Gerda patted her cheek twice, and she could only smile. If she didn't know what to say, best to just shut up. She had enough of blurting things out to Elsa; she didn't need to blurt something out in front of Gerda too.

"It's nice to see you again, Anna," Kai, Gerda's husband, said with a huge toothy grin.

"Likewise," Anna responded politely.

"Mama, Papa, where's Elsie?" Olaf was tugging on Kai's shirt.

"Well, Olaf." Kai knelt down in front of him and held his hand. "Elsie... She needed to submit something in school, but she promised to come home as soon as she can."

"How soon?" Olaf tilted his head to the side.

Kai and Gerda shared a worried glance. Even Anna darted her eyes among the three. She and the couple knew that Elsa wouldn't be free until the coming week, and it was hard to explain to Olaf when he had always been close to her. She was the cool older sister, while Anna was laid back... which was fine because, in all honesty, Olaf wouldn't take her seriously if she ever got strict. To him, she was his partner in crime, much to their parents' dismay.

"Anna!" Bulda gestured for her to come closer. Anna sent an apologetic smile to Gerda and Kai before running towards her mother. "Be a dear and give these to the children on the front porch, will you?" Bulda offered a tray of frozen hot chocolates to her.

"Hey, how come I don't have any?!" Anna whined as she practically drooled because of the delicious looking beverages.

"There's a lot where that came from. Now, go. Chop-chop!" Bulda gently pushed her.

"Mom!" Anna yelped and tried the balance the glasses on top of the tray. " _Geez_. After all these years, I'd think you know me by now," she huffed and Bulda just laughed and shooed her away.

Anna snorted and shook her head fondly.  _Moms_.

Sighing, Anna walked carefully towards the front porch while yelling excuses to everyone who'd stand in her way.  _I better ask mom how to make this_ , she mentally noted as she stopped herself from drinking the drinks out right. The closer she was to the front doors, the louder the yelling and laughing of innocent voices filled her ears.

The children were playing around with the balloons and toys that Anna and Bulda prepared beforehand. Normally, clowns would have been a necessity when it came to children's parties, but because Olaf has a terrible fear of them, the entire family went against the idea. However, this particular display of innocence in front of her reminded her of something quite soothing but also equally frightening.

These kids reminded her of when she had her own party as a child. How Elsa would always stick around with her. No matter how much dirt or troubles they find themselves into, Elsa would always be there. They would laugh at the littlest things, pop balloons with their butts, and spread icing on each other's cheeks.

_I miss you._

"Anna!" cheered one little girl who ran towards her. Anna took it as a sign for her to lower herself so the girl could see their drinks. "Oh wow! Chocolate!"

Soon, the children surrounded Anna and took one of their own. She had to wonder how all those glasses fit on one tray but decided not to think too much about it. Mothers always had a way of fitting things even when they were nearly impossible. Heck, they could find things that magically disappeared to somewhere!

"Take only one. If you want more, ask your parents if you can have some," Anna said with a slightly stern voice. She almost laughed when the kids looked at her in total confusion. "Or just come find me and I'll see what I can do," she whispered conspiratorially and winked, effectively making them all beam in utter delight.

"You're the best!" A boy raised his thumb.

"I know." Anna giggled and stood up, taking the time to look at the children taking a sip of their chocolate drinks. "Don't go anywhere outside, okay? I have eyes everywhere." She pointed at her eyes then to the kids, eliciting an adorable laughter from them.

There were adults by the front lawn, plus, their subdivision wasn't a dangerous place. Still. If they were dealing with children, Anna felt the need to warn them too.  _I'm not one to talk, though, since I always ran away._ Anna's lips curled upwards. Good times. It sure was easier back when she was a child where the only problem she ever had to deal with was to run away from her mother's cooking, laundry, and lessons about being a proper lady.

Anna scratched the side of her cheek for no real reason. After a few more seconds of simply looking at the kids enjoying their time, slightly confused as to what was holding Olaf inside the house, Anna shrugged and turned around to leave the porch, her eyes still planted to the kids. Granted, it wasn't the best of ideas.

"OOF!"

"Wha—!" Anna flailed her arms wildly, trying her best to balance. When she realized she was failing, she braced her rear for receiving a huge impact that was now inevitable.

But it never came.

It took a moment for Anna to fully understand what happened. Her eyes adjusted to see that she was slightly slanted, the children staring at her in awe. Her butt was still safe and instead of some forceful impact on her rear, she only felt a soft but firm touch on her wrist. She blinked a few times before looking at the good soul who had saved her from embarrassing herself so much... only to wish she really did embarrass herself that way.

"Glad I caught you."

Anna's jaw dropped, unable to understand what was going on. A gorgeous woman stood before her, helping her balance herself and stopping her from the impending doom of falling on her ass. Oceanic pools never once avoiding her turquoises. It was beautiful and lovely, and she was almost certain she was dreaming. This couldn't be real.

"E-Elsa?"

Anna would continuously blink, and Elsa could tell she was having a hard time believing her existence. She didn't know that Elsa  _could_ manage to come home earlier than her original break. Actually, even Elsa wasn't sure how she was able to pull off some kind of crazy excuses like going abroad due to an emergency. Well, she didn't go to another country, but she still needed the time to travel much. In the end, her professors allowed her to take the written exams earlier because of said 'emergency'.

Still.

For the first time in almost two weeks, Elsa's heart beat louder and faster than ever. Being deprived of Anna's touches made her feel incomplete. It was almost funny how just holding the girl's wrist sent a wave of sweet, sweet shock to her entire being.

"Are you okay?" Elsa smiled and pulled her up, heart fluttering when Anna's body lightly touched hers. She tried her best not to look disappointed when the redhead stepped back a little.

Elsa knew that she had to take things slow. Her appearance probably hasn't sunk in yet and she knew that Anna doesn't deal well with an information overload. So she stood there, smiling as the redhead tried to process what was going on. Her smile came naturally. She was genuinely happy to see Anna again, and she was determined to talk. She would run across the country or swim across the ocean or maybe even climb every mountain just so they could talk.

Unfortunately, Anna doesn't think the same way.

When Elsa noticed a subtle movement, she knew what was about to come. That was why when Anna ran away, she was able to run after her. She was barely able to notice how the children watched them in wonder, but she could care less. For now, she had to talk to Anna.

"Oww!" Elsa groaned and knelt on one knee, rubbing her poor foot. Out of desperation to avoid her, Anna slammed the front door, but because Elsa was near, she used her foot to stop it from shutting completely.  _Wow, she really wants to avoid me, huh?_ Elsa suppressed an exasperated sigh.

"S-Sorry," Anna squeaked.

Elsa pressed her lips, trying to stop a face-splitting grin despite the throb of her foot. Regardless of the way Anna would still try to avoid her, she was still worried. Maybe if Elsa didn't know what bothered Anna, she would've been frank and chide the girl for completely ignoring her.

After her rather strange conversation with Hans, Elsa tried to piece the string of events together. She had speculations, but she needed reassurance. That confirmation from Hans was enough to create a raging inferno of hope from within her, but she didn't allow herself to be completely happy. It was true, she had a hunch and Hans confirmed it for her, but she needed to hear it from Anna. In Anna's voice and own words.

"Elsie!" A cheerful boy greeted and tackled her. "You're here!"

Elsa giggled and swayed the boy slowly in response to his rather enthusiastic greeting. "I can't miss your birthday, Olaf. Sorry for coming in late. I had to figure some things out."

"It's okay! You're here now! I'm happy! Anna's happy! Elsie's happy! Everybody happy!" Olaf stretched out his arms excitedly. "Anna, Anna! Elsie is... Anna, your face is red!"

"I-It's not!" Anna stuttered.

"It is! You can't get sick! We still have a lot of things to do! You promised!"

"Olaf, I'm not sick." Anna covered her eyes and Elsa watched as her ears slowly turned red. "A-Anyway! I'm going to return this tray," she lamely excused herself.

Olaf was left confused by her sister's red face and gave Elsa a worried glance. Elsa smiled to assure the little boy who beamed and hugged her again, causing her to laugh and return the gesture while seeing how hers and Anna's parents were now walking towards them.

"You should've told me you were near!" Kai frowned.

"Papa, I was driving," Elsa gently answered, trying not to shuffle in front of Bulda's scrutinizing gaze.

Elsa's fingers were ice cold. Strange that it only happened now that their parents were in front of her, that Bulda was in front of her. There wasn't any hint of hostility in the lady's smile, but she still felt anxious. Bulda was the one who knew what went on with Anna for the last few days. It wasn't what scared her, but something that Bulda mentioned.

 **From:** Mommy  
 **To:** Elsa  
Anna said you told her that dating each other is weird.

After reading that text, Elsa decided stop messaging Anna, afraid that she would explain right then and there. She wanted to clear things up and be completely honest while Anna was in front of her. She knew she would probably end up stuttering, maybe she would even cry, but if she was going to be open and completely blunt about her own feelings, she wanted Anna to be there.

"Olaf, go play with your friends. Elsie needs to eat." Cliff beckoned his head to the side for emphasis.

"Okay! Elsie, we're going to play later, okay?! I wanna play with you and Anna again!"

"Oh, right." Elsa smiled and reached into her bag, pulling out two perfectly gift-wrapped boxes. "Happy birthday, Olaf." She offered the boxes to him.

"Oh. Oh!" Olaf quickly grabbed them. "These are the robots, right?! Anna said she forgot them!" Even though it sounded like he was whining, his grin told Elsa otherwise. "Thank you, thank you, thank you sooooo much, Elsie!" He gave Elsa another hug.

"You're very welcome," Elsa promised, and she smiled when Olaf let go of her. "Now, why don't you go play with your friends? You can show them those if you want."

"I will!" Olaf exclaimed with a huge toothy grin. "They're going to be so jealous! You and Anna always pick the best robots! I'll see you later, Elsie!"

Silence settled among them as Olaf left. It wasn't surprising either. Elsa knew it was bound to happen once she went home. They all knew what happened. She had told her mother and father, and judging by what Bulda told her a few days ago, Anna also told her. It wouldn't be a stretch if she told Cliff too. She also knew what questions were running inside their heads, but she couldn't give an answer when things weren't clear for her and Anna either.

"Okay, how about you eat for now? I'm sure you're tired!" Bulda suggested.

"M-Mommy, daddy, I—"

"It's alright, Elsie," Bulda stopped her before she could apologize. "You don't have to tell us anything.  _For now_. But I'm seriously going to ask questions after you've made up."

"And here I thought you were finally giving them some privacy," Cliff sighed, causing Elsa's parents to laugh.

"I can't blame her though. Even  _I_ am worried and curious about the details." Gerda smirked and Elsa's face heated up. Because of the embarrassment, she had to cover her eyes with one hand, trying her best to push back the heat that was already visible, she could barely hide it.

* * *

Anna tried to come up with any sort of explanation for Elsa's random appearance. She kept telling herself that this was a dream, but the sight of a beautiful goddess by the sofa was way too real to be an illusion. That pale shade of blonde, flawless skin, and icy blue eyes? Even that familiar white snap-trimmed capris, blue ribbon-tie shirt, and knitted cardigan? The way she sat and ate? That woman was, without a doubt, Elsa.

Anna quickly snapped her eyes away the moment she saw Elsa's head moved.  _Ohgod. She didn't see, right?! Please tell me she didn't see! You're still fine, Anna! No one saw! You're still good!_ She tried to convince herself with those words, but deep down, there was a part of her that knew just the exact opposite. Maybe the other people didn't notice how she was staring, but there was a high chance that Elsa did.

And she was right.

The evasive response and hair flipping was obvious for Elsa not to notice. Anna should've worn a bun instead of her usual braids so it would've been more believable. Elsa couldn't resist a dopey grin because Anna was totally checking her out.  _Wow, that sounds strange._ Anna checking her out? That was an odd but not the least bit unwelcome thought. Although it made her extremely nervous herself, it was slightly pleasant in all sorts of ways. To see Anna blushing because of her was... comforting.

Elsa twirled the spaghetti on her fork and took a bite, cocking her head after tasting it. She took another bite of the reddish pasta on her plate just to make sure and, sure enough, it tasted sweeter than what she remembered.

"Mommy, did you change your ingredients?" Elsa wondered.

"No, no. Anna was the one who made that," Bulda informed. "She's been interested in cooking lately. After years of forcing her into it, she  _finally_ had the drive. I guess I should thank you for that."

"T-That's... I didn't ask her to."

"True, but she wanted to help you out, right?"

Elsa tightened her hold on the plate and sent a tight smile to the lady. Bulda seemed satisfied with that alone, and so she looked at Anna again. The redhead was playing with the other children, scolding them from time to time whenever some would break out into little fights about the game. Though Anna was still acting quite cheerful when she does it, she had a strange way of making the children listen to her.

After a few minutes, Anna walked to their backyard, along with the other children. For a moment, Elsa was disappointed, but then she remembered they were still in the same house and that the day wasn't over yet. Besides, her stomach kept growling since she hadn't eaten anything since that morning. She was much too excited and nervous about going home that she forgot about her meal. This time though, when she was finally on the place, her stomach tied itself in a knot.

Can Elsa do this? She wanted to tell Anna everything on her side. It wasn't only because Anna voiced out her thoughts, but because she really wanted to. She had been a coward for years already and she knew she had to step up lest she loses Anna to someone else again. Not when she knew their feelings were already mutual.

"She's not going to run away," Bulda promised, sensing Elsa's reluctance. "She's crazy, but not  _that_ crazy. She won't leave when it's still Olaf's birthday, and we won't let her."

Bulda's eyes held a decisiveness that sent bolts and chills down Elsa's spine. It wasn't only Anna who was stuck in the situation, but her as well. Maybe it was fine. Like this, both of them would be forced to talk it out like that time when they had a week-long fight. The fight that led her to notice her own feelings. No, it wasn't their parents who forced them to talk. They were just the ones who  _threw_ them into a situation where they would be forced to.

"Thank you," Elsa said and Bulda's shocked expression wasn't lost on her. She didn't bother explaining what she was thankful for. Instead, she stood and walked towards the nearest trash bag and discarded her now-empty plate.


	30. I Love You

Before her wits left again, Elsa stiffly went to the backyard, ignoring the way people stared at her. But after seeing Anna sitting on the steps, her wits left her anyway. Elsa was the very definition of uncertainty then. The idea that Anna  _could_ reject her made her terrified of admitting everything. Just because they felt the same way didn't mean they'd end up together.

However, before she could run and shy away, Anna decided to turn her head and meet her gaze, surprised. She looked like a lost puppy and it was enough to make the blonde panic inwardly.  _Come on, Elsa, talk! Talk! She's just right there!_ Elsa forcefully swallowed the lump in her throat and shakily smiled.

"Hi," Elsa said softly, delighting at the way Anna's cheeks flushed. She tried not to frown when the redhead snapped her head in front and hugged her knees closer to her chest. The silent treatment was almost deadly and unnerving, but Elsa noted one thing: Anna didn't run.

The sight of her just sitting there on top of the steps while blushing profusely made Elsa's heart swell. Even though Anna's eyes were settled on the children running around, they looked far more distant, and something told Elsa that she wasn't really focusing on the kids.

"H-Hi," Anna stuttered.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

"You don't have to ask."

The response elicited a blush on both their cheeks. "Right." Elsa awkwardly settled herself beside Anna close enough to feel her presence, but far enough so their skin wouldn't touch.

They sat in silence, both aware of the tension as they watched the children play. Usually, they wouldn't mind the silence between them, but that was back when they were just friends. This time, it was much more fragile and Elsa has to tread carefully. One wrong sentence and everything could get messed up. She has to make Anna comfortable with her, but how?

"Why are you here?" Anna wondered. "Your break starts next week."

"It's Olaf's birthday," Elsa pointed out. "Actually, I... I really wanted to see you, so I asked my professors if I can take my exams earlier."

"Oh." Anna breathed, almost out of impulse. "Sorry."

"It's okay. I was able to make it today anyway." Elsa stopped before she could end up saying something that could make Anna feel more uncomfortable. Not that her next words wouldn't. "A-About what you said that day," she tried instead but stopped when Anna stood up.

"Yeah, can we just forget about that?" The words were like a lance to Elsa's heart, but she tried her best to look past that. Her eyes slid down Anna's arms until they reached her hand and saw how her fingers trembled lightly despite being balled into fists. "I said something weird and went out of line," Anna snorted and finally looked at the blonde.

Elsa tapped her index finger on top of the steps while looking at Anna's turquoise eyes. She was hurt, but she made careful precautions not to show it. If there was someone hurting more between the two of them, it was Anna. That was why she sat there, waiting until Anna could finish her attempts to make her forget everything.

It failed miserably.

Anna's heart clenched impossibly tight at the way Elsa sat there, looking at her. She wasn't saying anything, but Anna knew that look in her eyes. Something that was crystal clear, it was scary. She had to look away, only proving the look in Elsa's eyes.

"I can't," Elsa answered truthfully. "You ran away from me and left me alone in our apartment. I can't just forget that."

"That's..." Anna paused. What  _could_  she say? Even if she tried to wiggle her way out of this with some sort of pitiable excuse, Elsa would know. She could read her well. Too well. And if Anna didn't have these feelings, maybe it would be fine, but she does and it made all this scarier.

Elsa stood up and held Anna's trembling hand (still balled into a fist) which effectively stiffened under her touch. Anna couldn't look at her because she was afraid that if she did, Elsa could understand immediately what was running inside her head.

"Anna." Elsa squeezed her hand. "Don't run away from me. I... I want us to talk about it."

Anna swallowed. She let her eyes take in the view of Elsa's hand touching hers, marveling at the wonderful contrast of their skins. Both of their hands trembled, and it dawned on her that in this situation, it wasn't only her who was afraid. Elsa would be too.  _I'm her best friend and I just practically told her I'm jealous of Belle_ , she sighed inwardly. She knew that she messed up. She really did. This would really change them, wouldn't it? Could they still be the same as before?

Because of the gloomy thoughts that ran inside her head, Anna didn't notice her own hand loosening its grip. Elsa took the opportunity to hold her hand correctly, fingers and all. She didn't like the look in Anna's eyes and she had to be gentle about this entire thing. She took a deep breath and gently pulled Anna away from there, hyperaware of how the redhead yelped in surprise.

"E-Elsa? W-Where are we going?" Anna asked nervously, hand still shaking from sheer nervousness. Her thoughts were a whirlwind of a mess and she had no idea where Elsa would take her. Every fiber of her being told her to pull away. To run before they reached their destination.

 _I don't want us to end_. It was the only thought that was consistent in Anna's head then. The memories and promises they made as children, the good times and the tears they both shed, even the way they go home in the same apartment every day... Anna didn't want it to end. Maybe she was being selfish and ridiculous because it was her who ran away, but she didn't want to lose that connection with Elsa. It was the  _only_ connection she had left, and she didn't want to lose it.

"Listen," Elsa said as soon as they stopped walking. "I... I know it's awkward or maybe uncomfortable to talk about it. But, Anna, we can't just ignore it either. I'm not dense."

"I... I know." Anna raised her free hand to cover her face that was tilted downwards in an attempt to hide. "Why did you think I ran away?"

In a span of more than a week, a pebble was lifted off her shoulders. With the help of her family, Anna was able to smile again. Though it wasn't a huge grin like she would always wear, it was still a genuine smile. But now, in the face of Elsa standing before her, asking her to be honest, she found herself unable to hold back the tears. She couldn't lie, she couldn't hide, and she couldn't run away because no matter what, Elsa would find her. She always did.

"L-Look, Elsa, I—!" Anna was stopped by a gentle finger in front of her lips. Her eyes met Elsa's again, now noticing how the blonde's face was slightly red too.

"No excuses, Anna."

They had a long staring contest, arguing with their eyes. Anna wanted to run away, but Elsa's grip prevented her from doing so.  _If I run, I will definitely lose her_. The gloomy thought made Anna lower her eyes.

"Hey," Elsa cooed, removing her finger in front of Anna's lips and cupped her cheek instead. "Anna, I promise I won't avoid you for this. I just want to know."

Anna's little whimper almost melted Elsa's resolve. This was hard on her, and Elsa knew that. She knew and she would say some words of comfort, but at that moment, she needed her own reassurance from Anna herself.  _I'm sorry_ , she apologized inside her head. When she felt Anna nod, a warm fluttery feeling bubbled up inside her chest.

Anna was blushing and looked incredibly fragile in front of Elsa. If she didn't do something about it fast, things would get harder for both of them.  _Come on, Elsa, this is no time to hesitate!_ After taking in a few more deep breaths, she let go of Anna's cheek and held the redhead's other hand as gentle as she could.

"Since... since when?" Elsa felt Anna's hands stiffen and move, trying to pull away from her touch but failed miserably. "Anna," she warned.

"Not fair," Anna whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut.

A part of Elsa found the entire action adorable, but she knew that it wasn't the time for that.  _This is harder than I thought_ , she sighed inwardly. Not making Anna admit, but preventing herself from just sweeping the shorter girl off her feet. The last thing she would want at that moment was to kiss Anna senseless without her consent, but if the girl kept acting this shy around her, she couldn't tell just how long she could last.

"I... I don't know," Anna choked in between shaky breaths. "B-But I only noticed when... when Belle came in the picture," she admitted, voice fading by the end as though she was shy to say it out loud.

"You mean, the first time you've met? Or when... when she came over?"

"I..." Anna paused. "I'm not sure. T-There were times when... when I thought that..."

"Go on," Elsa said, squeezing her hands again.

"I-I hoped that... you won't find someone you can like." Anna's voice was soft that if it wasn't for the tranquil silence surrounding them, Elsa would've missed it. "At... at first, I thought I was only being a possessive friend. I tried to reason with myself, that I shouldn't think like that because... because you're my best friend and I should be supportive."

"How do you know it's not?" That was a part that bothered Elsa the most. That, and what if Anna was only confused because of their fake dating relationship? What if it was all in Anna's head?

Elsa watched as Anna closed her eyes, fighting the urge to wipe away the tears that rolled down the girl's cheeks. Anna's eyebrows were knitted together and Elsa could tell that she was trying to fight back the sobs and whimpers.

"Because it hurt," Anna sobbed. Tears began to fall much more violently than before, and when Elsa loosened her grip, Anna gladly took her hands back and wiped them away. "When we started this, it started hurting so much. Even if we're together, it was only fake and it hurt a lot because I know... I  _know_ I'm not worthy of you. I was already lucky enough to have you as a friend. I'm going to be selfish if I asked for something more."

Elsa fought back her own tears. These words, no matter how painful they were to listen to, she would try. She would listen because even though she disliked how Anna would look down on herself so much, these were words coming from her. Not from Hans, not from her speculations and observations, but from Anna herself.

"I hated myself lots of times... for forcing this deal on you," Anna whimpered. "I-If only I didn't, m-maybe I would never figure it out. If only... If only I didn't ask that, maybe it would be easier. I know it's selfish, but it just hurt."

"Would you take it back?" Elsa asked, struggling not to cry when Anna finally looked at her. "That deal. If you can, will you take it back? Do you think... Do you think you only felt this way because of that?"

"No," Anna immediately answered. Elsa looked deep into her eyes, trying to find some sort of reassurance that can save her from the benefit of the doubt. "Elsa, I... That's not it. If you think that... that what I feel is some kind of imagination or misguided feelings because of our deal, you're wrong. It was only... what made me realize it."

"Are you sure?"

"Do you... know why none of my previous relationships worked out?" Anna asked, catching Elsa off guard. She briefly wondered if she should tell her, but a part of her already told her to be just as honest. If they were going to talk, it has to be a two-way street.

Sucking in a shuddering breath, Elsa shuffled in her pocket. Once she felt a piece of paper inside, she looked at Anna who was now looking at her curiously. Deciding not to prolong the redhead's agony any further, she took the paper out and showed it to Anna.

"T-That's..." Anna darted her eyes between the paper and Elsa.

"I... I kind of used your room when you left," Elsa guiltily admitted. "It was unusual going back there without you. Sorry... for barging in."

The silence that followed almost made Elsa shy away, but she didn't. Even though it was unsettling, Anna only looked at her in wonder. There was confusion, guilt, and embarrassment in her eyes, but not any hint of anger. Maybe uneasiness because Elsa entered the privacy of her room, but she wasn't mad.

"Did you read it?" Anna asked shakily.

"I did," Elsa answered, blushing when she remembered the contents. "But I don't want to assume. I mean, it's your feelings and I can't just... It makes me feel like I'm dictating what you should feel."

"It's okay." For the first time since they saw each other again, Anna smiled. It was shy, timid and barely noticeable, but it was there. "I just... You know how they all wanted me to avoid you, right?" When Elsa nodded, Anna lowered her head again. "I... I never told them you were gay."

"W-What?"

"Kristoff and Hans were the only ones who knew, but only because Kris went to the same high school and Hans figured it out on his own." Anna started fiddling with her fingers. "I didn't tell the others about your... preferences because I feel like... like it wasn't my position to say it. It's  _yours_."

"Then why did they ask you to a-avoid me?" Elsa stuttered because the very mention of the word 'avoid' already made her relive the memories of Anna avoiding her out of free will.  _Snap out of it, Elsa. She's right in front of you now!_

"Because I always talk about you," Anna pointed out. "I always tell them how you're so beautiful, sweet, kind, and that you're the most amazing person I've ever known."

"B-But what does that have to do with it?"

"They weren't afraid that you would jump on me, Elsa. They were afraid that I would jump on you." Anna gently informed, voice just loud enough for the blonde to hear.

Elsa had a hard time processing Anna's words. Her relationships didn't work out because the guys were afraid that she would jump on her? Then Hans' words were... real?  _Wait, no, no! This is no time to jump to conclusions again, Elsa!_ When she focused her eyes again, her heart jumped when she saw Anna looking at her with such gentle eyes.

"Kristoff. He's blonde and sweet, but I like your blonde more and... he's not as sweet as you," Anna began, a rosy hue painting her apple cheeks. "Jack has blue eyes, but his eyes weren't as wonderful as yours. Sled has pale skin but it wasn't as smooth and flawless as yours. Terrence and Elias both have blonde hairs but they weren't as soft and ethereal as your platinum blonde. Hans is..." She paused, eyes snapping to the floor. "...he's smart and responsible. When it comes to... reading me, he was the closest when it comes to you."

Elsa held her breath and looked at Anna in what she could only think was a blank expression. When she saw that paper inside Anna's room that day, she had a hunch about what it could mean, but she didn't want to be egoistic. She denied herself the right to be completely happy about something that Anna wrote in fits of anger or pain. She called Hans to ask him about some things, and sure enough... what he said was quite similar to what Anna was now telling her.

It was strange.

She had never felt so nervous in her entire life. Not even when Anna would unconsciously tease her with her innocence and childlike ministrations, not even when the redhead caught her off guard with a kiss or that time when Anna sat on her lap. No, this one was different. She was nervous, but with every word that fell out of Anna's mouth, no matter if it was about her exes, she still felt  _really_ warm.

"I always compare the things they do to you," Anna continued. "How caring they are, how smart they are, if they were good in any sport or if they were physically fit, if they can cook, or if they like chocolates. Even with that girl back in the bar. How you were taller, how I love your blonde more than hers, how your eyes shine brighter than hers, how your lips are naturally pinkish compared to hers."

Elsa watched another set of tears roll down Anna's cheeks. The redhead was biting her lower lip and wiping her tears away. She sobbed and choked, and Elsa didn't know if she was happy or sad about everything. Anna's words made her happy, but with the way the girl was crying because of her, she felt like she was being crushed.

"I see you everywhere, Elsa. I see you in everyone, and everything I look at reminds me of you." Anna wiped her tears in a futile attempt to dry them. "I-I think I already loved you far longer than I thought, and I... I guess that's  _really_  where that fake dating idea came from."

The moment Elsa heard that confession escape Anna's lips, a huge weight lifted off her shoulders. 'Love' was a strong word, and hearing from Anna that she loved her made all doubts and fears disappear in an instant. Even though Anna still had no idea, she felt like crying tears of joy and relief. She'd heard enough confirmation from Anna and it was a high time she stepped up.

"Anna, I—"

"I'm sorry," Anna said to cut her off. "I... I don't know how long it will take, but I'll try. I'll move on and maybe... maybe I can get rid of these feelings for you. I mean... it didn't work the same way as the other guys because even though it's been over a month, I can't really forget about you, but I'll try. I-It's hard, but I'll try. I don't... please don't hate me."

Elsa finally allowed her own tears to fall. She had seen Anna's crying face enough to last her a lifetime.  _I'm sorry_ , she said inwardly. She couldn't say it. Not yet. All she could do at that moment was to pull Anna in for a hug of her own. It didn't matter how long ago she last held the girl like this. What she cared about was how Anna was shaking uncontrollably with every sobs and whimper that escaped her lips.

"I don't hate you, Anna," Elsa cooed, pulling Anna closer if possible. "I won't hate you for this. It's not your fault."

"I'm sorry," Anna sobbed, clutching tightly to Elsa's shirt as though it was the only thing keeping her from falling apart.

Elsa leaned her cheek on Anna's head, taking that time to draw out some courage from the comfortable warmth wrapped around her. What should she say at moments like this? There were countless things she wanted to tell Anna that she just didn't know where to begin. She wanted to tell Anna about Belle's position in her life, about how wrong Anna was about her opinion of Elsa's feelings, about how painful it was when Anna ran away, and about everything else.

"I love you."

Elsa felt Anna stiffen against her, accompanied by a tiny gasp. The reaction she elicited made her blush tenfold, and the thought that she really did say those words made her blush a hundred. When Anna made a move to pull away from her, she instinctively tightened her hug.

"The reason why I'm gay is you, Anna," Elsa admitted. "I love you more than just a friend. I love you like how my parents love each other. I love you... in a way that I want us to be real."

"E-Elsa?!" Anna stuttered and judging by the heat that Elsa could feel on her neck, Anna was blushing as much as she was. "W-What are you...?"

Elsa pulled back just enough so she can press their foreheads together, and when their eyes met, she felt the whole world disappear. It didn't matter if there was a party going on inside Anna's house, or how she practically dragged the girl away for some alone time together. All that mattered at that moment was them.

"I'm in love with you, Anna," Elsa confessed with a voice barely above a whisper. But, god, did her heart just burst the moment she said it while looking deep into Anna's eyes. There was this feeling of anxiousness, but also an amazing joy because it had been years since she longed to say these words.

But Anna didn't get it.

Elsa could tell that she didn't get it. The intensity of the emotions inside her eyes was almost too palpable to ignore. All negative emotions directed to Elsa and herself. It crushed Elsa's heart to see how much Anna struggled to believe her words.  _I've hurt her too much_. The realization hit like a ton of bricks.

"You're too kind." Anna gently pushed herself away, hands trembling and a new set of tears just about to fall. "You don't have to pretend. That's... That just hurt me more," she whimpered, wiping her tears again.

"I'm not pretending," Elsa promised. "You said... you said that if I say something, you can tell if it's true. Tell me... Do you think I'm lying now?"

Anna's eyes widened just a fraction and struggled to remain on Elsa's, her whimpers the only thing filling in the silence. "I... I don't know!" Anna covered her face with both hands. "I want to believe you, but I can't. I'm scared! How? You... It's impossible because you said so yourself! It's weird that childhood friends would date! Elsa, w-what are you saying?"

"Anna," Elsa began and waited until Anna lowered her hands enough to see her eyes. "Before you asked for that fake relationship, I was already in love with you. I rejected your offer for 'help' because I was afraid that you'd notice my feelings, but then I ended up agreeing because I know that the only reason you would stop asking... is if I told you how I feel."

Anna's hands remained in front of her nose and lips, eyes the only feature visible to Elsa. It was enough because this was what she wanted. To say these things out loud while looking at Anna's eyes, to be completely honest in front of Anna, and to stop worrying about anything else.

"B-But you... that rule. Y-You said... you said we're not allowed to... fall. I-If you l-loved me even before that, why did you put it?" Anna asked, desperation lacing her voice.

Elsa looked at the paper she held, trying her best to remember just why on earth did she put that there. "I was afraid," Elsa admitted, tightening her hold on it before meeting Anna's gaze again. "I don't want to be just like your exes, Anna. I don't want you to fall for me if it was only the same kind of 'love' you had for them."

The emotions that flashed through Anna's eyes were a little too much to look at. Hurt, pain, doubt, joy, relief, and understanding, if it was possible. Elsa knew that her words might have hurt Anna, but that was what she felt. There were no other explanations for her putting that kind of rule other than that.

"Belle, she's... she's just a friend." Elsa wiped away her own tears. "I know I said that I want to try things out with her, but I only wanted to cut our deal off because it was getting harder for me. I love you, but I can't stay in that relationship when I know it's not going to get us anywhere."

"B-But... y-you let her in your room! You let her sleep in your bed! You... you don't like it when people do that..."

"I didn't sleep beside her. I can't sleep beside anyone but you." Elsa was honestly surprised that she didn't stutter. "I let her in my room because I trust her enough to do it, but only when I'm with her. You're different because I don't care if I'm not there. I trust you enough to let you in my room even without my permission, Anna."

"T-Then the mug!" Anna squeaked. "You never let me use yours, but you let her use it just like that!"

Elsa's cheeks instantly burned. "W-Would you rather I let her use yours?"

"W-What?"

"I know you have more than one mug, but I... I don't want to see someone else using yours. It makes me feel... sad." Elsa snapped her eyes to the floor.

"But you... you never let me use yours," Anna pointed out, voice laced with confusion.

"I..." Elsa swallowed. "I-If I let you use mine, I might... w-what would you feel if I use yours?"

With the way Anna's eyebrows rise up to her hairline and how a darker shade of red bloomed on her cheeks, Elsa knew she had gotten her point across. "Oh," Anna breathed. "B-But that night when you... when you celebrated with her. Y-You're not a party person."

Butterflies flew around her stomach, a proof that it had come down to this point and that there was no point in lying. Elsa had to convince herself that the issue about the mug was much more embarrassing than what she really did with Belle then, but she couldn't help but worry anyway.

"I... asked her how to make this." Elsa pulled out the bracelet from inside the pocket of her jacket. "W-When you said that you wanted to learn house duties to help me out, I wanted to return the favor. You're not comfortable about doing something like that, and I just... since I'm not really artistic, I figured it's only fair because it's also out of my comfort zone."

"For me?" Anna asked, curious eyes looking back to Elsa.

"That night..." Elsa lowered the bracelet. "I already made multiple attempts, but I wasn't satisfied. I asked Belle for some advice since she was also artistic, and I can't ask someone else," she admitted, and then she looked at the accessory. "I wanted to give it to you as a cheer up gift. That maybe if I can make something like this, then you'd know it won't be impossible for you to cook. B-But then, things started getting awkward between us, and I... I ended up not giving it."

Elsa didn't know what to do as Anna remained silent. What else was there to say? She already admitted her feelings, and honestly, this was the time when she hoped that Anna would just say something and save them both the awkwardness.

"That's so unfair," Anna said, snapping Elsa awake from her own train of thoughts. "I didn't go with you because I... I didn't want you to ignore me and just focus on her like you did when she first visited," she choked in between sobs. "It hurts because... because I cooked your favorite that night, but you asked me if it was alright for her to come over. It hurt because I thought you really like her. I... I thought... there was no way you'd feel the same for me..."

Elsa pursed her lips tight and pulled Anna closer in for a hug again. Thankfully, the girl didn't fight back, but she didn't hug back either. She was much too busy wiping away her tears and with every sob, Elsa felt her heart broke. Even though she didn't know about Anna planning something that night, it still made her feel incredibly guilty.  _I hurt her more than I knew_ , she bitterly thought.

"I'm sorry." Elsa squeezed, locking Anna in a protective embrace. Anna whined, but she couldn't say anything, and that was fine. Even Elsa didn't know what else to say. She knew that the girl wasn't blaming her. If anything, their situations were quite similar.

Anna cooking Elsa's favorite and Elsa tinkering with different art materials just to make a bracelet for her. They were both doing it for each other but ultimately ended up backfiring on them. Though if there was someone Elsa would rather blame, it would be herself. How could that one night she chose to go home late result into breaking Anna's heart over and over again?

"I'm sorry," Elsa repeated as she placed a soft kiss on Anna's temple and hugged her more protectively. It was an attempt to calm the girl, but unfortunately, it did just the opposite. Anna finally cried her eyes out without holding back. She trembled all over and if it wasn't for Elsa dragging her towards the privacy of their garden, people would probably panic.

Strange.

Elsa always hated seeing Anna cry. She hated how Anna would cry over every breakup, but she hated it more when she was the cause of it. This time though, she felt conflicted. It was like a mixture of pain and relief at once. It hurt because Anna was crying, but she also felt a sense of relief because even though she was bawling her eyes out and her cries could deafen anyone, Elsa knew these weren't tears of sorrow.


	31. Take A Chance

Elsa basked at the sight of Anna's tear-stained eyes. They were red and puffy, and even though it brought out her wonderful unique eye color, it made Elsa feel terrible. Swallowing once, she offered the bottle of water to the girl and watched as she shyly reached out for it.

"Thank you," said Anna.

Elsa smiled, watching Anna drink for a second before looking inside the house that was still so full of life even when it was already way past dinner time. She had to wonder just how much energy these children have, but it was merely a fleeting thought.

After Anna had calmed down from her earlier crying fit, Elsa left her alone for a few minutes to grab a bottle of water inside the house. She was reluctant to leave in fear that Anna would cry again, but she somehow managed to convince herself that if the girl would really cry, she would definitely need that water.

"Do you want to go inside?" Elsa asked after a moment of silence.

"Just a few more minutes. I... get the feeling everyone's going to ask what happened," Anna sighed and pulled the bottle closer to her chest.

"Okay." Elsa bit her lower lip and darted her eyes between Anna's face and the bottle. "I... I can stay with you if you want. B-But if you want to be alone..."

This was vastly new to her. It was true that she and Anna were in some kind of pseudo-relationship, but this time, there were feelings involved in both parties. She didn't know what to do. Even when she already had feelings for Anna in a long time, she had no idea what to do once Anna returned her feelings. This was the first time the redhead ever became emotional over something, and she didn't know how to face it.

And Anna knew.

Anna could tell that Elsa felt awkward and uncertain about how to approach her. They talked it out, sure, but it was still hard to believe. Just a few hours ago, she pondered about how to let go of her feelings for Elsa, and suddenly, the same woman told her she felt the same way. Everything that fell out of the blonde's lips sounded too genuine and real, but she still struggled to believe them.

Elsa. The ever so responsible, smart and sensible Elsa. How on earth did she fell in love with impulsive and hopeless romantic Anna? No matter how many times Anna thought about it, she couldn't find any convincing trait of hers that could make Elsa love her that way. None at all.

"It's... up to you," Anna answered truthfully.

If she could voice out her thoughts, she would say that, yes, she wanted Elsa to stay with her. But at the same time, she also didn't want to. Even when she already had previous relationships, she was still afraid because this was her first time dealing with a girl. A girl who returned her feelings. A girl who  _never_ had any experiences with anyone. A girl who just so happened to be her best friend. It was frightening because what if she wasn't good enough?

This was Elsa, and she was... just Anna.

Surprise filled Anna when Elsa sat beside her on the bench, a considerable distance between them. It was a guilty relief because Elsa left a space. It drove Anna to think that  _maybe_ she wasn't the only one uncomfortable in their current situation.

Weird.

That was what they both felt at that moment. It was weird because, for the first time in forever, they were awkward around each other. It was a different kind of awkwardness from when they thought the other couldn't feel the same way. Now, neither of them knew how they should proceed. What does this mean for the both of them? It was a huge elephant in the room, and they were both afraid to acknowledge it.

And so they simply sat in silence, both stealing glances when the other wasn't looking. Elsa was fiddling with her fingers, and she had given up on trying to spark a conversation. She had the time to gather her thoughts together ever since Anna left - all she needed was the reassurance. But she knew that Anna still needed the time to make sense of everything, so she waited patiently until the girl was ready to talk.

"Elsa?" Anna called, causing Elsa's breath to hitch. "I-I'm still... trying to take everything in. I mean it's... a little hard to believe all this."

"I know," Elsa assured, smiling to appease the girl. "It took me a while too. When you said those things after that double date... it feels too good to be true."

Anna's cheeks flared as she quickly averted her gaze to her own fingers toying with the water bottle. The action made Elsa's heart do a particular leap because she knew that Anna was blushing because of  _her_. It still felt surreal and almost like a dream, but here they were, sitting on a bench with Anna acting shy and awkward around her like it was the first time she ever had a crush.

"M-Maybe we should get in," Anna suggested.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," Anna promised. "Everyone might start looking. Or did they already ask you? You did get inside a while ago."

"I went through the back door. There're mostly just kids there and our... our parents already knew." Elsa quickly raised both hands when she saw panic flash across Anna's face. "N-Not everything! They just... they just knew there's something going on. I didn't tell them the... details."

Elsa couldn't help but smile the moment Anna's shoulders slumped visibly. She knew she couldn't tell their parents right off the bat. They'd only talked about it a few minutes ago, and she knew that Anna was still a mess. At least her thoughts were. Elsa couldn't very well just tell their parents about everything that happened either because it wasn't only her privacy but Anna's too.

"I see," Anna sighed, relief clear in her voice, and then she stood up. "Well, I... doubt that Olaf's looking for us, but maybe we should still get in?" As if on cue, they heard high-pitched voices from inside the house. Anna cringed. "Too loud?"

"I don't mind." Elsa shook her head and stood up. They shared a quick eye-contact, and then they snapped their eyes elsewhere.  _Wow, it's really awkward_. "Uhm... here." She offered the bracelet to the girl. "I don't know if you'll like it, but I just thought the color matches your eyes."

Anna's cheeks darkened crimson once more as she fixated her gaze on the intricate design of the bracelet. There were two threads weaved: blue and slightly blue-green. If she was to compare them to something, it would be of hers and Elsa's eyes. There were also small pendants of silver snowflakes which glistened from any kind of light source surrounding the area.

"How... how many did you...?"

"It doesn't matter," Elsa answered, but she inwardly panicked when Anna lowered her eyes. "I don't remember," she admitted. "I always tangle the strings, beads, and pendants. A-And then if I ever finished something, I realized that I didn't like the color combination."

When Anna's eyes lowered again, Elsa felt guilty once more. This time, Anna didn't look hurt for being denied the knowledge of something, but she looked guilty. Again. And Elsa never liked it when Anna would feel guilty for something she willingly did.

"Anna, I did this because I wanted to. You didn't ask me, so don't feel bad."

"But—"

"No 'buts'," Elsa insisted. "I don't want to hear you apologize for something  _I_ made for you."

"I still ran away," Anna pointed out. "I-I ran away and didn't answer any of your calls or texts. That's rude and mean. I'm sorry... for leaving like that."

"But we're here now, right? It's okay now. I get why you did it, Anna. I'm not blaming you," Elsa promised, but Anna still looked unconvinced. "If you're that worried, then... let me put this on you."

"W-What?"

Elsa smiled. "I want to put it on you, but only if you'll let me. If you're uncomfortable, I won't."

With Anna only looking at her with that surprised look on her face, Elsa felt like she just said something so out of character. Maybe she did, but she didn't mind. Knowing that the usually bright, cheerful, lively and rambunctious redhead would act nervous, demure and timid around her was... a boost to her own ego.

A grin brightened up her face the moment Anna's head lowered and shyly stretched out her arm, giving her silent permission to put the bracelet on her wrist. The submissive response made her feel like a total love-struck fool - and she was. She took one step forward because of the slight distance between them and, with a shaky inhale, gently placed the bracelet on Anna's wrist.

"Thank you," Anna said softly, it was almost a whisper.

"No, Anna," Elsa insisted, taking a few seconds to marvel at the sight of the redhead wearing the bracelet she personally made. "Thank  _you_."

Anna's lips parted, and Elsa was sure she heard a soft intake of breath. The truth was that when she made the bracelet, she hadn't expected it to be given at such a moment. All she had planned was to give it to Anna as some sort of cheer up gift, an attempt to show the girl that if she could make something artistic, Anna could handle cooking too. In the end, it ended up looking like some sort of promise... but Elsa wouldn't complain.

"Let's go?" Elsa offered a hand, waiting ever so patiently for Anna to take it. They stood like that for a moment until Anna reached out to her proffered hand.

Elsa could feel how sweaty Anna's palm was. No, she wasn't trembling. For that, Elsa was grateful. She was just nervous, and so was Elsa. That was why she squeezed Anna's hand as a silent comfort - a proof that she wasn't alone in this, whatever they were. Her smile only grew the moment she saw Anna's shy smile relaxing. With that as a sign, she gently guided them back inside the house.

* * *

"Why not stay over?"

Bulda and Elsa winced when they heard a loud crash. They both turned their heads by the sink to see Anna biting her lower lip.

"Sorry!" Anna shrieked and tried her best to wash the dishes while suppressing a blush. Elsa fought the urge to giggle at the redhead's antics and actions, deciding to hold back on the teasing for a while. She didn't want to make fun of Anna until after she finished washing.

It was quite a sight to see. Anna was wearing a flowery apron in what Elsa could only think as Bulda forcing on her. But truth be told, Elsa was the one who offered to wash, but Anna glared at her and shoved her to the side while mumbling something like it was already her who did the job before. In the end, Elsa found herself holding the towel and drying the plates the girl had finished washing.

At least until Bulda suggested that she should stay over for the night.

Judging by the older woman's huge grin, she was having quite a show. She was obviously teasing, and it was working wonders on her own daughter. Of course, it did wonders to Elsa too, but she was much more accustomed to hiding her uneasy side. That was to say, only Anna could bring that side of her to the surface.

"Mommy, our house is literally across yours," Elsa deadpanned.

"True, but don't you want to stay? You used to do that a lot," Bulda insisted. "And it's also Olaf's birthday."

"I'm sorry, mommy," Elsa smiled apologetically. "I also miss mama and papa. I promise I'll drop by tomorrow for a visit. I'm only here for a week, and I want to catch up with everyone."

"Still as sensible as ever," Bulda winked playfully, and Elsa answered with a shrug. "Anna still has a long way to go to reach your level of being responsible, huh?"

"Hey!" Anna whined.

"Actually,  _I'm_  the one who has a long way to go," Elsa corrected, making both redheads look at her.

"What do yo—"

"Elsie?" All heads turned towards the door to see Gerda poking her head inside. "Oh, you're all here! I've tucked Olaf in, and the guys are done cleaning up the mess. Kai and I will be going ahead. I still need to make his usual midnight tea. How about you?" she asked Elsa after directing the information to everyone.

"I'll just finish these." Elsa lifted a glass for emphasis.

Gerda nodded. "Well, it was a wonderful afternoon slash evening, and we all need to rest. I'll be dropping by tomorrow if I feel like it." Gerda rolled her eyes, causing Bulda to laugh and shoo her away.

"Elsie, lock the door when you come home, okay?" Gerda asked but didn't bother waiting for a response. Bulda followed along to show her visitors out and probably to have another small talk before completely separating for the day.

The rest of dish duty went by without Elsa or Anna saying a single word. Being the one with more experience of multitasking, Elsa would take a glimpse of the redhead from time to time. Admittedly, Anna was doing a wonderful job. The silverware and cutleries weren't slippery, and they also didn't smell like anything.

"Did you get home alright that day?" Elsa asked once Anna handed her the last plate.

"Hmm?" Anna turned off the faucet and dried her hands.

"When you left. You were crying." Elsa dried the last plate and felt slightly disappointed when Anna removed the apron. "Were you alright traveling on your own?"

"A little," Anna mumbled under her breath, but Elsa still frowned. "I'm here, right? I'm okay. I was crying, but I ended up falling asleep anyway. Arendelle's the last sto—"

"You fell asleep on the bus?!"

"W-Well, my eyes grew tired and heavy, and..." Anna stopped when she saw the tensed look on Elsa's face. "Can we... Can we not talk about it? I mean, you obviously feel responsible for it," she insisted, shoulders hunching to her ears. "I'm the one who ran away and got hurt on my own."

Elsa felt bad for her reaction, seeing guilt envelop Anna again. "Stop apologizing, Anna. I don't want to hear you say that again. I don't like seeing you like this."

"Like what?"

"Guilty. Insecure. I'm the one who made you cry. I'm the one who's supposed to be apologizing."

"You didn't know," Anna said. "And it doesn't change the fact that I left you there alone and didn't even respond to any of your texts. It's... What kind of friend am I?"

"Stop that." Elsa turned to face the girl completely. "I was also at fault. Stop blaming yourself so much." Elsa gently held one of Anna's hands and squeezed lightly. "I'm sorry for hurting you, Anna. I really am. But if we're just going to apologize to each other, it will never end."

Elsa could tell that Anna was still hesitant, that she was still blaming herself for leaving that day and for ignoring her. Then, along with that guilt, there was also doubt. Doubt about everything that could become of them.

"I... I'll try."

It was soft and unsure, but Elsa accepted it. However, she also knew that if it was only Anna, it might backfire, so she promised herself that she would help. She would extinguish all doubts and insecurities no matter how hard it would be. Anna had broken down all of her fears and negative thoughts - it was only fair she'd return the favor. Besides, she was partly to blame. There was no way she'd give up on them now.

"Thank you." Elsa smiled. "Okay, I... I think I need to go."

Anna ushered her towards the front door. As they passed by the living room, she briefly excused herself to Bulda and Cliff and promised to drop by the next day. True to her mother's words, the house was already free from any kind of mess. As soon as Anna's parents were done with their subtle teasing and compliments, the two made their way outside.

"Elsa?" Elsa turned around to face Anna who was twiddling her thumbs. "What do you mean back there? A-About how... how you're the one who still has a long way to go?"

For a few seconds, Elsa pondered what Anna was talking about. A second later and something clicked. Anna was staring at her curiously and Elsa debated on whether she should say it or not. In the end, she almost laughed at the expectant look in Anna's eyes.

"It meant what it meant." Elsa was amused as Anna's face contorted into confusion. "Don't think too much about it, Anna. There's no double meaning behind that. It just meant that I have a long way to go."

"But you're already responsible."

"I am, but I still have a lot to learn," Elsa agreed. "Like sleeping at the right hour? Getting enough hours of sleep? Not skipping any meal? Not overexerting myself?" Her face heated up when realization glinted in Anna's eyes. "You'll help me, right?" Elsa mentally patted herself on the back for a job well done when red bloomed on Anna's cheeks.

"Yo—"

"It's getting late, Anna. We need to rest." It was a little too late, but the embarrassment of being too blunt and open about her feelings finally caught up to Elsa.  _I guess I still have a lot to learn when it comes to that too_ , she mentally noted.

"O-Okay," Anna reluctantly agreed.

Anna was fiddling with her fingers again while Elsa just stood there, contemplating about what to do. Back then, she would just leave Anna's residence without any problem or second thoughts, but there was something about the atmosphere now that was vastly different from before. Something that made her want to...

"Goodnight, Anna," Elsa whispered after giving Anna a soft gentle kiss on the cheek.

"G-Goodnight," Anna squeaked, her voice rising a few octaves. The adorable blunder made Elsa smile lovingly, causing the girl's pinkish cheeks to glow brighter. Still, Elsa didn't look away. She didn't, because she wanted to imprint Anna's embarrassed face inside her head for the rest of the night.


	32. What Have I Done?

Anna's eyes were puffy from her crying fit the previous night, but she couldn't bring herself to care. The morning shower did its job, taking out the tiredness and exhaustion from it. Although, with one look, it was very noticeable that she did cry a lot. However, she didn't mind because she had the right presence of mind to admire the bracelet Elsa made for her.

Because of everything that happened, Anna hadn't fully noticed how  _beautiful_ it was. For someone who wasn't interested in arts and crafts, Elsa nailed it. Granted, she did multiple attempts until she reached this point. Anna still had mixed feelings about that but tried her best to let it go. How could she stay mad when Elsa did it for her? The only thing she didn't like much about it was that Belle was the one Elsa went to for help. Was Belle fine with that? Wasn't she into Elsa too?

"Anna, I'm afraid you might burn that bracelet with how hard you stare at it." Bulda was giggling behind the stove.

"I can't help it! The colors, they're... they're my favorites!" Anna commented. "I-I can't believe she did this for me.  _Me!_  Reckless, idiot me! How can she make me something like this?!"

"I don't know, but you won't hear me complain. I told you, I like her for you. My opinion hasn't changed even after all that drama."

"I still don't get it," Anna said more calmly. "Why me?"

It wasn't as if she had told her mother what happened, but she was almost sure that Bulda already knew. She knew about her feelings, and if Anna knew her mother well, she probably understood those shy actions and awkward glances between her and Elsa from the previous night.

"Stop wondering and just rejoice!" Bulda raised her hand. "Your feelings were returned. Why are you worried about little things like that? She loves you, and that's it!"

Something about the response made Anna frown. She eyed her mother suspiciously to find any sort of hint, but Bulda only stood her ground. Anna raised an eyebrow. "Are you hiding something from me?"

"Oh, I hide a lot of things. I like surprising my children and, mostly, everyone." Bulda wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Anna groaned before leaning on the kitchen counter. Sometimes, she couldn't tell if her mother was purposely trying to play mind tricks or was truly laid back. It was hard to take her seriously when she would always grin, wink, or wiggle her eyebrows as if she was fooling around.  _I guess I got it from her_ , she thought grimly.

"Annaaaaaaa!"

Anna shrieked and landed on her rear, no thanks to a little redhead who decided to tackle her early in the morning. She groaned and ungracefully massaged her butt as much as she could in her position on the floor. "What was that for?!" Anna hissed through gritted teeth.

"Where's Elsie?! You didn't play with me last night! Mama made me sleep!" Olaf jumped on her belly, effectively making her groan with unladylike sounds. "Anna, call Elsie!"

"Olaf! Ouch! Hey!" Anna grabbed his little wrists and adjusted her position, trying hard not to be rough since the boy was still growing. "Olaf, that hurt." She frowned, but he only gave her an adorable pout. "No pouty faces! That hurt, and I'm not going to call Elsa!"

"Annaaaaaaa!" Olaf whined and tugged on her shirt.

"Mom! Help me out here!"

"Why don't you call Elsie so he would stop?" Bulda grinned.

"Call me for what?" All heads turned to see Elsa standing by the door while looking around the kitchen in confusion. "Uhm... Are you okay?" she asked as soon as she saw Anna still sitting on the floor.

"Elsie!" Olaf beamed and  _finally_ let go of Anna's shirt to run and give Elsa a hug. "You're here! Anna said she won't call you!"

"Oh?" Elsa looked at Anna questioningly.

"T-That's... He tackled me and kept calling for you which kind of ended with our wrestling." Anna cringed and flinched a little when she tried to stand up. She tried to rub her rear as slowly and discreetly as she could.

"He almost cried, you know," Bulda informed, grinning.

Anna could barely catch her jaw from dropping. This was so unfair. It was almost as if they were having a fit with seeing her 'well-behaved' whenever Elsa was around. And even when Elsa wasn't there, the words spilling out of Olaf's lips and her parents' were Elsa, Elsa, and Elsa! It was already Elsa inside her head, but did everyone in her family really have to love Elsa so much too?!

Anna jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes landed on a pair of beautiful blue eyes, along with an understanding smile on Elsa's face. She mentally sighed in relief and smiled apologetically, in which Elsa only responded with a nod. Elsa looked at Olaf who was still hugging her like she was her only lifeline.

"Olaf, you can't do that," Elsa gently admonished as she knelt in front of him. "You can't just tackle your sister out of nowhere."

"But she said she won't call you!" Olaf pouted.

Elsa fought the urge to grin at the way he looked like a male version of Anna. The only difference between them was that Olaf's eyes were blue, and Anna's was somewhere in between blue and green. "I always come over when I'm here, Olaf."

When Olaf sighed and started poking his little index fingers together, Elsa knew she made her point. She looked at Anna to see her smiling thankfully.  _What a wonderful morning_. She swallowed once and looked at Olaf again, sending a gentle look when the boy looked at her with a slight uneasiness.

"I'm... I'm sorry, Anna," Olaf said shyly.

This had always been the issue when it came to Olaf. He wouldn't stop fooling around when it came to Anna, and he wouldn't care whether or not she got angry. Maybe because he couldn't tell if she was serious, or maybe he was just pushing her buttons. Elsa wouldn't know; she didn't have any siblings. That was why whenever Olaf would get out of hand, it would always be her who would admonish instead of Anna. The boy would listen and take her seriously whenever she did.

"How about this?" Anna hunched over to reach Olaf's eye level. "You're going to help prepare breakfast, and then we're going to play later. Sound good?"

"Okay!" Olaf cheered and ran to his mother who was chuckling and watching them in amusement. For a brief moment, the two girls blushed because even if they didn't say anything, they had forgotten that Bulda was there.

"Sorry about that." Anna smiled apologetically.

Elsa frowned. "You're apologizing again."

"Right. Uhm... okay, uhm, thanks," Anna said shyly, and when Elsa only looked at her through narrowed eyes, she groaned. "Cut me some slack, Elsa. If we're counting the hours, it hasn't even been a day since we talked!"

"Fine." Elsa stood up, and Anna followed. "I'm glad your eyes aren't as worse as I thought," she commented and her eyes widened in horror when she realized what she said. "I mean it wasn't as puffy as I thought! You cried a lot last night and I was... worried if it'd get puffy today."

"Does it look bad?" Anna asked anxiously because even when she managed to wipe away the puffiness a little, she couldn't get it all off.  _Serves me right for crying so much_ , she bitterly thought.

Elsa took that time to look at Anna's eyes. To admire them. They were still as beautiful as she remembered when she walked away last night. Even if they were still puffy, they were still lovely to look at. There was something about the puffiness and wetness that made the color shine even brighter. But could she say that? Wouldn't that make her sound a little weird?

"No," Elsa admitted anyway.

"You hesitated," Anna noted. "It looks weird, doesn't it? They're still swollen."

"It's cute," Elsa blurted. "I like it. I mean the color becomes darker and it looks nice. B-But I also like your natural eyes. They're bright and lively and... beautiful."

Elsa let her eyes dance around the room, refusing to meet Anna's. She couldn't after saying those words that screamed how much she might've been checking Anna out before. But when she saw Bulda's split-eating grin, she ended up feeling even more awkward. The knowing look that was just  _there_ made her blush, and she had to do her best to keep it as subtle as she could.

"Oh," Anna managed to stutter out. "Uhm... th-thanks." A few seconds of comfortable silence fell upon the two, both of them blushing like a couple of high school kids. "Did you... did you already eat breakfast?"

"Y-Yeah," Elsa answered, glad for the change of topic. "I ate with mama and papa. They said they'll come over sometime during the day."

Anna nodded, a smile on her face slightly dimmed by the flash of sadness in her eyes. Elsa opened her mouth to say something, but before the words came out, the continuous clattering of a plate made her stop.

"Elsie won't eat?" Olaf asked from one of the stools, his hand outstretched and holding on to one plate. "I wanna eat with you and Anna! I didn't get to eat with you last night."

"I think that's normal for a party," Anna deadpanned.

"It's fine, isn't it?" Bulda grabbed the plate Olaf was giving her. "You don't have to eat a lot if you're not hungry. I'm sure he just really missed you both. It's been a while."

Elsa looked at Anna to ask for help or permission, but the words were stuck in her throat when she caught the girl looking back at her. The moment Anna gave her  _that look_ , there was already a clear answer. There was no way she could say 'no' to that. She looked at Olaf's pouting face and to the meal that Bulda cooked for them. She wasn't hungry, but she couldn't deny the boy some quality time either. She and Anna rarely came home, and when they do, it would only be for a span of a week or two.

"Okay," Elsa relented and was rewarded with the sight of a beaming Olaf.

* * *

Anna laid down face flat on the sofa after being dragged to a half-assed volleyball game with Olaf and Elsa. Thank God it wasn't hot outside but, damn, did she get exhausted. Somehow, Olaf was so terrible to a point Anna had to run a lot to catch the ball. Just when she thought she was already bad at sports, she had to see her little brother do it.  _At least Elsa found it amusing_ , she noted with a stupid grin.

"Annaaaaaaa! More!" Olaf tugged on her shirt.

" _Ugh_. Go play with Elsa. I'm out," Anna groaned and tried to shoo him away.

"But it's fun playing with you both," Olaf whined. The side of Anna's lips twitched in irritation. Was this how Elsa would feel whenever she dealt with her?

"Olaf, we've been playing for hours," Elsa's voice chimed. Anna adjusted on the sofa to face them both when Olaf finally let go of her shirt, watching Elsa place a pitcher of iced tea and three glasses on top of the coffee table. "Your sister is getting old and she needs more time to rest."

"Hey! You're older than me by a few months!" Anna huffed and received a light giggle from the blonde.

Thankfully, Olaf didn't bother forcing her to play anymore. Instead, he sat in front of the coffee table with Elsa. He started talking about his friends and how much they all love the robots that Anna bought for him. Anna already heard the entire thing countless times that she basically memorized everything.

When Anna hoisted herself up from the sofa, Elsa poured iced tea on one glass and placed it on the redhead's side of the table. They shared a simple smile before Elsa focused on listening to Olaf's stories again. Anna sat across them, grabbing one of her sketchpads that already had a permanent residence on top of the table.  _Might as well draw while waiting_ , she thought.

" _—_ like them," Olaf ended his story with a yawn.

The girls watched the boy lean his head on the coffee table. A few seconds later and they started to hear his soft breathing, signaling that he ended up asleep. "Just like you," Elsa noted. "You used to fall asleep while talking."

"Wha- I don't!" Anna frowned in denial.

"You do." Elsa lifted Olaf up and placed him gently on the sofa, carefully adjusting him to a comfortable position. "You ramble about different fairy tales and love stories until you fall asleep."

Anna's fingers twitched. When she looked at Elsa, she saw a serene smile on the girl's face that she didn't know how to take in, and she only looked at her sketchpad again.  _I did talk a lot about romance before_ , she bitterly thought. What did Elsa think then? Was she hurt? Was she fine with it?

"What did you draw?"

Anna's insides started flipping as soon as she heard the close velvety voice. She could see from her peripheral vision that Elsa was sitting beside her, and because she was almost sure she'd end up apologizing for being dense, she decided not to talk and simply show the sketch to Elsa.

"You're getting better." Elsa smiled as she carefully slid her long fingers into the drawing as if she was afraid it'd get ruined by her touch. "But you drew me again."

"I had nothing to do. I've heard his story countless times already." Anna grabbed the glass and drank its contents, trying not to look too nervous.

"What's in your mind, Anna?" Elsa asked out of the blue, causing Anna to choke on her drink.

"W-What?"

"There's something bothering you. What is it?" Elsa insisted, leaving Anna completely stunned. She could see that the blonde was genuinely worried, and she started feeling even guiltier.  _I really can't hide anything from her_ , she noted.

"I wish you'd stop reading me like that," Anna sighed.

"It's hard not to. You wear your emotions up your sleeve."

"I do?" Anna asked, and Elsa only shrugged and smiled knowingly. It was a reassurance, and the redhead can only sigh in defeat. She looked at her sketch and let her fingers caress the unique paper on it, eyes stuck on her drawing of Elsa.

What  _was_  bothering her? A lot of things, really. She was bothered by everything. About her, about Elsa, about their relationship, about Belle, and about their families. It was strange because even though a part of her knew that Elsa wasn't lying, she still couldn't believe it. She wanted to be with Elsa as a lover, but she couldn't believe it.  _No..._ She was  _hesitant._ There were a lot of 'what ifs' and possibilities that could branch out from them actually getting together, which also meant that there was a possibility of things  _not_  working out.

"I... I was just wondering about Belle."

"What about her?"

"Why did she help you out?" Anna cringed when she realized how accusing and doubtful that sounded like. "I-I mean, you did it for me and... was she fine with that? I mean, she likes you. D-Doesn't that kind of..."

"What makes you think she likes me?" Elsa asked. "You didn't talk much when she came over and during that double date. I'm pretty sure she didn't tell you anything."

"Have you seen the way she looked at me?" Anna whisper-shouted, afraid to wake her little brother. "She  _glares_ at me, Elsa. She frowns all the time. I didn't do anything to annoy her. Well, aside from being so loud when she came over. But even before that, she was already glaring. Back when I first saw her, and even in the gym when I visited you before we... we faked everything."

Elsa's face scrunched in deep thought, but she didn't cut her eye contact. Anna held her gaze. She  _tried_ to, but something about the look in Elsa's eyes made her feel... small. She cut the eye contact and focused on the sketchpad again.

"Are you still jealous?"

"I don't know," Anna admitted. She's pretty even if she always frowns, and... I get the feeling that she's also smart. She's responsible and... you get along well."

"Anna, just because Belle and I get along doesn't mean she likes me," Elsa informed, leaning closer and trying to catch Anna's gaze. "Besides, I already have someone I like."

"B-But..."

"If it helps, you're not the only one she looks at that way," Elsa pointed out. "She always glares and frowns at everyone, including me."

"What?" Anna raised a confused brow. "I don't remember her looking at you like that."

"That's because whenever you see us together, we're always near each other." Elsa smiled, utterly amused and strangely delighted that Anna was jealous. "Belle is nearsighted, Anna. She wears thick eyeglasses and she was insecure about it. She only wears it when she's alone or with people she considers a friend. That glare and frown was only her squinting and trying to look at things clearly from a distance."

"She doesn't wear contact lenses?" The crease in the middle of Anna's eyebrows deepened.

"She's afraid to wear one." Elsa shrugged, but Anna continuously eyed her suspiciously. "Look, I can try and ask her to show you her glasses. If it helps, I'm not going to let her in my room again. I won't let her use my mu _—_ "

"Stop," Anna said to cut Elsa off, frowning. "If you say that, I might just agree, you know."

"I don't mind."

"Elsa," Anna warned. "I don't want to tell you what to do. I don't want to restrict your actions and contact with other people. That sounds... possessive."

"Is that wrong?" Elsa wondered, folding her arms and leaning them on the table. "It's not like I'm going to cut off all my connections with her. She's still my friend. I'm just not going to let her use my bed and in my room. Besides, you being possessive is... I think I actually want you to be."

Anna's jaw dropped, unable to understand how on earth Elsa said something like  _that_ without stuttering. "Y-You... Elsa, how can you say something like that with a... a straight face?!"

"Well..." Elsa drawled, and then a playful smirk tugged at her lips. "When the woman I'm in love with was the one who taught me how to flirt or treat a woman right, I think I can pick up a lot of things." She winked, and just when Anna thought that her face couldn't get any hotter, it did.

_What have I done?_


	33. It's Too Much

_Mine_.

It might be selfish, but Elsa wouldn't take it back. Not when she could see Anna wearing that bracelet. Ever since she had given it, Anna never took it off. At least that was what she liked to think. Maybe Anna removed it while sleeping or taking a shower, but outside of those, it was always around her wrist. It never failed to make Elsa's heart swell with pride. It was almost as if Anna was... hers.

The truth was that Elsa didn't know where she stood. She had no idea what they were. They made their feelings clear, so now what? She wasn't eager to officially call Anna hers, but there was a slight discomfort not knowing her own limits when it came to physical contact.

Elsa enjoyed spending time with Anna, but she had to wonder if hugging and kissing on the forehead or cheek was still alright. Anna didn't seem to mind when she did it during Olaf's birthday, but she wasn't doing anything intimate either. In fact, it was almost as if she was trying to avoid even the mere brush of their fingers. So, really, where do they go from here?

"What's wrong?"

Elsa's train of thoughts was cut off by Anna's angelic voice. The girl had been drawing on her sketchpad again when she noticed how Elsa was just staring. It was quite a comfortable silence, but the blonde's bothered face... bothered her too.

"Nothing. I was just admiring the view."

Anna had to suppress a blush. Unless she was dreaming, she was sure Elsa was just staring at her. Even when she was touched by the half-hearted compliment, she didn't let it show. "Elsa," Anna warned.

Elsa sighed. "I was just thinking."

"About...?" Anna asked when Elsa didn't say anything else. She tried not to frown when the blonde started shuffling in her seat. "And here I thought you were starting to get bold."

As Elsa's eyes met hers, Anna could see the gears inside her head turning. She tried to think of what could possibly be bothering Elsa, she had nothing to go on by. There was nothing about the conversation that could guide her to that hint. Besides, most of her speculations always turned out to be false. It was better to ask the source herself.

"I-I might be crossing some line here, but..." Elsa began, stuttering. "Actually, never mind."

"Elsa," Anna added a firmness in her voice. The nervous and uneasy antics made her feel uncomfortable. "What is it? You can tell me anything, you know."

"I... I don't know how to say this, but..." Elsa stopped to swallow. "It's just... what does this mean? For us?"

Anna had a hard time processing Elsa's words. She blinked and blinked, sitting as still as a statue, and then she started to panic the moment she realized Elsa was asking her something she was afraid to acknowledge herself. A question she had no answer to, but also a question she  _should_ have an answer to. If they were talking experience, she should know what they were. She should know where they stood, where they should go, and what they should do, but she didn't.

She was also in the dark.

It was the first time she ever felt like this, and she had no idea what to do. It was overwhelming and scary. It felt wonderful and amazing, but scary nonetheless. Their feelings were mutual, sure, but what if it didn't work out? What would happen to them? Could they still be the same as before if they ever broke up? The thought alone made Anna afraid to take a leap.

"Actually, nevermind," Elsa said shakily, catching Anna's attention again. "Sorry, just forget it. I'm... I'm not trying to pressure you or anything."

Anna sucked a shuddering breath and looked around the place. She and Elsa were sitting around a table by her garden. Olaf was in school and her mother went out somewhere with Gerda. Her dad was in his office, and so was Kai. They had both of their houses to themselves. If they were going to talk about this, now would be a perfect time. Moreover, she didn't like it when Elsa took her words back. It gave her the impression that Elsa was holding back or was afraid to be honest with her.

"You're not," Anna promised, relieved when Elsa looked at her again. "To be honest, I really don't know. I mean, I get it already, but I'm not sure. This—" She gestured between the two of them. "—thing going on between us? I don't know how to put it, Elsa. It's also a first for me, because even if I had many boyfriends, you and I both know I wasn't serious about any of them."

Elsa's eyebrows rose a tiny bit, almost as if she didn't expect Anna to give her an answer. The mere thought of it made Anna want to slap herself because she never wanted to see that expression on the blonde.  _She's more clueless than I am_ , she mentally berated herself.

"I... I want to be with you, Anna. For Real. But I need you to be sure. If we're going to do this, I want us to do it together."

Anna's heart swelled at the consideration. It was almost too much hearing these words from Elsa. To hear her say that she wanted them to be together. Anna knew that Elsa was serious, so much that she was being careful of her actions, afraid she'd come off as so eager. Elsa was every bit as scared as she was. The only difference was that Elsa was trying to face her fears, while Anna... She was stuck.

"I feel the same way, Elsa. I really do." Elsa looked at her nervously, probably sensing that there was a 'but' in there somewhere. "But I'm scared. What if this doesn't work out? What if someday, one of us falls out of love? I feel like if that happened, not only will we break up, but the friendship we built over the years... I don't want to lose that."

"Anna..."

"I can't help but feel like I'm going to mess something up," Anna admitted, unable to stop herself now that she started voicing out her thoughts. "You said that I'm the reason why you're gay, but I didn't even notice. You said you felt that way even before we started that deal, but I couldn't even tell. I was dense and totally oblivious. What if one day, I hurt you and I didn't even realize it? What if I ended up saying something that can make you cry?"

"Anna." Elsa reached out and held her hands. "Believe me, I know how you feel. Ever since I started feeling this way for you, I've had my fair share of fears. For a long time, I was afraid to think of what could happen if you ever find out." She let go of one hand and cupped Anna's cheek to wipe away some treacherous tears. "But no matter how hard I tried, there was one 'what if' I couldn't get myself to forget."

"W-What?" Anna managed to stutter out in between sobs, hyperaware of how much Elsa's hand was being gentle when holding her cheek. The touch and caresses, they were so gentle and sweet that it made her wish that this would never end.

"'What if she felt the same way?'" Anna's tiny whimpers tone down as she tried to process Elsa's words. Too soon for her liking, the hand on her cheek was gone, reaching down to hold her hand instead. "I didn't want to think about it because it felt like I was only deluding myself. I tried to stop, but obviously, I can't. We wouldn't be here now if I was able to, right?"

"Elsa..."

"I know I'm not who you thought you'd end up liking." Elsa accompanied her words with a squeeze of Anna's hands. "I know I'm nowhere near as any of those leading artists in your fairytales and romance films. I'm not a prince charming. I'm not romantic, and sometimes I don't like too much clinginess. But I love you, Anna, and knowing that you feel the same way makes me want to fight for this. For us."

"But why?" Anna half-whispered, half-choked. "Why me? Why do you love me? I'm nowhere near as... as smart as you! There are a lot of girls out there who's better than me! I'm not even good at things other than drawing and fooling around! I'm impulsive and I always drag you along with me even when you're already too exhausted to do anything! If... If we get serious, what if you get tired of me? What if one day, you realize that I'm not good enough? What i—"

"Stop." Elsa frowned and Anna could only whimper in surprise. "I told you before, and I'll say it again: you are  _not_ a burden. You're not a headache and I'll never get tired of you. I've known you all my life, Anna, and you're more than just good enough for me. I don't want someone as smart as I am, or someone who can do a lot of things. I don't care about those because I only want  _you_."

Anna's tears began flowing nonstop. Because Elsa didn't like it, she stood and ran to the other side of the table, sitting down beside the girl. When she pulled Anna closer to her, she immediately felt those shaking hands clutching on to her shirt.

"Mommy told me you've been cooking since you came home. I've also seen you wash the dishes. Back in the apartment, you tried to do things you normally wouldn't do just to help me," Elsa cooed, rubbing along Anna's arm. "You're trying, Anna, and that's what I like about you. You don't give up. You're always willing to go far for me even before all of this started. It's true, you're impulsive, but you didn't drag me to anything. I followed you willingly."

Anna pulled back a little to look at Elsa. "B-But the deal..."

"You didn't force it on me. I agreed to it on my own," Elsa assured as she wiped away Anna's tears. "I'm sick and tired of always dwelling on negative thoughts, Anna. No relationship is perfect, but that's why there're two of us. To work things out. If something goes wrong, we face it together."

"What if we can't? Elsa, you've been nothing but good to me. I don't want to hurt you..."

"Listen." Elsa pressed their foreheads together, forcing Anna to look at her again. "I'm not as perfect as you think I am. I'm not artistic like you. Many times, I get a series of headaches because of overexerting myself from sleepless nights. I don't care what happens to me as long as I can get things done. Being a perfectionist isn't always healthy. I'm just every bit as reckless as you."

"W-What are you...?"

"What I'm trying to say is..." Elsa inhaled silently, trying to get the words past the huge lump in her throat. "You're not the only one with flaws. You're not the only one who's afraid. I'm scared that things won't work out for us too, but I'm much more terrified I'll lose you to someone without even trying."

There was a loud thumping inside Anna's chest enough to ring in her ears as she listened to Elsa's words. They were just words, but hearing them from Elsa made her feel so... special.

"I can't promise you a perfect relationship. I won't promise that there will be no misunderstandings, no heartbreaks, and no tears between us, but I can promise you that I'll put in the effort for this. For you because you deserve it, and for us, because I know it's worth it." Elsa promised with a smile, her voice soft but held such powerful determination. "I love you, Anna, and I'm willing to take this risk with you."

Speechless.

That was what Anna was after hearing Elsa's words. She had enough of an emotional rollercoaster ride ever since that damn double date. Pain, joy, and pretty much everything else. It was a holiday of emotions. Hearing Elsa say these words...

It was too much.

Every word that spilled out of her best friend's lips sent her melting to a point she was practically a puddle. She couldn't say anything, couldn't even speak. For the first time in her life, she was lost for words.

_I really do love you._

_So much..._

Elsa's tiny gasp was the added touch to Anna's exploding heart. The moment she felt the blonde's soft luscious lips on hers, all her remaining worries burst into thin air. She stopped caring about everything but the woman whose lips were now on hers. Lips that were awkward and inexperienced but still managed to make her shiver anyway.

The kiss was out of place, so random that Elsa wasn't able to understand what was happening fast enough. She wasn't used to this, haven't kissed anyone besides Anna. She had no experiences aside from that time she was left motionless in their apartment living room. Even so, compared to how gentle that one was, this one felt desperate. Hard. Like Anna was trying to tell her something. When the realization hit, Elsa closed her eyes and willed herself to reciprocate.

_Thank you. Stay with me. Don't let go._

_I love you._

The kiss said it all.

Elsa's tears rolled down her cheeks. It was different from their first kiss which undoubtedly broke both their hearts. This one was better. Much better. So many overwhelming emotions, she could barely keep up. It was too much, and the only thing she could do to let it all out was to cry and return Anna's kiss. A kiss that wasn't sparked by anger, frustration or jealousy. There was still sadness, but it was faint. It didn't matter if there was this lingering saltiness of their tears. For them, it was sweet. Perfect.

When they pulled back, they pressed their foreheads together as if they just had a silent agreement. A tranquil silence fell upon them, only being broken by their soft hot breaths. Neither would open their eyes. They were savoring the moment. Feeling. Melting into each other's sweet embrace.

The first one to open her eyes was Elsa. Her heart fluttered at the peaceful look on Anna's face. Her cheeks were still red, but she was no longer tensed. Elsa wanted to keep staring, but then Anna opened her eyes and broke out into a huge dopey grin.

"You're not fainting," Anna hummed.

At first, Elsa only stared at her dumbly. Seconds later and she remembered how she fainted that time when Anna first asked her for a kiss. Because she couldn't find any words to say, she settled on frowning and was rewarded with an adorable snort. It quickly changed into a cute little gasp when she leaned and gave Anna a soft sweet peck on the lips. Just like that, the redhead's grin was replaced with another tender smile. They shared a moment's eye contact with Anna still rubbing small circles on Elsa's cheek, and then their eyelids fluttered shut followed by their lips finding their rightful half again.

It was much softer, less urgent, and lasted for... Who was counting, anyway? It didn't matter because these kisses were worth a thousand confessions, promises, and vows for the future that was still too mysterious to uphold. At that moment, it didn't matter. Nothing else mattered but them.

Until someone coughed.

They both jumped and pulled away from each other, a blush lighting up their faces before they reluctantly looked at the source of a cough that was obviously meant to interrupt them.

"As much as we'd love to leave you two to your own moment, we really need you both inside." Bulda grinned, trying to stifle a laugh. Gerda, who was accompanying her, was wiggling her eyebrows as well.

The situation made Elsa  _very_ uncomfortable. Probably even more uncomfortable than Anna who was also blushing and twiddling her thumbs, eyes avoiding their mothers' on purpose, and was just looking at Elsa as if she was asking for some silent help. But Elsa didn't know what to say; she could barely talk after that kiss because her heart wouldn't settle down.

"O-Okay," Elsa tried lamely and whatever courage she managed to grasp disappeared when their mothers' grins grew wider.

"W-We'll get inside!" Anna squeaked out.

"Alright." Gerda nodded. "Come on, Bulda. I think they need a few more minutes to calm down."

"Agreed." Bulda started walking back inside, leaving words that made Elsa and Anna think. "So, about that wedding..." she said, though from their distance, it was already quite faint.

An awkward-not-so-awkward silence fell upon the new couple. It was awkward in a sense that their own mothers just saw them kiss. But then, it also didn't feel so awkward because they were caught together. They were embarrassed and humiliated together. It was almost as if...

Elsa blinked.

She slowly looked at Anna who also had the same idea. For a moment, they simply stared at each other with faces so red it could rival that of a fire truck. The nervousness and anxiousness were gone, replaced by comfort and trust. And then, without any sort of signal, they both started laughing... like they were the same children from all those years ago.


	34. Clarity

The snowman's googly eyes drew Elsa to it. For her, it still looked hideous, but Anna called it cute and she had to wonder why. Elsa thought back to the time Anna's mood dampened significantly during their double date. She was afraid to ask for fear that the girl might get sulky. All she could think about was that one word that she heard from Anna.

'Forgot.'

What does it mean? Judging by the way Anna had sulked and even went so far as to run away, maybe there was something about this snowman Elsa  _should_  know about.

"Elsa?" Anna was drying her hair with a towel with her eyes darting between the snowman and her. "Uh... I know it's a stuffed toy, but it might melt if you keep staring at it like that," she giggled.

"Right," Elsa whispered, breathless. She had seen Anna's wet hair before, but this was the first time she allowed herself to watch openly for too long. The only thing that snapped her awake from her trance was the pillow thrown harshly to her face. "Wha- Anna, what's that for?!"

"If you keep staring like that,  _I'll_ be the one melting!"

"Oh." Elsa blinked, and then she smiled. "Well, I... I think I'm having mixed feelings about that."

Elsa chuckled when Anna simply pouted, and then she looked at the stuffed toy again. The eyes were staring back at her as if it was alive.

"What is it?" Anna sat on the soft, trapping the snowman between them. "You keep staring at it."

"I... get the feeling I should know about this toy. Like I forgot something about it? When we went on that double date, you..." Elsa stopped when Anna's face dropped. "S-Sorry."

If Elsa wasn't anxious before, she felt terribly guilty now. There was definitely something about this snowman she couldn't remember.  _Come on, Elsa, think!_ Elsa tried to squeeze her brain and come up with any memory that could involve a snowman.

"It's okay." Anna's voice put a stop to her thoughts. "It's not that important. I just really love it. It reminds me of you."

"Me?" Elsa looked at the odd-looking snowman, having mixed feelings about Anna's statement.

Anna swatted Elsa on the shoulders. "Not the looks!"

"Right," Elsa laughed shakily before clearing her throat. "So, why exactly does this... toy remind you of me?"

Anna's lips curled into a sweet smile as she settled the snowman on her lap with the front of the toy still facing Elsa. The action confused Elsa dearly, but she also felt calm watching the peaceful scene in front of her. The next thing she knew, Anna was already holding on to the soft twiggy arms of the toy.

" _Hi! I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs!_ "

Elsa blinked. Perhaps it was Anna's imitation of a child, or maybe because Anna's hair was loose and wet, or maybe because Anna's face was red and there was a shy grin on her lips, but it took her a few seconds to completely understand what happened. When she did, her first reaction was, of course, to stutter.

"W-Wha—?" Elsa stopped as images of her young self and a young Anna flashed inside her head. "Oh."

Anna's shoulders relaxed upon seeing the realization dawn on Elsa's face. "I know it might be trivial for you, but it really meant a lot to me."

Warmth bloomed within Elsa's chest. She felt embarrassed that she didn't remember the weird looking snowman, but what really came as a shocker was how Anna actually remembered. She remembered and  _treasured_  the memory of Olaf.

The first snowman Elsa ever built for her.

"When you made him, I admit he looked odd, but he wasn't weird. He was different, but I still love him because you made him." Anna gently pulled the stuffed toy closer to her. "You said then that you'll build me an army of snowmen every winter. It was a reckless promise, but you kept it. You did it... until I can manage to stay outside long enough to build my own snowman."

Elsa pursed her lips tight as she watched Anna's adorable shy grin. It sent her mind roaring. She hadn't expected Anna to treasure it so much. She didn't know what to say, but because she felt overwhelmed, she ended up pulling Anna into a tight hug.

"I'm sorry," Elsa gently apologized. "I... I didn't think you'd remember that."

"How can I forget? It's not always that people would build me an army of snowmen! And in case you forgot, that's where my brother got his name." Anna let out a shaky laugh and Elsa tightened her hold. "Thank you, Elsa. Because of you, I was able to enjoy those winters. It really means a lot to me."

Elsa did all of those things mostly because she didn't want Anna to be sad. The girl always dreamt of building her own snowman, but she wasn't allowed to because of being too sensitive to the cold, often getting sick because of it. That was why Elsa made that promise. Eventually, she ended up doing it every winter because Anna would always smile and be her usual self whenever she did. It wasn't until sometime in middle school that Anna was able to outgrow her extreme sensitivity to the cold.

"You... If you say something like that, I don't know what to say." Elsa laughed nervously, making Anna laugh too. "Thank you."

"For what?" Anna pulled back from the hug and looked at Elsa in confusion.

"For being you," Elsa cleared. "For being reckless, bubbly, cheerful... irrational." Anna frowned at the last word. "Sometimes, it's hard to keep up with you and your shenanigans, but because of you, I can be myself. With you, I'm not afraid of being judged because I know that no matter what happens, you'll always accept me."

Elsa cupped Anna's cheeks and gently kissed away the tears that fell just because she was allowed to. It still felt surreal. Being able to kiss Anna, to hug her whenever she wanted to. She couldn't believe it, but this warmth embracing her, it was undeniably real, and she was just utterly blown away by how Anna was looking at her. Even when those turquoise eyes were wet with tears, the devotion and emotions were crystal clear. So clear that Elsa felt like she was flying.

"I love you, Elsa."

Elsa's heart pounded loud and fast, Anna has to hear it too. No matter how many times Anna say it, it still felt new every time. The heartbeat, the nerves, the jitters, and butterflies. It was  _much_ stronger than the previous times Elsa had ever felt it.

"I love you too." Elsa pressed their foreheads together, nuzzling their noses together just because she could. The action elicited a light giggle, and the sweet sound made Elsa grin so much it hurts.

"I wonder what our parents will say," Anna wondered, her voice barely above a whisper. The statement surprised Elsa, but she didn't let it show. "Our mothers saw us, but what about our dads? They're... They're doting fathers. What will they say?"

"'Finally'?" Elsa tried, receiving a playful swat on the tummy.

"I'm serious, Elsa!" Anna leaned back and Elsa gently lets go of her cheeks. "We haven't told them about us yet. A-And dad doesn't even know about me liking girls. I'm pretty sure mom didn't tell him either because... he wasn't confronting me about it," she said shyly and Elsa responded with a small 'hm' sound. "Aren't you worried?"

"Not really," Elsa answered. "My parents know about me liking you for a long time now."

"Wait, what?!" Anna sputtered. "T-They know? That's... You told them?"

"They noticed." Elsa absently reached the tips of her braid with her hands.

"Wha... wait! Let me just..." Anna raised a hand to stop Elsa from speaking before taking a few deep breaths.

The sheer look of nervousness and embarrassment on Anna's face made Elsa want to laugh but decided against it. She let the girl take as many time as she needed. To her, it didn't matter. When she admitted that she liked Anna years ago, her parents were worried because it might only hurt her, but they weren't against the idea. If anything, they were glad because at least they know Anna well. Not to mention, they were also close to Anna's parents.

"O-Okay," Anna huffed. "Okay, uhm... I-I guess I'm the only one left?"

"Why are you nervous? You've already met papa," Elsa chuckled lightly. "If anything, I get the feeling I'm the one who should be scared of your parents. You had a lot of boyfriends, and suddenly, there's me."

"There's nothing wrong with you, Elsa!" Anna scowled, making Elsa jump at the sudden volume and passion in the shorter girl's voice. "And I'm not worried about my parents not allowing you! I'm worried they'd think I don't give you justice!"

"Wha...?"

"It's not a secret that they agreed to let me live away from them because of you. They trust you, Elsa, more than they trust me," Anna pointed out. "You're already like a daughter to them, and I'm worried they might think that I don't... you know... th-that I might only be a burden to you."

Elsa knew she was more responsible than the redhead, but she didn't expect to hear about this now.  _How insecure is she?_ The question left a bitter taste in her mouth. She thought that when involved in a relationship, the lover of the daughter should be the one afraid of the daughter's parents, not the other way around.

"I don't think you have to worry about that." Elsa cupped the back of Anna's head, gently placing it in the crook of her neck. "You're parents trust you, Anna. I know."

"How can you be so sure?" Anna asked while playing on Elsa's shirt.

"They're my second parents. I've been with them long enough to know."

Anna leaned back to meet Elsa's sincere eyes. "But you're still afraid to face them?"

"I think that's only natural. You left their house completely straight and now, there's me." Anna frowned. "It's just... I can't explain it."

"They're not homophobic. They know about you and even let me live with you. I doubt they're going to hate you because of this." Anna leaned her head on Elsa's neck again, snuggling closer if possible.

Elsa decided not to respond. Instead, she played with Anna's hair again and let the comfortable silence engulf them. In truth, she wasn't  _that_ scared of the possibility of Anna's parents breaking them apart or disapproving of them. The chance was close to zero. She was simply just afraid to mess up this relationship with Anna.  _I won't tell her that, though. She's still clearly afraid herself_ , she thought.

"Anna?" Elsa waited until Anna acknowledged her. "Are you still jealous of Belle?" she asked and almost regretted it when Anna pulled away from her again, only to look at her with narrowed eyes.

"Why?"

"I just want to know," Elsa explained. "You're an open book, but sometimes, I want to hear it from you. It's scary to assume that you're okay when you're really not."

"Maybe." Anna pulled the stuff toy closer to her. "It's not something that can easily be forgotten, I think. I believe in you, Elsa, but I don't know her well. All I know about her was what little things I saw from that date, and even _that_  was a little unsettling." Elsa was about to open her mouth, but Anna raised her hand to stop. "I'll be fine. I'll get over it."

"Belle noticed," Elsa began, unsure of how to explain. "She noticed that you were jealous. She insisted we try things out together to make you jealous, but I kept telling her nothing will happen."

"Wait...  _What_?"

"She was confident about it, but I was scared because I was afraid you wouldn't be." Elsa nervously fiddled with the stuff toy's leg. "I kept telling her it's the other way around. That I'm the one getting jealous of you and Hans. It hurt when... when you were awkward around me but looked comfortable when with him."

"You were trying to make me jealous?" Anna's eyebrows disappeared behind her bangs. "Are you serious?"

" _She_ was trying to," Elsa corrected. "She said it was to help me out. She's a little pushy, especially when I was still in denial. When I kept telling myself that there was no way you could feel the same for me, she was the one who got frustrated. I think... I think it was because she was convinced that the feeling's mutual."

"That's..." Anna trailed off, the urge to sulk for making her jealous on purpose suddenly replaced with concern and understanding. "Hans said something similar."

This caught Elsa's interest. "He did?"

"I... think he also knew. He told me once... to try and look at things from a distance, and that I'll be surprised at what I could see."

After those words were spoken, a silence surrounded the couple. There wasn't a heavy tension in the air; they were just gazing into each other's eyes with their thoughts slowly synchronizing. Then, Anna's eyes glinted in realization as she slowly leaned back.

"No way..." Anna said with a voice barely above a whisper.

"I think it's possible," Elsa agreed with a shrug. "We both have feelings involved and afraid to step up. Hans and Belle were outsiders. They can see the bigger picture. That, and maybe they just know us well. The us 'now' instead of the one from when we were children?"

Anna blinked, twice. A few seconds spent in silence, but this time it wasn't uncomfortable. They were clearing up everything that could possibly hurt the other. Maybe it was just a temporary relief, but neither cared. This was only the beginning of a long journey ahead of them, after all.

"You know, I think they match." Elsa grinned, ignoring the way Anna's jaw dropped. "Belle is single, and it looks like Hans is too."

"Whoa, whoa! Wait! Slow down!" Anna raised a hand to stop Elsa from speaking. She adjusted on her seat and leaned closer to Elsa, narrowing her eyes as a warning. "You're not trying to get them together, are you?"

"No!" Elsa denied. "I just thought it would be funny if they ended up together. Don't you think they're sort of similar? And they already met, so who knows?"

"Not that I'm complaining, but are you sure Belle will be fine?"

"Aaaaand we're back to this again," Elsa groaned before adjusting herself to her seat to face Anna completely. "Why are you insisting she likes me that way?"

"I... I don't know?" Elsa raised an eyebrow. "You used her name! When you told me you want to try things out with her. I get it, you didn't want to fake-date me anymore, but why her?"

"I don't want to drop a fictional name because I know you'll ask to meet that someone. Belle was the only girl close to me aside from you, and she's the only one I can ask that favor from," Elsa gently explained. "She was the one who convinced me to confess, but you beat me to it."

"Wh-What?! What did I do?!"

"When you came back from Hans' after three days, I was afraid I lost you to him. I already let it happened before and I just... a-anyway! I was about to tell you that day, but then you asked to have a double date."

"B-But you agreed!" Anna pointed out, whining. "Back then, I thought you were going out with Belle! I called the deal off because you said you liked her so I just..."

"I was about to confess, Anna," Elsa repeated.

Anna shivered at the way Elsa looked at her.  _She was planning to confess to me?!_ The thought was definitely welcome. She would've loved to see that. But hearing about it now? Anna didn't know what to feel or say or do. If she was in Elsa's position then, maybe she would've done the same thing. Willing herself to admit her own feelings, but the other party started talking about having a double date?

"Oh my god," Anna groaned and covered her red face.

The sight alone made Elsa laugh. Now that they talked about it, it was rather silly. Maybe if she had just been honest then, she could've saved them both the drama and jealousy. But no. Back then, she was a coward.  _Still is_. The only difference was that Anna was with her now and their feelings for each other were perfectly clear.

"There're no romantic feelings between us, Anna. Belle and I like each other, but not the same way you and I do," Elsa said with a gigantic grin.

" _Ugh_ ," Anna whined, still covering her face.

Elsa could see Anna's ears turning an impossible shade of pink. It only served to make her giant grin grow wider. She gently reached out to Anna's wrist, trying to pry away those hands, but Anna only whined like a petulant child.

"Anna," Elsa tried, but her breath hitched when Anna grabbed her collar and hid her face in her chest instead. Elsa could feel the heat radiating from her girlfriend - a testament to how much she was blushing, completely embarrassed with her realization.

"Sorry," Anna whimpered.

"Don't be," Elsa cooed, wrapping her arms around the girl. "It was also my fault."

Anna let out a soft giggle, causing Elsa to smile again. It was still embarrassing to become  _this_ open to embracing Anna's clinginess, but she figured it wasn't the time to hesitate. If it would make Anna feel more at ease and forget about unnecessary worries, she'd be more than willing to comply. She liked it anyway, but there was no way she'd admit it out loud knowing full well that Anna wouldn't let her hear the end of it once they'd adjusted to their new relationship.


	35. Rule Number Five (end)

The day didn't start out the way Elsa wanted it to. She woke up extremely excited but also sad because today was the day she and Anna would be going back to the big city. They needed to go back to fix some requirements in their respective universities. Elsa was sad to leave home, but she was also excited because she would have Anna all to herself, free from the teasing and knowing glances of their mothers.

Unfortunately, even when she had taken careful measures to warn and remind Anna how they would be leaving that day, the girl had yet to pack her bags. Elsa tried to help but was forcefully shove out of the girl's room without so much as an apology. The moment Anna slammed the door, she knew they would be taking quite some time before leaving. She didn't know if Anna was also trying to brush up on her packing skills, but judging by the way she frowned and mumbled incoherent words for being so rudely woken up early in the morning, Elsa knew she would take long.

Then, just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, she had to sit on the sofa in the living room while trying her best to woman up under the scrutinizing gazes of their parents. She tried not to shrink and fuse with the sofa because that would be weird. Even when she felt terribly anxious, nervous and felt like throwing up due to uneasiness, she sat still and focused on Olaf who was playing with the toy robots that Anna and she (based on Olaf's knowledge) bought for him.

"Elsie, look!" Olaf showed her a small robot origami.

"Oh wow." Elsa's eyebrows shot up to her hairline at the sight of the cute paper robot. She had seen the boy create some simple origami before, but this was the first time he made a robot or something that looked like it. "When did you learn this?" she asked, taking the paper from him.

"I learned a lot while you were gone! My art teacher knew how to make some and she taught us simple models!"

"Really?" Elsa briefly wondered if he was still talking about the same teacher that she and Anna had all those years ago, half wondering if the said teacher was still alive. The thought was quickly pushed to the deepest recesses of her mind, mentally berating herself for being rude. "Can you make something bigger?"

"I can, but I want it to be small," Olaf shrugged and picked up the two robots.

"Why?"

"Because I already have big robots." Olaf showed the robots to her again. "That one is the baby robot, and these are his or her parents!"

Elsa resisted the urge to ask and comment on how all robots look like a male to her. Do robots even have genders?  _They're machines._ Why was she taking a child seriously? Oh right. Because their parents were blatantly staring at her. She needed all the distraction she could have.

"Elsie, can I have a word with you?" Cliff finally asked.

The ominous approach had Elsa forgetting how to breathe. She was almost sure that all colors were drained from her cheeks. Strange. She had known these people all her life, but maybe that was also the reason why she was uneasy? Elsa hoped that Anna would come down and help her deal with this situation.

"Olaf, go up and help your sister pack her things," Bulda offered and when Olaf opened his mouth to say something, she gave him a warning glance. Like a defeated puppy, he bolted towards his sister's room.  _I doubt he's going to help_ , Elsa thought grimly.

The moment they heard a loud crashing noise and a door slamming, they knew that the siblings had some sort of playful argument again with Anna probably dissolving into a spiel about Olaf not just barging into her room. Afterwards, a heavy silence fell upon them. Elsa forgot how many times she tried to swallow the lump at the back of her throat and lost count of how many times she licked her dry lips.

"Bulda and Gerda here told us that... you and Anna were kissing?" Cliff prodded gently.

Elsa cleared her throat to shake the nerves off. "Yes. Yes, we were."

"Why?" Cliff asked with an unreadable expression.

"I..." Elsa looked at her mother and father for help, only to find them smiling gently at her.  _Don't just smile there! Help me out_ , she huffed inwardly. "Anna, she... I asked her if... if she can be my girlfriend, a-and she said yes."

"NO!" Cliff said with a surprising sound of authority, making Elsa wince and hunch her shoulders up to her ears. "—is what I won't really say." Elsa opened one eye to look at him. "Honestly, I just wanted to try that out sometime," he snorted, receiving a playful swat on the shoulder from Bulda.

Elsa could only blink and look at them in mild disbelief. She probably looked funny because, soon, the four adults started laughing. She fought back the urge to scowl and complain how much he almost gave her a heart attack, knowing full well that this wasn't just the best friend of her father now, but also the father of Anna, her girlfriend.

"Why are you tensed, Elsie? It's just me," Cliff chuckled, smiling apologetically.

"W-Well, you're still her father and... you can always disagree."

"Why on earth will I disagree? Elsie, I've never seen anyone look at Anna the way you do. I can't imagine the pain you went through ever since she started going out with Kristoff or any other guy, but I'm glad you didn't give up," Cliff assured, leaving Elsa's heart melting.

The truth was that everyone knew about her feelings for Anna. For a long time. The first to notice was, of course, her own parents. When Anna found out about her plans to go to a university in the big city, she started convincing her own parents about living alone with her. Elsa panicked nonstop and when her parents noticed, they started asking about it until she gave in. To her horror, Bulda and Cliff decided to visit their house just when they were talking about it - courtesy of being so close, they didn't even have to knock.

At the time, Elsa could only be thankful that Anna wasn't there.

The words and faces of Anna's parents back then were still fresh inside her mind. She was forever thankful that they trusted her enough to leave the girl in her hands, never once judging her for loving their daughter in more than just a friendly way. Back then, she didn't know that it would be possible for Anna to love her too. Now that she looked back, she had to wonder if Cliff and Bulda knew something more about the situation then.

After all, they  _did_  tell her not to give up on their daughter.

"But, Elsie, my only request is that you don't bottle up your feelings," Bulda insisted, voice laced with worry. "If Anna hurt you in any way, don't keep it all inside. Tell her and talk it over. Anna isn't the only one we care about, but you as well. Even before all this, we already treat you like a daughter of our own. What more now?"

"Oh, she doesn't bottle it up because I don't let her," Gerda snorted and rolled her eyes. "Though I also agree. There will come a time you won't be able to share a problem with me or your father, but you shouldn't hide anything from Anna. The last time you did it, she assumed a lot of things."

"W-Why are you talking like... like we're going to get married?" Elsa asked, feeling awkward for the sudden pieces of advice and attention.

"Because you will be!" They said in unison, leaving Elsa stunned and feel a little pride swell within her. She was unable to respond, and she could only blush and be humiliated by four adults.

Despite the rather awkward situation, Elsa was happy about the turn of events. Hearing their parents talk like this made everything more real and true. The events that had transpired ever since she came home and talked to Anna were fully sinking in. The confessions, the tears, the hugs, and the... kisses.

_This is real, right?_

Elsa was wearing a dopey smile, unaware that the adults were now looking at her with their own knowing smiles. She was blushing, she knew, but she couldn't wipe the elation off her face. To finally have Anna in her arms for real? It was the best feeling in the world. Anna loved her the same way she did. Anna was hers, and she was Anna's.

"Olaf, give that back!"

All heads turned to the staircase to see Anna carrying a huge travel bag, a backpack, and the snowman stuff toy in place. Elsa frowned, trying to search her mind on where to begin. Anna seemed to have noticed since she also frowned.

"Don't ask."

"I didn't even say anything yet," Elsa pointed out a little dryly before standing up from the couch and sauntering towards Anna, making sure not to remove the stern look on her face. "You're bringing all those..."

"Don't ask!" Anna whined.

"If I remember correctly, you didn't have anything with you when you left." Elsa let her eyes roam around Anna's things. "What are these?"

Anna opened her mouth to say something, but Olaf beat her to it. "Elsie, Anna has a lot of these!" Olaf showed her a huge chocolate bar that had Elsa's eyebrows twitching.

"An—"

"It's a five-hour drive! I'm going to need those!" Anna pouted, almost succeeding in shaking Elsa's resolve. Elsa deepened her frown and, to her horror, those sinful lips jutted further. It was inviting and enticing and really pink and wet and their parents were right there so Elsa had to get herself together.

Elsa darted her eyes between the huge travel bag and the backpack for a few seconds, trying to figure out which had the clothes and which had the chocolates. Her eyes settled on the travel bag, and then she smirked. "Leave this and just bring that backpack."

"Elsa, come on! I need my daily dose of chocolate!"

"You don't need a bag full of sweets, Anna." When Anna batted her eyelashes, Elsa could only swallow, knowing she lost. "Bring only four to five bars. You can't finish everything. They'll just melt. Leave the others to Olaf."

"You underestimate my love for chocolate!" Anna gasped and placed a hand on her chest in mock hurt.

"No, I'm trying to help you live healthily," Elsa corrected. "You trying to eat those in a span of five hours mean trouble. Leave them, Anna," she warned, face softening when Anna's shoulders dropped. Elsa smiled and leaned close to the girl's ear so their parents couldn't hear. "You can have all the chocolate you want on that theme park anniversary."

When she pulled back, a sight of Anna's blushing face welcomed Elsa. A part of her knew that it wasn't only because she offered to take Anna to the same theme park with discounted chocolates for couples, but because of her intruding in Anna's personal space. When the redhead grunted and half-heartedly let go of the travel bag, Elsa couldn't stop herself from grinning.

"Well, that's definitely a plus." They looked at the source of the voice to see their parents not trying to hide their laughter. "I'm glad Anna listens to someone when it comes to letting go of chocolates."

"Mom!" Anna whined.

"What? I'm not complaining," Bulda giggled and marveled at the way Anna covered her face with both hands, every flesh visible a bright shade of red.  _And I had to deal with all four of them at once_ , Elsa sighed inwardly.

"I think I don't have to say it anymore, but I'll say it anyway. Don't drive too fast and wear your seatbelts," Gerda said casually and Elsa fought the urge to roll her eyes. "Don't do anything reckless. I know you can't get each other pregnant, bu—"

"Ma!" Elsa's eyes went as wide as dinner plates and her face blew up in a furious blush, along with the girl standing beside her. "We're still starting out. Don't... Oh my god."

"I was only teasing, darling," Gerda promised and Elsa suppressed a cringe at the term of endearment. "I trust you both and, frankly enough, I'm not worried. I know you'll both be fine," she said as she directed a wink at Anna. The action made Elsa look at the redhead to see her blush profusely again.

"What's going on?"

All heads turned to look at Olaf, mild shocks written on their faces. He had been quiet, they barely noticed him even when he was just running a few minutes ago. All too suddenly, Elsa felt anxious for a different reason. It was a feeling similar to the one she felt when Cliff started grilling her in a way. This boy was Anna's little brother and he also had a say in this. What would he think when his older sister by blood and older sister by bond were now a couple?

"Olaf, what do you think about Elsie being your older sister too?" Gerda asked, a gentle motherly grin on her face.

"Huh?" Olaf tilted his head to the side. "Isn't Elsie already my sister? She and Anna always play with me and they're always together!"

"Well, Elsie  _is_  Anna's best friend." Bulda hummed before smiling. "Olaf, hon, what do you think if they got married in the future? To each other?"

"Mo—"

"Well?" Bulda said to cut Anna off. Her eyes were fixated on the little boy who was now looking up, seemingly deep in thought.

"Elsie and Anna marry? Like you and daddy? Mama and Papa?" Olaf asked and waited until Bulda nodded. The silence that followed made the two girls in question uneasy. They were glad that it wasn't them who ended up asking or explaining it to him, but his response was still just as important. "I like that!"

"You do?!" Anna spluttered, and though there was almost a complete and utter disbelief in her voice, Elsa could understand why. Even she was shocked at how Olaf answered; he sounded so sure.

"Ahuh. If you two get married, that means Elsie will be with us forever!" Olaf exclaimed. "If Elsie marries someone else, she's gonna go away, and I don't want that! So hurry up and marry her, Anna, or I will!"

Anna could only gaze at him with the heat accumulating on her cheeks. She felt embarrassed but also relieved that her little brother didn't mind. In fact, she was more than just glad because their families weren't bothered with it. It was heartwarming- save for the times when their parents would tease, of course. They do seem to be having a kick out of seeing her and Elsa embarrassed.

"See? Everyone's ready except you two!" Bulda snorted.

"Mom, isn't this the part where you should say 'studies first'?"

"I'm not worried. I'm sure Elsie will make sure you're studying well." The other adults laughed at Bulda's statement. "I do hope you'll take care of her, Anna. Elsie is—"

"I know, I know!" Anna whined. "Okay, this is starting to get awkward. Like, a whole lot of awkward. I'm out!" Anna stumbled her way to the door, stopping for a second before turning around. "I-I'll see you all on my next break!" she spluttered before finally stepping out of the house.

"That was refreshing." Gerda giggled and Elsa could only shake her head with a fond smile. Though she was left alone with everyone again, she still found herself incredibly amused about the tiniest reactions she could elicit from the redhead.

"Thank you," Elsa said, catching the adults' attention, "for everything."

They smiled gently at her, and even when they didn't say anything, Elsa knew they were just as thankful. She was only proven right the moment they started giving her hugs of their own, whispering sweet nothings to her ear. No, she wasn't crying. She was overwhelmed with love that all she could do was smile and grin stupidly.

Elsa blinked when her phone rang, signaling a message. The sound alone told her who it was from solely because it was personalized. Though she already knew what the contents probably were, she still opened it to make sure.

 **From:** Anna  
 **To:** Elsa  
I'm toasted out here! Hurry up! :(

"Well," Elsa sighed and put her phone back inside her bag. "I think we have to go. I get the feeling there's going to be a long traffic waiting for us by the city."

"Alright. You two take care. No funny businesses," Kai warned.

"Elsie, bring me another robot, okay?" Olaf waved his robots around for emphasis. "You chose the cooler one than Anna's! I can't wait for your next gift!"

Elsa tilted her head, surprised. She didn't choose any of those robots, but Olaf said she chose the cooler one.  _Must be something Anna said_ , she thought.

"Olaf, you do  _not_ ask for a gift. It's something they give of their own free will," Cliff admonished lightly.

"But..." Olaf tried, but when Cliff looked at him with a stern gaze, his shoulders slumped in defeat.

When Cliff nodded, satisfied with his answer, he quickly stepped out of the house to bid his farewells to his daughter. The three adults followed along and once Elsa was sure that they weren't looking, she lightly ruffled Olaf's hair.

"Robots on my next visit. I promise." Elsa winked and giggled when Olaf's face lit up and hugged her.

Once Olaf gathered his wits, he ran towards his sister who was outside of their house with Elsa following closely from behind. As soon as she stepped out of the house, Elsa saw their parents' tormenting Anna again. Even if she would like to save the girl from further embarrassment, there was a twisted side of her that chose not to. She took her time watching, wanting to embed the scene in her memories for safekeeping.

"Okay, fine. I had enough teasing for the day," Bulda snorted.

"Ugh," Anna rubbed her temples, clearly agitated about something and leaving Elsa with no other choice but to jump in.

"We'll visit on our next break," Elsa said, noticing how much Anna relaxed when she spoke.

"Or we can visit you. I think I actually miss the big city," Kai suggested. "It might be fun if you two could tour us again someday. We're already familiar with this place. A change of pace might do us some good."

"I want to visit the theme park again!" Olaf quipped. "The one where there's a castle that looked like ice! The last time we went there, I got many toys!"

"Yeah, I think you all should go," Anna agreed. "It would save me and Elsa the travel time."

"Way to be frank." Bulda flicked Anna's forehead, earning her a groan. "But yes, I guess you're right. I do miss that place too and I'd like to make sure everything's going well in the apartment."

"You're always welcome." Elsa smiled, receiving a look of approval from everyone. "While I hate to break it apart, Anna and I really have to go."

The adults gave them each a hug which Elsa happily returned. It was slightly half-hearted on Anna's part though, and Elsa could tell. It was mainly the reason why she was in a rush. She knew that something was up, and she wanted to talk about it fast.

After another series of warnings and reminders from their parents, they finally let them go. Without saying anything more, Anna entered the car and Elsa followed along. She wanted to ask right then and there but decided against it knowing that their parents wouldn't get inside the house until they go. With the last wave of a hand, Elsa drove off and caught glimpses of Anna who was staring out the window.

"Eyes on the road, Elsa," Anna said lazily and, for a moment, Elsa had to wonder how she knew. She quickly dismissed the thought and parked on the side while fully aware of how the redhead looked around in confusion. "Why did you stop?"

"You're bothered," Elsa stated as a fact. "Did they tell you something?"

Anna's eyes snapped to her own fingers on top of her lap, looking uneasy. "The usual," she said. "Why does everyone think I'm the one who's going to mess this up? I'm not saying that it will be you, but... it really does wonders to me, you know? When my own mother and father would keep telling me how I'm not supposed to be a burden to you," she admitted with a soft voice. "I know they're right, but it was as if they were already expecting it from me."

Elsa didn't say anything, simply gazing at Anna whose face looked forlorn and still refused to look at her. Her heart ached, and she felt herself desperately searching for something to say. Something that would make Anna stop worrying about it entirely. She felt happy because Anna valued their relationship so much that she wanted it to be perfect, but seeing her like this?

"I love you," Elsa confessed.

Anna blushed at the random confession. There was no doubt about it; Elsa's feelings were real. She could tell with the way those three words were spoken and with the way the blonde looked at her. Three simple words, but they held such a deep meaning when Elsa would say it to her. No matter how many times she heard it, it never failed to deliver this sweet, sweet shock down her spine.

"W-What's that for?" Anna spluttered, trying not to wiggle under Elsa's intense gaze.

"Do you?" Elsa asked instead of answering. Anna blinked, resisting the urge to ask if Elsa was being serious. She thought she had made her feelings perfectly clear. Why was Elsa asking? She didn't know, but the look in her eyes told her that she  _has_  to give an answer.

"I do," Anna promised, refusing to make Elsa think otherwise. "Elsa, I love you so much that it scares me. I don't want to mess this up. I believe every word you said, but it's hard to just let my insecurities go like that. Especially when my own parents kept telling me those things."

"You're the one I'm in love with, Anna, not your parents," Elsa gently pointed out. "Maybe they do know a part of you that I don't know about, but I also know a part of you that they don't. Sleepovers are different from living under the same roof."

"What do you mean?"

"They didn't know how we were when we started living away from them." Elsa removed her seat belt to face Anna completely. "They didn't know that I can only sleep well when I'm with you, that you're the only one who can make me try something artistic, and that you're the only one who can make me listen when I force myself too much when doing something. But more importantly, they know that I love you..." She cupped Anna's cheeks and gently pulled her closer to nudge their noses together. "...but they have no idea how much I do."

"Y-You..." Anna stammered, cheeks heating up noticeably under Elsa's palms. "You lied to me!" She accused with a frown. "You said you weren't romantic! H-How come you... you!" She pouted and Elsa couldn't suppress a grin.

"I'm not." Elsa giggled and let go of Anna's cheeks, basking in the adorable blushing redhead who was now hers. "I'm only being honest. If I come off as romantic, then I guess I owe it to you."

"Okay, fine! Clearly, we need to set some rules!" Anna huffed.

"Wha...?" Elsa blinked. "Anna, why do we need ru—"

"Rule number one!" Elsa opened her mouth to say something, but clearly, Anna wasn't going to have any of it. "If you're going to be romantic anyway, why not start calling me something other than 'Anna'? I'm yours and if I'm being honest, I want everyone to know that I am yours as you are mine!"

"Wha—"

"Rule number two!" Anna said to cut her off again. "You are not allowed to flirt with someone else! You're not allowed to lead other people on! These things you say and the way you treat me, you're only allowed to do it to me!"

Elsa's jaw dropped, but her heart started racing inside her chest. Anna wasn't letting up, and even if these rules were quite similar to the original ones, it was strange how Elsa found herself not minding at all.

"Rule number three!" Anna said as she raised another finger. "You will tell me if you're mad or hurt about something, as I will to you. If we have a problem, we're going to talk about it. No more running away or keeping it all bottled up inside. I don't want another repetition of what happened before we got together."

Elsa smiled at this. It was different from the original rule of not talking back to your partner. No doubt she preferred this one over that. With the way Anna gave a tiny smile of her own, Elsa knew she was thinking along the same lines.

"Rule number four." Anna raised her fourth finger and smirked. "Yes, Elsa, we're going to kiss often. A lot. You've deprived me of that for a long time that I had to give you a bittersweet first kiss. You didn't even let me kiss you on the lips before that! I mean... well, like, you know? Aside from that one time after the bar...?"

"I'm no—"

"Rule number five," Anna said, eyes closing and brows furrowing.

The sudden mention of that rule made Elsa's fingers twitch. Why was Anna talking about that? Surely, it wasn't the one Elsa made? It was already broken by both of them. There has to be something new. One that she was completely clueless about. But then, the first four rules were somewhat similar to the original.

Elsa swallowed.

With Anna's eyes closed, Elsa feared what was to come.  _I can't tell what she's thinking_ , she thought nervously. Not a moment after, she saw the side of Anna's lips curve into a smile. Tanned eyelids fluttered open, revealing a beautiful pair of turquoise blue eyes.

"Don't fall in love..." Anna cupped Elsa's cheeks and pulled her closer, placing a soft and gentle kiss on her lips. "...with someone else."

It took a few seconds for Elsa to completely process. Her heart raced like never before, and this time, she couldn't stop the heated blush on her cheeks. She knew, and it was already proven from years of trying to move on, that there was absolutely no way she could ever break that rule. Judging by the look in Anna's eyes, she was also promising as much.

"No problem..." Elsa pulled Anna in for another kiss. "... _babe_." She grinned widely and was rewarded with the most wonderful and magical velvety laugh on earth.

Sometimes, Elsa couldn't help but wonder what could have happened if she didn't agree with the fake relationship with Anna. If the redhead didn't ask her then, could she still have Anna in her arms like this? Would Anna continuously look for a guy who resembled her? Was there a chance that Anna could realize her own feelings even without their pseudo-relationship?

Those were questions that didn't have answers, but Elsa didn't care anymore. It no longer mattered. The most important thing was that it happened. Anna asked her, and they were together now because of it. Maybe there will be struggles in the future, but Elsa knew from the bottom of her heart that she and Anna won't ever give up on what they have.

With or without Rule Number Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I decided to post this here as well. This was my first ever elsanna fic, so forgive all the annoying bits. It was done last December 2, 2016 and ended on March 4, 2017. I decided to post all chapters here at once and didn't see the need to wait every single day for a new chapter because, in FFNet, it's completed anyway!


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